New to all this, bi-curious

[jack7171]

Hello there,
just registered online here, which is a big thing for me, never taken any step in this direction before. I have always identified as a straight bloke, but I have some sexual urges towards men. No romantic feelings or anything like that, but some fantasies, etc. I doubt I'm unique there! But I have never had even the inkling of a gay experience - a few times in my life (on nights out) guys have come on to me, but it never even occurred to me at the time to accept. If this makes any sense, I find the idea of being with a guy sexually quite exciting, but when I walk down the street I'm only looking at the women - I don't find guys attractive in the same way, I've never looked at a guy and thought 'wow, he's hot' whereas I think that about a woman several times daily! I feel quite conflicted about this - I don't want to shy away from a new experience, which I feel I want quite a lot, but I'm sure my default setting is straight and I don't really know how I'd actually react once push came to shove in the bedroom.

Anyway, just wanted to get that off my chest. I'm sure it's quite mundane given where this is appearing. But you know, everyone is a unique snowflake in their own mind right? I'll probably set up a personal ad here in a day or two, but it's all just a big step.

[Realist]

Welcome, Jack.

You've come to the right place to find answers. There's some brilliant folks here, so I'm sure someone will help you sort yourself out.

In the end, you will have to do what's in your heart and make your own decisions. But, sometimes just listening to others will help you along your way.

Good luck with that!

[DuckiesDarling]

Welcome to the site, as Realist said there are a lot of good people here from all sexualities and a whole host of threads and articles that might help.

[slipnslide]

Hello there,
just registered online here, which is a big thing for me, never taken any step in this direction before. I have always identified as a straight bloke, but I have some sexual urges towards men.

Don't worry, the urges will pass and you'll feel normal again.

[bipartite]

I'm New to this also Jack. I've been having brief chat online with a guy and have cold feet. When I finally come out to my wife she was supportive yet when this become to real she has concerns about it. Now I'm not sure. You may know how this goes, she says OK with it, and when it happens she becomes distant and doubting her feminine quality (Im not enough for you). I don't want this to hurt her. Oh how I love the ladies though. Its a crazy feeling to have. Im a straight lady loving man, yet wants to bottom for a man I may or may not know. So don't let this mess with your mind. Your not alone man........

[curious4dudes13]

hi jack. i too can relate to you. I have little sexual attraction to a man other than the act of having sex with him. Feel free to message me if you'd like to chat some more.

[bityme]

No need to worry! You are all NORMAL!!

The attraction one has for either gender can run the gambit. Between curiosity & fantasy and exclusivity & commitment is a vary wide range of feelings.

The desire for physical involvement does not require falling in love. That is fully evident with heterosexuals. Having more than one girlfriend or using a prostitute are situations which generally exhibit the absence of love or commitment and highlight physical interaction for sexual gratification.

The same is true of relationships between those of the same gender. Having a fantasy or curiosity does not mean you have to take physical action. You have a choice and there is great variation in the manner which people exercise their choice.

Relax, take your time, consider the consequences and then make a decision on what to do.

Enjoy!

Pappy

[Seanrtn]

Welcome Jack! There are a lot of good people here, you have come to the right place.

[Dj019]

totally agree with you. there are many like this. its just what we like and want to experience and have fun.

[bynpm]

This will be interesting to follow. I too am married and very curious. I have been to a bath-house twice, on the second occassion a guy jerked me off just for a few minutes before I shot a huge load. Looking for more. Good luck, I can understand your feelings.

[12voltman59]

I will add my welcome to ya.

As others have said--this is a good place to come to in order to explore those feelings---you may find you wish to act on them or not-----that is Ok--its Ok and normal to have them---there are plenty of people who have or had the same feelings, desires, etc you express that are here.

Do spend some time browsing through the Forum board-there are thousands of posts on topics relating to this along with other things--we are not exclusively about sex and related matters here.

We do have our malcontents and such---but they are the exception rather than the norm, just don't pay attention to them if they are a real ahole to ya!!

Once again, welcome and I hope you find the answers to your many questions.

[dafydd]

yeah! another london bloke! pint?
d