Women enjoying anal

[ErosUrge]

I just had a lengthy discussion with a female friend about all the various things we enjoy sexually. Perhaps because we're going to enjoy each other sexually tonight. With that said we discussed for a good half hour why men and women enjoy or don't enjoy anal and the reasons for it. She told me how her first experience with it was horrible (as was mine) and that she didn't think she'd ever try it again. But eventually the right guy came along who knew just how to be patient and allow her to adjust. As a result, she had an amazing time receiving anal. She said that though she didn't orgasm from it, it stimulated her so much that she used her hand on her pussy and from that the orgasm took over. She said the combination of anal and masturbation brought her off to a tremendous orgasm.

So my question here is mostly for women to reply to. We all understand the reason why men enjoy anal so much, but since women don't have a prostate, what is it for those of you who indulge in anal that you enjoy about it so much? And if you do enjoy it and have an orgasm, what is it while you're having anal that triggers the orgasm? I would like to know how this works for women and hearing the different experiences and perspectives I think would be of great interest to many. Thanks for your patience and desire to discuss this openly.

[innaminka]

From personal experience only .....

When married, my husband and I had regular anal sex. I enjoyed it thoroughly (or else I wouldn't have done it!)
It was emotionally bonding as trust is essential.
It felt great - yes, it does of hurt in a filling way but I found it sort of generated my endorphins which certaily gave me a tiny high. (a sharp pain however, means "NO! STOP!")
orgasms were incredible (done manually of course)
There was that hint of naughtiness which appealed to me.

I never had any "fecal" issues except for a little bit of odour after removal (yes I did atm a very few times :rolleyes:)

Over the years, I "invited" 3 other gentlemen to savour my goodies back there and it was equally enjoyable.

Quite frankly I liked it.

Now that I'm soley with Christine, we dabble but it doesn't have the same level of pleasure because firstly, plastic just isn't the same, and for whoever's wearing the harness they actually feel nothing except resistance, which also isn't the same.

[DuckiesDarling]

I enjoy anal, but only if it's done right. Luckily, my first experience with it was great, with husband...not that great but not painful at least, but with my current partner and fiance, it's awesome.

But there are some women that won't even attempt it, there are some guys that won't even think about doing anything there on a female. So it's not a gender issue, it's a perspective issue. Some people can't understand that a place that is there to eliminate waste might have a way to also be pleasurable.

I have orgasmed strictly because of anal, but that was more due to the fact I was enjoying every moment with my partner.

[Emunahd]

I finally experienced "anal done right" within this last year. I actually came with no other stimulation and it blew my mind! Anatomically speaking, I think it must have somehow stimulated the g spot, because my clitoral orgasms feel different from the vaginal, internal ones, and this was more like that. My partner is not big, he's average, which for me (my internal plumbing is small) seems to be just the right size.

Plenty of lube,trust and the right position and it's all good!!

[LouiseBrooks]

I have some assigned reading for you...

Toni Bentley's The Surrender...THE book on one woman's love for anal sex.

[ErosUrge]

Thanks so far to everyone's input. I am always looking to understand all I can about the enjoyment of the sensual from both sexes but particularly from women since being a man, I obviously have an understanding what makes men tick.....
So hopefully I will see more responses to this topic since I have always had a curiosity as to how women derive pleasure from anal....Of course I understand the importance of the approach, process, and partner. I think my main curiosity has been how those sensations anally stimulate and trigger all the rest for a woman to experience pleasure and orgasm. Again and as we all know, it's easy to understand with men since the prostate is the key to ultimate pleasure for men receiving anal. I have talked to one woman about it who told me that when she receives anal and it's done properly, the sensations gradually build and eventually spread outward to her vagina and beyond. As it continues and if all is going well, it culminates into a tremendous orgasm. Usually it happens by stimulating the clit but in some instances, not at all.
So, if anyone else has more to add or another perspective, please post and thanks for taking the time to do so.

[Briar Rose]

I was reading somewhere (and now of course I can't remember where) that the other side of a woman's G-spot is also functional. The spot is on the membrane wall that separates the vaginal tunnel from the rectal one. So there is, according to whoever I was reading this from, a female anal g-spot.

