When and how did you know? [Archive]

View Full Version : When and how did you know?

kittles555

Jun 16, 2005, 10:42 PM

curious42

Jun 17, 2005, 8:17 PM

I can't remember when I thought about being with another woman. I guess most of my adult life.

I love sex with a man, but would love to know what another woman looks like inside. I want to touch & feel her lips and really explore her all the way.

I would also like to know what it would be like to have another woman do this to me.

I have not met a woman that I am attracted to yet, just want to experience it at least once. :tongue: :female: :bigrin: :tongue:

WolffeWoman42

Jun 18, 2005, 11:25 AM

Hi Kittles,

In hindsight, I see I've always been attracted to women but never reacted because of the stigma of taboo. Then one day I met a very special man who asked, "Would you like to play with my wife?"
Until that point, I'd never really thought of it. He became my best friend and mentor. We were aiming for a three-way relationship :bibounce: but it didn't work out.
Anyway, when I made love to her for the first time, they both asked if I'd ever done it with another woman before. :tongue: Though I was unsure at first, my passions guided me and it was the most natural thing in the world.
Unfortunately, my mentor/lover lives so far away I've had to try to learn the bisexual ropes on my own which isn't easy. I have difficulty approaching women.
Contrary to popular belief though, it isn't just sex. I miss the unique connection two women share. It is something you can't understand until you experience it.

Good luck on your bisexual journey.

Dawn

Ratchick

Jun 18, 2005, 9:17 PM

How did I know....
With me, it was a realisation 20 years in the making.
Now, That I am fully-"Aware", I look back at my life and realise all the signals and behaviors were there I just had to recognise them.
I dated women in High School and college, but hadn't had a full-on sexual experience. I met my Now Ex-husband, and held-off on any further "Research", until One day I left him.
All the things that had been in the back of my mind...women I notced when I was out and about, women I admired and had crushes on in the media, fantasies I had all surfaced.
I met a woman online who is Bi, and married. We met, and I knew RIGHT there I was Bi. I waned her so badly. Our first sexual encounter came so naturally to me. It lasted hours, and the passion was so real and intense. It was like nothing I have ever experienced before. We had a breif realtionship, and it "proved" to me that I wanted a woman sexually.
I haven't looked back since. Sex with woman is so...amasing, sensual, and satisfing. I hope to find this again soon :)
Now 31, I mourn the years I spent locked-up in my head.
I only wish I had been more sure, sooner in life.
hugs,
RC :bipride:

hypershot

Jun 19, 2005, 7:23 AM

Hey,

Im only 20 years old and have only begin to full realise that I am bi. It all started when one of friends came out a few years ago. I'd always been able to look at a guy and not be disgusted by the thought of any sexual relations, and I could clearly answer to them being handsome/cute or not. I only found out recently, and through searching the web I came across this site. For me this site has opened me up to the world around me much more than any other experience has.

I am still to be with a guy completely, but I have done enough to know that im bi and that suits me fine.

From being here I have made many new friends and got close to someone too.

So have fun and enjoy,

Love Chris

xXx

Flounder1967

Jun 19, 2005, 4:17 PM

I knew along time age that I might be gay, but I knew I liked women also. I first started with a male friend when I was about 13-14 ans that lasted until he moved away whin I wa about 17. I never let anyone know because of a the stigmatism that is attached with being gay. I didn't have sex with woman until I was 21. I liked it, but I wanted more. I did talk to her about it, but she didn't understand. I then meet my wife and knew she won't understand it either. So I keep it from her. I have been with one other male since I was with her. It helped me understand that I wasn't gay, but bi. I love my wife I may never tall her. But I don't want to abuse trust we have. Unless she gives me go ahead, and understands that, I will be in the closet until then. I know that she won't understand until I tell her. I'm not ready to do that at this point.

summergirl75

Jun 20, 2005, 1:28 PM

There had always been something there for me with women, but i didn't explore it, it all seemed to hard. Eventually i became involved with a woman and it was so different to any relationship i had ever had with a man and so refreshing. Since my relationship with her ended i have led a varied life and for the best part i am comfortable and open about it. I did however come up against some prejudice and I found that very difficult. I have always had the view that if you're attracted to someone it doesn't matter if they happen to be male or female. With relationships it's all about who you connect with, to have that put into question was hard and still is. I'm not sure i'll ever have this completely figured out in my head.

softfruit

Jun 22, 2005, 2:08 PM

When my big sister (also bi) lent me a copy of the book, "Oranges are not the only fruit". I'd evidently been bi since I was eleven and first started getting feelings of attraction towards anyone at all, but the book gave me some words to work with and the belief that normal people could be queer, not just camp men on television.

theloner9109

Jun 23, 2005, 8:13 AM

To be honest with myself, I'd say I always knew I wasn't like the rest of the guys - not just in attractions and sexuality but other signs like the way I act, my lack of interest in sports, competitiveness, etc; Basically society told me I wasn't masculine enough to be straight. Whatever.

However soon I realized I was attracted to other guys, and occasionally would fantasize about kissing, etc; etc;, you get the point.

My whole life I'd been able to tell you if a guy was hot or not but I never really thought much of it for that fact that I'm attracted to girls as well.

And here I am today, trying to figure it all out lol! :bigrin:

mike9753

Jun 23, 2005, 3:48 PM

biman50

Jun 24, 2005, 1:52 AM

I remember very clearly the day I realized I was probably bi. I was in my mid-40s, and I was on a long car trip by myself. I was having yet another of my man-to-man sex fantasies as I drove along, and I was also thinking about the woman I was dating at the time. I'd told her about my gay fantasies, and at first, it'd turned her on. After a few months of us talking about it and her even taking me to a gay dance club a few times, she decided she didn't like the idea of me thinking about sex with another guy. After that, I didn't want to talk to her anymore about it, and I retreated back into my private fantasy life of gay sex. But I also kept thinking about whether I was really gay or if something else was going on.

