"You know you're bi if...."

[JohnnyV]

Hi all,

I've seen so many of those chain emails that say "you know you're ----- if". They can tell you how you know if you're a redneck, Puerto Rican, Souther, gay, a lesbian, Catholic, etc.... But they're usually a fun way for people with a certain identity to confirm what they have in common.

If we were to start a chain email that said "you're know you're bi if --" what would come after the "if"? Any ideas?

The only ones I could think of were:

--if you've gone to the Renaissance Fair
--if you've seen Rocky Horror Picture Show more than five times
--if you watch "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy" and afterwards, start asking yourself for advice about how to dress
--if you watch "Sex and the City" and you want to learn from Samantha but you want to bang Charlotte

Anyone else have any ideas??? This is actually part of my informal research.

J

PS. Some people who know me have asked why I haven't yet taken my supposed hiatus from bisexual.com. I promise, I promise, I will disappear so I can get my stuff done. I just need to break away slowly so I don't go through bisexual withdrawal. Hugs.

[Haemoglobin]

haha . . i didnt think anyone else is watchin queer eye for the straight guy AND sex and the city apart from me here :bibounce: nah , joking . . but i will think about some examples for you know youre bi when . . . . but right now im blank , my minds coming up with nothing . . .

:rolleyes:

[Rhuth]

Oh god... how bi does it make me that I helped get the San Francisco Renaissance Faire up and running? Lol I think they are still using my kinky suggestive voice on their phone system. So I try to escape the Renaissance circut, get addicted to Bisexual.com, and find that here! Am I really that predictable? *sigh*


You know you are bi when you see a cute couple kissing, and can't figure out who to be jealous of.

/Rhuth

[Haemoglobin]

i stopped reading after kinky suggestive voice actually :tong:
your example is a real life example in fact . . :rolleyes: im still thinking . .

[MikeW]

--if you've seen Rocky Horror Picture Show more than five times
--

LMAO... Well I guess this confirms it. I've seen Rocky Horror at least a couple hundred times.

[JohnnyV]

Okay, I thought of one more.

You know you're bi if----

---you know about this Canadian webmaster named Drew.

[jedinudist]

You know you're bi if...

A hot looking woman and a hot looking guy both walk in the room and after a moment of trying to decide, you gleefully decide.... BOTH

[strawberry8302]

You know you are bi when you see a cute couple kissing, and can't figure out who to be jealous of.

/Rhuth


LMAO Rhuth, what a good one! Hmm, I guess I can steal a little of your joke and say,

You know you're bi when you see a couple, and you want to bang both of them. :bigrin:

[smokey]

You definately know you're bi when you are daydreaming about one sex while checking out the other.

[Itsjustme14]

How 'bout you know you're bi if....

You're fantasizing about Colin Farrel while you're banging your girlfriend?


P.S. You're taking a sabbatical JV???? What about us going through JV wothdrawl????

[KevsBi]

When your porn collection contains both straight and gay movies :bigrin:

[ddbmma]

--- when asked for a prefence of ice cream flavors, you stare blankly at those offering a choice.

--- you consider becoming asexual routinely because you have difficulty in figuring out which gender is more fun sexually.

--- you wind up having bouts of manic laughter and crying in unision, without being manic depressive due to bi-polar disorders, or any other psychological misgivings.

--- you know why you set in laughing tears is becuase you care about your man and woman so much you won't bear either hurt, so you must wrack your mind to be diplomatic and balanced continually.

--- you will not fuction when given ultimatums, your brain shorts out. (see ice cream choices)

--- you get passed this list and add more to it, from personal experience.

--- everyone else you socialize with refuses to tell you to straighten up, because they are as twisted as you.

--- toliet seats cause horrible delimas which can last hours.

--- you've no problem asking men or women to pick up your dropped pen, roll of tape, stapler, etc. etc.

--- everyone calls you cheeky, and you reply, who's cheek?

--- realization sets in it does not matter who's cheek.

[JohnnyV]

--- when asked for a prefence of ice cream flavors, you stare blankly at those offering a choice.

--- you consider becoming asexual routinely because you have difficulty in figuring out which gender is more fun sexually.

--- you wind up having bouts of manic laughter and crying in unision, without being manic depressive due to bi-polar disorders, or any other psychological misgivings.

--- you know why you set in laughing tears is becuase you care about your man and woman so much you won't bear either hurt, so you must wrack your mind to be diplomatic and balanced continually.

--- you will not fuction when given ultimatums, your brain shorts out. (see ice cream choices)

--- you get passed this list and add more to it, from personal experience.

--- everyone else you socialize with refuses to tell you to straighten up, because they are as twisted as you.

--- toliet seats cause horrible delimas which can last hours.

--- you've no problem asking men or women to pick up your dropped pen, roll of tape, stapler, etc. etc.

--- everyone calls you cheeky, and you reply, who's cheek?

--- realization sets in it does not matter who's cheek.


