Why are there way too many straight women on this site?

[drugstore cowboy]

I joined this site to meet other bisexual men and women but I see lots of posts by women who are straight and are not bisexual at all yet they decide to go here, hang out, and treat this site as though it's a social club.

What gives I thought this was a site for bisexuals? The site is bisexual.com and it's advertised as "The bisexual community site".

[Long Duck Dong]

community as in gathering....... IE bisexuals, partners of bisexuals, bisexual allies and supporters.... and that covers the straight ladies here.....

now drew had the foresight to allow the ignore option for people that do not what to read some posts by some posters..... feel free to use it.....

but I am guessing that some people are the stereotypical people that feel that they need to be able to see and read posts by people, so they have justification for their issues with people posting.... its a bit like the anti porn people that have a large porn collection that they view so they know what they are complaining about......

but if you really feel that the nature of the site is not to your standards, feel free to complain to drew that partners of bisexuals are posting in the site and that you feel, as a bisexual, that they should be excluded from a site that is a community site and a site for bisexuals and their partners

[by~his~side]

Druggie,
Before the problem of "way too many straight women" can be resolved we'd need to know what you feel the acceptable number of our type would be. If we lessen the herd to include the only slightly straight would you be happy? Would we be less annoying if we only accessed the site during the slowest periods of the day/night? Perhaps we could limit our posts to less than 25 characters? May we remain in the chat room if we sit in the corner and never join a typed conversation?
Please.......we just want to fit in.

~D~

[tenni]

Interestingly, if you check out the poll on the people's sexuality on this site, you find that those who responded were overwhelmingly bisexual (88%). The heterosexuals who responded to the poll was third with just over 6%. That's a huge difference. (second largest group was under the catch all others group of "other"? )

It may appear that there are a lot of heterosexual women on this site though if you go by the forum comments but I believe most forum comments are from bisexuals. I believe that the vast majority of heterosexual women on this site are very respectful towards bisexuals having this as a space for bisexuals to share and learn. I think that most heterosexuals who post are women and most comment very seldom other than asking or answering a question about their bisexual partner or their relationships.

However, there may be one or two verbose, opinionated heterosexual women who post much more so on a wide range of topics. One heterosexual woman has racked up over three thousand four hundred posts since 2008 that may make a new bisexual poster think that there are a lot of hetero women here...:bigrin:

[Long Duck Dong]

Interestingly, if you check out the poll on the people's sexuality on this site, you find that those who responded were overwhelmingly bisexual (88%). The heterosexuals who responded to the poll was third with just over 6%. That's a huge difference. (second largest group was under the catch all others group of "other"? )

It may appear that there are a lot of heterosexual women on this site though if you go by the forum comments but I believe most forum comments are from bisexuals. I believe that the vast majority of heterosexual women on this site are very respectful towards bisexuals having this as a space for bisexuals to share and learn. I think that most heterosexuals who post are women and most comment very seldom other than asking or answering a question about their bisexual partner or their relationships.

However, there may be one or two verbose, opinionated heterosexual women who post much more so on a wide range of topics. One heterosexual woman has racked up over three thousand four hundred posts since 2008 that may make a new bisexual poster think that there are a lot of hetero women here...:bigrin:

and dammit it, shes talked about child birth, being married to a cheating partner, being in a relationship with a bisexual, being a parent, having tattoos, anal sex, being heteroflexible, having a monogamous bisexual partner, etc etc

now I am sure, tenni that we can shut her up, but are you going to give help and advice about giving birth, being a parent, having anal, having tattoos...and other aspects of life that are not confined to bisexuals only.. ????

and yes, tenni, you could also give your opinion about being the hetero female partner of a bisexual male...... since a hetero female partner is clearly wrong for doing so in the site

[mikey3000]

Meow!!!!!

Tenni's just giving an opinion. Chill.

[bigbadmax]

seems to me to be several options.

Ignore
leave site
agree to disagree
take your fight elsewhere
get a bloody big gun and take turns to blow brains out- messy and pointless.

[Long Duck Dong]

max, you forgot one

create a site where a person can dictate terms of who can post and what

lol I have been a forums mod and site admin in other sites.... its not a nice job and many times I had to smile and allow opinions that I disagreed with, and people that I disliked, to post... but it was a community site I created, not a closed access site.....

but for the people that want a closed bisexual site, they can go to shybiguy or whatever its called... I have been told that it has restricted bi males and bi females forums and that would appear to be more in line with what some people in this site want......

honestly by the sounds of it, that site sounds more like a site where non bisexual opinions are not allowed, but I have no idea... I have never gone there to find out

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

lol There are many of us bi-females here. You just dont know us, evidently. And so what if there IS a fair amount of non-bi females here? We bi-ones out-weigh the non-bi ladies, but it matters not to us. We love and like them for who they are, not just their sexuality. Just because they arent bi doesnt make them any less of a woman, it Does means that they have as much right here as anyone else, and are here for a myriad of reasons.
To these ladies I send a big MUAH! for you just being You. :female:
Yer Cat.

