Retake: Shy bi guy with a question...or many

[devil_squid]

So the first time I must have had something in this topic to get banned, the mod didn't stipulate why.

Try #2:

I'm a MWM forward deployed on a base with a male:female ratio of close to 20:1, so it's full of cock everywhere. I just moved into a "room" with another guy from a different branch. He's also a MWM and decently attractive. I'm still in the "closet" when it comes to being bi, so how can I find out if he is bi/bi-curious as well? I need to have sexual gratification while I'm here, and it doesn't matter if it's a woman's mouth/pussy or a man's mouth/ass. I'm also orally vers and interested in pursuing anal vers, so it would be a win-win situation for the both of us.

Any assistance from y'all would be greatly appreciated; aside from "Just touch his ass/cock," or "Let him see you naked." These tend to scare rather than excite.

Also, I sleep naked and have slipped the covers to reveal my ass crack when I know he's awake, or about to return to the room. I'm unable to see his face when I do this though, as I'm "sleeping." He hasn't said anything after I've done this.

Don't ban me...:banghead:

[fredtyg]

It could be he's thinking the same thing about you: "How do I find out if that guy is bi?", but there's no way of knowing other than probably talking to him. What's worked for me in that past is to get to drinking a bit and then leading the conversation to sex. Once you find the right opening you might hint at sucking cock or having had a guy do you in the past.

Just be casual about it and don't make him feel you're trying to pressure him into fooling around. That could well scare him off even if he is bi or homo. Always leave him an out. Let him know about you but don't pressure him. Leave the next move up to him.

[chtampa]

Mention that you were in a threesome with a couple and see what direction his questions go. That would be easier to accept than making a direct pass.

[fredtyg]

Mention that you were in a threesome with a couple and see what direction his questions go. That would be easier to accept than making a direct pass.

That's a great one.

[Realist]

I was in the military back when you could go to jail, if caught in a same-gender situation. Still, I had three successful, although very secret, relationships in 7 years.

If I was interested in anyone, I never made blatant suggestive comments, or out-right physical moves. I moved slowly, and only took things to the next step, if the person seemed open to more discussion and/or physical contact. If they didn't react violently, to conversations about "someone I knew" type of stories, I would gradually reveal more of my intentions. Before long, you should know how they feel about what ever you're interested in, then you can take appropriate action!

This system helped me weed out two, who I first thought might be interested, but proved not to be. No one's feelings were hurt and they really never knew what I was geared up for.

I know rules are much more relaxed, these days, but (still) there are those, who could react in vicious ways, if they are firmly ensconced in heterosexuality.

It's best to know who's your enemy and who's not, before making any moves at all!

Good luck; I hope you find what you need with as little fanfare as possible!

And, thanks for your service!

[devil_squid]

It could be he's thinking the same thing about you: "How do I find out if that guy is bi?", but there's no way of knowing other than probably talking to him. What's worked for me in that past is to get to drinking a bit and then leading the conversation to sex. Once you find the right opening you might hint at sucking cock or having had a guy do you in the past.

Just be casual about it and don't make him feel you're trying to pressure him into fooling around. That could well scare him off even if he is bi or homo. Always leave him an out. Let him know about you but don't pressure him. Leave the next move up to him.

Unfortunately, there is no drinking here, so it rules that out. Thanks for the info tho.

[devil_squid]

If I was interested in anyone, I never made blatant suggestive comments, or out-right physical moves. I moved slowly, and only took things to the next step, if the person seemed open to more discussion and/or physical contact. If they didn't react violently, to conversations about "someone I knew" type of stories, I would gradually reveal more of my intentions. Before long, you should know how they feel about what ever you're interested in, then you can take appropriate action!

I like this approach the best, as of right now, but what could I use as the opening? I've worked with gay/bi guys and my sister-in-law is lesbian.


I know rules are much more relaxed, these days, but (still) there are those, who could react in vicious ways, if they are firmly ensconced in heterosexuality.

Don't Ask, Don't Tell has been repealed to meet the EEO standards, but that is old news.

[Realist]

Devil wrote: "Don't Ask, Don't Tell has been repealed to meet the EEO standards, but that is old news."

I know, but I saw recent reports of incidents on the news, where soldiers, or a soldier, beat a gay soldier to death.

http://abcnews.go.com/US/story?id=96466&page=1#.UcrG9NLVBrc

Apparently, the British Army had similar incidents and Prince Harry supposedly stopped one attack, personally.

http://www.military.com/daily-news/2013/06/12/gay-soldier-prince-harry-saved-me-from-beating.html

I would still advise you to use discretion and not flaunt your bisexuality.

[devil_squid]

I don't flaunt it. Only 1 co-worker knows, and that was by accident. She's lesbian and was at a club I went to with a TS. She's not going to say anything. As far as other coworkers go, the know I'm married so think I'm straight; as I act straight.

[devil_squid]

Any more ideas? I'd like to read more opinions.

[fredtyg]

Devil wrote: "Don't Ask, Don't Tell has been repealed to meet the EEO standards, but that is old news."
I know, but I saw recent reports of incidents on the news, where soldiers, or a soldier, beat a gay soldier to death.

Not only that but even bi and homo guys can react negatively if they feel threatened in being found out. My own experience was way back when you could get thrown out for being queer, but that wasn't on my mind when I had my negative reaction.

I'd gone to the local steam baths- a well known queer hangout in town- a few times. This was back in the 70s. Unbeknownst to me, a guy in a separate National Guard unit- a full timer, in fact- had seen me there. I had no idea he had.

