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bizel
Jan 29, 2011, 4:28 PM
was walking thru supermarket the other day, and saw a t-shirt i couldn't quite read. i asked the boy (with his mother) to stand still so i could read it. mother blustered and said it was disgusting, to ignore it and marched him off. i burst out laughing at her reaction, but little narked i didn't get closure. anyway got to thinking of my faves.

am swinging between 'save the whales, eat a japanese' or 'ALL I WANT IS WORLD PEACE....and a blowjob' (won't walk next to a bloke wearing that tho - lol).

anyone else have a fave or two??

and no, although i agree with the first one, this is not primarily a political statement - it's just fun!

Arthas
Jan 29, 2011, 5:52 PM
For bigger guys "This isn't stomach, this is fuel tank for a sex machine".

Can't think of anything else. But I've had a good page with plenty of T-shirts, can't remember now...

llllllllll
Jan 29, 2011, 6:23 PM
I have one that always gets a few laughs when I wear it..It says
"Support the fine arts.....Shoot a rapper"

Diva667
Jan 29, 2011, 6:26 PM
This one,
http://www.myteespot.com/images/Images_d/DSCF7787.jpg

For those of you who havent read / watched "The Princess Bride" what's wrong with you???

That's what this is from...

DuckiesDarling
Jan 29, 2011, 6:40 PM
Hmmm I have a few.

"I refuse to engage in a battle of wits with an unarmed person"
"I may be fat but you are ugly and I can diet"
"Vegetarian: Ancient Tribal slang for the Village Idiot who can't hunt, fish or ride"
"Freedom isn't Free, you have to pay attention"


There are tons more that I have seen and would love to have as well as those that are hilarious but I would never wear. Thanks to cafepress.com pretty much anything you can dream up can be put on a Tshirt, calendar, coffee cup etc for a price.

goldenfinger
Jan 29, 2011, 7:18 PM
From my own head

At least I'm right about one thing
She is always right

:bigrin:

Realist
Jan 29, 2011, 7:44 PM
I was at a car show today.

A huge guy, who must have weighed 400 pounds was wearing a t-shirt that stated: "I beat Anorexia!"

Years ago, I saw one that looked like it had a blurred outline of a face made out of make-up. You could clearly see the outline of lipstick, mascara, rouge, eye shadow, and powder. Below the splattered make-up were the words: "I ran into Tammy Faye at the mall, today!"

(For those who don't know who Tammy Faye Bakker was, she was the wife of an American televangelist, Jim Bakker. She must have applied her make up by the buckets full....it certainly looked like it! He, or they, were convicted for embezzling the churches money. They made millions taking money from folks, some who could barely afford it, and squandering it on extravagant personal things for themselves. ).

BareHunter45
Jan 29, 2011, 10:27 PM
I have several:

One that has a picture of a coin on it and says: "Heads I get tail, tails I get head"

The other has a picture of a forest and says: "Morningwood Paper Co."

roadtriper58
Jan 30, 2011, 1:14 PM
I saw one at the mall on a guy. Laughed all the way home. It read,
"A THOUSAND POTENCIAL CHILDREN OF MINE DIED ON YOUR DAUGHTERS FACE"

bigbadmax
Jan 30, 2011, 1:42 PM
We have a seriel killer who was a gp(md) named harold shipman
Just after he was caught the tshirt slogan was "carry on doctor" after the classic british comedy films.

After the challenger disaster"Need Another Seven Astronauts" Ouch!

goldenfinger
Feb 25, 2011, 9:45 PM
Was driving along the highway when a small car overtook me, it had a sign on the back which read,,,,"My wife always says I don't listen when she speaks, or something like that". Yesterday, a guy in the pub had a tshirt which also read,,
"My wife wife says I never listen when she speaks, or
at least that is what I think she said". Must be a new one.

I'll start to listen, when she start to think.

A biker had on the back of his tshirt,,,"If you can read this, the shit fell off":bigrin:

bizel
Feb 25, 2011, 11:21 PM
Was driving along the highway when a small car overtook me, it had a sign on the back which read,,,,"My wife always says I don't listen when she speaks, or something like that". Yesterday, a guy in the pub had a tshirt which also read,,
"My wife wife says I never listen when she speaks, or
at least that is what I think she said". Must be a new one.

I'll start to listen, when she start to think.

A biker had on the back of his tshirt,,,"If you can read this, the shit fell off":bigrin:

have to laugh. saw a mud-covered 4wd that had 'i wish my wife was this dirty' written through the dirt on the back window.