Part of me really craved the idea of having sex with another man. And by my 40s, I'd begun to notice men in public who I found attractive -- something I'd never allowed myself to consider when I was younger. But at the same time, I loved women. (Hell, I'd been married to two of them by then -- not at the same time, btw.) I loved women, and I loved sex with women -- I still do. I knew I wasn't gay, or at least not "gay gay," if there is such a thing, but why was this idea of gay sex so strong in me, I kept thinking. Then one day when I was on that long road trip, it hit me. "I'm bisexual," I thought to myself.

It was as if the sky opened up, and God himself turned on a light in my head. It was like a spiritual epiphany. All of a sudden, I had an answer that made sense. I ended up telling all of this to my girlfriend (against my better judgement), and true to form, she tried to argue me out of it. So I gave up once again and kept my mouth shut after that.

She and I eventually broke up, and somewhere in there, I finally had real-life sex with a man I met online. It wasn't very satisfying, but it wasn't bad enough to make me rule out another try at some point in the distant future. If there ever is a next time, I hope I end up with a man who's more compatible with me than the first one was.

Today, I'm in a relationship with yet another woman, and I'm very happy with her. I haven't told her about my bi side yet. I don't know if I ever will, but I do know I don't want to do anything that would cause her pain or jeopardize our relationship.

Still, it's nice to stop in here and read about people in their profiles and see what everyone is posting in the forums. I guess it helps remind me that I'm not the only one who feels this way.

That's my two cents. Sorry for the long post.

P.S.: Two quick notes to Drew: First of all, thanks for all of your hard work on this site. I really do appreciate it. And second, I can't get on the new chat software because I'm a Mac guy using System 9, but I'm planning an upgrade in a few weeks, so I'm hoping that'll take care of it. Thanks again.

vera ly

Jun 24, 2005, 12:10 PM

When I fell in love with HER!!!She was going through a tough period and I followed her there and then to my total bewilderment I realized that all those feelings were not friendship any longer...but love....and my God what crazy love...one that led us through hell and back...still going on 5 years later but it's still not complete(for whatever that means) as she is more hetero ...
Anyway another best friend story ...started with a kiss...

fallingindefinitely

Jun 24, 2005, 2:21 PM

I never full out "knew" that I was a version of gay until I was 17, when I really hit on another girl for the first time. We ended up going out for over a year.

When I was 14, my biology teacher told my class to write letters to our senior selves. You know, write a letter that you'll re-open in four years when you graduate. Mine had "Am I gay? ...Maybe." on the back of it. So I've had inklings since I was 14.

I also had an experience when I was 7, playing house with another girl. We ended up sleeping in the same bed and trying to do what mommies and daddies did when they thought we were asleep. I almost kissed her, but my dad came in to check that we weren't setting the house on fire. He asked what we were doing in the same sleeping bag, on a twin-sized bed, in the middle of the day... I instantly replied that we were napping and had gotten cold. He just grinned and said "Have fun!" If only he knew... Hehehe.

So I guess that I've always sort of "known," but only recently have I come to understand precisely what it is. And it's never been a problem for me like it has been for other people. I've never had denial issues, psychological freak-outs, or anything of that sort. It was kind of a relief when I finally understood what I was, actually. Sort of like "Oooh! That explains a LOT." I'm just lucky like that, I guess.

Bi-ten

Jun 25, 2005, 12:13 AM

There are so many great posts on this topic and so many things I can relate to. I find it interesting how over the years (for me) there were so many clues to my sexuality, yet I seemed to shrug them off. 'No, I can't be gay', I thought, 'I love women too much'! Yet always little clues, like how it would be interesting to kiss a certain guy, or how great it would be if a man joined my wife and I during sex. 'Just fantasies', I thought, no harm there.

Well after a while the fantasies became stronger, and a good ladyfriend of mine suggested I might be bisexual...Only then did I allow myself to consider the possibility that I might not be straight, or gay... but something in between.

Like many people I thought things had to be black or white.. it was such a relief to know it was alright to be grey. When I finally accepted myself for what I was, it was like a wieght was lifted from me... everything made so much sense, and I embraced myself with joy and understanding.

I have since been lucky enough to meet a fantastic guy, he had his revelation some years ago, and much like me, he has accepted who he is without question. He is like a mentor to me, and knock on wood, things are going well. Being with him has been unbelievable, I had no idea how wonderful it could be to be with another man.

I hope that you all find what your looking for too, its not always easy but damn it can be interesting!

Hugs,

Bi-ten :flag3:

garik

Jun 25, 2005, 4:29 AM

To be honest, I have no memory of not having sexual feelings - and the feelings I've had have always been for both genders. Looking back, I suspect I matured rather sooner than almost all my classmates anyhow, at least physically. There was never a sense of sudden realisation - but then how many straight men remember the day they first found a girl attractive and realised they were straight? It was the same with me. I went through a brief period (for about a year when I was 17-18) of telling myself I was fooling myself and that I was really gay - I think this gave me a better sense of identity at the time. But it didn't last long...