It could well be true as much of the genital structures seem to be parallel between the genders.

[ohmymy69]

My husband and I enjoy CLEAN anal play both ways, we use toys with him. (he's still a cock virgin anally). He introduced me to it slowly so I've never had a "bad experience" ever. The opposite really, my orgasms anally are the most incredibly intense I've ever had!!! We don't play anally often (about once every two weeks) preferring to keep it a "special" form of play.

I need to explain I never had a single orgasm in 33 years of marriage to my ex husband, I thought I was one of the ladies that was destined to never quite get there...he even blamed me for lousy sex! With my husband I have found that I'm extremely multi-orgasmic having VERY intense orgasms one right after the other. We have to pace our play so I don't run out of energy!

While explaining anal play to me he explained how there are more nerve endings in the anal area than around the vagina and how they are differing sensations too. With his finger he showed me how he could rub my G-spot gently through the membrane and while that caused an orgasm it wasn't nearly as intense as simple penetration is!!! He doesn't cum from penetration alone like I do, it normally requires manual stimulation along with a toy for him to get off.

I can't explain the mechanism for my anal orgasms but it's not stimulation of the G-spot and no other manipulation is required either...it might just be the erotic nature of the play that takes me over the top so easily!!!

[hgf33]

It's not the worst thing in the world, but I'm not a fan. The only pleasure I get from it is knowing my man loves it. Other than that, he is quite thick, and I don't enjoy the pain or the after-effects, which I feel for a few days. I do, however, thoroughly enjoy a backdoor finger during doggie style! :-) I honestly don't know how people do it! We do it right... Patience, lube, sometimes a numbing agent... But I just can't get into it. I end up pretty miserable during the act, and I feel bad, but now I just don't really do it at all.

[ErosUrge]

I was reading somewhere (and now of course I can't remember where) that the other side of a woman's G-spot is also functional. The spot is on the membrane wall that separates the vaginal tunnel from the rectal one. So there is, according to whoever I was reading this from, a female anal g-spot.

It could well be true as much of the genital structures seem to be parallel between the genders.

This actually makes a lot of sense about the genital structures being parallel between the genders. I never thought about that but the prostate and the g-spot in women are essentially in the same location. Which further supports the fact that at a certain point during gestation, we are both sexes....or am I going out on a limb with this thought? Either way, it makes sense to me. Thanks.

[ErosUrge]

My husband and I enjoy CLEAN anal play both ways, we use toys with him. (he's still a cock virgin anally). He introduced me to it slowly so I've never had a "bad experience" ever. The opposite really, my orgasms anally are the most incredibly intense I've ever had!!! We don't play anally often (about once every two weeks) preferring to keep it a "special" form of play.

I need to explain I never had a single orgasm in 33 years of marriage to my ex husband, I thought I was one of the ladies that was destined to never quite get there...he even blamed me for lousy sex! With my husband I have found that I'm extremely multi-orgasmic having VERY intense orgasms one right after the other. We have to pace our play so I don't run out of energy!

While explaining anal play to me he explained how there are more nerve endings in the anal area than around the vagina and how they are differing sensations too. With his finger he showed me how he could rub my G-spot gently through the membrane and while that caused an orgasm it wasn't nearly as intense as simple penetration is!!! He doesn't cum from penetration alone like I do, it normally requires manual stimulation along with a toy for him to get off.

I can't explain the mechanism for my anal orgasms but it's not stimulation of the G-spot and no other manipulation is required either...it might just be the erotic nature of the play that takes me over the top so easily!!!

Thanks for sharing this information. Your husband is exactly right about there being more nerve endings in the anal area and that applies to both sexes.

I remember when I finally decided to try again with anal how I read about this and it encouraged me to have more confidence to find the pleasure factor through anal. And like you both, I too don't indulge in anal that often. But when I do, it's a delicious and wonderful experience aside from all the other pleasures I enjoy sexually. And I concur that it might very well be the nature of the play that is so enticing and sends one over the top.