DDBMMA -- You got me thinking and now I thought of a few more. Tell me if they're totally dorky:

YOU KNOW YOU'RE BI IF ---

--Shirtless, you look sexier than shirtless men at a demolition derby, but not as sexy as the shirtless men at the White Party.

--You know how to use a dental dam, a butt plug, a cock ring, a feeldoe, and a diaper genie.

--You have an opinion as to whether men or women give better head, based on experience.

--You can't tell whether "Mr. and Mrs. Smith" turns you on because you identify with Brad wanting Angelina wanting Brad, or because you identify with Angelina wanting Brad wanting Angelina.

--You can sing any sad love song without having to change the personal pronoun from "him" to "her" or vice versa.

--You'd come out of the closet, but you'd only be going into another closet.

--You're the only guy in the gay bar who likes pussy.

--You're the only girl in the dyke bar who likes cock.

--Your friends worship Elizabeth Taylor because she's a diva, whereas you'd love to fuck her the way she looked in Butterfield 8.

J

[Lyon1369]

well hell Im screwed. I worked the Ren fair here for 4 years.
I also played RiffRaff and Edie in the local cast of Rocky for 5 years. HOW BI CAN I GET?
LOL
Lyon

[membrain]

LOL! Well I don't know about the other ones, but the Rocky Horror Picture Show scared the shit out of me. :eek: Not because of the fish-nets or anything, but those songs...The Horror!

[redheadedwench]

...you're dreaming of angelina jolie or selma hayek(sp?) while having sex w/your husband.

...you have penis envy-and there are other desires, other than-you wanting to pee standing up.

redheadedwench


:smilies15

[mrplayfuluk]

when you get home after a hot date with a cute lady and start checking your favourite gay porn dvd, 'cause you're still feeling horny!

[Nara_lovely]

If...

-you can check out the hotties and comment on them to either male or female friends.

-your friends call you for advice over partners (male or female) because you kinda understand how both tick.

[Daviecurious]

You Know you're bi if.......
your feeldoe is labeled His and Hers

[glantern954]

Your CD collection includes Madonna, Erasure, Bananarama, Scissor Sisters and Guns n' Roses, Van Halen, Motley Crue, Pearl Jam.

[arana]

Your CD collection includes Madonna, Erasure, Bananarama, Scissor Sisters and Guns n' Roses, Van Halen, Motley Crue, Pearl Jam.
Uh Oh! :eek:

[LouiseBrookslover]

"if you watch "Sex and the City" and you want to learn from Samantha but you want to bang Charlotte"


Personally, I don't have any interest in Samantha at all. But sometimes I both want to bang Charlotte and BE Charlotte at the same time. When I'm with my man, I really tap into my feminine energy and do so by visualizing myself as what my masculine side greatly desires. Obviously, I don't fuck much in front of a mirror!

I think that makes me a little bit bi, no?

[chook]

If you keep on staring at the blokes arse next to you.


Cheers Chook :bigrin:

[meteast chick]

Well this proves it, or at least proves I'm bi-curious...

I'm dying to go to a Renaissance faire and I know every word of
<sings> "Let's do the time warp agaaaaaaain!"

luv and kisses,
xoxoxoxo
meteast

[JohnnyV]

You know you're bi if people tell you you're going through a phase, and you say, "totally."



It's just a jump to the left.....

[citystyleguy]

what the hell! here goes;

you know your bi, when;

you like wearing your boyfriend's 501's for the same reason you like to wear your girlfriend's 501's----

you pick your movies for the night out based on the female star as much as the male star----

during the Olympics, you pick out the scheduled events for womens diving as you pick out the mens diving scheduled events---- (the same would hold for gymnastics, but the womens division are getting younger and younger; too much of a lolita complex!)

your favorite scene(s) in mr and mrs smith are when aj and bp are sitting in the chairs, facing the camera, and you can enjoy both at the same time!!!!---

making decisions are a big headache (your mind is telling you why both would be good!)----

your watching "one fine day", and michelle pfeiffer and george clooney both look hot!----

its been a long day and my head hurts! hope this helps!

[twodelta]

[QUOTE=Nara_lovely]If...

-you can check out the hotties and comment on them to either male or female friends.

I was going to say this one - Cat and myself often catch each other checking out the same guy or gal. So, here's my contribution:

You are most likely Bi if You have used ticket stubs for both "Cats" and a NASCAR event. Just imagine, Dale Jr with whiskers and a tail - GRRRRR :eek:

Dave :bigrin:

[Just_Gem]

--if you've seen Rocky Horror Picture Show more than five times


Guess this puts us in the BI circle :tongue: We still watch it when we can find it - anyone know if it's on DVD or where we can find a copy? (VHS would work too) :cutelaugh

Hell, used to see it 5 times in one weekend when it was playing all nite at the theaters - every weekend too :wiggle2: and had a Magenta outfit, complete with a wig, to wear to the theater so I could take my turn up front to act it out while it was playing. :bigrin:

Gemm

[JohnnyV]

Hell, used to see it 5 times in one weekend when it was playing all nite at the theaters - every weekend too :wiggle2: and had a Magenta outfit, complete with a wig, to wear to the theater so I could take my turn up front to act it out while it was playing. :bigrin:

Gemm

LOL !!! My claim to fame was they made me do Rocky because I was the only Rocky Horror dork who wasn't scrawny. I had to take my shirt off and run around in a blond wig. Too bad I never got to do the threesome with Janet (slut!!!) and Brad (asshole!!!!)