moongirl

Jun 25, 2005, 7:20 AM

undefined
Thanks for your question - I happened upon this site last nite and on the impulse joined, but am feeling a little shy wierdly enough!
I'm 39, it has taken me the last 15 years to understand my sexuality (slooooow learner). I became aware of feeling attracted to another woman in my mid-20s, it freaked me out as I was (still am) married and in a very hetero lifestyle. Over the years I've been interested in other women, had the odd crush, and often picked up the "vibe" - you know, met another woman and sensed an energy and then found out she was gay. For a long time I've fantasized about women, read erotic lit., etc. Last year I had my first experience with a woman, met thru the net, with my partner's knowledge, and that lasted about 6 months although she was out-of-town so we could only see each other a couple of times a month (lots of phone calls and texting tho). The experience reaffirmed everything I felt about myself and finally I've self-identified as bi. Still big issues in my marriage over this issue - won't go there right now! I really miss the connection with her - ending it has been so painful - - like I think wolffewoman said, there's something about being with another woman that's so totally different - for me it was the combination of sexual intimacy with the usual female friendship intimacy that was so amazing - no performance issues, very equal, just really open, we had alot of fun discovering each other and laughing when we were still trying to work out what to do!!!
I'm enjoying reading the responses from others - sometimes I just think this is all in my head and why don't I let this go instead of potentially F*#$@ up my life (which overall is a good one).
Enough. Wish you well on your journey. :rolleyes:

pmk7480

Jun 25, 2005, 7:39 AM

i was 14 or so. a friend had his shirt off and i caught myself staring at his shoulder of all things. i thought nothing of it at the time, but the image sticks with me. not too long after i was having fantasies involving him. it was strange, because i had never been comfortable with the idea of being with a guy, but it felt safe and right as a private fantasy.

in college, while dating a bisexual woman, for a short while we were seeing a mutual male friend. it was only phyisical then, but i think i was still exploring and not comfortable. and one other good friend and i were together for a short while in the same way.

a few years later now, i find myself drawn to have a relationship with a guy. maybe i'm finally comfortable with the idea, and want to discover what else there might be. mostly, i want to know a guy on a deep emotional level, something i can never do with only a friend.

chillddreamer

Jun 26, 2005, 4:57 PM

When I first relized that my life was in a lifestyle change was March 2005 I was talking to a close friend of mine and I just blurtted out that I was curious about females. That I wanted to taste them and feel them. I am not sure if this will seem funny or discusting but I like the way I taste after a guy has been doing his thing. He comes up adn kissed me i think it is very yummy and started thinking about the pleasure of being with a girl and I found very arousing. I still have not been with one but I hope to find one soon.

Akuma_Kijin

Jun 27, 2005, 8:13 AM

I found out when I was about 16 years old (so not that long ago). Me and a male friend where visiting my aunt, it was late and my aunt was gone on a fishing trip. So we where sitting there just talking, I knew he was bisexual he was very open about it. Any way we where talking and I looked over towards him and it was like something just flipped in my head. I found him attractive. I mean I had thoughts before like "if only one of us was born female" and things of that nature. Any way I revelled my feelings to him and he said that he felt the same. We went out for a while but eventually ended it. Me and he are still very good friends though.

keg1966

Jun 27, 2005, 7:59 PM

For me, it's hard to tell. I realized that I was attracted to men in college. I also felt an attraction to women. However, in college, I looked at things in black and white. I felt that being bisexual was destructive and I could not deny my attraction to men. Being gay meant that I didn't have to deal with the fear of rejection from a woman, which was my greatest fear. I let that fear get the best of me. So, I decided I was gay, which was a big mistake.

I never really felt comfortable with the label. I knew, subconsciously, that the gay label was not right for me. None of my relationships with men worked, in part, majorly, because I was supressing my attraction to women. When I trashed the label, I felt better which was when I was 33. Now, the dilemma is how do I tell perspective female partner's that I'm attracted to me?

I'll save that for another post. I don't want to make my answer too long.

mike9753

Jun 28, 2005, 9:48 AM

In the 1960's I went to a gay bath house in St. Louis, MO while I was in college. That was my forst time with a man. I had a gf back home, so I never revealed it or acted out any activities with a guy.

Then when my marriage was going south - my wife was beginning to work thru childhood issues - a physically abusive, alcoholic mother - I tried again and met a guy who tried to fuck me. It was consensual and he was gentle but I was too uptight. That was in my mid 30's.

I got divorced and dated a lot of women, and found my current wife. We married after 2 yrs. of very steamy, hot sex. She was a tiger. We tried all sorts of things, including a little cross-dressing, some dildo penetration (of me), and she once fucked me (totally unsuccessful experience) with a strap-on.

After we got married she stopped all the kinky stuff. I love her, but I miss the playfulness and experimentation. Now, due to a medical problems, she is never interested in sex. My interest in Bi activities has increased. I dont' know if I am horney and so "...any port in a storm" or if I am bi sexual.

I got into an email exchange with a guy who, like me, is married, and who like me is interested in doing something. But as we got closer and closer to arranging a meeting, he suddenly dropped off the map. So I don't really know.

I wanted to add that I was in a health club about 8 yrs. ago. I worked out there or played squash there 7 days a week. One day this guy came in as a new member. I saw him in the shower. He had a very long dick. I have seen longer, but his whole package - face, torso, gentials, legs - everything was very attractive.

He noticed me looking and paid particular attention to washing his cock so I could get a good look across the shower room. I stopped looking and went into the steam room. At this point I was not conscious of what I was actually doing - except I felt a sense of guilt at staring at his cock. He followed me in and we sat there - across from each other. I was secretly happy he came in, and I kept my eyes closed but couldn't help but peek now and then. His cock just flopped on the side of his thigh and sometimes it stirred a bit and got semi-hard - tumescent.

I don't know how long we stayed in there, but I know I kept getting hard and had to hide my erection between my legs. He couldn't help but notice and he stayed. Interestingly, I can't remember looking to see if was looking at me or my cock.

I left after a time, but we ran into each other a few more times. I don't remember how it happened but we did start to talk and he revealed to me that he was gay. I gave him a ride to pickup his motorcycle and we ended up talking. I actually asked him if we could get together and he was cautious and agreed but wanted me to be sure it was what I really wanted.

