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theloner9109
Jun 15, 2005, 9:10 AM
Wow I hope this is a good idea...

Okay here is my story.
About 5 months ago I started having desires and and attraction to another guy at my school. At first I denied it, but I couldn't handle it anymore and I finally came to terms with it. I now realize that I'm attracted to other guys too, and I notice hot guys (oh trust me, I notice them alright... :bigrin: )

However I'm really strongly in love with this guy at my school, and I'm not sure what he is. I can't get him out of my head and I feel like nothing else would matter in the world if I had him. It hurts when I think about not being able to have him.

Question : Is that Love?

Anyway, like most people, I've been raised in a society where being gay or bi is not really accepted, so coming out would be pretty terrifying for me, so I'm not ready to admit that I'm bisexual, yet I'm pretty sure I am.

I do have a friend I can talk too, she's also bi and she's answered a lot of questions for me.

I don't really know what I expect in a reply to this post - I guess I'm looking for answers and support.

Can anyone help me?

TrimBeardHairyBod
Jun 15, 2005, 10:46 AM
Hi there, Loner

This is a difficult one, isn't it. So much a case of 'so near and yet so far.'

My advice would be to tread very, very carefully. In all probability, he doesn't have any bi-feelings and his rejection to your advances might therefore be brutal. That's the last thing you need.

Instead, why don't you do a full profile / contact ad on here. With a bit of luck, other bi-curious fellas in your area will get in touch and you can take it from there.

You asked if your feelings constitute love. I would say no. Love is all about *giving* whereas you are talking about what he can do for you.

Here's wishing you all the best as you explore your bi-side.

hypershot
Jun 15, 2005, 1:34 PM
I agree with Trim on this one. No offence meant but it sounds like a crush by all means. Have you done anything with a guy yet? Maybe when you do then this one guy wont have such a hold over you. Love is a complicated thing, unfortunately you never know when you're in love until you are, and then you cant even describe it, so Im sorry I cant answer your question properly.

Still if you need someone to chat to, im always available.

Hope to be talking to you soon!

Love Chris

xXx

theloner9109
Jun 16, 2005, 8:04 AM
Thanks I really appreciate it, I didn't expect anyone to answer lol!

Now that I look inside I kind of see that I knew it couldn't happen, I just didn't want to admit it to myself. And yeah I was really afraid of what would happen if he found out (he's kind of popular, and jock, and prep, so yeah you can probably guess).

I really do appreciate you guys answering, thanks for your advice!

Chris CT
Jun 16, 2005, 8:54 AM
Can I offer another perspective?

This certainly won't be your last unfulfilled love affair. This will probably happen many other times and for lots of reasons, you won't be able to become intimate with the person. This isn't just true of bi or gay people, it happens to everyone. We meet someone who fascinates us and who we think we can't live without - but it simply won't work. Eventually - and I know how painful this is right now - the attraction wears off and you move on to new emotional attachments.

It's all part of becoming an emotionally mature adult.

In a few years, you'll think back and realize that you exercised good judgement by keeping your feelings to yourself this time.

Chris