Dead Account
Feb 25, 2011, 11:27 PM
1. Seen on the back of a bikers T-Shirt- "If you can read this, the bitch fell off" _oops, saw that one was taken.

and

2. At a bikers rally, a large fat biker standing next to his wife.
Wifes shirt says:

"I ride a fat boy"...

Man's shirt says:

"Im the fat boy"...:bigrin:

And one I like:

"I thought I was wrong once, but I was mistaken"

My all time favorite was from years ago, it said
"I gave up drinking, smoking and sex, it was the most horrifying 20 minutes of my life"

NotLostJustWandering
Feb 26, 2011, 5:18 AM
I have a T-shirt idea I'm trying to get an artist friend of mine to make for me.

Picture: a Palestinian and an Orthodox Jew sharing a bong and laughing.

Slogan: "Why can't we all just get a bong?"


And then, of course, there's my tagline below. Would gladly wear that on a T-shirt, too.

sammie19
Feb 26, 2011, 6:54 AM
I have tshirts with numerous slogans


"Touch without permission and sacrifice your hand"

"Mine not yours hands off"

"No grubby paw marks"

"Girl available apply within"

"I'm more expensive than you can possibly afford"

"Over 40? Don't bother"

"My twiddly bits are my twiddly bits. Touch and I will prosecute"

"I dont sleep with anyone"

lizard-lix
Feb 26, 2011, 8:53 AM
"Save a horse, ride a cowboy" (both a T and a song by Big N Rich)

"Your village called, their idiot is missing"

"Protons have mass? I didn't know they were Catholic"

As mentioned above, "I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person" is my all time fav...

Liz

FuzzloverUK
Feb 26, 2011, 9:22 AM
All of Sammie's are fine and dandy except the antepenultimate one. :bigrin:

welickit
Feb 26, 2011, 9:53 AM
Seen on a little kid at the fair:

I am here because my mom doesn't swallow.

darkeyes
Feb 26, 2011, 10:52 AM
I have tshirts with numerous slogans


"Touch without permission and sacrifice your hand"

"Mine not yours hands off"

"No grubby paw marks"

"Girl available apply within"

"I'm more expensive than you can possibly afford"

"Over 40? Don't bother"

"My twiddly bits are my twiddly bits. Touch and I will prosecute"

"I dont sleep with anyone"

Well Sam.. thats the unrude 1's taken care of.. wot 'bout the mucky 1's?:bigrin:

The Mrs Slocum 1 is gud.. "I love my pussy".. an have always found the "Pussy on the loose" fun.. very tacky.. but fun!:tong:;) But best of all I adore the "I do not fuck! I shag beautifully!!".. filthy cow!:bigrin:

sammie19
Feb 26, 2011, 11:54 AM
Maybe its time to make up a new one and give it to you.

"Tart with a big gob!" I think that fits very nicely. ;)

Much luv.

Michael623
Feb 26, 2011, 11:58 AM
I have snatched a lot of kisses
and vice versa

Billys_gurl
Feb 26, 2011, 5:11 PM
I found one on a website for big girls:
thicker than a Snickers

My husbands camo shirt:
I like this shirt... it hides the dirt

cowtowncpl4third
Feb 26, 2011, 6:54 PM
Our favorite:

Championship mustache rides 25 Cents

:cowboy::wendyico:

binectar
Feb 26, 2011, 6:55 PM
I have one that always gets a few laughs when I wear it..It says
"Support the fine arts.....Shoot a rapper"

Love that one!!! I have one that says:

"Every so often I wonder why that frisbee is getting bigger...and then it hits me!"

raistkit
Feb 26, 2011, 8:02 PM
my personal fav:

yea though i walk through
the valley of the shadow
of death i shall fear no evil
for i am the meanest
bastard in the valley

kit

Hephaestion
Feb 26, 2011, 8:18 PM
I have one that always gets a few laughs when I wear it..It says
"Support the fine arts.....Shoot a rapper"

Seconded

roy m cox
Feb 27, 2011, 12:29 AM
oh i saw a very "wrong" t shirt in target one day when my dad and i was shopping and i had to take a photo of it with my cell ph , and i even got one of the employees to take a very good look at it , now mind you it was for basket ball but i felt it was so wrong for a little boys t shirt , kiss the rim, my dad even got mad and wanted to see a store manager the who just about feel backwards when he saw what it sad and told the employee take them all down,

tho for an adult t shirt i would like it :bigrin:

DuckiesDarling
Feb 27, 2011, 12:38 AM
oh i saw a very "wrong" t shirt in target one day when my dad and i was shopping and i had to take a photo of it with my cell ph , and i even got one of the employees to take a very good look at it , now mind you it was for basket ball but i felt it was so wrong for a little boys t shirt , kiss the rim, my dad even got mad and wanted to see a store manager the who just about feel backwards when he saw what it sad and told the employee take them all down,

tho for an adult t shirt i would like it :bigrin:

Sorry, doesn't seem that wrong to me when you take it context that it had to do with basketball. But basically anything in life can take a perverted turn if you look at it long enough. :2cents:

codybear3
Feb 27, 2011, 1:32 AM
I had a light-ish blue tee-shirt with the medical emblem on it with the words,
ORGASM DONOR right below it... You could tell who read it as I went buy...