I was married and I decided that even tho I was very attracted to him and excited about the idea of having sex with him, I did not want to do anything to hurt my wife or jepordize my marrieage so I thanked him for his caution and agreed that it was not a good idea. He disappeared after that - never saw him again. BUT, that was when I realized that I was Bisexual - I have not acted on it since then, because I am in a committed relationship to a wonderful woman. But this forum has really helped me to at least talk about my fantasies. My thanks to Drew!

chillddreamer

Jun 28, 2005, 1:56 PM

joey1403

Jun 28, 2005, 3:15 PM

for me it was when i got off with an older woman when i was 18, i went back to her place and she had her husband there. she asked if he could join in and I said yes, i dont know why but it just didn't bother me, i thought it would but it didn't and I enjoyed most of it (i dont like givin) I am 30 now and have had very few bi experinaces and would like more. I am still not comfortable to have a gay experinace without a female being there also, even if she is just watching

whiskey_girl54

Jul 3, 2005, 4:44 AM

Hey Everyone,

I was thinking about it today and i remembered myself in kindergarden, I wrote a note to a friend and wanted to tell her i loved her (my mom added "as a friend" lol), and when i was in elementary and middle schools i sometimes would develope these little "interests"(for lack of a better term) on some of the female teachers .I went through puberty like a typical girl obsessing over hot guy movie stars but also on hot female movie stars (which i thought nothing of at the time). I started thinking that i might be bisexual when i was fifteen, my friend had just come out to me and i told her i might be too and no sooner had the words come out of my mouth than it REALLY hit me that it might be true and when i was seventeen i knew it, i realized that i looked at ,fantasized about, and wanted to date girls as well as guys.

See Y'all Later, Happy 4th and Happy belated Canada Day,XOXO
:female: :flag1:

Bum_Ditty

Jul 5, 2005, 3:23 AM

I was in my senior year in high school (more than thirty years, where did the time go...), and found myself lusting for both the girl whom I was dating and an extremely sexy boy (who was known to be "funny," as the saying went back then) in choir class.

I treasure both memories; both were sweet awakenings. The angst of keeping it all a secret (even now, my parents and most of my former classmates have no clue --so far as I can tell, at any rate) was and often still is horrific, but it becomes bearable over time, and having a forum such as this is a godsend.

Bum_Ditty

rupertbare

Oct 11, 2005, 9:34 AM

I found myself being attracted to other boys from the age of around about 15/16 but didn't actually have any physical intimacy with another guy until I was 27!!
I knew that I was bi rather than gay for the simple reason of having had girlfriends and sex with them that was totally satisfying - I just happened to find certain guys attractive in a purely lustful way!! lol!!
My first male lover was also my first wife's boyfriend (we had one of those early '70's "open marriages" - total disaster - you have to be a very strong and of a certain mind set to be able to handle that type of relationship - we couldn't {boo hoo - it left me broken-hearted}) - but this is another issue.
So I always answer the question of "how long have you been/known you were bi" with the same answer - all my life. The only difficulty of "knowing" in the mid-1960's in the UK was that until the Winter of 1967 sex acts between two (or more!! lol!!!) men was illegal and one could go to prison!! I remember being asked in 1972 by a GAY (Good As You - the original UK homosexual equality campaign) activist is I was gay - came as a shock (the term Gaydar was many years off in the future!!) - did I look/act gay? But he was really sweet and just explained that he always made passes at guys he fancied with that question. So, gosh, other guys might find me an object of sexual desire - I went home happy that night - a confirmation of sexuality.
I should also add that for my first male lover it was his first time as well and over a period of months I fell in love with him. Sex with no emmotional feedback is very difficult for some of us - we stayed friends for several years before he left the UK to live in Australia.

Peace and Love

Rupe.

Damon

Oct 12, 2005, 5:26 AM

Appart from being attracted to other boys muscles as a young boy of 10 + I never did realise at the time that this was the beginning of a progressive attraction to very specific males.. you know, the quality ones..

It wasn't until i was 17 that i remember been blown away by this older guy's smile.. I was at work one day and saw him standing there for about 20 mins.. I kept making excuses to pass by him or have him in my sights and I found myself trying to smile back in the way that he did.. This was my first attempt at flirting with someone of the same sex..

In fact, i immediately tried to tell a friend of mine not but 5 mins after he left but i cant remember why i couldnt.. i guess i sensed it was not the right thing to say at the right time..

After that, evry 6 months or so i would see another guy that blew my mind away and had me almost hypnotised with interest, no matter what i was doing at that moment i would break away from the activity and just stare with my natural cute smile hoping he would look my way.. If my friends asked me what the f**k i was doing I would tell them I thought I saw a girl i was crazy about lol ahhhh youth :)

Then at the age of 23 i moved to germany to work for a few months and in the house beside me was a gay portugese man.. he was kinda cute but i think it was the fact that I knew he was gay that attracted me to him.. well, i openly sought after him but did not think about how i looked at the time when it came to attracting him back.. lol i was hairy at that stage of my life (i mean my facial hair) lol and so i did not score.. but it was a big step in my acceptance..

I returned to germany to work the following year this time for the sole purpose of seeking a guy without the distractions of my home town.. hahahah the day before i left to return to Ireland i met the first and incidentally the only gay couple that lived in the village i was staying. But a Bi was born.. that was earlier this year.. i came home to Ireland.. Infatuated a young lady and after a few months realised that it was a mans turn to give me what I wanted.. So i finished with her..

And here I am :)

2curioustwo

Oct 12, 2005, 8:29 AM

I remember enjoying perving on guys from the same age as i enjoyed perving on girls, about 12yo. I always enjoyed playing with my ass too and would imagine it was another guy. Its more of a sexual thing for me, couldn't quite imagine actually falling in love with a man (but I prefer my lovers to be friends, not really into one night stands). I'm married and have been for many years, and love sex with women too. I have had a couple of m-m experiences and enjoyed them, there was a sense of relief that it did feel right. My wife knows I'm bi and is pretty supportive. Apart from telling her I'm still "in the closet", haven't told friends and family because I'm sure a few of each would flip!

