how do you deal with a broken heart in a poly relationship ?

[Long Duck Dong]

lol ok..... I had a phone call the other night from a concerned parent ( straight female ) who had a cross dressing husband, a lesbian daughter, gay son and her youngest daughter came out as a bisexual......

concerned parent was worried on how they should handle having a bisexual child and what do they do when the daughter brings home a bf and a gf for dinner.... my reaction was " set another place at the table " lol......

concerned parent is LGBT friendly and supportive and going to make another go of the marriage with their husband ( they are separated and I have offered to help them reconcile the marriage ).....

I asked concerned parent why it is that they were fine with gay and lesbian children... but struggle with a bisexual children..... and their answer is they are not sure how to relate to them as bisexual.... as bisexuals are attracted to both sexes, the parent, and the other 2 children are attracted to a single sex......, they did not see anything wrong with being bisexual, but it was hard to imagine being pulled in two directions at once ( loving two people of different genders ) and how much harder it can be on a person to be in a relationship with 2 others, and how hard it must be to maintain a relationship with one person if they break up with the other partner......


so I thought that I would ask in the forums..... how do people in poly relationships, deal with the issue of being in a poly relationship, and having one partner leave, and you are trying to maintain the relationship with the other person, while dealing with a broken heart.....???

[reddc513]

I have not completely managed a Triad relationship. I am bi sexual though and interested. We had one failed attempt (on the extra females part) but we have a possible for a second attempt.
A friend of mine and his girlfriend decided to try to be in polygamous relationship. they are a case it didnt work out.
My thought on the matter is to tell the parent not to worry. Tell them that it may end up being easier than she thinks because having that other person in her childs relationship will help in the consoling prosses for the fact that they are the same age and have been a part of the relationship first hand. Tell her to have her ears and shoulder open because it is nothing dif than a normal break up between just two people.
Wishing her the best of luck. At least she is open minded. My mother and father are not and i have had a few aunts and uncles disown me for my life choices. They believe i am going to hell and i am not sure what to think on that matter or how to deal with that. and then the other side of my family i live a lie in the fact that they have no clue.:bipride:

[*pan*]

about 2 years ago we were in a triad for 5 years and it ended, leaving me with a broken heart. me and my wife were married for over 25 years at the time, things werent going so good with us and she wouldnt even talk to me and wanted a divorce, after 6 months of not talking, having sex or anything, a woman contacted me on messenger, we hit it off, after about a month we met and it was like we were made for each other, same interest sexually compatible, we were like sexual athletes in bed. the wife one day seeing us together came to me crying and wanting me back after i had told the other woman everything that went on with me and my wife and that she wanted a divorce. i had made commitments to this woman. but still loving my wife took her back with the understanding i would not hurt the other woman or let her go. so we became a triad. eventually after a very rocky road she became close with my wife, they became best friends. she wanted to marry us after 2 years and we did have a cermoney during the summer soltice with all three of us marrying each other. my wife accepted her into our marriage and the woman not only married me but my wife too so we became all 3 married.
the other woman my second wife was a nymph and coulde'nt get enough even though we were at it 4 to 5 times a day in long sessions. she was always wanting a stranger to have sex with. meeting guys on the side ect... we had 4 some's, 5 some's always with bi guys so i would be involved too, but she still was'nt satisfied and wanted straight guys to be able to come over only for her, even taking people she met at her work to the park after work, this eventually caused problems between us with her trying to lie about some of her encounters, but in the end she left moved into another guys home with him. where she does as she pleases without him asking her about anything. she left me with the impression that if i would leave my wife, me and her would still be together but i could not with good concience leave my other wife, she has always stood by me, never lied to me, never cheated, accepted my bisexuality, and been with me through thick and thin for over 32 years now. i never wanted to hurt anyone. to me marriage is forever and have only been married to these two woman and one other who wanted the divorce. i have loved many woman in my life but only fell in love with 3. and when i fall in love it is forever, that's just me i guess.
i was in love and believed what she said to me, i believed all her oaths and promisses, i believed how much she said she loved me. I couldent understand how someone could leave someone like she did with all of what she said and believed. i was heart broken. and it almost killed me. but i still had my other wife who stood by me all these years and am thankful for her. and wanted me even though there was another woman in my life. this is the only thing that got me through this.
trying to cram this into a short reply is hard, i could write a book on it and my experiences about it. but the bottom line is i had my other wife to help get me thought it so there is a positive to being in a triad that a lot of people will never experience, this triad was not planned, it just happened, because i refused to choose between the woman. and this is my story of a broken heart within a triad.

[LastGent]

For *pan*: FIVE TIMES A DAY?! We need to talk.

For Long Duck Dong: Poly relationships are extremely nuanced, and with impulsive teenagers this can be a problem. The girl's parents need to help her understand how serious such relationships can be. Unlike *pan*, I would plan everything. The girl needs to be told that in some cases her partners will not want to know each other, or they might not want group sex. So what I hope the family will do is write a document like a constitution that explains what each partner wants, how to decide to add a new one or let go of one and what to do if a partner changes his or her mind about not wanting to know the other half of the arm candy.