Funny things in porn, or stuff you have seen in porn that you found funny

[NMCowboys]

I know porn isn't real sex.

What are some things you have seen in porn that made you laugh since it's so unrealistic? Or stuff that you've seen in porn that you found funny?

I think it's funny how in heterosexual and "lesbian" porn (by "lesbian" porn I mean bi or lesbian porn made by straight men for straight men) they have bleached blond Valley girls screaming really loud when they get oral sex or get fucked when they're just faking orgasms and yelling stuff like "AHHHHHHHH AHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHH AHHHHHHHHHH (repeat 3x) YEAH I'M GONNA CUM!!!!!" :rolleyes:

In gay porn I have seen where the men last maybe 5 mins at most for oral or anal sex but it's edited and looped, or shown at various angles to make it seem longer, and how the men scream and get very loud during anal sex. It's also very strange how in gay porn they show guys who are shaved/waxed hairless twinks and roided out gym bunnies as though that's supposed to be sexy, hot, or they think that most bisexual and gay men want to see men like this and find them attractive.

The funniest thing ever is when porn tries to be all artsy or have a plot. When I watch porn I want to see people have sex not get bogged down by the person making it trying to be artsy, or by a silly plot or story.

The silly porn talk is also funny to me like when they say the usual BS like "OMG you're SOOOOOOO BIG! YOU'VE GOT THE BIGGEST COCK IN THE WORLD!" to a guy or when a man or woman takes it up the ass and you can tell they really don't like it or find it painful.

[liberlib]

Actually I find if funny (and eventually a turn off) when the man pumping his cock in the woman's vagina or man's ass with a look of boredom as if it is a job or with a slight edge of pain like it is labor then the film cuts in fashion to make it look like a shift in view point but actually is actors stopping and taking a coffee or smoke break then coming back to make it look like a marathon session.

[Hypersexual11]

Concerning sound, I mute porn, or put on music. Seems most of the stupid moaning is from a track and not the "actors". I find it a turn off. The only time I ever burst out laughing at porn was during a scene in a bathtub. Guy was getting head and JUST as he shot, he slipped in the tub and fell on the girl blowing him, cum shooting everywhere, everyone trying to recover, that was some funny shit.

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

Several years ago, the ex and I bought a tape of what appeared to be good porn. Someone had dubbed noises over the actual tape. I dont remember the name, but it had Ron Jeremy in it. I dont like him anyway, so this just made the whole movie That much more funny.
Ron was a Vampire stalking his lady Love, who was in a mental institution. He would come watch her at night before he was strong enough to do anything to her. As he was jacking off out side of her window,there was a sound like someone "Squeegie'ing" a windshield, and when he came, it sounded like a Chapaign(SP) cork popping. When he finally Was able to turn into a bat and fly, there was the sounds of something rusty and squeeky being heard. When he bit his lady, there was slurping noises over her moaning loudly. As he ate her in the forest (No pun intended) all you could hear was crickets, and when he flipped her over on her knees and began to take her, there was the sounds of bed springs..only she was bent over a fallen log in the forest. In the end, when he was drenched in sunlight, he swiftly whipped his cape up around himself and just as he burst into flames you heard "POOOF!"
It was so stupid that you could Help laughing your ass off, and couldnt stop watching! It had ceased to be erotic or arousing, it was just Bad Porn..lol
Still chuckloing Cat.

[Gearbox]

Me and a friend was watching a porno years ago just to see what the quality of the VHS tape was like (yes THAT long ago). The opening scene was a red sports car driving into a car park. Out gets the 'high class' lady in a fur coat, stilettos, miniskirt, sunglasses and £90 hairdo. The camera pans out to watch her walk the full length of the long car park towards it all in one take.
Well halfway across, she tripped over a brick.LOL But carried on as if nothing happened coz of the low budget.:bigrin: We were doubled up in stitches, and watched that part loads of times, it was so good. Wish I could remember the name.

