Why does male bisexuality freak women out?

[ghmutt1986]

Have you ever noticed if a woman comes out as bisexual most men think they hit the sexual lotto. If a man confesses to his wife that he is bisexual in most cases the woman freak out. Women please help me to understand the thought process. Thanks.

[pole_smoker]

No it's not like this with all women. Both my partner and myself had relationships with women before, and we were out to them, and they were intrigued by our bisexuality, and they did not freak out or it did not end our relationships with women.

[JaredT77]

Yup too true for men thinking they hit the sex lotto.

There are women out there that do love guy on guy sex. My fiancee is turned on by it after she met me. My first experience telling a woman that I was dating that I was bisexual was her dumping me. She told me that if her and I continued dating then she would not only worry about me cheating on her with women but with men too. Then she told me to never tell another soul again and take it to my grave. I just moved on and told women before we started dating that I was bisexual. It works out for me that way better.

Honestly, I think when a man doesn't tell his wife that he is bisexual, it's like withholding personal information that she should know. Everybody knows or should know that when you have sex with a person, you are having sex with all the people they have had sex with. A man wants to know how many men have fucked his wife before him. It should be a double standard of a woman knows who her husband has had sex with before her.

I don't blame a wife getting freaked out. Not telling your wife is the same as not telling your wife the truth.

How would you feel if your wife had sex with someone with STDs or HIV but didn't tell you until after you were married? Would you not feel betrayed?

[BiFiHotspot]

I think it just freaks out the ones who are really not secure in themselves or their realationships and/or the ones who are too closeminded to accept their partners feelings and desires.

[PeninAZ]

Well first, if a man confesses to his WIFE, that stands as a possible threat to their monogamous relationship. Outside marriage situations, women freaked might be thinking where that cock has been. Even as a guy who'd like to fuck anal, even I am mildly uncomfortable with the idea that the same place I'd "go in" is the same place from which feces "goes out." Jealousy may be involved in some cases, "can a MAN make HIM happier than me?" Note that I'm speaking on a subconscious level. Could be a number of things. Ladies, any insight?

[darkeyes]

Have you ever noticed if a woman comes out as bisexual most men think they hit the sexual lotto. If a man confesses to his wife that he is bisexual in most cases the woman freak out. Women please help me to understand the thought process. Thanks.
I'm afraid men have millennia of prejudice and disgust to undo which women being gay or bisexual dont... the anal thing has much to do with it but that isnt quite the whole story.. it is getting better for men in much of what we think of as the developed world but there remains a long way to go before they can be as sexually gay or bi with as much ease as women...

The anal thing btw is interesting and the fact that anal sex between men and women is on the increase and becoming more acceptable and for that matter between even women and women kinda undermines that disgust....

..it isnt all plain sailing for women and much prejudice remains but being made sexual objects and the thought of 2 or more of us together getting men off and/or having man as piggie in middle has made it easier... it is as it has been for millennia... a man's world...arguably less so now in parts of the developed world but still a man's world nonetheless... and women for good or ill are in so many ways still influenced by the prejudicial attitudes of that male dominated world often to the detriment of their own rights and standing in the world as much as to the detriment of gay and bisexual men... women are also objectified and treated less than they should be whatever our sexuality and arguably (in my view that argument is won) that makes things as difficult for us in different ways as the prejudice aimed at gay and bisexual men..

... shitty ole world, hey? But be of good cheer.. the young seem to be much less repressed sexually if we listen to what they say.. so there is hope forya.. fingies x'd:)

[Ja&Ve]

Wow, I come back after a few months and and serious thread. How quaint... :D Well, speaking as a married hetero woman to a bi-curious man, its like this. 9 times out of 10, you are not honest with yourselves, much less your spouse up front a lot of times. And by the time you finally confess, you've already cheated, or have gone along so far in your fantasies that you want to act on them. And that is already massively devastating and trust is destroyed. The absolute vast majority of women do not want to share their men with another woman, much less another man. We don't usually have issue with the fact you're bi, but we want to be able to be able to have a say in whether or not we decide to marry someone who is, especially if monogamy is a priority to me and it may or may not be to you. Lying by omission is still lying and I detest liars. Plus a lot of bi men see women for "romance and intimacy" and guys for "raw animal sex". Well guess what, I see you for both, and I want both, and dammit you need to be able to give me your all. Plus sexually, I want to know that all of your needs are met and that I can meet them. I dont care how much you love me, if you prefer sex with men, you're outta here. I want you to prefer sex with me above everything else. And if I have to go around in this perpetual state of feeling inadequate because I can't meet your need to be in the arms (or crotch) of a guy once in a while, then its going to slowly destroy me, and I just might take you with me. I'm lucky, my husband has no desire to act on any of his urges. He says he has built his life around and loves me dearly, and I provide all the satisfaction he needs and he works damn hard to keep me satisfied. But he knows that if that changes and his feelings start to alter, then we may very well be over. I absolutely refuse to play second fiddle to any other desires he may have. He has and I have accepted this. And who knows? Maybe some bi swinging down the road with trustworthy folk. Right now, he is dead set against it ( he doesn't like risk anyway), but there will never ever be one on one with another man allowed. An no gay men ever. Those are my hard limits.

[Melody Dean]

I'm afraid men have millennia of prejudice and disgust to undo which women being gay or bisexual dont... the anal thing has much to do with it but that isnt quite the whole story.. it is getting better for men in much of what we think of as the developed world but there remains a long way to go before they can be as sexually gay or bi with as much ease as women...

The anal thing btw is interesting and the fact that anal sex between men and women is on the increase and becoming more acceptable and for that matter between even women and women kinda undermines that disgust....

..it isnt all plain sailing for women and much prejudice remains but being made sexual objects and the thought of 2 or more of us together getting men off and/or having man as piggie in middle has made it easier... it is as it has been for millennia... a man's world...arguably less so now in parts of the developed world but still a man's world nonetheless... and women for good or ill are in so many ways still influenced by the prejudicial attitudes of that male dominated world often to the detriment of their own rights and standing in the world as much as to the detriment of gay and bisexual men... women are also objectified and treated less than they should be whatever our sexuality and arguably (in my view that argument is won) that makes things as difficult for us in different ways as the prejudice aimed at gay and bisexual men..

... shitty ole world, hey? But be of good cheer.. the young seem to be much less repressed sexually if we listen to what they say.. so there is hope forya.. fingies x'd:)

^ This.

I do think there's a difference between women being freaked out by male bisexuality, and wives being freaked out when their husbands come out to them. In the second case, I wish there were more relationships where couples could trust each other entirely to feel comfortable sharing new or hidden discoveries about themselves with each other.

And to any single folks who know they are bi, tell your potential dates early on, it's just easier that way. Plus, would you really want to be with someone who didn't accept you for who you are?

[Fzmr9t]

For me, I think it's because women have always had the freedom to be sensitive and nurturing and caring. So to see them holding hands, in public was never an issue. Kissing, as long as it wasn't done in a sensual way was also not an issue. Also, for men, seeing two women together, has always been, I think, very sensual and erotic. So while men would outwardly be disgusted, inwardly they'd wish to be involved.
men, on the other hand were the stoic, hard, breadwinner-protector figures, and showing any kind of sensitivity (although women say they like it) or emotion made them that much less of a man. I know this sounds like 'turn of the century' mentality, but really, how far have we progressed?

[NjbiGuy01]

Clearly a double standard with woman and the populous in general it seems. While two girls kissing or having sex is "hot" to many, two men doing it is "gross" or "queer"....It's weird. I find it more amazing that many bi woman I have met say that bi-men didn't turn them on or precluded a couple from playing with a bi man....weird that she could be bi, but not be open or accepting to a man or men in the same situation. I have an ex who knows I'm bi. She's comfortable with it to the point of saying that had we married she "would be okay with me having a male friend because it's something I can't give you"...woah. She also mentioned she had a fantasy of two men making love to her in bed. Now, figure this: her sister is out and totally gay. It freaks my friend out to play with a MF couple in a threesome with a woman !! In-fact I had found a couple of men she was open to have join us, but a couple with a woman was a no-way....I assume maybe she fears she might like it or may be be turned gay) ?? It's just odd to me on a cerebral level that there is this inequity of bi or gay men vs woman....from both sides...

[Neonaught]

I have to agree with that. We have been married almost 30 years now but I did not tell her until 12 years ago and that was a good decision for several reasons. For the most part there was nothing happening to "confess" to and she was definitely not secure enough back then to be able to deal with it. To my surprise and delight it turned out she was bi too!

[Neonaught]

I think it just freaks out the ones who are really not secure in themselves or their realationships and/or the ones who are too closeminded to accept their partners feelings and desires.

Sorry forgot the quote above!

I have to agree with that. We have been married almost 30 years now but I did not tell her until 12 years ago and that was a good decision for several reasons. For the most part there was nothing happening to "confess" to and she was definitely not secure enough back then to be able to deal with it. To my surprise and delight it turned out she was bi too!

[BiFiHotspot]

Sorry forgot the quote above!

I have to agree with that. We have been married almost 30 years now but I did not tell her until 12 years ago and that was a good decision for several reasons. For the most part there was nothing happening to "confess" to and she was definitely not secure enough back then to be able to deal with it. To my surprise and delight it turned out she was bi too!

Yes so we need to really appreciate the rare women who are aroused by male/male interaction and encourage it.

[Wizzee]

Today's society is full of double standards. If a group of people is out on the town, and one of the ladies says she has to go "powder her nose" Some or most of the other ladies go to the rest room with her. Perfectly normal, and socially acceptable. But if you reverse the roles, and a guy gets up to go, and several others stand up to go also, things get a little testy. But it is the same thing in other areas, like working in a nursery, for instance. We feel it is perfectly normal for an unknown lady to see and care for little tots going to the toilet, regardless as to whether the child is a boy or a girl. If, on the other hand, there is a man working in the nursery, like in your church, for instance, most parents would have a shit hemorrhage over the idea of a man seeing their little one half naked and cleaning them when changing a diaper. And like some of you others have said, in society, it is fairly acceptable for two ladies to enjoy each other physically, but most folks will freak out over the sight of two men in a clinch, clothed or not.

