Confusion

[veridian]

There are many things I find confusing about being bi.

I am one who is attracted equally to both sexes....

It gets a bit annoying when you are out on the town... do I have to do a coin flip to work out what sex I am going to focus my attention on?

And then my friends make me feel more confused... If I have relations with more than 2 of the same sex in a row I am classified as either hetro or homo. :(

Does this annoy anyone else? It is very confusing being bi. :eek:

[The gentle one]

There really should be no confusion being Bi sexual. Whether you are sexually attracted to the person is all that matters not what sex they are. When you go out to have a good time just keep your mind open to both sexes and go with the flow. It does not matter how many men and how many women and what orders you see them to determine anything just keep it safe when you play the field.

The gentle one.

[Aleksandra]

I agree with The Gentle One.
Because surrounding everywhere did get used on just being hetero or homo, totaly reject the fact that there is one more category of ppl: Bisexuals.

It's easy to point finger at someone and just say "he is homo" or "he is striaght", and maybe that make some confusion in surrounding, but my advice is just go with clear mind into all this and you will have a great, wonderful fun in every sence.

[DiamondDog]

Here's how you don't get confused.
you don't give a FUCK what others think about you.
This might seem harsh but that's how I do it.

sexual orientation labels are just that, labels, and confining ones at that.
They're a 19th/20th century social invention.

"Bi" and "pansexual", can describe my actions/attractions; but I think of myself as being sexual, and as myself, not as "gay", "het", or "bi".

Many monosexuals seem to see sexuality in binary terms when it's not that way.

For the most part I'm attracted to the person for reasons other than their gender.

[EludedSunshine]

Here's how you don't get confused.
you don't give a FUCK what others think about you.
This might seem harsh but that's how I do it.

Gotta go with that.

I'm sorry that others make you feel confused, but since when do other people know the first damned thing about how you feel? :tong: The stereotypes are their problem, not yours. Please don't let it get to you. Go with your own feelings and to hell with what anyone else's interpretation of your feelings are.

As for working out who to focus your attention on... Why choose one or the other? :bigrin:

[Tynary]

I know how you feel. I'm very confused about my sexuality especially since I'm so young and people and friends upset me about it and I really care what people think of me so I know how you feel. I like girls and guys equally sometimes I like one more than the other on certain days. I've had two girlfriends and no boyfriend but I know I like boys. Gender doesn't matter to me. All gender are beautiful and sexy in their own way. I often thing I'm probably pansexual but thats too complex for my brain.
I think the confusion fades as you get more experience with other people and knowing yourself. For now just take comfort in the fact that you are not alone in your confusion.

[Herbwoman39]

Oh but that's one of the wonderful things about being Bi hon. You don't HAVE to choose! Just let yourself be attracted to whoever happens to walk by :-)
We're SO lucky because we don't have to live in a "this OR that" kind of world. We can choose "this AND that"! We can literally have our cake and eat her...uhm him...err..it, yeah IT too ;-)

"And then my friends make me feel more confused... If I have relations with more than 2 of the same sex in a row I am classified as either hetro or homo."

I'm gonna be as blunt as DiamondDog for a moment. These people are NOT your friends if they are making you feel bad about yourself. If they feel the need to confine you by labeling you, they are not your friends. A friend is someone who loves you for who you are. If it matters to them who you sleep with, they're NOT your friends. Find people in your life who accept you for who you are. Like us :-)

I'd also like to suggest you get a copy of "Bi Any Other Name". It's an excellent anthology and really helped me realize that I'm not alone. Course i read that before i found these wonderful folks and now i really KNOW I'm not alone :-)

[neveen]

ur friends r just serioulsy jealous of how lucky u r to not have any boundries who u can find attractive and enjoy...enjoy what u have, secretly they prolly wish they didn't have silly limitations like they do....so, flaunt it, grab both sex's ass' at the same time :bigrin:

[12voltman59]

I do really hate --in all its forms---the all or nothing way we crazy ass human beings seem to think about things--that things are always "either/or" 'black and white"

If you just pay attention to life--very few things are black and white in spite of our desire for that to be so--most things in the universe are some shade of grey---

I think those who like to think things are always "either/or" simply don't want to think-they just want things to be simple and clear---they don't like ambiguity....

[taz67156]

I think if your attracted to both sexes then don't worry about what your friends think when your out on the town and looking just go out there looking for both cause you never know what you might get it could be either one going home with you or both sexes going with you just as long as you have alot of fun looking.

Life is to short to care what others think about your sexuality live it to its fullest each days.

taz67156