Wife in board...

[Csadv76]

A few years ago me and my wife had an affair with a couple. She got to have her first bisexual encounter. At the time I wasn't interested in guy. Now I've always been into ass play and now I want to take it to the next step. So when I tell her I want to be with a guy she flat out refuses. Doesn't even want to here about it. Dead set against it. Anyone else run into this? I'd love to make it a shared thing between me her and lucky number three or four. But if
I have to I'll probably end up going behind her back.

[thicknthin47]

Wow, I was in the same boat! After watching her with other women
It made me wonder what it would be like. Well after years and years
Went by it turned into a very strong urge,to the point I had to tell her
Or go behind her back. But I knew I. Could never hurt her like that.
So one night with a lot of help from beer I. Told her. She was shocked
But very suppoertive. I got to find out what it was like and enjoyed
It a lot . My advice be honest with her

[dbltrbl69]

Hmm sounds like my ex wife, which makes me laugh now since my girlfriend went down on her last week and got her in our bed for a 3some. Sounds like she wants her cake and eat it too. Does she still feel like she wants to play with women? Its totally unfair, glad my girlfriend is hot bout my bisexuality, and having adventures together. Good luck man, I know what it was like to have to cheat for some cock.

[Noboundaries]

Okay, unless your wife's body has changed significantly since your foursome it probably isn't body image issues.

Also, unless you already know the reason for her flat out refusal, I suspect it has to do with one or both of the following.

First, has she ever expressed any interest in MM porn in the past or made supportive MM comments? If not she may have a society programmed prejudice against MM behavior. FF in western society is much more accepted than MM. The Lifestyle community is an example. FF is readily accepted but MM is verboten by most clubs and groups.

Second, and definitely related to the first issue, she doesn't have an image of you in her mind that includes the MM behavior you're describing. She sees you in her mind as her knight in shining armor, her hero. To see you in a MM situation would tarnish that image significantly, possibly irreparably. It is for that reason I caution strongly against cheating.

Yeah, this is a tough one for you. Confident communication with her is really your only hope of understanding her position then coming up with an acceptable solution.

I speak from experience. Even though my wife had MM fantasies and was supportive of my bisexuality, it took her ten years to get to the point she was ready to make something happen, then she said "you go first and tell me all about it." She wasn't ready to see me that way. After hearing about a couple of encounters though, she was ready and now loves participating when or if it happens.

[Csadv76]

She still wants to play with other girls. The problem with the last couple was the emotional attachment we had with them. I think I've learned my lesson and to leave my emotions at the door with other couples. She doesn't want to get burned again. Not really sure exactly what her hang up is with me doing MM. Like the other guy that replied, I'd rather do my first time w/o her there. I know these feelings aren't going to go away. Sometimes I can get her to use toys on me. Even bought a strap-on but she's reluctant to use it.

[Noboundaries]

Yeah, we learned that lesson about emotional attachments too. We experienced it with two couples we played with simultaneously for over five years. The nice thing is that the fun lasted over 5 years. The bad thing was breaking up with them was no different than breaking up period. It hurts, but my wife and I had each other for support. Our marriage was never in jeopardy at all. It was fun for me having girlfriends with bi husbands and her boyfriends with bi wives.

If it is an emotional pain issue I understand her hesitance to go there again. It sucks (no pun intended).