Humans are weirdly wired wonders...

[void()]

If, on the other hand, there is a man working in the nursery, like in your church, for instance, most parents would have a shit hemorrhage over the idea of a man seeing their little one half naked and cleaning them when changing a diaper. And like some of you others have said, in society, it is fairly acceptable for two ladies to enjoy each other physically, but most folks will freak out over the sight of two men in a clinch, clothed or not.

Humans are weirdly wired wonders...

Maybe not exactly same notion here. Grew up changing my brothers' diapers. Mom used cloth diapers for a long while. She finally opted for the plastic disposables, realizing the safety pins may not have always been safe. Also changed nephews a few times. My brothers grew up, one married, one had a kid with a girlfriend. Both their kids were girls. The one girl when she was around four to six, would continually invite me to come to the bathroom with her.

"I might need help, uncle XXXXX. You need to come in with me."

"Honey, I'll go get your Nanny, or Mommy. Uncle XXXXXX is not wired to help little girls."

"Well, huh. My daddy is and he says you ought to be too."

"Well, he's your daddy honey and that makes it okay. I'm your uncle and some people might fuss."

"Oh pickles to them!"

My mom one day caught the tail end of one such conversation. Her response, "you go on in there and help her. I'll be out here if she needs me instead. Don't think she will, go on now."

Within family I find acceptance up to a point. Both my nephews are older now. Both have an idea their uncle might be a bit more than normal. Both are also aware I have no intent upon ever harming them, save to maybe ring their necks or whoop their butts if they get out of line. It would really kill me if ever that were an accusation. It would be patently false. Still once there, never to fade. Ergo, I keep low profile, stay respectful.

[elian]

Yeah, but that was the cool thing about your mom, because at least as much as I could see, she was level headed about things like that.



"Oh pickles to them!"

My mom one day caught the tail end of one such conversation. Her response, "you go on in there and help her. I'll be out here if she needs me instead. Don't think she will, go on now."


I remember being freaked out when I held my niece for the first or second time - kept thinking I was going to break her, or she was going to fuss and I wouldn't be able to figure out how to help her. It's a lot of social conditioning. Good thing we don't have to do all of this stuff alone eh? Other people have valuable experience.

I am amazed by a few of the statements I hear society make about women, I mean there is the whole hip-hop culture that refers to women as bi*ch.. which I think is just wrong. But also I know some men (especially gay ones) who seem jealous that society thinks it is doing women a favor by "protecting" them more..being more courteous to women, etc.

I have a mixed up jumble of feelings about all of this stuff - I am very confident in a lot of areas of my life but relationships with others isn't one of them.

There are times when I feel obviously male, and other times I feel rather .. androgynous .. for better or worse. I'm not always willing to admit that to dates in real life.

[tenni]

I agree with Ja & V (post 7) to some extent but see it slightly differently…lol


“its like this. 9 times out of 10, you are not honest with yourselves, much less your spouse up front a lot of times.”


Bi men are not trained to acknowledge and accept their same sex attraction with equal value as their attraction to opposite gender. Instead both men and women are trained to honour monogamy and opposite gender attraction only. As others have posted there is a huge negative bigotry and bias against men having sex with each other and still wanting sex with a woman. It is ok to be gay as women can see you as a non threatening friend girlfriend style and not a guy who wants to get into women's pants too. It confuses monosexuals....lol Society does not make it easy for male bisexuals to come to terms with their sexuality.


“especially if monogamy is a priority to me and it may or may not be to you.”
I agree. Men tend not value monogamy as much as women do. This is a huge issue why women get upset with bimen wanting to “play” with other men as if it is a golf or basketball game. Some bi guys see same sex play as just play while having sex with another woman a completely different issue.


The issue is why do women have this strange jealous obsession with only one person having sex with them? It may be rooted in centuries of seeing sex not as recreational like a golf game but the procreation aspect.

[pole_smoker]

I agree with Ja & V (post 7) to some extent but see it slightly differently…lol


“its like this. 9 times out of 10, you are not honest with yourselves, much less your spouse up front a lot of times.”


Bi men are not trained to acknowledge and accept their same sex attraction with equal value as their attraction to opposite gender. Instead both men and women are trained to honour monogamy and opposite gender attraction only. As others have posted there is a huge negative bigotry and bias against men having sex with each other and still wanting sex with a woman. It is ok to be gay as women can see you as a non threatening friend girlfriend style and not a guy who wants to get into women's pants too. It confuses monosexuals....lol Society does not make it easy for male bisexuals to come to terms with their sexuality.


“especially if monogamy is a priority to me and it may or may not be to you.”
I agree. Men tend not value monogamy as much as women do. This is a huge issue why women get upset with bimen wanting to “play” with other men as if it is a golf or basketball game. Some bi guys see same sex play as just play while having sex with another woman a completely different issue.


The issue is why do women have this strange jealous obsession with only one person having sex with them? It may be rooted in centuries of seeing sex not as recreational like a golf game but the procreation aspect.
Typical BS professional victim responses, and a blanket all/most statement about an entire gender of a sexuality, and even more hate and blaming women as usual...but let's consider the source. ;) :rolleyes:

No not all or even most bisexual men view sex with men as "play" or purely recreational sex the way you do, or equate sex with playing sports as though they're playing golf or basketball. Secondly, not all women have "a strange jealous obsession with only one person having sex with them."

Who cares about society? Besides you of course. If you worry way too much about society, or what society thinks of you as a bisexual person, or LGT person, or even if you're heterosexual and worry about what society thinks about you and your sexuality I feel bad for you.

Heterosexual people, gays and lesbians already know about bisexuality and have since the late 60s and for sure by the early 70s. It's also like this in the non-Western world as well even if it's not always talked about or as open as it is here in the Western world.

[elian]

The issue is why do women have this strange jealous obsession with only one person having sex with them? It may be rooted in centuries of seeing sex not as recreational like a golf game but the procreation aspect.

Maybe because since women can bear children, when a woman thinks of having sex she has fears or other motivations besides just feeling good? It is one reason that I was taught to be more respectful to women. Up until about the 70's women were not always working. Even now, if both partners are working things are still expensive enough for some households that a stable relationship is also beneficial for financial survival.

I don't have a high opinion of men who have had sex with as many partners as possible but in general the stereotype is that if such knowledge becomes public he might be considered virile - whereas a woman who has sex with multiple partners - if it were to become public knowledge she would be shamed.

At least that's the way we thought in high school, I don't know if adults really think that way in 2015..

I try to be respectful of not just women, but other people in general, because frankly I really don't know what it is like to walk in anyone else's shoes but my own. However I am human, and also not a doormat.

[elian]

Won't even talk about massive self esteem issued faced by many people in our society. Marketers just love those..I mean if you didn't think there was anything wrong with you, why would you want to purchase any of their meaningless crap?

[BiFiHotspot]

Maybe we are the persecuted mutants of our society ? Anyone care to put on spandex and join me to fight for a world that fears us?
32847

[JaredT77]

Maybe we are the persecuted mutants of our society ? Anyone care to put on spandex and join me to fight for a world that fears us?
32847

BiFiHotspot, I hate to have to inform you but Wolverine is dead.

[BiFiHotspot]

Cashcows have a funny way of resurrecting themselves.3285132852

[JaredT77]

Cashcows have a funny way of resurrecting themselves.3285132852

Touche'

[pole_smoker]

Maybe we are the persecuted mutants of our society ?
No we're not. It was like this decades ago; but now? Not anymore.

[tenni]

Maybe because since women can bear children, when a woman thinks of having sex she has fears or other motivations besides just feeling good? It is one reason that I was taught to be more respectful to women. Up until about the 70's women were not always working. Even now, if both partners are working things are still expensive enough for some households that a stable relationship is also beneficial for financial survival.

I don't have a high opinion of men who have had sex with as many partners as possible but in general the stereotype is that if such knowledge becomes public he might be considered virile - whereas a woman who has sex with multiple partners - if it were to become public knowledge she would be shamed.

At least that's the way we thought in high school, I don't know if adults really think that way in 2015..

I try to be respectful of not just women, but other people in general, because frankly I really don't know what it is like to walk in anyone else's shoes but my own. However I am human, and also not a doormat.

Elian
Definitely, what you say about women bearing children has truth in it. That is part of the centuries of mate selection theory. Traditionally, the guy spreading his seeds as wide and often was the biological explanation and is seem in other animals. So, it is not quite a stereotype but biologically deeply ingrained with strong social upbringing that good girls want to find a man who will take care of her and the children. Some argue that is not how things are today and that has truth in it as well. Single parents with children are still more frequently the woman with the children. We can be as respectful as we want but there are still a lot of ingrained beliefs in our minds. Still jealousy seems to play a role with women and bi men. That is not to say that men are not jealous of their female partners attracting other men. That ties back in with our ancestral heritage. Sex as a recreational activity is present today but old habits do not go away over night. Monogamy is un natural in the animal world in most species and even those who appear monogamous have been found to finding a piece discretely on the side. Bisexual men may be thought not only as more promiscuous than hetero men but many biguys just want dick and not another woman as much as women fear.

[pole_smoker]

Bisexual men may be thought not only as more promiscuous than hetero men but many biguys just want dick and not another woman as much as women fear.

Stop living in the past and having the "bisexuals are professional victims" attitude.

Unless you've talked to every single bisexual man-which you haven't-you can't claim that "many or most" bisexual men want dick and not another woman, or that most bisexual men don't want a relationship or partnership with a man, bisexuality is different in everyone and it's not an "all", "Most", or "many" type thing for either gender, all open relationships are different, and a lot of people do cheat even if they're already in an open relationship with a wife/husband/partner.

[BiFiHotspot]

Maybe its the fangs,claws,and prehensile tails? Err..what?..Nobody else??

[elian]

..ok so if you want to talk about natural selection, maybe I'm an aberration - because to be honest - I would much rather share pleasure with another male or female than bash their head in with a rock. From the way I was raised and what I saw anger do to the people I loved I much prefer cooperation rather than aggression - as a matter of fact I will typically go waay out of my way to avoid a confrontation with someone else who I respect.

