Problem during MMF experience

[whitehawk138]

My wife and I recently had our first mmf encounter. We met up with this guy and after talking a bit began to disrobe. We started things by making my wife the center of attention. Once she seemed to be enjoying herself I slowly moved and began sucking his cock while he licked her nipples. Once she noticed what I was doing she almost instantly orgasmed. I enjoyed sucking his cock and was extremely turned on by it. However, I noticed that I hadn't really gotten hard. He gave me head a couple times during our encounter (he was terrible) and so did my wife but I would almost immediately go limp after they stopped. It felt good, I was horny as hell and yet I was soft. I had all the sensations I would have but sadly I was not staying erect. I was eventually able to get it up and fuck my wife fairly proper as I sucked his cock some more. Is this normal? I felt embarrassed, and that I had let them down. It was just very weird, even more so considering once my wife and I were home she recounted the events and I got hard and we fucked for a good two hours. Was it my nerves, fear, anxiety, or something else? I really want to do this again but I am terrified that performance issues could arise once more and may send the wrong idea to my wife. Any words of advice or anything?

[Indyguy]

Sounds like you were just taking it all in, once you do it more with a 3way, it will become more of a turn on for you. Sounds like you were just concentrating on their pleasure, which is not a bad thing, have done that myself. Keep enjoying the playtime, long as everyone leaves satisfied, it is all good.

[whitehawk138]

Guess that's part of my worry... not having the opportunity to do it much. We searched for months and the guy we did this with travels so even if we get the opportunity with him it could be months again. Our goal was to find someone semi regular and I thought that would help but we haven't been able to. Would love to see if being with the same person would change things and allow for me to be more at ease. I said we had recently done this but it's been over a month lol she wants to play again and I just don't want a seemingly bad experience. I thoroughly enjoyed myself but it looked the opposite and if it happens again she may think I don't enjoy it.

[Indyguy]

whitehawk - it is common, having an erection during this will come and go, as will your concentration level. The fact that you get hard when you are the one receiving the attention shows that you are normal. Just discuss it with her and let her know you feel aroused and enjoy the experience, everyone will relax. Communication is a key during a 3way, everyone needs to express what they like, what they want to do and what they want to receive. Once those needs are all met, relax and enjoy the ride. Wish I was closer to help you see this more often. :)

[Neonaught]

First time jitters are nothing to get worried about. It's pretty normal. Keep in mind that there is no substitute for being comfortable with each other before the clothes come off.

[whitehawk138]

It is really good to hear that it is normal lol. Like I said I really enjoyed that night. I wish there were more opportunities for this to happen but at this time we are left wanting. I learned a lot of things with this experience, I love sucking cock, she loves seeing that and that if I wouldn't have been to jittery (lmao) I am completely okay giving anal to another man and would like to try receiving. We are actively trying to find a couple or a man for an ongoing thing so hopefully when the time comes I'll be past the first time issues and can take on whatever the experience has to hold.

[dickhand]

I agree with Neo , let it go . Next time you won't be new at it anymore , lol . You'll get more comfortable as time goes on .

[whitehawk138]

Thank you once again. We are going to keep going. I am just going to relax and not stress this incident anymore. I guess I just needed to here it was normal lol. We are also going to try and get to know our next guy or couple prior to ease tensions and hopefully make a strong connection. I appreciate the feedback and I am glad I joined this site and spoke up.

[bityme]

Whitehawk,

Neo and Indy seem to be right on. It is not at all unusual to have first time jitters. From what you relate about the encounter, it appears that your primary intent was to make sure your wife received full enjoyment (good move, by the way). With your attention on her, even as you gave him oral, losing your erection is understandable and it is extremely difficult to maintain an erection if the guy is terrible at giving head. That probably heightened your attention to make sure he wasn't performing in a way that would detract from her enjoyment. Looking for a new third might not be a bad idea.

Next time you might try having your wife join you in giving your playmate head. Looking into a ladies eyes as your share a cock can be extremely erotic. Considering your private play with the wife later, it is obvious that she turns you on more than he did. Of course, there is a bond between husband and wife that you will never have with a third party and it's even greater and more special when you support and participate in each others fulfillment of your fantasies. Since you know she is turned on by the m2m activities, you might also try having her direct the action so that you and the playmate are doing what she will receive the most pleasure from. You might find that having her prompting you will raise the level of eroticism and allow you to get further into things. Take Indy's advice and discuss these options with her ahead of time.

It's great to see other couples enjoying their playtime together.

May all your encounters be joyous.

Pappy

[magari]

It happened to me when faced with fucking a guy for the first time....I was hard up to that point, but withered when he stuck his ass in the air and showed me his hole.
It was certainly first time jitters. I've overcome it now.