Since changing my personal label for myself from "curious" to "Bi" I feel more comfortable with who I am. Now if only I we can find a couple for a bi foursome....

Mistya

Oct 13, 2005, 10:18 AM

For me,

I started to develope crushes on girls and boys when I was around ten...innocent little crushes, but still I knew I was suppose (since i was a little girl) to be crushing on the boys that my girl friends were pointing out. Yea, they might have been cute but so were the girls...lol

All through my life it has been just that...I am attracted to either gender and cherish my friendships with both. ;)

nubiwoman

Oct 13, 2005, 2:46 PM

given your username and your above comments10yo-bi i just wonder how old you are Hun?

julie :bigrin:

Damon

Oct 14, 2005, 1:20 AM

given your username and your above comments10yo-bi i just wonder how old you are Hun?

julie :bigrin:

Yes I am curious to know also..

Damon

Hades

Oct 14, 2005, 4:43 AM

Well, I had dicovered when I was in a friend's house orgy..., people began to practice sex and I had made a trio with some ones, well, it started as natural as my first time with a girl, so I had no problem in continue, I really enjoy

m.in.heels&hose

Oct 16, 2005, 10:42 AM

Hello all
i think i was destined to be bi, as a young child (5 or 6) i would lay in my bed and wish that i could go from boy to girl at will and when i "changed" no one would tell something had happened, i was always a little jealous of the pretty clothes the girls could wear and i was told boys DID NOT wear those same clothes (to me this was mind boggling) and it was also way before the time that i knew the differances under those clothes too

but when i was 15 or 16 my "suspictions" were comfirmed i was caught in nothing more than my heels&hose, while listening to music with head phones on in my bedroon, by a family friends son (who was told to go on into my bedroom by my mom)

when he saw me and what i was wearing, he took full advantage of my predictament and forced himself onto me

the "long & short" of it after it was all done, i wanted more, much more and i have concidered myself bisexual from that day on

And i would like to add, it was only until i found this great site that i have felt the most comfortable in my life about being bisexual

thank you for letting me have my say here
m.in.heels&hose

Chaia

Oct 16, 2005, 11:59 AM

Looking back, I realize it was in gym class in 7th grade. We were doing a swim unit and a girl was changing back into her clothes. Instead of covering all up like the rest of us and changing under her shirt, she was putting on her jeans with no top. You know how you sometimes have to jump up and down to get the jeans on...well, I noticed. Then she noticed me noticing and said, "What are you looking at?" I quickly turned away and didn't say anything--she was an 8th grader after all. Also, at about the same time, lusting after Red Sonja (remember that movie?) was a clue. :)
Chaia

Ratchick

Oct 16, 2005, 8:26 PM

Wonder woman at 8 Years old.....That twirling and twirling.....I was in love with Linda Carter. Hee hee
-RC

Bicuriousity

Oct 22, 2005, 11:34 AM

You know it is tough to tell what made me fantasize about a guy first, but it did start when i was like 14 or 15 and horny as hell. I was a virgin and wanted sex so bad that I fantasized about fucking and being fucked by my male friends as well. I did prefer girls, but couldn't stop masturbation about them.

I was shy around women and lost my real virginity around 23 with an older lady. But the bi fantasies still continued. When gay.com came about and I was about 27 I started chatting. I met a couple of guys and at first wasn't into them, only into masculine guys. Then I met a guy that I had a ton of fun with.

The crazy part is I fantasize more about guys, but in real life most of the experiences are less than satisfying. I know I'm attracted to way less men than women and that's part of it.

Oh one other big thing. When I started working out and buying some of the muscle mags, I got real attracted to the male body.

But its not the male bodybuilders i'm attracted to per se, i love the male underwear models though. Hot (maybe it's why i buy so much hot underwear now)

cutiepie35

Oct 22, 2005, 12:17 PM

I found a romance novel in a box of kids books in sixth grade, the plot of the story was a college student spending the summer in a rented house on the shore and her relationships with both her male and female roommates. I had been struggling with my "crushes" on both boys and girls and until I read that book I wasn't aware that I could have both. now some 20 years later I am slowly coming to terms with my desires.

strawberry8302

Oct 22, 2005, 6:31 PM

I'm only 18, but thinking back, I started developing attractions for other females when I was 12. Even though I was only 12, I was having sex with other girls, and I enjoyed it-but I could never be a lesbian. Loving men is 70% of my bisexuality. I have only just recently realized that I am bisexual, and I am currently looking for another female to share my wildest fantasies with. Now that I am an experienced older woman, I have not had any sexual relationships with any females. I guess I realized that when I found this site.
Thanks, bisexual.com!

Lorcan

Oct 22, 2005, 6:55 PM

oooooh i guess it was when i was 9 and was fantasizing about Captian Kirk and his many alien women! In my fantasies i was alternitively Captain Kirk with the woman, or the woman with Captain Kirk... I was both a man and a woman and i could be with either.

I was fine with how i was, but i realized that everyone else was not. So at the time i thought that i could never tell anyone else. Such a lonely way to grow up. I tried to come out to a friend in highschool, but she stopped me and said, "Don't tell me; I don't want to know". I finally came out to my friends in college. They were much more supportive.