As much as we are being told to stoke our own egos I think our ancestors learned a long time ago that cooperation gives us an advantage. I was a very angry teen, but the reality is I literally could not have survived without the kindness and compassion of other people.

The thought of another person hurting someone I love is almost too much to bear.

I like children, but I don't know if I will ever raise my own, I knew I was different from the start - and therefore held off on getting married or fathering a child. I'm not really proud or happy about that but it is what it is.. I think that in some ways nature plans things out beyond what we can comprehend in the short term.

Maybe I should just let the other posts say what I can't seem to say in less than 1000 words.

You can either dwell in pain, or not - if you know the stove is hot, why do you keep putting your hand back on the stove? Hopefully some day there comes to be a point where we can all say, "I'm just not going to do that any more" - just be present.. You and I might agree that some rational thought would be helpful, but we cannot change other folks, only ourselves..so it is sort of irrelevant.

Or is that just it, the conclusion doesn't really matter, you would much rather see our thought process. Well I guess in that case I can say that everything in this world happens for a reason, I suppose we all have a part to play.

It never actually finishes, does it? You never really get the answer you are looking for.. What would you like us to say? I value you as a human being..without trying to be condescending.. Does that help?

You are entitled to your own thoughts and opinions and for once I won't dispute that. I don't know you, I don't know what you've been through, and it's not my place to tell you anything about how to run your own life..so I won't.

..sorry my ego is getting in the way of the only sane response.

[oldoralman]

It doesn't seem to bother my wife too bad. I enjoy who I want as long as she does not have to participate or watch.

[Ja&Ve]

I agree with Ja & V (post 7) to some extent but see it slightly differently…lol


“its like this. 9 times out of 10, you are not honest with yourselves, much less your spouse up front a lot of times.”


Bi men are not trained to acknowledge and accept their same sex attraction with equal value as their attraction to opposite gender. Instead both men and women are trained to honour monogamy and opposite gender attraction only. As others have posted there is a huge negative bigotry and bias against men having sex with each other and still wanting sex with a woman. It is ok to be gay as women can see you as a non threatening friend girlfriend style and not a guy who wants to get into women's pants too. It confuses monosexuals....lol Society does not make it easy for male bisexuals to come to terms with their sexuality.


“especially if monogamy is a priority to me and it may or may not be to you.”
I agree. Men tend not value monogamy as much as women do. This is a huge issue why women get upset with bimen wanting to “play” with other men as if it is a golf or basketball game. Some bi guys see same sex play as just play while having sex with another woman a completely different issue.


The issue is why do women have this strange jealous obsession with only one person having sex with them? It may be rooted in centuries of seeing sex not as recreational like a golf game but the procreation aspect.

its an interesting conundrum to be sure. Interestingly enough, a poll of straight gay, lesbian andbisexual people was done asking if an emotional affair or a sexual affair was worse. Everyone, in general said the emotional affair was worse, with the exception of the straight men. They indicated a sexual affair was worse, so who knows? Women are not the only ones limited to possession issues, to be sure.

I would have issue with a sexual affair primarily because I know my husband and he admits he would not be able to go out and have sex "recreationally" and that he would get emotionally attached. And that takes time and energy away from the relationship he has with me. And mepersonally? I need to feel safe secured loved and cherished.

As an interesting flip side? We talked about a poly triad relationship academically and agreed that if we ever wanted to go the poly route, that this be the ONLY option, that way the love and affection for all parties would be equal. I would have two men love and cherish me, my husband would have a man and woman to love and cherish him, and our other partner would have another man and woman to cherish him. I couldn't bring in a third without that. It wouldn't be fair to our third, to me or my husband. My husband and I have a love and passion for each other that is insane in its intensity. It would take an extraordinary individual to match up to that. Sex is not golf or basketball. It's an act with consequences, disease risk, bonding, passion, children and a whole lot of other factors that neither I nor my husband take lightly.

[NjbiGuy01]

Very good point about "emotion" as a factor. I stumbled across an ex on the internet. We met for coffee and eventually began an affair lasting a couple of years. I really hate affairs generally. I do love playing with a man, woman or couple. I would like to be friends and care about one another, but not into a "relationship".....So, I'm not unhappy in my 30 year marriage. I have two great kids, my wife and I own a growing business, and we have a decent (albeit not fabulous) sex life. The problem with affairs is the emotion ! My ex and I met regularly for dinner and a few hours in a hot tub and bed. There was excitement to it and the sense of it being so bad and dirty and on the DL.....It was great until the both of us started falling in love again.

Her home situation is very poor. Her and hubby don't make a ton of money, are buried in debt, have an upside down mortgage and the husband is (so I am told) is " very poorly endowed" (I'm no porn star, average 6" at best, he's 2 to 3 inches !) and even worse: they have gone through therapy because he simply can't have sex with her ! She's "too much like his mother than like his wife" and thus he rarely can get it up. Separate bedrooms, the whole deal.... Our sex was always great when we dated. The first time we got together she had not had sex in five years and she had orgasms that soaked the bed and made her quiver, scream, cry and sweat. Every emotion you could imagine can whipping through her. Man, I'm ok in bed but I was knocked out by what happened....eventually she started talking about "what if we left our spouses and started over someplace !?". She accepts me as bisexual even said she would allow me to have a male lover since "she can't give me that" and that she would love to be in bed with two men making love to her...and it would be okay if they played together as well. Talk about blowing my mind.....

While it's exciting initially, I don't want to disrupt 30 years of life to start over, hurt my wife, lose my business and although it might be less of a gamble had we not already shared a relationship and almost married in the past, I could not do it...

Of course, after that discussion she no longer wanted to meet and play, not even for dinner nor talking on the phone. It was too painful. I totally get that. While I love sharing friendship and not really a fan of emotionless sex, this was the complete opposite and it wasn't good for either of us. I felt horrid that I once again hurt her (I stopped our initial relationship 35 years ago over lots of reasons, some valid some not)...so she was once again hurt by me....emotions sigh....so powerful.

[tenni]

Ve
“Sex is not golf or basketball. It's an act with consequences, disease risk, bonding, passion, children and a whole lot of other factors that neither I nor my husband take lightly.”


I understand that position but according to my own research some men do not see it the way that you do. I think that when emotion enters the “game” it changes things for men. I found it fascinating that the research that you found gave the opposite about straight men..however, my research has biguys as the control factor and not heterosexual men. There are formal studies and discourse that I recall do refer to men as being capable of non emotional sex at a greater rate than women. Social norms may be changing though.


I think that your points about bonding is a very valid factor. Hook ups do not bond regardless of the gender. Passion is possible without bonding for me and other sensual men. Admittedly, when emotion is added I think your position get stronger.

[Ja&Ve]

Ve
“Sex is not golf or basketball. It's an act with consequences, disease risk, bonding, passion, children and a whole lot of other factors that neither I nor my husband take lightly.”


I understand that position but according to my own research some men do not see it the way that you do. I think that when emotion enters the “game” it changes things for men. I found it fascinating that the research that you found gave the opposite about straight men..however, my research has biguys as the control factor and not heterosexual men. There are formal studies and discourse that I recall do refer to men as being capable of non emotional sex at a greater rate than women. Social norms may be changing though.


I think that your points about bonding is a very valid factor. Hook ups do not bond regardless of the gender. Passion is possible without bonding for me and other sensual men. Admittedly, when emotion is added I think your position get stronger.



Yeah, some folk can keep the emotion of love out of the equation, but in listening to most guys here, but the other emotions, not so much, the lust, the passion, the preference and sometimes the addiction. Those emotions do take away from an existing relationship. And if that's ok with all parties, then hey, go for it. But me personally I want those directed to my relationship, to make our bonds stronger. They say that the grass is only greener on the other side of the fence if you don't bother to water your own lawn. And I want my lawn watered well and often.

[married2bif]

Why do you think it freaks out women? I am straight but both my wife and her girlfriend want to watch me perform oral on a guy. The girlfriend would join in as she is married to a bisexual cuckold but my wife wants no part of other men. I am lucky that she has sex with me but no penetration. :)

[Christine76]

Perhaps offer to fulfill that fantasy of hers in exchange for her trying things with the other couple namely the man, dont know much about your wife but how could it hurt?, btw straight is really subjective, and who knows you might actually likle it.

[Hypersexual11]

My wife said she is freaked out by it because it makes it impossible for her to be 'my everything', to be able to satisfy my every sexual desire. She actually said out loud a few weeks ago that she wishes she had been born a hermaphrodite. That's some fucked up shit right there.

[Ja&Ve]

My wife said she is freaked out by it because it makes it impossible for her to be 'my everything', to be able to satisfy my every sexual desire. She actually said out loud a few weeks ago that she wishes she had been born a hermaphrodite. That's some fucked up shit right there.


I can relate. I feel the exact same way. :( I don't want to have to share. I want to be the one to satisfy your every desire. It absolutely kills me that I likely cannot and that I will likely someday have to share. It makes me feel inadequate.

[AGuyIKnow]

Sexuality would be much easier if everyone was born a hermaphrodite.

[elian]

I don't know, because I don't have one right now but a wife with a strap on might be kind of fun.

[Sassy Love]

Maybe because, we know we cannot truly satisfy him the way he needs to satisfied the way a man can do it.Maybe because deep down, we all know that dick is more powerful than a vagina is, and can give great pleasure. And some of us are okay with that.Or simply maybe because seeing, or even thinking about a man being with a another man grosses them out.Or it makes them see men as weak.Even with me being bisexual, I will admit I cannot date a bisexual man. I like for men to be my ideal type of men.And bisexual men do not fit that mold.

[tenni]

Or simply maybe because seeing, or even thinking about a man being with a another man grosses them out.Or it makes them see men as weak.Even with me being bisexual, I will admit I cannot date a bisexual man. I like for men to be my ideal type of men.And bisexual men do not fit that mold.

I think that Sassy has hit a very important nail on the head. Even for bisexual women biphobia hits hardest against bisexual men. This is a fact and not crying victim. It is also in part due to the Patriarchal structure of society. Feminist fight the Patriarchy by pointing out issues that impact women. Homosexuals deal with the Patriarchy as it impacts them. Bisexuals do not deal with the Patriarchy with issues that impact them very well.