[NMCowboys]

I have seen Japanese animated porn or Hentai and I find that hilarious. A friend of mine would apparently masturbate and get off to it since he found it a turn on but another friend and I watched some of the tapes he said were good and the stuff in La blue girl with giant squid was just odd and messed up, but we saw one where this guy and woman sneak into some abandoned building at some school or college and then she starts sucking him off and then disappears since she's a ghost.

I saw another one called Bible black where this one woman was dressed up like a rabbit and then she went to see a nurse, and the nurse was a demon hermaphrodite who fucked her with a penis that came out of her vagina, and then the nurse changed back into her human form and the bunny woman left like nothing had happened.

[Newly_Bi]

The "story", the "acting", and the noises are just funny to me. the screaming is so fake it's annoying so I always mute it.

[Newly_Bi]

I was watching this one video, during the cumshot, the girl was on her knees getting sprayed on her face, when it touched he lips, she gagged and tried to recover. I thought that was hilarious, here is a porn star with quite a few movies under her belt, and she was gagging off of a little bit of cum touching her mouth.

[Newly_Bi]

Is it just me or when chicks look all drugged out and/or are all screaming and have the most bored look on their face like the most annoying thing ever or what?

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

Most porn Is boring, Darlin. To them its just a job, and the sex is staged. I imagine it Would get old after a while....

[chicagom]

Many years ago I saw a flick where a woman was using a corn cob as a dildo. She was doing it so fast that eventually the corn started popping (remember this only a movie). The whole theater was laughing their asses off.

[NMCowboys]

Many years ago I saw a flick where a woman was using a corn cob as a dildo. She was doing it so fast that eventually the corn started popping (remember this only a movie). The whole theater was laughing their asses off.

That was in the adult version of the movie "Cinderella". I remember there was a really gross part where a woman's breasts were lactating and it showed the breast milk flying all around the screen.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cinderella_%281977_film%29

[chicagom]

I also worked at a place that repaired electronics. Back in the day, the biggest problem with VCR's was the tapes sticking inside the machine. Also, the majority of movies being watched were pornos. People would sheepishly bring their VCR's in figuring it would be a quick fix. We always kept them for at least 24 hours so the techs could duplicate the movies. The funny part was, they had the ability to play the tapes BACKWARDS. Nothing like the money shot in reverse, along with some other hysterical scenes. Then it was watching the faces of the people picking the VCR's....and the movies....up.

[snowcrazee]

I think the funniest thing I have seen so far in porn was in some movie my ex- had downloaded to watch. I don't remember the name of it and it only lasted about 20 minutes before it had to go or ruin the idea/mood. But the funniest part was when the lead male of the first scene, an MMF bi-threeway, was stroking himself at the end and shot himself right in the eye and nose, in a standing up position! It was a split second as if they tried to cut it from the scene but were rushed to produce so didn't quality inspect the film prior to releasing it. If you just watch you see it plain as day, but slowing it down and doing sports style commentary like John Madden reviewing a play is freakin' AWESOME... and hurt so bad. If I can remember the video name, I promise to post it as an edit! Now watching porn has a downside it didn't before because I always watch for the eye or nostril self-shot! Haha. Can you imagine the actors comments and teasing after the cut? "Nice shooting Tex", "Now do you see where you are cumming from?", "Mom always said it would make you go blind!", "Hell, we all did a line of coke before the scene, let's all do a line of jizz after!" Heh! Classic! If only it had been Ron Jeremy! That would have been talent! Gotta apply some "Spanklish" (ya know... like English... in pool/billiards - spin during the shot to force CueBall to curve as it travels, for any who don't know) to get it up and around the belly. Or bank shot! "Over the tits, off the vibrator, between the butt cheeks, thru the chest hair, nothing but facial!" heh heh! Anyway, best porn blooper I have seen so far! :)

[innaminka]

The (non) acting.

But then as Cat said, doing the same thing day after day, 9 to 5, it's like any job. Sometimes it's hard to be enthusiastic.

[zigzig]

I also find most porn boring. Like people have to scream of pleasure all the time. And some porn actors look so fake. Almost all women have fake boobs.