And now i'm married to another bisexual!

codybear3

Oct 22, 2005, 11:31 PM

I knew I was bisexual since before I knew there was a word for it. My curiosity was normal for me but I found out that it didn't fit into "normal" society, so I keep my curiosties to myself. In time, and with the right people, I became "me". When I came out, I lost some friends but was quite surprised at how some of my other friends felt. I have been "me" for about 25 years now. In reading some of these threads, I have found that my road through bisexuality has been alot smoother than it has been for others. :paw: :paw:

Ansil III

Oct 23, 2005, 12:04 AM

Biboz49

Oct 23, 2005, 11:09 AM

I've always had an attraction to males since an early age, probably about age 10. This continued throughout my life. It wasn't until early 40's that I began to allow myself to enjoy thoughts of having sex with men. Up to age 40 I had become very comfortable with my sexuality and always thoroughly enjoyed sex with women and I still do. So entertaining thoughts of sex with men was then quite enjoyable, like expanding my horizons. With the support of a gf who was very turned on by watching 2 men together I finally got my chance at age 47. The first time was a 3some with gf and another guy. It was not that great as it was his first time too but it wasn't a disaster, just not great you know? Eventually I met others, became more comfortable with the sexual "dance" thats much different than with women and now I really enjoy having sex with men. Now I'm in a ltr with a woman that is so amazing. We are very open with each other and she knows all about my bisexuality side and is very supportive. She is also curious. So now I've got the best of both worlds sexually. Does it get any better than this? :wiggle2:

truncatus

Oct 23, 2005, 11:37 AM

Talk about a question bringing back memories!! A friend of mine came out of the closet one day while we were playing cards with a group of friends. There were about 6 of us in the room when he said it. We all heckled him for years. Afterwards I had a few dreams about guys and caught myself looking at men on occasion.
He asked me for a ride to work one day and I told him what I had been going through. He thought it was cool. I pushed the envelope, like I always do, and told him that if he wanted to feel my cock he could. I was driving and he was rubbing my cock through my jeans. I thought it felt incredible. When I went to pick him up from work that night, I let him give me a blowjob and I tried being on top. The head was nice, but the anal was really awkward. I dropped him off at his place and went to a gay bar and gave my first blowjob. Pretty busy night, huh?!
Since then, I have continued to push my limits. I have let a woman take a huge dildo to my ass. This thing was big enough to need an elbow in the middle. I thought it was a small arm when she put it in me! Recently I have let a man come in my mouth. I don't think it is bad at all! I guess I have swallowed about half a dozen guys by now.
I am married now, and have kept me secret to myself. This is the only place I let my secret become common-knowledge. I still fantasize about a mmf threesome where all of us can enjoy anything we want to.
:flag2: :2cents:

orib6ub9

Oct 24, 2005, 4:58 AM

To be perfectly honest, I didn't think that I was possibly bisexual (a term I had never heard of) until I was about 12-13 and found out that it wasn't socially acceptable to want sex with both genders. People didn't seem to understand being sexually attracted to both sexes. You were either "straight" or a "homo". All I knew was that, from adolescence I had always been craving the feel of something filling my ass.

I didn't have a clue what sex was, I wasn't molested or exposed to pornography, and there were no sexual traumas in my childhood. On my own, I used to put fingers first, and then later on, anything that I could find to stretch my butthole open.

My first sexual experience (which also turned out to be my first bisexual one) came when, as a 10 yo, I was chosen to be president of the clubhouse that the half-dozen or so neighbor kids and I had just built. (Before going any further, I just want to say that I am not now, nor have I ever been, a sexual predator. :disgust: ) When they decided that I should hold secret initiations in order to be let into the club, I took advantage of the situation to expand my sexual knowledge. I made each of the other kids expose themselves to me, all of them being boys except for the very last candidate - a girl one year older than me. I didn't manage to get her pants off, but I did get to see and play with her tits. But this was more of an opportunity than a true experience.

Although I was very attracted to girls, and even though I wasn't having any luck scoring with one yet, I still did not really think about possibly having a gay side until I had my first true mm experience; it was with my best friend's older brother. The three of us were all camping out in the backyard during the last weekend of summer break before entering high school.
My best friend decided to stay and cover for us while me and his older brother snuck off into the nearby Phoenix desert to set off some firecrackers and smoke cigarettes.

The desert heat left us quite comfortable in our levi's cutoffs and tank tops. After blowing up the firecrackers, we moved farther out into the desert to where Tom knew of an old mattress where we could sit comfortably while we smoked our cigs. Soon, a game of "Dare" (fuck the "truth &" part) that got out of hand had us racing from the mattress down a hillside to a tall cactus and then back again - in the nude. Even after giving me a several second head start, the older and faster Tom ran past me on the way back up the hill. (He may have won the race, but the view of his naked buns running up the hill in front of me and illuminated by the moon made for a great second place prize.

He commented on my taking a lick at his irresistable bunghole when he dared me to kiss his asshole 10 times. I tried to protest that I hadn't, but we both knew that I had. Soon, we had both tried sucking each other, fingering each other's asses, and although we tried, I wasn't able to get more than the head of his oversized cock in my ass, and that had me seeing stars. He held perfectly still for a timed 3 minutes while I tried to get used to the size of it. I really wanted to do this, but all of my self-stretching hadn't prepared me for how thick he was. With much regret, I had to give up and ended up fucking his ass with my smaller (honest to God) 7+ inches. I dumped my load inside his willing and tight butt and we went back to their house and snuck back into our sleeping bags.

The next morning, I awoke to his sucking softly on my cock. Terrified of being caught by his brother/my best friend, I made him stop and get back to his sleeping bag. Over an hour later when my best friend finally woke up, I was really kicking myself for not having let Tom continue with what he had started. We never got the chance to get together again since my family moved surprisingly out of the state a few weeks later to accept work that would allow us to finally buy a house of our own.

A couple years later when I finally was able to pop my cherry with a girl, I had a great time and didn't really think about having sex with guys again for the rest of high school although I did continue with, and to enjoy, my anal play privately. Growing up without a father, I didn't really have anyone to let me know when I was doing something feminine, and my loving and wonderful mother was too busy to notice anything. I only managed to have 3 more mf encounters before graduating HS.