[wifekinky4husband]

Yup too true for men thinking they hit the sex lotto.

There are women out there that do love guy on guy sex. My fiancée is turned on by it after she met me.

I just moved on and told women before we started dating that I was bisexual. It works out for me that way better.

I don't blame a wife getting freaked out. Not telling your wife is the same as not telling your wife the truth.

How would you feel if your wife had sex with someone with STDs or HIV but didn't tell you until after you were married? Would you not feel betrayed?

Well I am one of those females! I love it. Never really cared or thought about it begin gay, bisexual, whatever. Saw it, thought it was hot, and loved masturbating to it. I was exposed to it on college, thought it was quite intriguing, pursued it here and there, then sort of forgot about it.

I agree 100% with Jared - everyone in a relationship, especially a marriage, should always be UPFRONT about everything. It saves a lot of heartache and hardship.

Even though it is tough as time changes your desires, one should keep their mate well informed. I have always been upfront about my crazy desires as they develop. Looking back not only would my husband tell you but I would as well, we would have never imagined I’d want to see him with males let alone females. He would have ran/ I would have ran.

I understand also where people are coming from with regards to not being able to fulfill their mate 100% in all areas but that is simply an impossibility. There is no one human who could do that unless you and that person are 100% on the same page. Hence the dilemma of where fantasies and reality cross. I believe you need both. For me, I merely tried some role play I thought would be creative and fun. Over time it morphed into more. Latent desires from my college years resurfaced which lead to more risqué & adventurous RP.

[wifekinky4husband]

Why do you think it freaks out women? I am straight but both my wife and her girlfriend want to watch me perform oral on a guy. The girlfriend would join in as she is married to a bisexual cuckold but my wife wants no part of other men. I am lucky that she has sex with me but no penetration.


I am with Len51’s wife & gf, I am all about the watching things happen, even assisting and for certain strongly encouraging. I desire to share the experience with him in all aspects.

What I have learned it over the years is that I can condition myself to except or reject anything. I also learned that love is love, sex is sex, yes my husband and I make love but we also have sex. I cannot fill all his needs and he not all mine – and I believe we are quite exceptional at our loving. I have also learned that sharing is caring in our relationship. The more closely we can come to truly sharing an experience the closer it makes us as a couple.

This may or may not be poor examples for others but for us it makes amazing sense and has brought us closer than ever sexually: My husband never got the whole anal sex thing until I gave him the experience. If forever changed the dynamics of our sex life, dp became a large part of it for the fact that it brings the more massive orgasms for me as well as anal on him does. Cum kissing – changed our passion from something that was a bit lackluster after 10 plus years to one of heated, almost unbridled passion. For a man to do that for me, I found a new level of sexual respect if that makes sense? I grew to not only enjoy taking his cum more often but also looking forward to it, knowing how passionate the kissing had become.

[wifekinky4husband]

I want to share every experience with my husband, ever one of them. I am not bi but I still would love to eat another lady out with him, share her with him, all of her body – her V, her breasts, even her lips, and more if it works out that way – so long as we share it together. The same goes for men, I want to share a penis with him. I want him share the experience with me as we both take one in our mouths and let the cum spray in. I want to share the cum in a deep kiss. I know how amazing it feels to take a real penis anally, I know how incredible it is to have it unload deep inside you, pumping all that cum in you filling you up. I want to share that experience with him. I can already take him him to infinity, now I’d like to share with him “the beyond.”

It is all in fun, loving, sharing, caring, enjoying most wonderful experiences with your mate. Of course you have to both be on the same page so why not work and build towards it. I don’t see why anyone would be on this web site that was not somewhat open-minded sexually. Time can work out most things as long as you are working towards something together. We’ve been on a long journey together; it is a never ending one. We have fun with it, we go with the flow. We are moving towards something, what exactly, who knows? Perhaps my husband will one day let it happen as I desire or maybe I will continue to have a blast with all our RP, toys, & machines. There is very little I cannot simulate but still there is the real deal…

I never see what all the fuss is all about, life is too short. Find a common ground and then try expanding on it in one direction or another. Worst case scenario, you have an uber creative fantasy life. Sex dolls and toys can make for quite the adventurous play. J

[Alex2200]

Yup too true for men thinking they hit the sex lotto.

There are women out there that do love guy on guy sex. My fiancee is turned on by it after she met me. My first experience telling a woman that I was dating that I was bisexual was her dumping me. She told me that if her and I continued dating then she would not only worry about me cheating on her with women but with men too. Then she told me to never tell another soul again and take it to my grave. I just moved on and told women before we started dating that I was bisexual. It works out for me that way better.

Honestly, I think when a man doesn't tell his wife that he is bisexual, it's like withholding personal information that she should know. Everybody knows or should know that when you have sex with a person, you are having sex with all the people they have had sex with. A man wants to know how many men have fucked his wife before him. It should be a double standard of a woman knows who her husband has had sex with before her.

I don't blame a wife getting freaked out. Not telling your wife is the same as not telling your wife the truth.

How would you feel if your wife had sex with someone with STDs or HIV but didn't tell you until after you were married? Would you not feel betrayed?



Jared on I on same page just opposites end of say page. I know been open about bisexual from start of any relationship since i was 19. It meant some shunned me and others accepted me. So, imo, honest is best if hope of a truly healthy relationship. FYI, i have been in one for years and years.

[Alex2200]

I think that Sassy has hit a very important nail on the head. Even for bisexual women biphobia hits hardest against bisexual men. This is a fact and not crying victim. It is also in part due to the Patriarchal structure of society. Feminist fight the Patriarchy by pointing out issues that impact women. Homosexuals deal with the Patriarchy as it impacts them. Bisexuals do not deal with the Patriarchy with issues that impact them very well.

Awesone actuate on society view. We live still (ugh) in men rule the world place. I get that.

[void()]

Bisexuals do not deal with the Patriarchy with issues that impact them very well.

Apologies if this seems to go around the issue. Need to fill in a little context though.

In our modern society we face a lot of various adversities. One such issue is that of State domineering over everyone. We are indoctrinated in such manner that finds State becoming a new god.

Not proud of it, merely a fact of what is, America in her two hundred odd years has never truly been at peace. During our Civil War, men were drafted to fight against their own brethren. Fathers were pulled away from homes and children.

This course of warfare calling away fathers has continued. If it is not direct warfare, indirect warfare in the forms of poverty, addictions is waged on fathers. Of course, you have fathers akin to my own, unable and ill suited to accept children as a responsibility.

My father was not emotionally mature because his father had been pulled away. His father worked nearly thirty years in the steel mills, foundries. His father accepted children as responsibility, still pulled away to provide for family while not realizing he had no family if he was not there.

Bisexual or not, some men grew up being their own fathers because they had no other choice. Our modern society failed because it also drew mothers out to work to provide for a family, that did not exist without her. Mothers worked while fathers were at war, worked to help provide when father's returned and needed to get adjusted to being home again.

State helped out too. State injected itself to educate, further indoctrinate and provide basic welfare for children. They set up a factory line to create soldiers, nurses for the soldiers, machinist to make weapons for the soldiers.

Bisexuality is merely one state of being. Not everyone is bisexual. One can be bisexual by choice, or by nature. How one is bisexual does not really matter. Nor does being bisexual matter to issues such as dealing with patriarchy or matriarchy adversities.

If you are also another state of being, human, and it seems most discussing this are human beings. Then, you have had to deal with these adversities at one point or another. The degree of wellness as to how we each respectively deal these issues is not related to any specific sexual orientation, race, nationality, religion, political stance.

The degree of wellness relates to an individual's capacity and potential to light candles in the dark. If a person can remain hopeful, optimistic, they ought to handle any adversity well enough. No one is perfect yet our imperfections create perfection. We have to open our eyes to see this, realize State isn't the god some think.

This goes as well for society, which in my view is merely a reflection of State. Please, consider such issues again. You attempt to propagate division, fear, hate by attempting to tie adversities to one class of people. Well, I'm sorry in case you've missed the memo. We're all people. All of us deal with adversities. No one needs to belong to any class or division. There is no more us and them, just us.

That is not a plea of socialist collectivism either. It is simply what is. We're all human and all of us face problems. Division which breeds itself into fear, then hate is a rather nasty problem. You yourself seem something of a champion against hate. Odd you keep attempting to create more of it. Well, I've rambled enough.

[marine20]

wifekinky4husband ,you are the hottest babe on this sight. my wife is fine with me sucking cock ,and even likes to here the details, but you bring your husband to a whole new level of excitement. your letters always get me hard. some day I would love to take a trip to Atlanta and do some cock sucking and fucking for you !!

[pole_smoker]

I think that Sassy has hit a very important nail on the head. Even for bisexual women biphobia hits hardest against bisexual men. This is a fact and not crying victim. It is also in part due to the Patriarchal structure of society. Feminist fight the Patriarchy by pointing out issues that impact women. Homosexuals deal with the Patriarchy as it impacts them. Bisexuals do not deal with the Patriarchy with issues that impact them very well.
Most bisexuals, and most people including hetero women don't give a shit about the "Patriarchy" or whatever other nonsense professional victim BS you're rambling about that has nothing to do with living in reality or the real world; but is just a bunch of academic theory and nonsense.

Even actual feminists agree that so called "male privilege" has not existed in the western world since the early 1960s.


You yourself seem something of a champion against hate. Odd you keep attempting to create more of it.
Well said, Tenni is a troll and is full of hate.

[elian]

I think it was actually Thomas Jefferson who advocated a public library system and public schools - up until then I guess you could only go to school if you could afford it. It was an interesting experiment for a brand new republic to undertake.

It's interesting that you've hit upon something else discussed in a book I was reading about boyhood in America and the feminization of boys in certain generations.

Another interesting thing I was listening to was a radio program where they were discussing how something made you feel - as if your emotions were a physical part that touched you. ..as in you "hurt" my feelings. They've done studies that show that when you experience bad emotions the same pain centers in the brain that light up for physical pain, also seem to activate for emotional trauma.

