w00ki33
Jul 9, 2011, 9:00 AM
Hi,
I have a problem that I'm guessing is not completely unique, so I hope you folks can help me.
So far the only experience with other men has been cyber. I've never been explicit about my sexuality, but I've never denied it either. It's more that nobody has really asked, and I don't think it's their business. I don't go around publicly ogling women, and I don't say homophobic things, so I didn't think I was being hypocritical. If people assume I'm straight, that's their opinion.
I have recently gotten back into dating. Even though I'm attracted to both genders, I am looking for a woman right now. So in online dating sites I've said "man seeking woman" and felt that I was being honest.
Except now I'm on a site where it asks for oientation, and I chickened out and put down straight. I don't know if I'm ready to come out as bi to people I know.
So now I feel like I'm lying, but at the same time I'm just not ready to take that plunge.
What should I do? I know that if I meet someone thatI will have to tell them that I'm "bi-curious," but that's between us. But that means that I would run the risk of thinking that I lied to them. I am honest about my opinions on sexuality, and I would not date someone who is not open-minded about this. I want to be honest, but I'm scared.
I read once that "there is no such thing as bi behaviour, only bi histories." By that definition, I'm not really bi. But I'm not really straight either. HELP!
I have a problem that I'm guessing is not completely unique, so I hope you folks can help me.
So far the only experience with other men has been cyber. I've never been explicit about my sexuality, but I've never denied it either. It's more that nobody has really asked, and I don't think it's their business. I don't go around publicly ogling women, and I don't say homophobic things, so I didn't think I was being hypocritical. If people assume I'm straight, that's their opinion.
I have recently gotten back into dating. Even though I'm attracted to both genders, I am looking for a woman right now. So in online dating sites I've said "man seeking woman" and felt that I was being honest.
Except now I'm on a site where it asks for oientation, and I chickened out and put down straight. I don't know if I'm ready to come out as bi to people I know.
So now I feel like I'm lying, but at the same time I'm just not ready to take that plunge.
What should I do? I know that if I meet someone thatI will have to tell them that I'm "bi-curious," but that's between us. But that means that I would run the risk of thinking that I lied to them. I am honest about my opinions on sexuality, and I would not date someone who is not open-minded about this. I want to be honest, but I'm scared.
I read once that "there is no such thing as bi behaviour, only bi histories." By that definition, I'm not really bi. But I'm not really straight either. HELP!