In the two years that followed HS (and before HIV/AIDS was even discovered), I was a sexual junkie and had sex with almost 200 women - thank God for Disco, those tight-fitting Angle Flight(tm) polyester pants that snugged my butt tightly and presented my notable package for inspection, herbs, and a "no games - let's go do it :tongue: attitude". Amazingly, I never caught anything (or created anyone that I know of) in all these adventures.

A couple years later during college, I ran across another true bisexual guy. I had an MMF porn mag in my stack of porn and he found it while thumbing through the stack. He asked me if I was cool with this sort of thing and when I said I was, he said he was too and that we should get together sometime. In a way, this time that I ever began to think of myself as being a bisexual. A few days later when he had his cock, virtually a twin of my own, buried deep up inside my ass and I was reaching behind me and grabbing his buns to pull him in closer, I realized that I was definitely a bisexual.

He and I continued to have sex a few more times, usually with him sucking me off and then pounding my hungry ass until he dumped his load inside me (remember, this was in the pre-HIV/AIDS era). After graduation, we spent many encounters at his apt fully exploring each other's bodies. The sex was so great that for a time, I even wondered if I was just gay. However, I couldn't really imagine ever falling in love with another man and I would suck your dick and bury my tongue up your ass but please don't kiss me - it's a turn-off for me.

Nowadays, I am happily married (8 yrs) to a wonderful woman that I very much love. I want to share, and I look forward to spending, the rest of my life with her by my side. She knows that my heart belongs to her and that when I have sex with men, that she need never worry about my ever leaving her for someone else. Although she has and continues to use a strapon on me, it just isn't as good as the feeling of a warm cock that can enjoy my ass and feel real pleasure as I milk it, massage it, and m--- it with my willing butt.

If I were to ask anyone to take away something from all this it would be that in my day we had a phrase, "Don't fall in love at first fuck" which I interpreted back then to mean "Just because you love the sex, doesn't mean that you're in love with the person", but these days I interpret it to mean "Find out who you are before you decide who you aren't."

Peace

jim2be

Oct 29, 2008, 10:55 PM

I have alays known. From grade school,7th & 8th grade, on. I went to a boardringng school so we were always close. 2 older boys were quite active in initiating me. Later in HS and life I kept in touch with one of them. Many afternoons were spent feeling, touching, sucking & so on. These were not the passionate adult meetings of later life. I have been lucky to find a few long term bi relationships that have been satisfying as well as discrete. Now we have moved to a new home and once more I need to find a caring discrete partner. Wish me luck.

LosFrida

Oct 30, 2008, 12:22 AM

I remember the exact moment I realized it. I was 15 years old and attending my grandmother's wedding. She had just thrown the bouquet and it was caught by an absolutely stunning woman in her 30's. The woman joked and commented that "Even with this I probably still won't be able to get a date" The next 2 thoughts in my head were "I'd date you" followed by "Holy shit- I'm attracted to a woman."

mrtz1014

Oct 30, 2008, 1:17 AM

Hello - I'm knew to this site and am thrilled to have found it. Just curious to hear about when you realized you were bi and how. For example, I was certain I was straight until I kissed my best friend that was female. I'd love to hear your stories.

you know i don't get it when pple say all of a sudden one fine day i started liking the opposite sex.. to me ur sexuality is something ur born with and u began to fell it as soon as you start feeling sexual attraction towards other people. Now i believe it may be stronger at certain points of ur life or other but the feeling is always there. Saying u knew u were bi at a certain moment, makes it sound like anyone even if ur st8 can turn gay at any moment or circumstance. which i don't believe. Specifiying a moment when u turned gay or bi seems like denial of it before...

Celtiff2106

Oct 30, 2008, 3:37 AM

I have always known that I liked girls. Honestly, because of a very f-ed up childhood that I won't get into now, I had a hard time letting myself be attracted to men. But I remember "playing house" with boys and girls in preschool. And when I was in 2nd grade my best friend and I played "truth or dare" (that was far more dare than truth) where we ended up rubbing each other outside our clothes...
I have never had sex with a female, and only with one guy (my current boyfriend) and I am 23 now..I know I am kind of an anomaly...but I am who I am :)

Lienda

Oct 30, 2008, 9:39 AM

Up till recently, I havn't accepted having a Bisexual orientation. I used to believe all before then that people were only capable of having lustful fantasies (despite my own likes), and loving only one sex or ther other, and that how you felt was a choice. :| Denial by public influence I guess. I masturbated very early in life, but never had a huge, screaming sex drive. I never trusted my peers either, and spent most of my youth hateing or being afraid of others. Alot of children (mostly male) were mean back in Public school, and I grew up an out cast. Got messed up from it to.

The gender roles were supported only a little bit in my family. Both my parents were busy working most of the time, and wanted time for themselves, after a day of busting their butts. I pretty much just had my sister to play with. Whatever the gender the toys were made for, it didn't matter to us. We watched JI goe and transformers, for example. Loved to play with ponies and transoformer toys, and of course barbies occasionaly. (My sister is Heterosexual, I think.)

My parents did not display love to each other in front of us, period. As a child, I sometimes liked to stare at another person's private sector out of curiosity. I have had sexual dreams about both genders at night, and on occasion. The gender didn't matter there. It also didn't matter to me when I masturbated. Both were pretty much equaly lovely shapes to me. Never had any crushes though, so I don't know how that feels.

Never had intercoarse with a boy either. I let one girl friend use a toy on me, and kiss me, but that was about it. (My mother is Christian by the way. I believe in some of it, but am not deeply devoted.) Me and her were close, but all the isolation prior to our friendship made me stupid, and I did dumb, unsupportive things to her. I wasn't turned on by her in particular, but I felt a strong emotional connection. I have kissed two boys as well. One day, I just felt that meant Bisexual. Sexual attraction to both sexes. I don't get what physical experiance has to do with orientation really, unless it was enjoyable.