[bizel]

mikey, would you not defend your partner if they were attacked?? ldd is 100% correct to defend his partner. dd does offer a lot of useful advice and support. and tenni's comment came across as a poorly veiled attack. simply not naming her outright seems a weak attempt to adhere to the 'no personal attacks' thingo. i respect ldd for coming out swinging. i would not respect any partner that did any less. when you care about someone, you guard their back. that comment did not seem like just an opinion at all. and the cheesy grin at the end patronising.

besides all that, too many straight women? do you mean on the forums, or in the chat room, drugstore cowboy? i'm straight with bi hubby and don't chat cos it seems to be more of a sexual nature and that i reserve strictly for hubby. as for the forum, if i can offer suggestions or support to someone in need, i won't hesitate. i think my situation offers an interesting angle that adds to the colourful world of bi marriages. there's learning to be had on both sides. being bi is not exclusively the issue of bi's, drugstore cowboy. not if you want to fit into a community of all sorts. and what if you fall for someone who is not bi, but you want them to accept you and understand, what will you do? how will you help them understand the emotional and sexual issues attached to being bi or coping with a bi partner? just introduce them to this site. generally we're pretty friendly, caring. here, it seems you can ask any question, sexual or not, and get a range of level-headed answers. without this site, i would have gone mad, ended my marriage and hated everyone attached to the word 'bisexual'. as it is, i have discovered a whole new world i didn't even know of and met some lovely supportive people who helped me keep grounded. this kind of site is, in my limited experience, rare. i love my on-line family. if you want to be accepted in life, you have to first learn to accept. hug, b.

p.s. cat, MUAH right back at yah! big squishy hug.

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

Muahs back at you too, Biz. ;)
And this is a very true statement "and tenni's comment came across as a poorly veiled attack."
Those two have been raging war with each other forever now, so its a common thing. Its a no win situation, so dont pay it any mind. That's for them to work out, hon. :cool:

You too provide a great deal of insight into the mindset of a non-bi woman married to/involved with, a bi-male. Many non-bi ladies come here to learn about being bi, or to just simply try and understand what its like to be with a bi-partner. They read, they ask questions and try to get enlightment from some of us. Its a great thing. Not everyone here is the same..it would be kind of boring it we all were. You ladies are welcomed here..otherwise Drew would have said something about it Way before now.
So dont stress it, its all good..:}
Cat
Some peoples favorite pussy...lol

[bisocialnudist]

I love straight woman who love bisexuals, I'm married to one LOL. Woman who accept, know and understand bisexuals make GREAT friends. I want open minded people that will accept me in all my social circles. When I have coffee or go to dinner with a woman that hangs out at bisexual.com I KNOW I am among friends and I have done just that with one of our wonderful longtime straight site members.

I just want to weigh in as I appreciate anyone and everyone who come here with a positive attitude about the joys of living life as a bisexual. Even better if they come in the door not quite so sure and leave thinking bisexuals are the best thing since sliced bread, after all most of us are. There are all kinds of sites for bisexuals one size dosnt have to fit all bisexual.com has something for everyone as they say take what you can use and leave behind the rest.

Mark

[tenni]

Cat
From my perspective, the right approach is to discuss the issue rather than one person by name. In fact, I interpret the rules to indicate to discuss the issues rather than the person specifically. The issue of this thread is about the heterosexual women on this site and their visibility. The OP has stated that he wants to discuss things with bisexuals and not heterosexual women on a website for bisexuals. I think that is a significant point to pay attention to. Excessively vocal heterosexual women may reduce the comfort level for some bisexual men while others may want to know their viewpoint on some issues connected to bisexual men relating to heterosexual women, etc. The point is that a bisexual man would ask in the forum if he wanted to know a heterosexual woman's view.

You are a bisexual woman "in the life style" using your wording. You are not a heterosexual woman and so this is not about your posts on this site. For whatever reason the OP has expressed concern about heterosexual women on this website and I suspect it is in the forum. I too have concerns about how vocal heterosexual women impact this site's forum. As I stated imo one or two are excessive with their posts and may be damaging this website as being for and about bisexuals. I know the argument that you and some others have but the banner doesn't support your argument. This site is not for everyone and if a bisexual man states that he sees too many heterosexual women (commenting) it should be noted. I don't see too many heterosexual women (posting). I see one or two who are excessively posting to the point of interfering with bisexuals discussing their issues amongst themselves. I suspect that you do not see this that way. I don't think that there are really a lot of posters compared to the number of members that you see on the side. There are not a lot of female members compared to men and so if women do post those who are admitting to being heterosexual stand out and especially if they post a lot. The survey indicates that there are not a lot of heterosexuals on this site. There certainly are not a lot of heterosexual men posting on this site and I doubt that there are a lot of heterosexual men on this site.

Mark
I do not know a lot of bisexual websites that have bisexuals discussing their sexuality. I find that this website does to some degree but its mixture of vocal spouses of bisexuals strongly influence what is discussed.


[QUOTE=Cherokee_Mountaincat;198593]Muahs back at you too, Biz. ;)
And this is a very true statement "and tenni's comment came across as a poorly veiled attack."
Those two have been raging war with each other forever now, so its a common thing. Its a no win situation, so dont pay it any mind. That's for them to work out, hon. :cool:

[elian]

My, aren't the flames burning brightly. Can someone please pass me a bag of marshmallows and a big pointy stick?

As near as I can figure this site was created for bisexuals but also includes allies. I believe that it is BETTER than your typical personals or "hook-up" site because It seems to recogize these four things:

1) There is a whole spectrum of sexual behavior and desire.

2) Bisexual people do not live in a vacuum apart from straight, gay, lesbian and transgender people.

3) Bisexual people do not live apart from their spouses, families and communities (at least usually not by choice).

4) The sexual nature of a bisexual person is only a part of who they are as a whole person.

[Long Duck Dong]

My, aren't the flames burning brightly. Can someone please pass me a bag of marshmallows and a big pointy stick?

As near as I can figure this site was created for bisexuals but also includes allies. I believe that it is BETTER than your typical personals or "hook-up" site because It seems to recogize these four things:

1) There is a whole spectrum of sexual behavior and desire.

2) Bisexual people do not live in a vacuum apart from straight, gay, lesbian and transgender people.

3) Bisexual people do not live apart from their spouses, families and communities (at least usually not by choice).

