Do people on this board believe you have to try same sex to be bi?

[miamiuu]

Just curious where the people on this board stand since alot of posts tend to relate to sex. Me I consider myself bi although I have never had sex with another male. I know I'm attracted to some guys and get turned on by same sex videos with guys. Hell, I have even had loving feels for other guys. I just don't understand why the sex part seems to be the most focus here.

[DiamondDog]

I don't believe that. I knew I was bi (or whatever you want to call it), long before I was sexually active with anyone of any gender.

Human beings are sexual creatures. I'm convinced that people are pretty much always looking for sex but that could be the ameteur biologist in me speaking. :P ;)

[deepbluejamie]

PERSONALLY, I KNOW SEVERAL PEOPLE WHO ARE BISEXUAL BUT HAVE NEVER HAD AN INTIMATE RELATIONSHIP WITH SOMEONE OF THE OPPOSITE GENDER THAN THEIR ORIGINAL PREFERENCE.
Bisexuality includes everyone who finds it hard to believe that someone can only be interested in one gender. I personally, find it hard to believe that everyone is not attracted to both genders.
If you feel desires towards both genders, then you are somewhere in the middle on the Klein and the Kinsey scale and are bisexual.
The sex part is a beautiful part of any relationship and because there are others that have accepted their preferences here. It is a place to find comfort in discussing our feelings in regards to friendship, love and yes, sexual relationships.
If you feel like you are among friends, then the dam opens up on all those things you never talk about around the tense people in society

[billy_campbell]

I believe you can be bisexual and never have had sex just like I believe you can be hetrosexual and never have had sex.

[Herbwoman39]

I know a 35 year old woman who's still a virgin and she is hetero. I'm 39 and never had a complete sexual experience with a woman, but I know I'm Bi.
You don't HAVE to try same sex intimacy to be bisexual. You can be mentally and emotionally Bi without being physically Bi.

Now, since I'm still technically a Bi virgin, do I *want* to try it? Oh god YES, BUT only with the right partner and ONLY with hubby's approval.

[zizzy]

I know exactly what you mean. So many people just think bisexuality is about the sex! I came here to talk about my sexual attractions and my emotions for both sexes. Not just to talk about what my fanasties!

[innaminka]

I believe you can be bisexual and never have had sex just like I believe you can be hetrosexual and never have had sex.

I agree, but its in that theoretical zone.
But I guess the definition means to be a ble to love people of both sexes; not necessarily having to have sex.

Intangible.

[deepbluejamie]

I know a 35 year old woman who's still a virgin and she is hetero. I'm 39 and never had a complete sexual experience with a woman, but I know I'm Bi.
You don't HAVE to try same sex intimacy to be bisexual. You can be mentally and emotionally Bi without being physically Bi.

Now, since I'm still technically a Bi virgin, do I *want* to try it? Oh god YES, BUT only with the right partner and ONLY with hubby's approval.

:bigrin: You sound exactly like my girlfriend, She is bisexual and knows that she would "want" to with just the right person. Although, she does have one less hurdle. I am totally open to her exploring her bi side.
Heck, if Miss Wonderful comes into her life, how is a boyfriend she knows is bi himself going to tell her , NO.

I support any bi person, virgin or not that admits to themselves that they ARE bisexual. Beats hiding your whole life.

[smokey]

I agree, but its in that theoretical zone.
But I guess the definition means to be a able to love people of both sexes; not necessarily having to have sex.

Intangible.


WELL ya know...while I agree that you can be Bi (or straight or gay) without the sex...in the long run the sex is the acid test. I know several people who know that they are throughly straight because they tried sex with their own gender and felt "profoundly uncomfortable" and "that while they completed the act, they knew it wasn't for them." And I have heard the same sort of comments from avowed gays on their attempts at hetrosex.

You can find other men you think are attractive and kinda get turned on by them, but really that is not quite the same thing. Theories aside sex is really the only way to truly tell....that you throughly enjoy it and want more, but still want woman as well (or if you are predominately gay, vice a versa.)

[Lorcan]

If you know you're bi then you know you're bi, sex or not. I was virgin with respect to women for 28 years. I knew i was bi since i was 9.

If you're are just curious or not sure if you're bi, then you have to have sex.


I just don't understand why the sex part seems to be the most focus here.
I guess that's because sex is so fun. :bigrin: But i get tired of that focus too, so if you have anything else to talk about, please feel free!

[Azrael]

I agree. I don't think you have to have sex to confirm existing feelings.