_Joe_

Oct 30, 2008, 8:03 PM

Hmm.

I was bicurious since.. high school I think it was. However, growing up in a redneck Texas town, with strict baptist parents, I never gave much into my desires to chase the boys. That - and I had the absolute worst gaydar (I still do at times, I can only spot the flaming ones)

Finally upon graduation, I went up to Lubbock from San Antonio. A dry county, deeper in the whole bible belt, however 8 hours away from home & parents dumped in the middle of 1000's of college students with opinions and flavors from around the country and was able to not really watch myeslf much. However, right away I fell for this woman and we started dating.

I confessed at that time I was bicurious, and she didn't mind. Hell we would watch some gay-movies together (Threesome, awesome movie), and Queer as Folk when it came out we loved. She never really gave much issue because it was biCURIOUS ,and I never was with a guy.

Got married, and had kids.

Opportunity presented itself unexpectanly, and we knew the guy was clean, so well, I sucked his cock, until completion, and swallowed, and absolutely loved it.

Thats the end to how and when.

What went downhill and plateued after that is a different story, but happy to say we're still together.

izzfan

Oct 30, 2008, 11:14 PM

Interesting question.... well, up until about the age of 17, I thought that I was straight, albeit a bit wierd (I realised that I was a crossdresser when I was about 13, this caused me no end of problems, self-loathing, confusion etc... ). People at school sometimes used to comment that I was gay and at the time I vigourously denied it. I was so confused about the crossdressing thing that I didn't want a (straight) relationship to complicate things further - of course, not having a girlfriend for several years can lead to "gay" comments when you are at school. Later on, I thought that it was probably better of them to think that I was gay than to know that I was a crossdresser. Nevertheless, I still said that I wasn't gay and didn't really feel any conscious attraction to men at the time.

However, by the time I turned 17 and had managed to (mostly) accept my crossdressing, though I was still pretty much in the closet. I found a lot of LGBT websites (I was still at home then, I'm at university at the moment, so I didn't really look at them often and was always careful to delete the history, cache etc... after I'd looked at them, I still do this out of habit even to this day), I managed to get hold of the first series of "Queer as Folk" (UK version) and just generally seemed to enjoy/be interested in the idea of same-sex activity, yet I still felt attracted to women. Of course, it probably existed in a latent form for many years before then. I guess, it all just helped me accept a part of myself that I hadn't really noticed/wanted to notice.

When I got to university, I joined the LGBT group and ended up sleeping with a few men, a couple of times weren't that good but other times were amazing!!! I seemed to feel a level of sensuality and intimacy that I didn't exactly expect and it was awesome. I think from that point on, I knew that I was definately not entirely straight.

jem_is_bi

Oct 31, 2008, 12:57 AM

I was probably bisexual when I emerged from the womb at birth.
I have always been sexually attracted to both men and women.
I have absolutely no memory of not being bisexual.

gallowravyn13

Oct 31, 2008, 7:30 AM

well, I didn't have an exact moment of "BINGO" it was more or less gradual. at first I was a little curious, and over the years it has gotten stronger. I once had a little oral fun with my best friend. and I really really liked it. I loved making her moan and squirm. it felt wonderful. she never did anything to me, and I dont know if that is any different than having a man do it. I have always thought of myself as straight, but the more beautiful women I see the more I want to experience their friendship and their touch. that connection, that seems like I have been missing.

paddington

Oct 31, 2008, 7:31 AM

this is all new to me. my mind is awash with questions. i've been married for over 20 years and i've ended a relationship with someone who was initially my best friend(she's getting divorced but she's known for years shes a lesbian she now tells me).i've only ever dated men before this,i can't remember ever having any crushes etc with female friends.
i might be bi,i think i am(admitting it to myself is hard)but i love my husband very much.he's been so kind and supportive.
i feel surprised by it,why didn't i know earlier?so many of you did.
things feel tough at the moment,i'm trying to repair my marriage-we're doing well,but i'm trying to work myself out too.it's been made harder by her telling everyone details about our relationship,i'm a private person.i think part of that is her punishing me because i won't leave my husband,she is very manipulative and controlling.
i suddenly realised today that i don't love her anymore,i felt relived!!!! i love my husband.my shoulders are lighter!
i don't know if i'm looking at women differently because of that relationship or because it's something that was already there????
sorry,it's so good to be open about it.

darkeyes

Oct 31, 2008, 8:16 AM

Paddington hun..ya can b bi an luff ya man.. b faithful 2 'im, care for 'im till the day ya die.. bein bisexual is no diff from bein het or gay cept that ya r attracted 2 both male an female.. every bisexual is diff from those who r attracted predominantly 2 women, to those who r mainly interetested in guys.. sum can luff 1 membas of 1 sex an not the otha.. many r only in it for the sex cos they like it.. not cos they wanna hav a deep an meaningful relationship with peeps.. ya kno..bit like het peeps who sleep around cept that they stik 2 the opposite gender..

Ya story aint that unusual.. as an individual ya r a unique person.. ya r who ya r.. yas human an ya sexuality..woteva it is is parta ya.. bisexual peeps r jus like ne 1 else.. in alla the wondrous an varied forms wich make up humanity.. they r also diff from every 1 else cosa that uniqueness wich makes us human...:)

Merlin

Oct 31, 2008, 9:45 PM

I never thought about it in terms of being bi or not. When I was 10 I started playing with the boys I hung with but we included sisters in our play time as well. By 12 yrs I was thinking of ways to get boys into situations where I would be able to either see them naked or play with them sexually. At 16 I taught my best friend how to masterbate and he was my first oral, swallowing included. I'm happily marred now and I'm still looking for male friends to play with. It has always felt so natural for me to feel and touch men as well as women I just new that I have always been Bi.