4) The sexual nature of a bisexual person is only a part of who they are as a whole person.

awwww elian... but if we allow non bisexuals / partners to post, we can not post as many * do you swallow or spit * or * suck or fuck * or * how do force my partner to do what I want for our relationship * threads, cos there will be too many interesting threads interfering with our over done threads
:tong::tong::tong::tong:

seriously tho.... I loved reading threads by people from around the world, that were bisexual and partners of bisexuals....as it gave me a insight into different countries.... even tho I argued with marie delta, her threads and her insight into relationships as a bisexual trans lady in the us, gave me a interesting view of a different way of life in a different country

I tend to have the view point that as a asexual / celibate bisexual male in a long term, long distance relationship, is unique and gives a different insight as opposed to the normal * bi male with straight partner, having casual sex * scenerios......

if it was not for the hetero partners posting, we would not hear the *other side of the story * and gain insight into how they cope and deal with having a open relationship with a bisexual partner......

and if it was not for the site troll, brent L.A aka hot fun summer time, aka horned up ram, aka drugstore cowboy, ... then tenni would not have any support with his own opinions :tong::tong::tong::tong:

[tenni]

Elian
Really?...not a hook up site. I suspect that many men come to this site for a hook up ...not all but a good number. :rolleyes:

The banner of this site makes no reference to allies of bisexuals. Isn't that just a wish of a small number of posters? It makes reference to spouses of bisexuals but no further clarification is given. Although bisexuals do live in the real world of others and in particular heteros, we are marginalized and need a safe place to discuss our issues without mainstream (heterosexual) and gay voices imposing their perspective. I see that as foremost importance for this site's forum. I had never heard about bi erasure until I read it on this site.

I do think that there are several who do their best to make bisexuals comfortable here. However, some of those same people attempt to control differing voices (ie declaring a differing voice as a troll etc.) Some bisexual men may not be comfortable discussing matters amongst heterosexual women if these women are very visible/vocal with their posts.

[orangejelly]

@ Tenni ,I think we should all be aware that this site like many others like it are full of bisexuals as well as curious, interested and as well as ALL and ANY of the LGBT's as well as our straights allies!

I think it is they who should air caution at the content and respect the differences maybe explicit truth and/or fantasy, that all of the bisexuals wishing to open up and express on the site. Not the other way round Tenni that's just obvious respect!
As this is a site for you to be who you are and talk freely, go ahead :).

[orangejelly]

sorry i didnt explain that very well :( what i meant was...

what was said is bisexual men want to speak on this site, and hetro woman are present and its uncomtable (it sounded like something like that) and i was saying it is for them to feel uncomfy around the bi's not the bi's to feel uncomfy around them, - its a bisexual site.

Hetro or bisexual women (or men for that matter), should not try to put anyone in boxes and expect others to live and think by the standard they set as bisexual. Being bisexual means different things and has different aspects of lifestyle and thoughts to an another bisexual. If people want to be judgemental of others in the same 'category' as them they should join a political forum not a bisexual one!!:flag1:

[wrbi01]

WAIT!!! Everyone missed that Drugstore Cowboy (the Seagull Poster*) logged into this site to meet more Bisexual MEN.... so Really we should see if Drew will limit the site to only Bisexual MEN for his satisfaction. WAIT!!! I have an idea.. if he wants a site with only Bisexual men.. he should get the money together.. hire a programing team and build one just for him. In fact he could make it to where he was the ONLY Bisexual man on the site. Then he could post what he wanted to someone who would care about his intrests. Personally I have not seen a positive post from him to any thread. Its always bashing something. I normally just ignore his posts but this is his thread and I value his opinion so much. I would read more of what he said... but I really must go water the driveway it is in dire need of water.


*Seagull Poster - Flys in and shits on everything and flys away.

[Katja]

sorry i didnt explain that very well :( what i meant was...

what was said is bisexual men want to speak on this site, and hetro woman are present and its uncomtable (it sounded like something like that) and i was saying it is for them to feel uncomfy around the bi's not the bi's to feel uncomfy around them, - its a bisexual site.

Hetro or bisexual women (or men for that matter), should not try to put anyone in boxes and expect others to live and think by the standard they set as bisexual. Being bisexual means different things and has different aspects of lifestyle and thoughts to an another bisexual. If people want to be judgemental of others in the same 'category' as them they should join a political forum not a bisexual one!!:flag1:

In my experience, men usually have no difficulty in expressing themselves in anonymity no matter who they are communicating with so let us dispense with that nonsense. The presence of straight people or bisexual women in a forum or chat rarely constrains them.

I see little sign of people trying to put anyone into boxes. There are broad categorisations, but thats the way of the world. All human beings are so complex and varied that such an exercise is futile. Society I accept does try to fit square pegs into round holes and usually with very messy results. There is also little sign of people demanding others live as they would expect, although to be fair, there is a recurring criticism of dishonesty for people screwing around behind their partners backs and trying to justify that on the grounds that their partner would not understand.

Making judgements is quite another issue, and those who claim to be non judgmental are usually as judgmental as the next person.

[tenni]

Katja
You may be correct according to your own experience. Your experience with this site is less than two months long. I have been a member of this site since 2006 (previous name artjock) but only really vocal since 2009. I've also been a member of a bisexual site that only permits men and let me tell you the conversations are quite different than those on this site. I was surprised at how open these men are with each other when no women are on the site. There is not the usual male bravado and bs either. The topics are under a variety of categories including grooming. I don't usually hear or see men being so open on body grooming (manscaping) and clothing. I've never read a thread on this site about manscaping...lol They write very affectionately about their relationship with women and the challenges without having to be guarded about "offending" a woman. They actually seem less sexually graphic than guys who post on this site. They do not condemn each other for how a guy deals with his bisexuality whether it is with a man or a woman ..... I'm just say'n.