[DiamondDog]

WELL ya know...while I agree that you can be Bi (or straight or gay) without the sex...in the long run the sex is the acid test. I know several people who know that they are throughly straight because they tried sex with their own gender and felt "profoundly uncomfortable" and "that while they completed the act, they knew it wasn't for them." And I have heard the same sort of comments from avowed gays on their attempts at hetrosex.

You can find other men you think are attractive and kinda get turned on by them, but really that is not quite the same thing. Theories aside sex is really the only way to truly tell....that you throughly enjoy it and want more, but still want woman as well (or if you are predominately gay, vice a versa.)
true.
lots of het/gay people will try same/opposite gendered sex usually just once; but I'd think that they usually don't go deeper into their attractions towards the same/opposite gender; but anything's possible.

[gentlepen9]

I don’t think you have to try same sex to be bi. I think that part of the reason why sex is look towards as the barometer of someone’s orientation is because it’s easier to classify yourself based upon behavior. We look at a person’s behavior and label them from that. It’s much easier than getting into the complexity of your thoughts and feelings. What’s interesting is if you focus only on sexual behavior as the determining factor than what can you say about those who actively engage in sexual acts with both men and women yet they may claim they are gay or straight? In their mind they might feel as though it’s just physical pleasure and it doesn’t really matter whose doing the pleasuring but when it comes down to who they want to wake up next to, share their lives with or write love letters to then you might be able to tell where their heart truly lies. Or what about those men and women who don’t really care too much for sex or like sex at all but if asked they might consider themselves straight, gay, lesbian, bi? I don’t think sex should be the main focus in determining which way you go but you should also look towards your heart; your feelings.

[Reprob8]

At times I feel straight, at others I feel gay and I almost never feel attraction for both sexes at the same time, I think that if I was to try and do something while I was in the wrong frame of mind I would not be very succesfull and this may ruin future attempts. If it is going to happen for me I think it is something that will have to develop with someone over time and eventually the chemistry may be right or the planest aligned accordingly and something will happen. I think the first time and how it is approached is very important and trying to force an attraction when none can exist with a particular person will just cause pain and confusion.

Hope that made sense.

[Nara_lovely]

I don't think you 'have' to do anything to prove to yourself who you are.

I've also not found this site mostly about sex; I see information...about sexuality, life, problems, celebrations, issues and plain old curiosity. It's a place to connect with people who not only understand, but who are mostly accepting of wherever someone is at.

Yeehaa for this place!

[anne27]

I had to have sex with a woman before I knew for sure that I was bi. For me, it was all fantasy up until that point. Until I had been through the experience and felt all of the physical aspects, I wasn't comfortable calling myself bi.

But that's just me. I have no doubt that other people know themselves far better and know that they are bi regardless of their experiences.

[suegeorge]

Like everyone else here (I think) I don't believe you actually have to have had same-sex sex to know whether you are bi, although for some people actually doing it makes you decide for definite! And, of course, there is a lot more to sexuality than just doing it - emotions, falling in love, attractions etc.
Personally, I knew I was bi for years beforehand; it took me a long while to pluck up the courage.

Bisexuality and Beyond (http://suegeorgewrites.blogspot.com)

[Long Duck Dong]

lol I tend to think of it this way...... I don't need to succeed at suicide to be regarded as suicidal lol.....

a person can tell they are biseuxal by the feelings and atrractions they feel in side, cos thats where the first indications are about your sexuality..... you would never sleep with a person of the same sex if there was not a desire or a inclination to sleep or experiment with same sex partners

[Avocado]

Well I'm bi and intend to have a monoganous relationship with my female fiancee till the day I die.

[spirit_dreamer07]

Just curious where the people on this board stand since alot of posts tend to relate to sex. Me I consider myself bi although I have never had sex with another male. I know I'm attracted to some guys and get turned on by same sex videos with guys. Hell, I have even had loving feels for other guys. I just don't understand why the sex part seems to be the most focus here.

I agree with you, although we are sexual creatures..we are also creatures of choice but not all bisexuals are centered around sex even though most of these posts seem that way.

I think its the person you are inside that matters the most.

[TashaSW]

I agree with you, although we are sexual creatures..we are also creatures of choice but not all bisexuals are centered around sex even though most of these posts seem that way.

I think its the person you are inside that matters the most.

I agree :) Ive always grown to believe its the inside that counts not the outside.... the outside is more of a carrying case for whats inside, beside, as my mother always told me "if you just judge the outside and don't like what you see, you may be missing out on getting to know a great person"

[m.doggg]

I tottaly think that you can be bi without having sex with the same sex. I havn't had any expeiriences with a guy yet but i consider myself bi because I fantasize about guys. My bisexuality is based on sexual feelings though.