Others I have owned and seen....

SOME PEOPLE SAY I HAVE A BAD ATTITUDE. I SAY SCREW THEM!

DON'T SQUEEZE ME. I'M FULL OF GAS.

I'M NOT TRYING TO BE DIFFICULT, IT COME NATURALLY.

I AM NOT TOTALLY WORTHLESS... I CAN ALWAYS SERVE AS A BAD EXAMPLE.

BAD DECISIONS NOW MAKE GOOD STORIES LATER.

BE THE KIND OF MAN THAT WHEN YOUR FEET HIT THE FLOOR EACH MORNING THE DEVIL SAYS, "OH SHIT, HE'S UP!"

YOU CAN'T SPELL AWESOME WITHOUT "ME" IN IT...

I DON'T MIND GOING TO WORK. IT'S THAT 8 HOUR WAIT TO GO
HOME THAT REALLY SUCKS.

One for the work place...
IF IDIOTS GREW ON TREES, THIS PLACE WOULD BE FOREST.

I MARRIED A NUN. NUN IN THE MORNING AND NUN AT NIGHT.

I'D AGREE WITH YOU, BUT THEN WE'D BOTH BE WRONG.

FOR MY NEXT TRICK, I WILL NEED A CONDOM AND A VOLUNTEER.

Hope you all enjoy.... :paw::paw:

codybear3
Feb 27, 2011, 1:35 AM
This one,
http://www.myteespot.com/images/Images_d/DSCF7787.jpg

For those of you who havent read / watched "The Princess Bride" what's wrong with you???

That's what this is from...

LOL. And I do believe they did have fun storming the castle. :bigrin::paw::paw:

Dorian Earnest
Feb 27, 2011, 11:44 AM
Mine isn't a favorite T-shirt slogan -- rather a favorite t-shirt story.

When I was in high school one of my best friends, who was about 5'2" had "bodacious ta-tas" -- they were not quite Dolly, but they weren't too far off. She delighted in calling attention to them and one way she liked to do this was to wear tight t-shirts with very suggestive sayings. One said, "Jail Bait" another said, "Looking is free but touching will cost you." Another had two strategically placed fried eggs with the saying, "Sunny Side up, thanks."

In contrast, I was probably the most flat-chested girl in school. To make matters worse, I was nearly 6 feet tall. So when she and I were together I felt very self-conscious and awkward. I was used to boys staring at her and sometimes used to laugh at how stupid they would act. I knew that no boys could possibly even look twice at me when she was around, so I felt comfortable just being a "fly on the wall" and watching the spectacle of idiot adolescent boys behavior.

One day, we went to McDonalds and placed our order with the cutest boy at the counter (Of course! Duh!). He read her T-shirt (I think it was looking is free -- but I really don't remember) and he smiled and then he turned to me and read mine and got an even bigger smile. He winked at me and said, "I like your t-shirt."

I didn't remember anything noteworthy about my T-shirt. It had seemed pretty plain -- I had gotten it free in a supermarket promotion. It was bright red and had a bag of M & Ms on it. I looked at it and then blankly up at him. "Why?"

He smiled and said, "Melts in your mouth, not in your hand, huh?"

My face matched my shirt and I never wore it in public again. LOL! Oh the trauma of adolescence!

zman64
Feb 27, 2011, 8:12 PM
a close friend of mine, a biker-type got sick of always seeing the biker's wearing t-shirts that said "SHOW ME YOUR TITS"...so he said he wanted one that said ASK ME ABOUT MY DICK..so i had one made for him..he wore it every time he went riding his harley, especially if his wife was with him..lol.

bizel
Feb 28, 2011, 4:07 AM
a close friend of mine, a biker-type got sick of always seeing the biker's wearing t-shirts that said "SHOW ME YOUR TITS"...so he said he wanted one that said ASK ME ABOUT MY DICK..so i had one made for him..he wore it every time he went riding his harley, especially if his wife was with him..lol.

this reminds me of a banner i saw on the front of a ute 'my other toy has tits'. great for a bi girl to drive!

darkeyes
Feb 28, 2011, 5:03 AM
Kate and I went out shopping on Saturday.. we were having a little refresher and breather in Rose Street when a girl came in to the pub with a couple of guys. She took off her coat and sat down opposite Kate. There, emblazoned on her chest was one of my favourite phrases.. "Kiss My Arse".. underneath in smaller print were the words "He's the the big guy". We looked at the two guys with her and at the beefier of the two guys.. Kate turned to me and whispered "I may very well given the opportunity".:eek:

Very generous of the girl don't u think? Very caring of her boy friend's needs and wants...