But the issue of this thread is not about women per sei. It is about communicating with bisexuals both bi guys and bi women rather than reading what he sees as a lot of posts/opinions from hetero women on this site.


In my experience, men usually have no difficulty in expressing themselves in anonymity no matter who they are communicating with so let us dispense with that nonsense. The presence of straight people or bisexual women in a forum or chat rarely constrains them.

I see little sign of people trying to put anyone into boxes. There are broad categorisations, but thats the way of the world. All human beings are so complex and varied that such an exercise is futile. Society I accept does try to fit square pegs into round holes and usually with very messy results. There is also little sign of people demanding others live as they would expect, although to be fair, there is a recurring criticism of dishonesty for people screwing around behind their partners backs and trying to justify that on the grounds that their partner would not understand.

Making judgements is quite another issue, and those who claim to be non judgmental are usually as judgmental as the next person.

[littlerayofsunshine]

Katja
You may be correct according to your own experience. Your experience with this site is less than two months long. I have been a member of this site since 2006 (previous name artjock) but only really vocal since 2009. I've also been a member of a bisexual site that only permits men and let me tell you the conversations are quite different. You might be surprised at how open these men are with each other when no women are on the site. There is not the usual male bravado and bs either. The topics are under a variety of categories including grooming. I don't usually hear or see men being so open on body grooming (manscaping) and clothing. I've never read a thead on this site about manscaping...lol They speak very affectionate about their relationship with women and the challenges without having to be guarded about "offending" a woman. They actually seem less sexually graphic than guys who post on this site. ..... I'm just say'n.

But the issue of this thread is not about women per sei. It is about communicating with bisexuals both bi guys and bi women rather than reading a lot of posts from hetero women on this site.

That is great that there is a site where men can go and feel openly to express themselves as they wish among their male peers. It might be nice and helpful for other men who wish to have that same experience to know the link so they may also visit? Feel free to post it.... No one should have to be dedicated to one website for all their needs. I don't even think its possible to have all your needs met by one website.

I don't really read alot of posts from heterosexual women. Possibly due to fact I don't search them out or make them a focus of my reading material. So its not bothersome to me. And I'm sure there are a lot of men who need that heterosexual female perspective, a lot of them are married to one. And a lot of people know that you could take advice from a man if you want to catch woman. Take a woman's advice if you want to keep her.

IMHO. I think some people focus too much on what they complain about the most that it almost consumes them and makes them nothing more than a one dimensional dysfunctional arbitrator.


*lol smileyface*

[csrakate]

I've been inactive on this site lately....I've been enjoying my real life and merely "lurking" on the forum from time to time. I have to say that it disheartens me to see this same issue being argued between the same people. I don't know the OP but I suspect they may be "inciting" the argument once again. This isn't an issue of the sexual preference of posters but more of an issue of the inability of a select few who refuse to move past previous squabbles and insist on continuing this tired pissing match for pages and pages of forum space. Doesn't make me miss this place too much.....sigh!

[azirish]

Really? Straight women are rare these days!! Have you read any media reports "bi" women are soooo trendy!!!!:rolleyes:


I joined this site to meet other bisexual men and women but I see lots of posts by women who are straight and are not bisexual at all yet they decide to go here, hang out, and treat this site as though it's a social club.

What gives I thought this was a site for bisexuals? The site is bisexual.com and it's advertised as "The bisexual community site".

[BiBedBud]

IMO straight women are yummy too!:tong:

Ladies: this bisexual man is happy you're here, particularly if you're open to bisexual men like me.:2cents:

[The Dude]

I don't know if there are too many of any type of person at this website since I am new here. I do know that I have seen posts from several "straight" women that I consider very opinionated and in several cases hostile towards male bisexual members. I think that these women have certainly taken away from the community feeling of the site and brought a lot of baggage with them that we really don't need. As a bisexual member of a bisexual community I can honestly say that I joined this site for what I expected to be acceptance and at the very least tolerance from all PERIOD.

However, that being said I don't think that anyone should be judged on the basis of sex or orientation and that and member female or male or transgendered for that matter, straight, gay, or anywhere in between should have to keep silent if they feel passionate enough to answer or start a thread. But in the end no one should have to put up with or be tolerant of bigotry, sacasism masked as humor, or "baggage" from especially straight members regardless of sex. Leave that shit at the door please and thank you! We as bisexuals and homosexuals have put up with enough of that from the majority of the population outside of this community and don't really want your kind. (I am referring of course to those who choose to say those things mentioned above or bring their baggage with them.) I also have noticed that some "straight" members have changed their orientation to bisexual or bicurious which is fine as long as it's not a ploy to make their opinions more relevant and not to try and "fit in".

Ultimately, no one should be evaluated on any of the above mentioned criteria, and people should be judged on what they say and do not on sex or orientation; and if we are to weed out the bigots that's how it should be done.

Thanks of taking the time.

[dickhand]

Well said Long Duck Dong !

[maxtor]

i think the proclaimed "straight" women on this site is just not saying that they are interested in sex with the same gender but given the right setting and opportunity that they woulld enjoy a good experience with another woman or maybe join in a couple. i have seen a lot of women that will do things that they would never say they are interested in. some of the most goody two shoes women are wild behind closed doors as i have found out first hand. men are more outspoken and not afraid to express their needs or wishes. if someone asks me if i am bi i will tell them that i am but i dont volunteer the information due to so many homophobics out there that wants to do harm for our lifestyle. i think it is great to be bi. twice as likely to pick up someone at a bar than just straight. i love to play with a man and enjoy anal sex anytime i can get it. feels so great to feel that hot cock rocking in and out.