So we're at one of my first annual training periods. It was night and I was walking from one area of the base to another. Out of the darkness the approaches me. I'm guessing he'd been following me. He says, "Hey, I've seen you at the steam baths". He's obviously making a move on me, but I'm not in queer mode at all. I just say real fast, "Yeah, I just go there for the steam", and almost run away from him.

I was in full hetero mode and the thought of fooling around with him on a military base scared the crap out of me at the time. I'm sure others might have reacted more violently in the same situation if they thought they might be exposed as being queer.

[fredtyg]

Any more ideas? I'd like to read more opinions.

I've thought about this a bit since you brought it up. I'm not sure if your roommate and you live under the same conditions I did when I was in Saudi Arabia. We had two guys to one room. We slept a few feet apart from each other on the few days we had the same hours. That was rare.

I also got to thinking that one thing even a lot of straight guys do is jack off together. I've heard quite a few stories along that line. If that's the case in your situation, how about bringing up jacking off?

Might not work if you don't see him that often but, if you work the same hours, mention it's kinda hard to find time to jack off when you have so little time alone. Something along that line, anyway. Maybe he'll say something along the line of him not caring if you jack off when he's around. If it goes that way, go ahead and jack in front of him and see how he reacts to it.

If he seems cool with it maybe you can get him to jack with you. Once you get to that point I would think half the battle is won, assuming he's at all oriented toward m2m stuff. Next step might be seeing if he'll let you jack him. Either that, or when he cums, ask if you could taste some of his cum. If he goes along with that, I'd say you're pretty much there.

Good thing about an approach like that is you haven't exposed yourself as queer until it's really too late for him to say anything to anybody. What's he going to do? Tell someone the two of you were jacking off together and you asked if you could taste his cum? That might make him look queer.

Try the jacking off angle. Might be a great way to start.

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

You could casually mention that you are horny as hell, and miss your wife...lol. That might get him opened up and talking. Whatever way you go Hon, be careful.
Cat

[devil_squid]

We are in a similar set-up. It's a converted shipping container with 2 men in it. Why's everything got to be so damned difficult? HAHA...that is half the fun tho

[fredtyg]

Had a feeling you might be using the conex containers. We had those in Saudi, too, but I never was quartered in one.

I liked Cat's idea about just saying you're horny as hell, although I wouldn't bring the wife up. Mentioning her would be counterproductive. It is a way to lead the conversation in the right direction, though.

[Neonaught]

I was in a similar situation back in the late 80's when I was serving the 3rd Marine Division as a Navy Hospital Corpsman. My roommate was a cute younger very twinkish guy who I got a strong gay vibe from. I am bi but was *very* closeted in the military. I walked into our room one day after he had been on the night watch and was allowed to sleep days to find him sound asleep on his bunk totally nude and hard as a rock. His cock was absolutely gorgeous! I had no idea if he ended up that way intentionally or not. We were the only 2 people in the barracks that day and could have had plenty of time for an uninterrupted encounter. I decided that discretion was the better part of valor and did nothing. To this day I still think about that moment and question whether I should have made a move.

[mike1]

I'm much older than you, have never been in the military, and am more gay than bi, so maybe I'm out of touch, but here's my two cents' worth: It would make me uncomfortable to share sleeping quarters with someone who was warm for my form if I wasn't warm for his. I don't like being hit on by guys I'm not attracted to or by women (which does happen occasionally). How would you like it?

If the male:female ratio on your base is 20:1, surely there are other guys available with whom you don't share such intimate quarters. What's the matter with pursuing one of them?

Gays have spent decades securing acceptance to serve openly in the military. Finally Don't' Ask Don't Tell gets repealed. Why reward straight soldiers for their newfound tolerance by hitting on them?

Still, I have no idea what it's like for you. Maybe young straight soldiers really just are not uptight at all and wouldn't be bothered by an invitation like you describe. It's only my limited perspective I'm offering.

[fredtyg]

I don't like being hit on by guys I'm not attracted to or by women (which does happen occasionally). How would you like it?
Gays have spent decades securing acceptance to serve openly in the military.Why reward straight soldiers for their newfound tolerance by hitting on them?


That's a real good point. That's why I think it's always best to be subtle in letting the guy know what you're interested in and that you're available. And always leave him an easy out. Even if it's not a big scene, just him finding out you're bi or homo can be awkward. Probably not as much, though, if all you do is drop fairly obvious hints about yourself.

If you're subtle, and he doesn't feel he's being hit on, he might just let it go, so long as you two get along ok anyway.

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

lol My Ex husband was in Lima 3/4, 3rd Mar Div, and was homophobic as hell! He'd come home and tell me there was a guy in his barracks that he suspected was "Something wrong with him" even tho the guy was a Gorgeous. hugely build Marine. Nothing about his outward appearance said Bi or Gay, but I always got a little turned on (Ok Ok..A Lot) at the thought of that big muscular monster chowing down on another man's hard cock. The last day of my stay in Okinawa, I gave friend's hugs goodbye and whispered 'Damn, I would have liked seeing you sucking on Sarge's hard cock just Once in my lifetime!"
I thought this big man was going to burn up with embarrassment..LOl He just grinned and whispered back "Me too! I would Loved to have had you watch me!"
He definitely put the Oooooo! in OORAH! lol
Laughing Cat (And still a little turned on at the thought>:}

[elian]

Cat! My gooodness, you seem to have a knack for knowing what to say to get a person's blood circulating! One might think you've had experience writing these sort of things before.. :BIG SMILE: (nuzzles)