(http://www.npr.org/blogs/health/2015/02/03/383426166/fingertips-to-hair-follicles-why-touch-causes-pleasure-and-pain)

A lot of these concepts never existed in older generations - in my grandparents generation they really didn't care how you "felt" because it was hard enough just to put food on the table and keep your butt warm.

Now we have more and more intricate ways of dealing with social interactions..PLUS we now have this global, always on source of constant information..some of it better than others.

You've heard of light pollution and noise pollution, how about "information pollution" - there is so much of it that people literally get overwhelmed..you can hear every little detail of every life on the news and social media much more vividly than before ..all in the space of less than 20 years.

I'm thinking that it sort of rubs people the wrong way sometimes.

What were we talking about?


Apologies if this seems to go around the issue. Need to fill in a little context though.

State helped out too. State injected itself to educate, further indoctrinate and provide basic welfare for children. They set up a factory line to create soldiers, nurses for the soldiers, machinist to make weapons for the soldiers.

[void()]

I think it was actually Thomas Jefferson who advocated a public library system and public schools - up until then I guess you could only go to school if you could afford it. It was an interesting experiment for a brand new republic to undertake.

It's interesting that you've hit upon something else discussed in a book I was reading about boyhood in America and the feminization of boys in certain generations.

Another interesting thing I was listening to was a radio program where they were discussing how something made you feel - as if your emotions were a physical part that touched you. ..as in you "hurt" my feelings. They've done studies that show that when you experience bad emotions the same pain centers in the brain that light up for physical pain, also seem to activate for emotional trauma.

(http://www.npr.org/blogs/health/2015/02/03/383426166/fingertips-to-hair-follicles-why-touch-causes-pleasure-and-pain)

A lot of these concepts never existed in older generations - in my grandparents generation they really didn't care how you "felt" because it was hard enough just to put food on the table and keep your butt warm.

Now we have more and more intricate ways of dealing with social interactions..PLUS we now have this global, always on source of constant information..some of it better than others.

You've heard of light pollution and noise pollution, how about "information pollution" - there is so much of it that people literally get overwhelmed..you can hear every little detail of every life on the news and social media much more vividly than before ..all in the space of less than 20 years.

I'm thinking that it sort of rubs people the wrong way sometimes.

What were we talking about?


I think it was actually Thomas Jefferson who advocated a public library system and public schools - up until then I guess you could only go to school if you could afford it. It was an interesting experiment for a brand new republic to undertake.

Right. Jefferson believed in what America had done. America had done something which had never been done. In America, every man was a king, every woman a queen. All people were granted equal soverignty. All people were and are the rulers or leaders.


emotions were a physical part that touched you. ..as in you "hurt" my feelings. They've done studies that show that when you experience bad emotions the same pain centers in the brain that light up for physical pain, also seem to activate for emotional trauma.

Yes. It took me a long time in coming to grasps with something difficult. You and I have discussed coping methods before. In order to bear abuse one can learn to shut off emotions.

Here is what became a stumbling block for me. I had done that exactly while growing up. I had been told in coming of age, emotions were a good thing, it was fine to feel. People who I entrusted as authorities on these matters also expressed an aversion to socialpathic tendencies, as in they wanted me to feel, instead of not feeling.

Then as I felt, I felt rage, disguist, fear, hopelessness, all this very negative feelings which I had dealt with by turning them off. I was told anger was unacceptable in society. Learned a new coping method, bottled anger up. Of course, if you squeeze a genie back into a bottle you'll never push the cork in. Bottles shatter, only a matter of time.

There was my hurdle. It might have ended me more than a few times. I escaped to reading a lot, a glourious tonne of tomes. I read abouth myths, herbology, fiction, religions, history, biographies, self-help, psychology, philosophy, metaphysics. In the journeys reading took me on, I found the gentle stream, found the do nothings. It is fine to not feel, also. :)

Balance is needed in regards to feelings. A koan I read once:

A student stops, looks out into the ocean where fishermen dredge up fish in nets. He asks his teacher who is there with him, "master, the fish could swim out of the nets. When will they escape the nets?"

His master's reply, "when will you escape your nets?"

To me emotions are both the nets and the fish. They are both fleeting visitors. I can escape the nets any time desired. I also accept sometimes others need to feed upon fish.


A lot of these concepts never existed in older generations - in my grandparents generation they really didn't care how you "felt" because it was hard enough just to put food on the table and keep your butt warm.

*nods, grins* Ah, but they stopped the older models for some reason, or none. *chuckles* Life is absurd then, we die.


Now we have more and more intricate ways of dealing with social interactions..PLUS we now have this global, always on source of constant information..some of it better than others.
You've heard of light pollution and noise pollution, how about "information pollution" - there is so much of it that people literally get overwhelmed..

On a bulletin board system back in the early to mid 1990's a fellow named John Barlow, touched upon information pollution. He also was something of an advocate in regards to information being free. I paraphrase him at times in regards to free information. He said roughly information like gentle streams would ever remain free, not be hindered by boulders. Information would simply go around the boulders, he said. And no, I'm not him incognito, maybe cut of similar molds but not him.

I agree too about the quality of information being speculative on wholesale. The more I see of any form of media nowadays, the more I side with George Carlin, "it's all one big f*&^ing circus." Even entertainment is no longer entertaining because of the atrocious propoganda so obviously forced into the context of the entertainment. An example is the television show Criminal Minds. I did enjoy watching it at one time, not sure I am able to now. Last weeks episode and this week's had a minor story arc which seemed to scream out, "oh, be very afraid. See? Not even the children of F.B.I agents are safe. Be afraid, be very, very afraid."

Watched it but did not really quite accept that the editors would justify such a story. Of course, they may not have had choice. *shrugs* Thank you, State, for runing yet another nice mind numbing bit of pretty flashing lights for me." Guess I'll read more, build more, grow more, live more. :) Ah, I see now, State is exercising its power to persuade me to also buy more. *lol*

Think we were talking about tenni being such a gallant champion against hate, or maybe it was how to fit pipe into buildings? I do not recall. We could talk about how to make a quick hand powered clothes washer out of a five gallon bucket, plunger, or not?

NB: The original subject matter asks why male bisexuality freaks women out.

That is a broad question and I think phrased broadly intentionally. Not all women are freaked out by bisexaul men. My wife for example is not freaked out by me, a bisexual man. She gets freaked out that I do drink water at times. *chuckles*

As the question is broad in scope, I can only respond broadly. Ask the specific woman that is freaked out by bisexual men, why she is freaked out. You might be surprised. She may actually not mind explaining why she's freaked out.

Then, if you happen to be bisexual by choice you may consider if it is worth having this specific woman freaked out. If you're bisexual by nature, well, guess there is not much consider except to not broach the subject of bisexuality with this specific woman. Unless you really want her freaked out for some reason.

This all seems juvenile and petty. Not sure what to discern of it, nor how to better respond except to not respond.

[void()]

Well said, Tenni is a troll and is full of hate.

Had thought the word hypocritical more apt, troll, stupid work as well. Will return to ignoring his posts now.
And no, not insulting him and then running off. Not name calling either. Think it is fairly established that others
can see a spade as a spade. At any given, I simply refuse to abide stupidity. If someone acts stupid by choice,
my choice to avoid them. As I said elswhere, I side step dead horses.

[Cutiliae]

My wife says it's "unmanly" for men to have sex with one another. That is why I could never tell her about my love for sucking cock....she would not be able to tolerate that. I informed her about how some men allow their wives to "peg" them and her response was she would not want to be with a man that would want to be pegged. Anyway, put my wife in the category of "freaked out."

[void()]

My wife says it's "unmanly" for men to have sex with one another. That is why I could never tell her about my love for sucking cock....she would not be able to tolerate that. I informed her about how some men allow their wives to "peg" them and her response was she would not want to be with a man that would want to be pegged. Anyway, put my wife in the category of "freaked out."

Well, you might consider a different wife. If that is not an option, guess you'll find a way to handle things.
Not condoning cheating but it does seem to be an option for some. If you do, I don't want to know.

If I don't know I cannot have a lesser opinion of you as a person. That is even if my opinion of you matters to you. *chuckles*
It may not matter to you what I think of you. That is fine too. *chuckling* Being fair you should know it is likely I don't consider what you think of me to be of much importance either. Ha! We're even! :) ;)

The only time I would care to know would be if you and I decided mutally to get involved sexually, romantically. At that point I think it is fair to have disclosure from both parties involved. Otherwise, it is really not any of my business, nor yours of mine. Hopefully I'm not making cents here. If I am fix me a PB & J sandwich, send me on my merry after telling me Silly Putty is flat. :) I'll be pondering the wonders for years. *LOL*

[GettingThere]

My wife and I have been together 16 years and sort of got into 'swinging'. She recognized my 'bi' side and since she would rather be with 2 guys than see me with another girl she was Ok with it. She recently said to me, "I think it's unfair that guys get to both penetrate and be penetrated"

We haven't gone too much further due to other circumstances but will be exploring that bucket soon. Yes, finally, at 55, I am lucky and 'GettingThere'

[void()]

My wife and I have been together 16 years and sort of got into 'swinging'. She recognized my 'bi' side and since she would rather be with 2 guys than see me with another girl she was Ok with it. She recently said to me, "I think it's unfair that guys get to both penetrate and be penetrated"

We haven't gone too much further due to other circumstances but will be exploring that bucket soon. Yes, finally, at 55, I am lucky and 'GettingThere'

* hides his green face * Lucky dog, you. The more I keep hearing about, seeing or generally being made aware of women pegging men, the more keen on the idea I'm becoming. Used be adamantly against such an idea. Starting to realize there may be advantages. * sits listening to Bach fade out and Rednex fade in, takes a dark lager from the cooler, kicks back a swill *

[tenni]

My wife says it's "unmanly" for men to have sex with one another. That is why I could never tell her about my love for sucking cock....she would not be able to tolerate that. I informed her about how some men allow their wives to "peg" them and her response was she would not want to be with a man that would want to be pegged. Anyway, put my wife in the category of "freaked out."