[tenni]

Littleray
The site for men only has been mentioned on this site several times. It is shybiguys.com

I agree with you that we should explore a variety of sources (web sites, peer in person meetings, etc.) This bisexual.com site has it pluses and minuses. Shybiguy has its pluses and minuses. Shybiguy is for men only and as I wrote that gives a clear difference in what and how things are communicated. "Drama" does not seem to be permitted. Sent to "banned my ass" land as a location...;)

Presently, I'd guess that it has a lot more younger men than this site but you do not place your age on shybiguy and so I'm just going by the content that is posted. It is very restrictive in some respects. It seems to be highly monitored by moderators.

Like here, you can read some of the threads without joining...but not all of the threads...like here I think? New members are restricted initially as to what sections that they may read or post on. Access is based on the number of posts that you make leads to reading other threads. Some men quickly/often post to get access to the "other" sections. I, myself, have still not reached that magic mark and I've been a member (this time) for almost a year. Some guys reach that mark in a week or two.

New members are kicked off quickly if they "hit on" other men to prevent a meat market atmosphere. It strongly states that it is not a site for sex pick ups etc. but a site for discussion between men and about their bisexuality. No transgendered (that I can tell), no women, no spouses... no gays but some biguys seem to lean to being more interested and savy about the same sex and the gay world..still they like women just not emotionally romantically. Others major primarily in women and have a minor in men :) (no emotion/romance attraction or some have emotion). Some are bi in same sex relationships with gay men).

The odd time a hetero woman slips in and asks a question like here. There is support and answers but if she were to continue to post I suspect that she would be banned. I've read where at other times the woman' posts have been moved into a separate section for women .

Like bi.com it has a chat room that doesn't seem to be used that much but I don't go to chat here or shybi. You can see near the banner the numbers in chat and so that is how I know.

I've noticed that once some guys reach the mark to access all sections, their posting frequency becomes reduced or they disappear...not sure how long or if permanently. In permancy of posters in that respect, it is a bit like this site. I think that it might be argued that how the shybiguy site is set up to function may also create a very different atmosphere not connected to the male gender. It migt also be argued that some guys tend to follow guy rules when amongst themselves more so than in mixed company...who's the boss/top dog kinda thing...maybe not. Guys will ostracize another guy who doesn't.

That is just my observations though. I'm an observer of life at times and then analyse and post. Get shit on sometimes..am an ass sometimes here. Want to communicate with other bisexuals of both genders....not interested in what an asexual believes or has to say...cuz I'm sensual and sexual...with a sex drive like most men and a some of my bisexual issues are beyond an asexual's ability to comprehend let alone empathize with. Interested in what a heterosexual woman might have to say about relating to biguys..not other stuff unless political...lol Don't want to campfire...and get a cookie...a hug once in awhile would be sweet..

Each site meets a need for bisexuals more or less depending upon the bi person's needs and desires but at least both are for bisexuals in a sea of monosexual (gay & hetero) sites. Just my opinion.

[QUOTE=littlerayofsunshine;198632]That is great that there is a site where men can go and feel openly to express themselves as they wish among their male peers. It might be nice and helpful for other men who wish to have that same experience to know the link so they may also visit? Feel free to post it.... No one should have to be dedicated to one website for all their needs. I don't even think its possible to have all your needs met by one website.

[FinkDoodle]

Umm . . I'm kind of shocked to see this subject posted.

For years I've heard nothing but complaints from bi men stating how frustrating it is to find straight women interested in bi guys.

Here you have the perfect forum for everbody to interact however they want to and suddenly there's a complaint about straight women being on a bi site??

I've been bi for about a decade and I'm sure I'm not the only one who truly appreciates the presence of straight women here. I've made some wonderful friends, had incredible dates and overall an incredibly positive and freeing experience with the women of this site.

To those of you who have a problem with straight women on a "bi" site . . I submit you're not exactly bi yourselves . . since the very definition of bi is to embrace both genders.

[softfruit]

I really don't think there are "too many" of anyone here.

Some of us, myself included, may seem to weigh in on almost every thread and that probably skews things: you just need someone who talks a lot (and feels they need mention their non-bi label often) to create an impression that lots of people here aren't bi, when it's just a few non-bi folks who feel they best wear a label for one reason or another.

We get quite a few partners of bis showing up here, asking for advice on what to do when they've just discovered their partner is bi, or when their partner wants to explore their sexuality and it's posing a challenge to the relationship.

I know that it might get a little repetitive for those of us who have been around a while, but I figure it's good for non-bi people to be able to ask those questions in a place where they won't just get told that there's no such thing as being bi, s/he's bound to leave you for a (man/woman) in the end, bis are just greedy disease carriers, that it's just plain wrong cos various gods say so, etc. We don't always give 'em the right answer, and we don't always give'em the one they want to hear, but at least those conversations happen with a basic level of respect for all sexualities rather than just the popular two.

[Annika L]

Funny, I would have thought that the OP's style was identifiable enough to those of us who've been here for a while...that most of us would just ignore garbage like this. Alas, it seems not.

I think the substance of tenni's post (88% bi, 6% straight...so < 6% straight women) gives the OP all the legitimate answer it deserves.

If you disagree, then by all means, all hail Kali!

[bizel]

I really don't think there are "too many" of anyone here.

Some of us, myself included, may seem to weigh in on almost every thread and that probably skews things: you just need someone who talks a lot (and feels they need mention their non-bi label often) to create an impression that lots of people here aren't bi, when it's just a few non-bi folks who feel they best wear a label for one reason or another.

We get quite a few partners of bis showing up here, asking for advice on what to do when they've just discovered their partner is bi, or when their partner wants to explore their sexuality and it's posing a challenge to the relationship.