Being male, I must feel stimulation and good sensations to fully enjoy these moments. And quite honestly, I must have an erection for this to happen. Without an erection, I lose interest in this kind of play. That hasn't been the case since I learned how to relax and respond to transcend the discomfort when it happens which is rare these days. And as long as there is patience with myself or if another is with me, pleasure eventually takes hold.

Toys work very well to substitute for a cock. I haven't had the cock experience in a very long time. Not because of no availability, but for me it must be with the right man. The last time it happened, it was exquisite. It literally took my breath away and I had the most amazing and delicious orgasm. One would think that after such a great experience, a person would want to have it constantly. But I feel that it's the quality of the experience that makes it worthwhile and so look at it as an occasional delight. There are so many wonderful experiences sensually to limit things to just this one and not experiencing it constantly I believe makes it all the more enjoyable.

Sorry to go on from the male perspective, but from reading these posts from women, I have learned that the anal experience has a universal quality for both sexes. This is enlightening.

[ErosUrge]

It's not the worst thing in the world, but I'm not a fan. The only pleasure I get from it is knowing my man loves it. Other than that, he is quite thick, and I don't enjoy the pain or the after-effects, which I feel for a few days. I do, however, thoroughly enjoy a backdoor finger during doggie style! :-) I honestly don't know how people do it! We do it right... Patience, lube, sometimes a numbing agent... But I just can't get into it. I end up pretty miserable during the act, and I feel bad, but now I just don't really do it at all.

I understand very well how this happens. Like you, I have never been able to accomodate a very thick cock. I'm amazed at the people who can and have wished that I could also. But it's never worked for me and like you have felt the negative after-effects. That's been years ago and it was one of the reasons why I refused to indulge at that time. Even a finger for me gave great discomfort. However since then, I've learned what my limits are and as long as the man or the toy is not too thick, then it is an amazing experience. This did take time to adjust and experiment with. But once I learned and understood what my limitations were, then I was able to enjoy it to its fullest. I'm not trying to convince you to take the same route. I understand as I too did not indulge at all for 16 years before finally trying again. Luckily for me things worked out when I decided to try it all again.

[hgf33]

I understand very well how this happens. Like you, I have never been able to accomodate a very thick cock. I'm amazed at the people who can and have wished that I could also. But it's never worked for me and like you have felt the negative after-effects. That's been years ago and it was one of the reasons why I refused to indulge at that time. Even a finger for me gave great discomfort. However since then, I've learned what my limits are and as long as the man or the toy is not too thick, then it is an amazing experience. This did take time to adjust and experiment with. But once I learned and understood what my limitations were, then I was able to enjoy it to its fullest. I'm not trying to convince you to take the same route. I understand as I too did not indulge at all for 16 years before finally trying again. Luckily for me things worked out when I decided to try it all again.

Well, we've been together for a long time and he's not going anywhere. I've tried it numerous times, but what I don't get is this. He has my tight pussy, we BOTH enjoy that. I'm not worried about getting used to it so I can enjoy it. I could care less about anal for myself, it's not important to me, FOR me. No one wants hemorrhoids, anyway. I only do it for him. Don't get me wrong, I love pleasing my man, but I just don't know if it's worth the pain and discomfort for a few minutes of his pleasure. I already give the world's best blowjobs... don't look a gifthorse in the mouth, LOL! Besides, it shouldn't be ALL about him ;)

[ErosUrge]

Well, we've been together for a long time and he's not going anywhere. I've tried it numerous times, but what I don't get is this. He has my tight pussy, we BOTH enjoy that. I'm not worried about getting used to it so I can enjoy it. I could care less about anal for myself, it's not important to me, FOR me. No one wants hemorrhoids, anyway. I only do it for him. Don't get me wrong, I love pleasing my man, but I just don't know if it's worth the pain and discomfort for a few minutes of his pleasure. I already give the world's best blowjobs... don't look a gifthorse in the mouth, LOL! Besides, it shouldn't be ALL about him ;)

I get it and understand. I wasn't trying to convince you otherwise. And no, it's not all about him...who would ever want that kind of relationship? As far as the hemorrhoids go, that doesn't happen to everyone. In fact, it doesn't happen to most people.....just wanted to clarify that. No doubt, you both have something great together and I wish you both the best.