J

[Amishmafia]

You watch E.TV's 100 Hottest Celebrity Bodies, and your mouth waters regardless of whether its Justin Timberlake or Shakira who's on the screen.

[codybear3]

LOL! Well I don't know about the other ones, but the Rocky Horror Picture Show scared the shit out of me. :eek: Not because of the fish-nets or anything, but those songs...The Horror!

Watch it membrain or I'll start singing "The Time Warp" over and over again just for you... :bigrin: By the way, my favorite character was Riff Raff... :cool:

And also, you know your bi if: You walk through Sears looking at Craftman tools and notice how nice the comforters in the linen dept. would look on your bed... :paw: :paw:

[NightHawk]

You know you are bisexual if:

whether you would enjoy loving and having sex with a friend is more dependent upon their character than their gender.

[Lorcan]

You know you're bi if

you get whiplash from looking at girls, then boys, then back to girls again! :bigrin:

[x_Love_me_4_me_x]

You know you're bi if you look at your best friend in a different way.
I know that was really lame but thats all I can think of because before me and my gf became gf and gf we were best friends then I confronted her about my feelings and found out she liked me back.

[JohnnyV]

Just thought of a new one at the gym today:

You know you're bi if --

--you go to the gym, and you find yourself loitering by the windows of the step class, and also loitering in the locker room, taking as long as possible to finish your "shower."

J

[HwdBiGuy]

Im my experience:

When I see a nice looking couple and cannot decide who has the better ass.

When after great sex with my wife I find myself whacking off to gay porn because she is asleep and I'm still horny.

When I'm at a gay bar with my wife and we are both checking out the totally hot gay guys and lesbians and we turn to each other and say at the same time 'What a waste'.

[Itsjustme14]

...if your wife wakes you up at night complaining that your boyfriend is hogging all the covers!

[DiamondDog]

When I'm at a gay bar with my wife and we are both checking out the totally hot gay guys and lesbians and we turn to each other and say at the same time 'What a waste'.

What's wrong with being lesbian or gay?

I have not ever had sex with a lesbian but I have had sex with a fair ammount of gay men before and it's rather nice.

Also I have found that my lesbian, gay, trans, and queer people to be very supportive of me, and even if they're not I just wouldn't have anything to do with them anyway.

[JohnnyV]

What's wrong with being lesbian or gay?

I have not ever had sex with a lesbian but I have had sex with a fair ammount of gay men before and it's rather nice.

Also I have found that my lesbian, gay, trans, and queer people to be very supportive of me, and even if they're not I just wouldn't have anything to do with them anyway.

Diamond Dog,

I hope I'm not putting words in HwdBiGuy's mouth, but I think he meant something much more positive than what you heard in his statement. He meant "what a waste" in the sense that he would love to sleep with the women in the bar, and his wife would love to sleep with the men in the bar, but the women are off limits to him and the men are off limits to her. "What a waste" is an indirect way of saying how hot everyone else is. Not a put-down the way I heard; if anything, a little bit of healthy self-mockery for the fact that we, as bis, can feel left out of many different sexual situations.

J

[DiamondDog]

Diamond Dog,

I hope I'm not putting words in HwdBiGuy's mouth, but I think he meant something much more positive than what you heard in his statement. He meant "what a waste" in the sense that he would love to sleep with the women in the bar, and his wife would love to sleep with the men in the bar, but the women are off limits to him and the men are off limits to her. "What a waste" is an indirect way of saying how hot everyone else is. Not a put-down the way I heard; if anything, a little bit of healthy self-mockery for the fact that we, as bis, can feel left out of many different sexual situations.

J
ok. I took it as a comment as in neither the lesbians or the gay men would want to do anything sexual together with a m/f bi couple.

[HwdBiGuy]

JohnnyV summed it up pretty well.

The three examples were all true experiences that I thought were amusing.

Whatever anyones sexual orientation is I support it and I hope everyone can be comfortable with it.

[TaylorMade]

You know you're bi when you watch Football for the game and the Cheerleaders...


Oooh, I just got my cherry popped. That felt pretty good.

*TM*

[Rhuth]

Oooh, I just got my cherry popped. That felt pretty good.

LOL Great thread to pop your cheery on! Welcome! *sits back to enjoy the show of TaylorMade getting tackled by all the Floridians within 15 min*

[TaylorMade]

LOL Great thread to pop your cheery on! Welcome! *sits back to enjoy the show of TaylorMade getting tackled by all the Floridians within 15 min*

I haven't seen anyone yet... let me prepare myself, though.*puts on pads and helmet*

*TM*