I know that it might get a little repetitive for those of us who have been around a while, but I figure it's good for non-bi people to be able to ask those questions in a place where they won't just get told that there's no such thing as being bi, s/he's bound to leave you for a (man/woman) in the end, bis are just greedy disease carriers, that it's just plain wrong cos various gods say so, etc. We don't always give 'em the right answer, and we don't always give'em the one they want to hear, but at least those conversations happen with a basic level of respect for all sexualities rather than just the popular two.


soft fruit, i could kiss you. you hit the nail on the head. as a wife of bi, without this on-line family's support and advice, i could have easily hated 'bisexuality', and hubby for everything that's happened cos i was so scared and confused and hurt. you guys have given me insight, patience and compassion that i am so grateful for. i love you all dearly for that and will be eternally grateful. i have also discovered some lovely people here. i, in turn, hope i can offer back something to either help bi's understand the partner side, or the partner in my previous position. being bi is not just a one-sided issue - not unless you live on an island with a blow-up and don't want any kind of human relationship. and there are a lot of repeats - new people discovering what we've already been through. but from my point of view, having a thread answered when i was desperate made me feel 'not alone', and that people out there were actually talking to me, not me just reading a stale thread. the personal touch helped sooooo much. hug to all of you who helped me, b.

[softfruit]

bizel: :) :)

The same things can be said, in my experience, for a lot of the real-world bi spaces.

[Falling Leaves]

soft fruit, i could kiss you. you hit the nail on the head. as a wife of bi, without this on-line family's support and advice, i could have easily hated 'bisexuality', and hubby for everything that's happened cos i was so scared and confused and hurt. you guys have given me insight, patience and compassion that i am so grateful for. i love you all dearly for that and will be eternally grateful. i have also discovered some lovely people here. i, in turn, hope i can offer back something to either help bi's understand the partner side, or the partner in my previous position. being bi is not just a one-sided issue - not unless you live on an island with a blow-up and don't want any kind of human relationship. and there are a lot of repeats - new people discovering what we've already been through. but from my point of view, having a thread answered when i was desperate made me feel 'not alone', and that people out there were actually talking to me, not me just reading a stale thread. the personal touch helped sooooo much. hug to all of you who helped me, b.

ditto, thank you

[_someone_]

I haven't really come across a huge amount of it. However, I would welcome a straight woman if she was content with my sexuality.

I don't mind straight people being here, as it may give more allies. So many people I know either ignore bisexuality or are disgusted by the idea of it.

[FinkDoodle]

Personally I LOVE meeting straight women on this site . . there's none of the usual awkwardness about my sexuality and, quite frankly, that's kind of refreshing . .

Funny thing about the more "male oriented" bi sites . . they're primarily loaded with gay men just interested in trolling. Go figure . . .

[neveen]

straight women here give me the chance to try n turn 'em :cool:

[**Peg**]

Funny, I would have thought that the OP's style was identifiable enough to those of us who've been here for a while...that most of us would just ignore garbage like this. Alas, it seems not. all hail Kali!

yup...

[12voltman59]

Funny thing about the more "male oriented" bi sites . . they're primarily loaded with gay men just interested in trolling. Go figure . . .

Got that right, man--and as a bi guy who might talk to one of those gays---they will give ya that shit that "there is no such a thing as bisexuality--you are gay---just get real and admit it!!"

I also agree with the posts by Annika and Peg about the OP.

[Lisa (va)]

Why would folks be so concerned about another persons sexuality? Are they a 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 or 7 on the scale of sexuality ? Should this place be limited to one particular value of bisexual people ?

Thew only bad part I find with a straight women is if I am interested in her, I am not likely to succeed. LOL
But it is good to have views from different people, when I read a reply in any post I read the content of the post for it's worth: not to see if that person is straight, bi or gay, or even male or female for that matter.

Lisa

hugs n kisses

[BiBedBud]

I think, for some people, sexuality is a political issue, and for the rest of us it’s not.

To paraphrase MLK; A post should be judged by the character of its content, and not for the sexuality of its author.:2cents:

[drugstore cowboy]

Funny thing about the more "male oriented" bi sites . . they're primarily loaded with gay men just interested in trolling. Go figure . . .


Got that right, man--and as a bi guy who might talk to one of those gays---they will give ya that shit that "there is no such a thing as bisexuality--you are gay---just get real and admit it!!"

How would you both know? Have you ever actually met gay men and talked to them about your sexuality or bisexuality? Are you even friends with any gay men and out to them as bisexual?

I can see how if you are not out and if you're closeted, discrete, or on the down low about being bisexual how you'd assume this about gay men as a whole or as a bad homophobic stereotype.

I've met lots of gay men both in person and on the internet, even before there was the internet. Never once have I had one of them tell me, "Bisexuality doesn't exist in men! You're just gay!" when I told them about how I'm bisexual and talked about my sexuality with them, or when the subject of bisexuality came up in a topic posted on a board, in a chat room, or in conversation.

I have been on male oriented sites for gay and bisexual men and the gay men who happen to post on such sites are not biphobic like you described.

[bizel]

Umm . . I'm kind of shocked to see this subject posted.

For years I've heard nothing but complaints from bi men stating how frustrating it is to find straight women interested in bi guys.

Here you have the perfect forum for everbody to interact however they want to and suddenly there's a complaint about straight women being on a bi site??

I've been bi for about a decade and I'm sure I'm not the only one who truly appreciates the presence of straight women here. I've made some wonderful friends, had incredible dates and overall an incredibly positive and freeing experience with the women of this site.

