Telling parents

[Philbert]

I'm after some advise, about the best way to tell my parents. I have been telling my friends that i'm bi for the last few weeks, but still havent told my parents. i'm not really sure how would be best, i don't think they'll really mind too much, but it's still difficult to tell them. any advise would be welcome

[Sex in Words]

How timely it is you post!
We will have a feature article on telling your parents you're bi posted in the next few days. I don't know that it offers much advice, but it will give you some insights.
Personally? I think you just need to figure out if this is the right time, and decide if they really do need to know. I'm not suggesting you be closeted, but sometimes not everyone needs to know everything.
Good luck!

[Herbwoman39]

I haven't told my parents yet either and I've been out to myself for going on 2 years now :(

However, there is an excellent book I can suggest that gives instruction on how to come out to your friends and family. It's called "Outing Yourself" by Michelangelo Signorile and though it's primarily written for lesbians and gays, it does mention us Bi folk too :)

Biggest thing I can stress (because I botched this part myself) is that before you say anything, assure your family that you are perfectly healthy and that there is nothing wrong. In fact, this is something you're happy about.

Good luck

[Philbert]

i think my mum suspects anyway, as after one jokey remark i made was responded to with a very serious "whatever you do be bloody careful". i'll just have to wait for the right time i guess.

[Reprob8]

I told my mom and got almost no response and she told somone else that even if it was true I would never have the nerve to act on it. The fact that she is bisexual hasn't improved her empathy but everyone handles it differently. I would never tell my father, He regurgitates every conservative talking point like it was his own idea, sad because I know he is smarter than that. I guess the point to my bitching is don't come out unless it is something that can actually be shared with mutual respect and love. If you KNOW that the reaction will be mutually unsatisfactroy then why put yourself and them through it.

[deletetacount123]

My parents don't really know....
My dad's not allowed to say anything if he disapproves cause HE'S the one that rented me 3 movies in the past that had to do with lesbian love stories (Im not sure he even knew what they were about lol one was "But I'm a Cheerleader!!").

My mom has mixed feelings and I often joked to her I was gonna date a women or going as far as to say "Im not eating anything that looks like a penis, ewww" lol (those bratwurts (sp.. its the big whiteish susages people BBQ) which I made the remark to and got a nasty look lol But Mom then got serious one day "Whatever you do, I just want you to be careful and happy... a lot of girls pretend they are gay when they aren't." ok, I know that.....

But If I did date a woman, my parents will NOT know this till they have met her, see she makes me happy then if they start to assume we're more than just friends.... thats fine. :-) I have a gay brother so they have no right to say I can't be a lesbian hehe (which Im starting to think I am than Bisexual lol and a little poll i did with some of the members on here told me so too hehe)

Oh well :-) In my parents view they just want me to be happy... BUT cause I have been hurt by people in the past, they are just being protective of who I date or even be friends with.

If they see me happy with a woman and in love with her, they will be happy with me then..... but the girl will get the same "you better not hurt her or else" treatment that they gave the so called bfs I dated hehe

Tasha

[tink1978]

My parents have been divorced for about 20 years so I had to say it twice. When I told my dad (who I did not grow up with) he said "I have know for years, but thanks for telling me." I was kinda shocked but it was cool. My mom said she had the Idea for a while but was hoping it was just something I was going through and would grow out of. guess not mom.

My only advice is don't tell just to tell if you are afraid, as I was, that someone else would say something then tell but don't do it just because.


:2cents:

[Tynary]

My mum is so cool. well no start again. My mum is ok with gays, bis and lesbians and transexuals ect. she'd lv me no matter what and be proud of me no matter what my sexuality. Because of my occaisionally eccentric or experimental or wild or whatever you want to call it personnality she is not surprised my sexuality. She thinks it is irrelevant till I've had a few more relationships with both sexes but does not doubt what I am and incourages me to have relationships with both men and women. I was always iterested in gay issues before I was even aware I was anything but straight. As soon I heard about other sexualities (young) I liked the idea. I thought the idea of two people of the opposite sex having a romantic relationship or opposite sex couples was adorable and I expressed my views and stood up for GLBTs at every opertunity. I told my mum I was bi in a long conversation that started as me asking Qs then chatting about that stuff then me just saying it. she wasn't surprised and didn't mind. Do it like that (I'd been dropping hints for yrs) so she knew.

[Philbert]

well, i told them today, and they were fine about it, my mum said as long as i'm happy and safe then she's happy as well, my step dad said basically the same thing, so alls good here. thanks everyone