"Blow Job"
Feb 28, 2011, 2:59 PM
Perhaps the best T-Shirt slogan that I ever saw was worn by a guy strolling hand and hand with his (I guess) wife and small child through a theme park many years ago. It read..

"I Choked Linda Lovelace"

phabulus
Mar 2, 2011, 9:23 PM
Mine is "Tell your tits to stop staring at my eyes!"

chook
Mar 2, 2011, 11:47 PM
Here in Australia we have a brand of cat food called Whiskers.....and yours truly found a t shirt that said "has your pussy had my whiskers today" another t shirt had DILLIGAF= DO I Look Like I Give A Fuck But my all time favourite is "To All You Virgins Thanks For Nothing" and another one I saw was The only thing Linda Lovelace hasnt gone down on is the Titanic.


Cheers Chook :bigrin:

still_shy
Mar 4, 2011, 9:18 AM
Ok...Most, if not all of these are offensive...no harm intended :)

~Stare at me in disgust if you want to blow me
~Relax, I'm hilarious
~Hopeless Romantic seeks Filthy Whore
~Ok, but wash it first
~Sorry about what happens later
~This orgy is off to a slow start
~I hope I don't black out cause this is awesome
~I'd rather be snorting cocaine off a hookers ass
~You could singlehandedly make my dreams come true...Or you could use two hands
And my personal favorite
~I'm here to kill you. Next time, keep the chain letter going.

curious married m
Mar 4, 2011, 10:09 AM
I had a favorite t-shirt in college. It had a 2 humped camel on it and said:

"Humpin to Please"

As a wee child many years earlier, I did not know that was the motto of Campbell trucking company. But I have vivid memories of those old trucks rolling down I-70.

darkeyes
Mar 4, 2011, 11:06 AM
I had a favorite t-shirt in college. It had a 2 humped camel on it and said:

"Humpin to Please"

As a wee child many years earlier, I did not know that was the motto of Campbell trucking company. But I have vivid memories of those old trucks rolling down I-70.

Knew u'd been tell us porkie pies boutya age me luffly old goat face..:bigrin:

Saw a girl at a crossing yesterday wiv a tshirt.. "No to cottage cheese"

Cudnt agree wiv 'er more... tee hee

void()
Mar 5, 2011, 12:28 AM
In the center of a four way arrow "Wearer has gone that way."

Bicuriousman
Mar 5, 2011, 10:13 AM
For men.. with arrow pointing down it says" free breathalyzer test blow here"
Seen a woman one time wearing one with a line across the chest and it had text saying "you must be this high to ride this ride" :bigrin:

welickit
Mar 5, 2011, 11:10 AM
Back of a man's shirt

BOMB SQUAD

If you see me running try to keep up!

Arthas
Mar 5, 2011, 2:05 PM
http://www.tshirthell.com/hell.shtml

Hundreads of designs, I posted this just to see them, I'm not trying to sell them.

sammie19
Mar 6, 2011, 6:31 AM
Guy at a party last night. "My cock is massive. You know you want it"

He went home having failed to score.:bigrin:

peterupright
Mar 6, 2011, 8:34 AM
Seen at the Mall recently on a 7 year old

Parents for sale
Buy one, get one free.

Hephaestion
Mar 7, 2011, 7:32 AM
From T-shirts with logos for sale in the back of Viz magazine a while back

1) Adedose (with logo in place of Adidas)

2) With an appropriate cartoon of man looking at his wife in 'doggy' with man's best friend

Dammit Doris You're just too nice to that dog.



From elsewhere and also as a bumper sticker.

It's a great day - watch some bastard spoil it

cutterjo
Mar 7, 2011, 12:54 PM
There are way to many great ones. This is currently one of my favs.

Diva667
Mar 7, 2011, 3:02 PM
I like this one

http://i949.photobucket.com/albums/ad331/2qtlawncare/Capture.jpg

Here is the site it came from http://www.teefury.com/archive/1084/Time_Warp/