[maxtor]

my gf and i had our first full sex anal session the other morning. we had incooperated a bit of anal with our regular sessions but the other morning i woke up with a screaming hard on, not a piss hard, and horny as hell, and began poking around with the head of my cock on her and finally got the Ky out cause she is usually a bit dry and put an ample amount on my cock and started back to the usual poking around and entered her pussy just a bit and pulled out and poked again and hit the other hole and she moaned just a bit with pleasure so i slowly pushed it in a bit, then a bit farter, then a bit farther until i was completely in her all the way to the balls. she loved the feeling and me also, was so tight and hot..i stroked it a few times and she began backing up and i gave her a flurry of all the way to the hilt and i blowed in her and had cum running out of her when i pulled out. she loves it and we will keep going as long as we can.

[hgf33]

I get it and understand. I wasn't trying to convince you otherwise. And no, it's not all about him...who would ever want that kind of relationship? As far as the hemorrhoids go, that doesn't happen to everyone. In fact, it doesn't happen to most people.....just wanted to clarify that. No doubt, you both have something great together and I wish you both the best.

I know you weren't trying to convince me otherwise, I wouldn't mind if you were. Like I said, I don't hate it. I love to please my man, and sometimes when I'm in the right mood, I just want to go for it, but that's impossible lol!! And I don't mean I get hemorrhoids, but people do. You say most people don't, but read up on it: it's a pretty common side effect, at least over time. Even pornstars will tell you that! I wish I liked it more but as long as everything else is good, I don't find it totally necessary, that's all I'm saying. And I am certainly not about to start cursing the fact that I got a man with a nice package! :-D Kudos to those who thoroughly enjoy anal, but for me, I can take it or leave it. (Better not tell my man that, he'll say "Take it, take it!!") LOL!! :-P

[csrakate]

Patience, lube, sometimes a numbing agent... But I just can't get into it. I end up pretty miserable during the act, and I feel bad, but now I just don't really do it at all.

A little word of caution to those who use numbing agents. Remember, things sometimes hurt for a reason....i.e. it's pushing limits as to what is safe and comfortable for the receiver. Numbing that pain can sometimes lead to damage. So...don't overdo the numbing. If anal sex is causing extreme discomfort or pain, it may not be right for you.

[JP1986UM]

I have quite the conundrum when it comes to anal.

My wife and I have anal sex once in awhile when we are both really horny and its always very wonderful and hot. She loves getting slammed while using her Wonder Wand (tm) on her pussy and having tremendous orgasms while I am fucking her ass.

Yesterday, I was having sex with my BF and for the first time we were going to have anal and I went flaccid trying to enter him. I love getting fucked and it always is exactly what I want, but I can't top another man. I am so disappointed.

can't quite put my finger on it.....maybe my gay side is a total bottom? but my hetero side isn't?

Confusing.

[hgf33]

A little word of caution to those who use numbing agents. Remember, things sometimes hurt for a reason....i.e. it's pushing limits as to what is safe and comfortable for the receiver. Numbing that pain can sometimes lead to damage. So...don't overdo the numbing. If anal sex is causing extreme discomfort or pain, it may not be right for you.

Yeah, honestly I didn't know this years ago, but I have learned, after already using numbing agents, that you shouldn't. I should've known better, since it's the exact same reason I won't take pain medication. However, the stuff I have is simply benzocaine. I still feel everything, just maybe a tad bit less. It doesn't completely numb anything. I've only used it once though, for fear of reactions to it, and also because the amount of lube required just washes it away anyhow.

Has anyone had any luck with training kits? I have a small plug, but if I see anything bigger, it scares me! And what about things that vibrate? I've often thought that maybe that would feel better and relax me more.

[sparkmaster69]

This actually makes a lot of sense about the genital structures being parallel between the genders. I never thought about that but the prostate and the g-spot in women are essentially in the same location. Which further supports the fact that at a certain point during gestation, we are both sexes....or am I going out on a limb with this thought? Either way, it makes sense to me. Thanks.

Ah Nooo. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/G-spot