To those of you who have a problem with straight women on a "bi" site . . I submit you're not exactly bi yourselves . . since the very definition of bi is to embrace both genders.

byron, i love your attitude and it is the reason i keep in touch. you are open minded and truly enjoy both sexes.

i read comments such as this "The odd time a hetero woman slips in and asks a question like here. There is support and answers but if she were to continue to post I suspect that she would be banned. I've read where at other times the woman' posts have been moved into a separate section for women.", reveal more about the person than i think the person realises. it comes across as anti-women. it sounds to me like something out of a bitter gay man's mouth. for some reason the fact that this site is for bisexuals and partners of bisexuals and others that just love and support bisexuals or are interested in the bisexual angle - ALL IRREGUARDLESS OF GENDER, seems to be something some people just can't/won't accept. it shows that no matter how 'intellectual' we may think we are, we all have blind spots. i for one, am fed up hearing such nonsense. it's not important and not relevant. what is relevant is supporting each other.

[slaphappypud]

..................


I've met lots of gay men both in person and on the internet, even before there was the internet. Never once have I had one of them tell me, "Bisexuality doesn't exist in men! You're just gay!" when I told them about how I'm bisexual and talked about my sexuality with them, or when the subject of bisexuality came up in a topic posted on a board, in a chat room, or in conversation.

I have been on male oriented sites for gay and bisexual men and the gay men who happen to post on such sites are not biphobic like you described.


I've run into several people on both sides of the fence who claim there is no such thing as a bisexual, that I'm just confused....:eek:

I've often thought about challenging them with an offer to do them and their spouse, just so they can see the reality of it first hand!:tongue:

Your life experiences are your own, don't assume that everyone shares them.

As for the straight wimmenz on here, as long as they are part of the bunch it's all good. I like hearing their take on us weird bisexual types.

[Pasadenacpl2]

Wow. Just...wow. I go off for a few months to take a break and what do I come back to? The same old shit. For those playing the home version:

A faked account posts something that seems to innocently address a topic Tenni has been ranting about for awhile. Check.

Tenni posts in support of that position. Check (and was first poster, too)

Drama ensues.

Here is the truth of the matter, Tenni. You claim to be worried about the health of this site and it's purpose. If you are truly concerned then shut the fuck up. You, Tenni, have run off far more people than any hetero woman ever has with your incessant rants, your anti American ravings, your lack of anything resembling the use of logos or ethos in your arguments, your vendettas, and your driving need to run off anyone who doesn't fit the box of people you want on this site.

I thought, perhaps, it was me. So I removed myself for awhile. But, from the looks of things, you're just as insufferable now as you were when I left.

Before you attempt to get the splinter in DDs eye, you'd better call a logging company to get the tree out of yours.

Not that the OP deserves being responded to, but I love the fact that there are women here who I don't have to explain my sexuality to. And my wife happens to dig bi guys.

Pasa

[drugstore cowboy]

Interestingly, if you check out the poll on the people's sexuality on this site, you find that those who responded were overwhelmingly bisexual (88%). The heterosexuals who responded to the poll was third with just over 6%. That's a huge difference. (second largest group was under the catch all others group of "other"? )

It may appear that there are a lot of heterosexual women on this site though if you go by the forum comments but I believe most forum comments are from bisexuals. I believe that the vast majority of heterosexual women on this site are very respectful towards bisexuals having this as a space for bisexuals to share and learn. I think that most heterosexuals who post are women and most comment very seldom other than asking or answering a question about their bisexual partner or their relationships.

However, there may be one or two verbose, opinionated heterosexual women who post much more so on a wide range of topics. One heterosexual woman has racked up over three thousand four hundred posts since 2008 that may make a new bisexual poster think that there are a lot of hetero women here...:bigrin:

Thank you for the clarification.

The poll you wrote about does show that mostly bisexual post here but then you have a few hetero women who have nothing better to do than rack up posts and go on about their mundane lives and relationships, or some of them reply to every post even if the topic and subject do not apply to them at all since the topic and its subject are about bisexual men and women only and the topic and subject have nothing to do with heterosexuality or heterosexuals at all.

[verruckt_wut]

Society frowns on Bi men, both from straights and even gays, a lot of straight women have secret fantasies of watching two guys like most guys do with the lesbian/bi girl thing... the difference is just like society these women have to go along with the anti - male thing fearing they will be judged...

we all know how women can be in the image department...since two women eating pussy is revered and encouraged, two guys sucking cocks is not...so maybe all of these straight girls have a real curiosity about it...its nothing really to worry about I might add

[centillini]

i don't care if they are straight on here, as long as they are at least willing to watch

[elian]

I see "meeting other bisexual men" going on in the chat more than the forums.. If you can't take a compliment from a lady maybe you ought to broaden your horizons a little bit. I've been posting here for a while now and I have NEVER seen a regular member who identifies as straight ever personally disparage someone for their sexual preference..I HAVE seen some supposedly bisexual people take offense at OTHER orientations.

I had considered the idea of a "bisexuals only" posting area but that does seem rather peculiar - like straight people could read the posts but not post there? Almost seems childish although I know some of you have expressed that you need a safe space to vent/talk about what you are feeling as bi.

[mikey3000]

Maybe even take it a step further and have a section for bi men and bi women separately as each gender experiences it differently...no?

[æonpax]

i don't care if they are straight on here, as long as they are at least willing to watch

I'm curious as to what you mean by that. I'm Bi and occasionally get PMs from guys wanting to talk to be about their m/m sexual exploits, etc. Now, just becuase I'm bi and respect their orientation, doesn't mean that stuff interests me, anymore than a female telling me about her f/f encounters. To each their own.

[elian]

I think he was expressing a fantasy aeon..

[dafydd]

I joined this site to meet other bisexual men and women but I see lots of posts by women who are straight and are not bisexual at all yet they decide to go here, hang out, and treat this site as though it's a social club.