The way that I see your wife's reaction is that she is biphobic. Now, we could write that she is homophobic but that may be unfair. She may not be concerned if two men have sex but if one of them wants to have sex with her as well..well no. Some may see that as her right. Some may see it as biphobic. She fears and is averse to men having sex with both men and women. She holds prejudicial and discriminatory opinions about bisexual men. She is a bigot. We rarely read such women described in this manner.

Maybe, we need to realize that is what is going on. Ask her what she thinks about two women having sex with each other and a man as well? Is it unwomanly/unfeminine for women to have sex/kiss/hug each other? If so, she may also be homophobic. Tell her so..or is it better to just be quiet..? ;)

[elian]

I try not to read more into the statement than what is there. There are a lot of women and men who think that two men having sex is somehow wrong, especially for the submissive one (because there ALWAYS has to be a submissive one, right - they couldn't just be two men wanting to have sex) ..

I mean why would a man give up all the privilege that goes with being a man in order to pretend to be (gasp) a woman?

(..at least that is what they sort of think.. it couldn't be about, you know - love or attraction or anything)..

I mean men have to always be strong and in control, they couldn't possibly have the same range of emotions as the other gender with a slightly different outward appearance.

[void()]

I mean why would a man give up all the privilege that goes with being a man in order to pretend to be (gasp) a woman?

*joking in loving manner* Oh hush bitch. That's all you do, is bitch,
bitch, bitch. *smirking grin*

In honesty, never saw it as surrendering masculinity to let the feminine
dominate. See it as a man letting himself be open, vulnerable. That
takes strength and courage. Know that when I let you be dominate and
submit to you, there's no 'pretending to be a woman'.

What I do is release a fair bit of control. And yes, that at times is
more difficult than other times. Sometimes the body has problems, other
times the mind, emotions have problems. When I am able to submit with
a man though, mm, it feels so nice. Doing so with a woman is more of
an adversity. I blame George Bush Jr, just for giggles. I know it is
cultural, societal.

Besides, being submissive with a woman can get frightening. Some women
get super excited about being in charge. Nothing wrong in that exactly.
Still always a concern, they may go too far. Not attempting to sound
unfair in this as it is a concern from both genders. My experience
suggests it's more so a concern with women. But I'm a man, we're always
wrong anyway. *grin*

[Cutiliae]

The way that I see your wife's reaction is that she is biphobic. Now, we could write that she is homophobic but that may be unfair. She may not be concerned if two men have sex but if one of them wants to have sex with her as well..well no. Some may see that as her right. Some may see it as biphobic. She fears and is averse to men having sex with both men and women. She holds prejudicial and discriminatory opinions about bisexual men. She is a bigot. We rarely read such women described in this manner.

Maybe, we need to realize that is what is going on. Ask her what she thinks about two women having sex with each other and a man as well? Is it unwomanly/unfeminine for women to have sex/kiss/hug each other? If so, she may also be homophobic. Tell her so..or is it better to just be quiet..? ;)

She really does not care if men or women are gay or bisexual; she says to each their own. However, she does not want to be with a man that is bi because it is not manly. She does not tolerate effeminate men....Men are not supposed to act like the "Wiggles" the kids tv show so our kids were not allowed to watch it. All I know is that me coming out to her would not be a good thing....it would be over. I could recover, I've been divorced before. But if I can avoid it for now I will. It's better to just keep silent.

[tommyswing]

I want to share every experience with my husband, ever one of them. I am not bi but I still would love to eat another lady out with him, share her with him, all of her body – her V, her breasts, even her lips, and more if it works out that way – so long as we share it together. The same goes for men, I want to share a penis with him. I want him share the experience with me as we both take one in our mouths and let the cum spray in. I want to share the cum in a deep kiss. I know how amazing it feels to take a real penis anally, I know how incredible it is to have it unload deep inside you, pumping all that cum in you filling you up. I want to share that experience with him. I can already take him him to infinity, now I’d like to share with him “the beyond.”

It is all in fun, loving, sharing, caring, enjoying most wonderful experiences with your mate. Of course you have to both be on the same page so why not work and build towards it. I don’t see why anyone would be on this web site that was not somewhat open-minded sexually. Time can work out most things as long as you are working towards something together. We’ve been on a long journey together; it is a never ending one. We have fun with it, we go with the flow. We are moving towards something, what exactly, who knows? Perhaps my husband will one day let it happen as I desire or maybe I will continue to have a blast with all our RP, toys, & machines. There is very little I cannot simulate but still there is the real deal…


I never see what all the fuss is all about, life is too short. Find a common ground and then try expanding on it in one direction or another. Worst case scenario, you have an uber creative fantasy life. Sex dolls and toys can make for quite the adventurous play. J


That so well explains how i view bisexuality in relationships. Sharing a cock or pussy with my loved one is such a turn on. Watching her being pleasured in a d/p or her watching me being entered a real turn on. In reality there are not many women or men that could handle that type of situation, I think people like us are unusual in that respect. There is a double standerd I've known bi women who won't date bi men "because it's disgusting", and they see no irrational patterns in their thinking. I'm currently for that type of situation, but I know I'll have to be very patient.

[MissMeBi]

As a bi female it doesnt freak me out at all. In fact its kind of a turn on, my issue is that my bf of over a year is closet and still lying about it. I'm worried he may not be bi and that myself and my children are only a cover for him. I'm freaked out at the thought that he is gay but not that he is bi.

[Oregon97015]

Need to relax about it you'll drive yourself crazy, let thing common down. Buy a strap on, or get him a dildo to use on him. Let things defuse for a bite.

[jocamig]

The female actually needs to listen to the info. I came out the same night we had our first intimate moment. Unfortunately she didn't bother to understand that and after 15 years of common life I still have to remind her about it and how I came out. It was such a difficult moment for me to do that but after more than 12 years of a failed marriage I had to do so. Not only do tell but make sure she understands. Unfortunately, at the time we didn't have the plethora of online information. I wish I could have pointed her to websites such as the bisexual index and others that we have today. If your partner fears or doesn't understand something you must make sure to provide clear-cut info.

[sopitup]

New to this site. Have had sex with men and women. Always fantasized about bi-threeway. never dreamed it might happen. I had never confessed my bi tendencies to any woman until Janet (name changed). She is the one who asked if I had ever thought about it, I managed to say I wasn't opposed to it. I finally confessed that I had played with a man once, well one man more than once. That was pretty much the end of it, not our relationship it kind of waxes and wans. Out of the blue she called and asked if I would be interested in getting together with her new boyfriend. Feeling particularly horny I agreed. It was awesome, never looked back. She broke up with him, thank goodness, he was a unstable. We continue to see each other off and on, more friends with benefits. The other night she asked me if would be interested in getting together with her ex-husband, awkward! Odd thing was he just wanted to get together with me. I knew him, it had been 30+ year since I had seen him though. I waited for him to text me, he was very nervous but probably had more experience with men than myself. We did get together, he was still very shy the way I remember. Found out from Janet that he does want to get together with the both of us. Anxiously waiting.

[sysper]

New to this site. Have had sex with men and women. Always fantasized about bi-threeway. never dreamed it might happen. I had never confessed my bi tendencies to any woman until Janet (name changed). She is the one who asked if I had ever thought about it, I managed to say I wasn't opposed to it. I finally confessed that I had played with a man once, well one man more than once. That was pretty much the end of it, not our relationship it kind of waxes and wans. Out of the blue she called and asked if I would be interested in getting together with her new boyfriend. Feeling particularly horny I agreed. It was awesome, never looked back. She broke up with him, thank goodness, he was a unstable. We continue to see each other off and on, more friends with benefits. The other night she asked me if would be interested in getting together with her ex-husband, awkward! Odd thing was he just wanted to get together with me. I knew him, it had been 30+ year since I had seen him though. I waited for him to text me, he was very nervous but probably had more experience with men than myself. We did get together, he was still very shy the way I remember. Found out from Janet that he does want to get together with the both of us. Anxiously waiting.
that's an interesting situation :) wish i had some kinda opportunities like u have & u do right now. hope all 3 of u have a great time!

[Olivia920601]

You will find answers at http://www.bi-sexualdating.com/

[BobT1960]

I came out to my wife in 1994 after a bout of depression. We started dating in 1986 , fell in love and got engaged. She wanted to get wed a year to the day we started going out together. 3 months into the relationship I went through a notebook she had left out which contained notes of a phone call she had made back to the UK from Ibiza while on holiday to her best friend. I knew the way they looked into each other's eyes that is was more than just a platonic friendship and never broached the matter with her. We were married in 1987 and have two boys (26 and 25 next month). I kept a secret from her about being sexually abused as a teenager and bottling this up for 20 years led to my nervous breakdown. Being hospitalised was a living nightmare for me as I was dosed up with meds and I was a zombie. I told the medical staff and support workers about my abuse but couldn't express my self enough. As a result they told me I was having delusions and I would only get better by accepting it was a fantasy. I knew it was real and nobody took it seriously until my younger sister confirmed that I had indeed been abused (she was also a victim). I was nudged towards coming out as gay but had no support in exploring the gamut of sexuality and make an informed choice. My wife and I maintained the marriage for the sake of the kids but we didn't discuss the issue and muddled through. My youngest son had a mental health crisis a couple of months ago and told us about his now ex partner being sexually abused which triggered flashbacks of being in hospital and of my abuse. I now feel trapped after telling my wife that I now identified as being bisexual and she accepted it there and then which led me to ask her straight up about her "friendship" which she flatly denied. My sister sent me a letter after I left hospital in 1994 which I never read but speaking to my sister on the phone she said it was definitely posted and my mother confirmed it was in the house before I returned home. She , my wife , said it may have been lost in the post. I'm waiting for an assessment for PTSD and hope to be seen in the next week. I'm now content , happy and comfortable with calling myself bi as my workmates and friends think I'm a closet gay and keeping it a secret. There is a difference to being called gay when actually I'm bisexual (4 on the scale)

[BobT1960]

I spoke to my sister earlier who gave me a reality check. I need to speak to my wife again and respect her choice , I can't make her mind up for her. I also chatted to my youngest son and he was cool when I told him I was bi. He wasn't shocked when I told him about my porn viewing habits , Gay , Les and Hetero and what some consider a little weird , squirting , midgets and Trans (cock , arse , tits and mouth in one package) Starting to get horny so I'm off to check some of the forum threads on here.