What gives I thought this was a site for bisexuals? The site is bisexual.com and it's advertised as "The bisexual community site".

"Bisexual Community Site."
Exactly. Bisexual *community* isn't just made up of bisexuals.
You think every bisexual is married to or has to date another bisexual? Any bisexual community event/site/network I can't take my straight girlf along to, or have her feel comfortable to post on is seriously confused.
Does it make you feel bashful, like you don't want to talk about sex infront of straight women here or something? How do they stop you from meeting people? Id have thought alienating women (and men) in general with the way you phrased the post and its title might account for that.


d

[Jobelorocks]

I am a bisexual woman and I have to say is the person who's advice on any subject I trust more than anyone else's is my straight husband's. Also, I know that straight or homosexual partners of bisexual people may have insight on bisexual issues or want insight from bisexuals on bisexual issues. My husband is way more open minded about my issues then many bisexuals I know (not to mention he doesn't have a superiority complex which I have also encountered sometimes in other bisexuals.)

[Realist]

The only people we have too many of, are those who would resent others joining, for whatever their reason.

[want2havefun]

I think, for some people, sexuality is a political issue, and for the rest of us it’s not.




Yep! Some just want to push an agenda.

[Jobelorocks]

The only people we have too many of, are those who would resent others joining, for whatever their reason.

Amen to that. I think that straight and homosexual men and women have plenty in common with me. Most of my life has nothing to do with sex or my sexuality and I am sure that is true of them also. We all have different life experiences and that is why we can all learn from each other.

[12voltman59]

Amen to that. I think that straight and homosexual men and women have plenty in common with me. Most of my life has nothing to do with sex or my sexuality and I am sure that is true of them also. We all have different life experiences and that is why we can all learn from each other.

Amen to that, Jobel--you rule!!!---I would say that with what you posted---that's enuff said!!

:bowdown: :bowdown: :bowdown:

[bityme]

I joined this site to meet other bisexual men and women but I see lots of posts by women who are straight and are not bisexual at all yet they decide to go here, hang out, and treat this site as though it's a social club.

What gives I thought this was a site for bisexuals? The site is bisexual.com and it's advertised as "The bisexual community site".

The majority of the straight women I have noticed have come here either to support or understand their bisexual mates. I think it's great! Whatever we can do to promote greater understanding and communication between people is a good thing.

Pappy

[Olivia920601]

Are u lookin for a serious relationship with bisexual women?

[kikigrace]

I'm new to the site, and have considered myself "straight" but have a bi husband who is at least 50% attracted to men. But I consider myself "open"...maybe if I met the right woman I would be attracted to her, or would enjoy and experience with her nevertheless. I'm trying to find a way to embrace, understand, and be included in my husbands WHOLE sexuality..I love him so much and find him the sexiest man alive (after 15 years) and frankly anything that is a turn on to him is to me also (I think). I know part of my attraction to him is his complex, different (from mine) sexuality, even though at times I have been very jealous. I'm trying to get over that because all it does is cause me/us pain. I felt a little upset when I saw this thread, because I thought at first I wasn't welcome, but everyone seems particularly nice and intelligent! This seems like a safe, friendly, informative community. My main question is- how do we figure out if a threesome or foursome or whatever is right for us. My husband will be lurking over my shoulder for sure...maybe he'll join independently. Although I don't think he has as many questions as I do, or as much of a need for some kind of support (besides mine) because he is so clear about his bi-sexuality, and experienced in it too. So, I hope I am welcome, and I appreciate any tolerance. I can't imagine I would ever make anyone feel uncomfortable or untolerated in anyway. If I ever did, it would be accidental, and would just like feedback that I had hurt someone's feelings inadvertently or something. Anyway, I'd love to read from bi-men and women, and hear any advice...hope that is ok. Of course I would try to stay on the threads that seemed more pertinent to my interest, so maybe one solution for someone who is bothered by the presence of "straight" women (or men) is to stay on threads, or create them, that would be more of interest solely to the people you are interested in hearing from? Maybe it doesn't work that way, like I said, I am new...

[iamgarbanzo]

I am happy to see as many women on the site as possible. A lot of sexually-oriented sites have a massive disproportion of women to men, and I don't want this to be another I always want to have the opportunity to benefit from a woman's perspective.

[elian]

I am glad that there are women on this site too! They might be curious about their own boyfriends/husbands, bisexual themselves or curious about bisexuality in general.

[charles-smythe]

I joined this site to meet other bisexual men and women but I see lots of posts by women who are straight and are not bisexual at all yet they decide to go here, hang out, and treat this site as though it's a social club.

What gives I thought this was a site for bisexuals? The site is bisexual.com and it's advertised as "The bisexual community site".…there is many reasons why they are here…trying to understand a bi husband/boyfriend…to name one…but the fact of the matter is we don’t discriminate…so it really doesn’t make damn why they’re here…they are welcome as far as I’m concerned & they can give a different prospective to different subjects….

[bi4asplay]

I joined this site to meet other bisexual men and women but I see lots of posts by women who are straight and are not bisexual at all yet they decide to go here, hang out, and treat this site as though it's a social club.

What gives I thought this was a site for bisexuals? The site is bisexual.com and it's advertised as "The bisexual community site".


Too many? How can that be? Never too many ladies !! Even better if they like to play with bi guys. Sure wish I could find one here.

[tenni]

If you read the OP you will notice the words "cooling off" under his name. drugstore cowboy was removed from the site. He was part of a troll network.

[sysper]

best answer!!!!!! (at least according to me......)
Too many? How can that be? Never too many ladies !! Even better if they like to play with bi guys. Sure wish I could find one here.