[pole_smoker]

I came out to my wife in 1994 after a bout of depression. We started dating in 1986 , fell in love and got engaged. She wanted to get wed a year to the day we started going out together. 3 months into the relationship I went through a notebook she had left out which contained notes of a phone call she had made back to the UK from Ibiza while on holiday to her best friend. I knew the way they looked into each other's eyes that is was more than just a platonic friendship and never broached the matter with her. We were married in 1987 and have two boys (26 and 25 next month). I kept a secret from her about being sexually abused as a teenager and bottling this up for 20 years led to my nervous breakdown. Being hospitalised was a living nightmare for me as I was dosed up with meds and I was a zombie. I told the medical staff and support workers about my abuse but couldn't express my self enough. As a result they told me I was having delusions and I would only get better by accepting it was a fantasy. I knew it was real and nobody took it seriously until my younger sister confirmed that I had indeed been abused (she was also a victim). I was nudged towards coming out as gay but had no support in exploring the gamut of sexuality and make an informed choice. My wife and I maintained the marriage for the sake of the kids but we didn't discuss the issue and muddled through. My youngest son had a mental health crisis a couple of months ago and told us about his now ex partner being sexually abused which triggered flashbacks of being in hospital and of my abuse. I now feel trapped after telling my wife that I now identified as being bisexual and she accepted it there and then which led me to ask her straight up about her "friendship" which she flatly denied. My sister sent me a letter after I left hospital in 1994 which I never read but speaking to my sister on the phone she said it was definitely posted and my mother confirmed it was in the house before I returned home. She , my wife , said it may have been lost in the post. I'm waiting for an assessment for PTSD and hope to be seen in the next week. I'm now content , happy and comfortable with calling myself bi as my workmates and friends think I'm a closet gay and keeping it a secret. There is a difference to being called gay when actually I'm bisexual (4 on the scale)
At least you got help for being sexually abused.

Most people who are on this site who have been sexually abused do not get help. What did your sister say the letter she sent via post said?

[BobT1960]

At least you got help for being sexually abused.

Most people who are on this site who have been sexually abused do not get help. What did your sister say the letter she sent via post said?

She cannot recall every word from 20 odd years ago but when I phoned her because I was getting a bit paranoid she said she spent 3 hours composing a long rambling letter and basically the gist was not to blame myself for what happened to her as it was just lousy that when the abuse stopped with me it started with her. We both agreed that we played "doctors and nurses" (heavy petting) as a consequence of what happened to us. It is now all in the past , shit happens and I need to file it away.

[Masterslave]

My wife/slave loves to watch me and my friends, all male fuck and suck. My ex loved it too. She pulled gang bangs but insured that the guys were all ok with being sucked by me. She said it made it hotter knowing I had sucked the cock on her to get it hard or they were going to pull out so I could clean her cunt juices off their cocks while they came on my mouth. I guess I've been lucky, most women I've been with loved the fact that I'm a cocksucker. My wife/slave encouraged me to put up this profile and on other sites to get plenty of cock for me to suck.

[Annika L]

Ok, I've not read all replies on this thread, so I apologize if I'm restating something already noted.

But I have talked to a lot of male and female bisexuals on this site and others, and to a lot of their partners/spouses. My observation is that when men come out to their wives as bisexual, it is *most frequently* (i.e., but not always) in the context of having been cheating on their for weeks to years...or they out and out got caught cheating and *that* is what prompted "coming out". In this case, I can't blame the woman at all for "freaking out". But however they express it, the freakout is not primarily about the sexuality; it's about the cheating. And if cheating hasn't happened, there is still fear that it did, fear that the man will reject her in favor of men (i.e., that he's really gay, or that she is not sexually satisfying to him). Particularly when a woman is completely financially dependent on her husband (which is depressingly common), and/or when children are involved in the relationship, these fears are real and reasonable.

By contrast:

When a woman comes out to a man as bisexual, if she hasn't cheated then yeah, the male fascination with ff sex kicks in, fantasies run wild, and the guy thinks he's won the lottery. That's not always a wonderful thing for the woman. In at least a couple instances, that has led to the man arranging for a threesome involving his wife *without telling the wife!!!* Basically, she comes home and is expected to perform on demand with a complete stranger (sometimes a complete stranger who has had prior sexual relations with the friggin' husband). And if she has cheated, there's a fair chance the man (a) doesn't consider ff sex as legitimate "real" sex, so doesn't consider it cheating...which sounds great for everyone involved, until you realize how hurtful it is to have your sexuality and meaningful sexual relationships invalidated; or (b) finds that the prospect of hot threesomes (whether or not this is a real possibility) outweighs the trust issues caused by the cheating.

The human race would really benefit if everyone would just stop playing the "we have it harder" game.

[pepperjack]

Precisely why I don't get involved with married men. Don't want the intrigue, being a party to the betrayal. Have respect for the sanctity of marriage. Although I make myself crystal clear in my ads that I only want responses from single men ( unless it's an open couple seeking a 3rd male), they respond anyway. So, as an extra precaution I always ask to make sure & I've weeded a lot of them out that way. I've learned to spot certain red flags, such as " must be discreet." Unfortunately, most of the bisexuals around here are married & cheating, which makes pickins' kind of slim at times. :(

[void()]

Precisely why I don't get involved with married men. Don't want the intrigue, being a party to the betrayal. Have respect for the sanctity of marriage. Although I make myself crystal clear in my ads that I only want responses from single men ( unless it's an open couple seeking a 3rd male), they respond anyway. So, as an extra precaution I always ask to make sure & I've weeded a lot of them out that way. I've learned to spot certain red flags, such as " must be discreet." Unfortunately, most of the bisexuals around here are married & cheating, which makes pickins' kind of slim at times. :(

Ha Ha! And a pity here I am married but not cheating, technically. What is odd is sitting with a straight wife, and you both get all hot and bothered over some of the same male actors of stuff you enjoy for the two minutes you can. Then at times I get the hot and bothered but she doesn't, or vice versa. Often, scare her by watching the stuff considered chick flicks. then it dawns on her,

"Oh, duh. Of course, you'd watch that trash."

[cuttin2dachase]

Not all women are freaked out about mm sex, but true bi-friendly women are rare. Most women who are freaked out about mm sex have traditional religious or moral beliefs and upbringing. They've been taught that homosexuality is sinful and/or not natural and that a man is not a real man if he's not masculine and straight. Insecurity plays a part too. Women want sexual exclusivity with their men and are on guard for other women encroaching on their man or for their man having a wandering eye and desiring other women. Unless a man tells his S/O early on that he likes men too, his S/O is usually going to be blindsided and absolutely devastated if she discovers he's bi, when all she thought she had to worry about was other women.

[silvio]

Maybe because, we know we cannot truly satisfy him the way he needs to satisfied the way a man can do it.Maybe because deep down, we all know that dick is more powerful than a vagina is, and can give great pleasure. And some of us are okay with that.Or simply maybe because seeing, or even thinking about a man being with a another man grosses them out.Or it makes them see men as weak.Even with me being bisexual, I will admit I cannot date a bisexual man. I like for men to be my ideal type of men.And bisexual men do not fit that mold.

Best answer, I have to agree 100%, most females will look at the subject that way, either we like it or not, fact of life...

[pepperjack]

I, on the other hand have a longtime female friend who gave in to her bisexual desires long before I did. We were once lovers who remained friends which later evolved into a fwb relationship. During our platonic phase, she very candidly shared a then current relationship she was having with a woman. Most recently, while caught up in the aftermath of a bad relationship with a man, she once again admitted to sexual trysts with a woman she met on CL. She's now in another relationship with a man. I've never come out to her but I think she strongly suspects. I don't think it's so cut & dry, black & white. I think the lines have been and continue to be, significantly blurred. People are just too complex at times.

[sysper]

Ok, I've not read all replies on this thread, so I apologize if I'm restating something already noted.

But I have talked to a lot of male and female bisexuals on this site and others, and to a lot of their partners/spouses. My observation is that when men come out to their wives as bisexual, it is *most frequently* (i.e., but not always) in the context of having been cheating on their for weeks to years...or they out and out got caught cheating and *that* is what prompted "coming out". In this case, I can't blame the woman at all for "freaking out". But however they express it, the freakout is not primarily about the sexuality; it's about the cheating. And if cheating hasn't happened, there is still fear that it did, fear that the man will reject her in favor of men (i.e., that he's really gay, or that she is not sexually satisfying to him). Particularly when a woman is completely financially dependent on her husband (which is depressingly common), and/or when children are involved in the relationship, these fears are real and reasonable.

By contrast:

When a woman comes out to a man as bisexual, if she hasn't cheated then yeah, the male fascination with ff sex kicks in, fantasies run wild, and the guy thinks he's won the lottery. That's not always a wonderful thing for the woman. In at least a couple instances, that has led to the man arranging for a threesome involving his wife *without telling the wife!!!* Basically, she comes home and is expected to perform on demand with a complete stranger (sometimes a complete stranger who has had prior sexual relations with the friggin' husband). And if she has cheated, there's a fair chance the man (a) doesn't consider ff sex as legitimate "real" sex, so doesn't consider it cheating...which sounds great for everyone involved, until you realize how hurtful it is to have your sexuality and meaningful sexual relationships invalidated; or (b) finds that the prospect of hot threesomes (whether or not this is a real possibility) outweighs the trust issues caused by the cheating.

The human race would really benefit if everyone would just stop playing the "we have it harder" game.
from what i have observed in life, which isn't very much, i think the main reason women get freaked out is because it threatens there ability to be sexually good to there men. sorry i can't find a better way to say it. they think they might not be good enough sexually. but what u say is, there's more of a disgust or disappointment when there is cheating involved. i trust ur observation more cause u have actually talked to people about this who have been affected. i also think it's rude for a man to assume a bi wife=3sums. maybe that side of her is so personal not even he is a part of it. maybe she has decided to give up persuing that, knowing it's a part of who she is & what she enjoys, all for him. as a guy i admit, a mff is 1 of my biggest fantasies.....i know big surprise lol, though to be fair that's not the only combination of 3sum i'm willing to consider :).......but i would feel uncomfortable at the least if i had a wife & considered involving anybody else in our sexlife. the sexual lust would not outweigh trust issues with me.

[James1A1]

I am the luckiest guy!

I had an incredibly great relationship with a woman when I was 19, about 5 years ago.

She was so sexually free it was a pleasure to listen to her. She was 28 at the time.

She told me that she wasn't interested in younger guys like me, but she said my enthusiasm to learn and my playfulness changed that.

She taught me that so many of my thoughts of what is right and wrong about sex were based on fear, ignorance and society. She never demanded anything of me other than my honesty. I gave her that, and I trusted her.
She introduced me to thousands of things I may never have otherwise.
She taught me that there is nothing inherently wrong with a guy having sex with another guy. After much discussion, she invited a guy that was a sexual friend of hers to meet with us. He was about 10 years older than me. The 3 of us openly talked about sexual stuff on several occasions. I never felt pressure or judgement on anything by them.
Even though I was anxious I agreed to explore sex with him. We agreed that this would be done openly with she being an observer and also to protect me in anyway if she thought that I may do something I may regret or feel shame.
He touched me, as I gained comfort, I touched him in the same way.
Touching and exploring his cock and balls was really interesting to me. I never explored a guy's body before.
At the same time, he was touching me in ways that physically just felt so great that was getting insanely horny.
By the end of our first bedroom exploration I had ejaculated in his mouth, even though there were times when he was sucking me that I did get that guilty feeling that cumming would be somehow shameful to me. I tried to pull away and stop, but was encouraged and reassured that I was ok . They both said that to me.
When I agreed and got that out of my mind, I had one of the most mind blowing orgasm ever. She was so thrilled. She was laughing with pure joy and had tears running off her face as she held me so tightly as my body kept on spasming for another 10 minutes. All the time she is both thanking me because she loved watching and congratulating me for overcoming a silly fear. It surprised me how happy she was. He even said it was great and thanked me too.
We got together a few more times. I became more active and sucked his cock. I found it was great sexy fun. Again, she was always so thankful and congratulated me.
We repeated this a few times. I could not progress to anything anal, nor could I kiss him, even though they both wished I would.
I loved her in a unique and genuine love.
That summer when I was 19.
I am just beginning to understand 5 years later.
I was so freakin lucky!!!

[sysper]

that sounds like an awesome friend to have! i love girls who are open to male bisexuality. that's the kinda sexual freedom i'm looking for, but it would be nice to have a friend to encourage me to let go of my fears & ignorance & just be open to fun. plus i do think about being physical with a guy to please a girl. something about that. hope i meet a special friend like that someday. too bad u didn't get to anal or kissing with him, then again maybe it just wasn't meant to be for 1 reason or another. best to let go & plan ur future.
I am the luckiest guy!

I had an incredibly great relationship with a woman when I was 19, about 5 years ago.

She was so sexually free it was a pleasure to listen to her. She was 28 at the time.

She told me that she wasn't interested in younger guys like me, but she said my enthusiasm to learn and my playfulness changed that.

She taught me that so many of my thoughts of what is right and wrong about sex were based on fear, ignorance and society. She never demanded anything of me other than my honesty. I gave her that, and I trusted her.
She introduced me to thousands of things I may never have otherwise.
She taught me that there is nothing inherently wrong with a guy having sex with another guy. After much discussion, she invited a guy that was a sexual friend of hers to meet with us. He was about 10 years older than me. The 3 of us openly talked about sexual stuff on several occasions. I never felt pressure or judgement on anything by them.
Even though I was anxious I agreed to explore sex with him. We agreed that this would be done openly with she being an observer and also to protect me in anyway if she thought that I may do something I may regret or feel shame.
He touched me, as I gained comfort, I touched him in the same way.
Touching and exploring his cock and balls was really interesting to me. I never explored a guy's body before.
At the same time, he was touching me in ways that physically just felt so great that was getting insanely horny.
By the end of our first bedroom exploration I had ejaculated in his mouth, even though there were times when he was sucking me that I did get that guilty feeling that cumming would be somehow shameful to me. I tried to pull away and stop, but was encouraged and reassured that I was ok . They both said that to me.
When I agreed and got that out of my mind, I had one of the most mind blowing orgasm ever. She was so thrilled. She was laughing with pure joy and had tears running off her face as she held me so tightly as my body kept on spasming for another 10 minutes. All the time she is both thanking me because she loved watching and congratulating me for overcoming a silly fear. It surprised me how happy she was. He even said it was great and thanked me too.
We got together a few more times. I became more active and sucked his cock. I found it was great sexy fun. Again, she was always so thankful and congratulated me.
We repeated this a few times. I could not progress to anything anal, nor could I kiss him, even though they both wished I would.
I loved her in a unique and genuine love.
That summer when I was 19.
I am just beginning to understand 5 years later.
I was so freakin lucky!!!

[cuttin2dachase]

I'm speaking from my experience only and hope I don't catch a lot of flack from expressing my opinion/s, but here goes. The great majority of women, str8 or bi, are very possessive, territorial and jealous/emotional, much moreso than the great majority of men. They want to know that their partner wants them and only them. They won't tolerate their man being with other women or fanrtasizing about them, so why would they accept/tolerate their men being with other men or fantasizing about sex with men? One of the biggest male fantasies, whether he's str8 or bi, is to share his woman with another man and see her assume the role of total slut and his own personal porn queen. Bottom line is that only the MORE libidinous, adventurous/freaky women will truly desire to fulfill, embrace and ENJOY his fantasy. If he wants sex with their male partner/s as well, his woman must be a MOST libidinous, adventurous/ultra-freaky woman to embrace and enjoy such a scene. Women have as many sexual fantasies as men,but are just not wired to admit to their desires and pursue them. I'd wager that there are hundreds of thousands of wives/gfs who secretly would enjoy being shared with other men AND seeing their men have sex with other men, but they are too afraid to broach the subject. I'm glad my 1st wife was a freaky hotwife who wasn't afraid to tell me her kinkiest fantasies and help me discover my bisexuality.

[pole_smoker]

I'm speaking from my experience only and hope I don't catch a lot of flack from expressing my opinion/s, but here goes. The great majority of women, str8 or bi, are very possessive, territorial and jealous/emotional, much moreso than the great majority of men. They want to know that their partner wants them and only them. They won't tolerate their man being with other women or fanrtasizing about them, so why would they accept/tolerate their men being with other men or fantasizing about sex with men? One of the biggest male fantasies, whether he's str8 or bi, is to share his woman with another man and see her assume the role of total slut and his own personal porn queen. Bottom line is that only the MORE libidinous, adventurous/freaky women will truly desire to fulfill, embrace and ENJOY his fantasy. If he wants sex with their male partner/s as well, his woman must be a MOST libidinous, adventurous/ultra-freaky woman to embrace and enjoy such a scene. Women have as many sexual fantasies as men,but are just not wired to admit to their desires and pursue them. I'd wager that there are hundreds of thousands of wives/gfs who secretly would enjoy being shared with other men AND seeing their men have sex with other men, but they are too afraid to broach the subject. I'm glad my 1st wife was a freaky hotwife who wasn't afraid to tell me her kinkiest fantasies and help me discover my bisexuality.
A lot of lesbian women are extremely possessive/jealous, abusive, and territorial towards other lesbian and bi women who they are supposedly in a "partnership/relationship" or "marriage" with. :rolleyes:

The original poster is not meeting the right hetero, lesbian, and bisexual women.

[The Galion]

I will not sugar coat my wife's responses to me nor my notions.
I "believe" she is jealous as fuck but she will never admit that. She's always been very jealous of my very regular friends so I have only one or so right now. That's BEFORE she knew I like to suck cock!

She's too stupid to comprehend/accept the notion.
Sorry ladies and gents. My wife is too stupid to be able to comprehend that a man loves her dearly but he also likes to suck cock.
Sorry.

[MissRina]

I love being with bisexual men, my hubby is learning to love cock as much as I do. To enjoy the throbbing of a cock in his mouth. Some freak out because they are not willing to truly accept their man for who he is instead of what they wish him to be. Which in my opinion isn't love, you must love your significant love for everything they are, not just what you wish them to be.

[woody1340]

I told my sister that I am bisexual and it brought us closer. We now share our sexual experiences. We text pics of each other and have phone sex. She knew I spent a lot of time with adult men when I was young and always suspected I was having sex with them.(

[Tatuaje]

Sorry if I am late to the dance. Some women are intolerant of make bisexuality out of fear. It might be upsetting to a woman to lose her husband to cheating with a woman, but that is common and her friends will take her side. Losing her hubby to a man is so much worse. She fears her friends will riddle her behind her back as a fag hag or worse. Like she was married to a lesser man and could not even keep him from getting fucked in the ass.

[Waylon]

Over the years I have had 3 girlfriends who confessed they actually were turned on by my bisexuality and admitting getting turned on when they could watch 2 men together. Each one had a bi male friend and we got together several times. Since I am only orally bisexual with men, each girl got off watching me suck their friend off and then they would suck me off, sometimes with their friend joining in. It was always pretty hot times.

[centillini]

My thoughts, those that are "turned off" by it, are intimidated by it, because they don't have total control with their pussy's.

[csreef]

I've been truly blessed that I have met women who were very understanding and supportive of me being bisexual. One woman said that I was so cool for being so true to myself. Which I took as a great complement. It turned out that she was very Bi curious herself, and never took any opportunities to explore it.

Once though, I went out with this woman,(she was kind of abrasive) and she said that she had done campaign work for a Congressman who was very supportive of LGBT rights. When I told her that I was Bi, her face tightened up. I asked if this was going to be a problem, and she replied " Well not right now, it isn't." I said that I wanted to be upfront & honest with her and she replied, "thank you for your honesty." Thankfully, we only went out once more after that.

It truly boils down to how open minded the woman you are with is.