Do you ever doubt your attraction to one gender?

[anytif]

I'm female for the record.
And I'm still sort of still finding myself orientation wise.

Anyway, well, I'll jump right into it. I definitely know I'm not straight, but I always kinda just assumed I'm into boys. But lately, I just don't have feelings for boys nearly at all, I mean I can identify a good looking guy and know they are attractive, but I kinda just don't feel sexual feelings towards males lately.
All my sexual feelings are for females.
I'm just confused as to whether this is just a bisexual phase of gender preference (does this even exist?) or I might just be gay...?
Do other people go through this?

[royalistusa]

Yes, I find that for me it is a daily thing. Somedays are different than others for me and I am always sorting myself out. The challange I find is to be open enough to be who you are in the moment.

I am primarily attracted to same gender types but for me love is a spiritual thing and so if I develop a special bond with an opposite gender person or a co gender person so be it.

Feel free to chat if you like.

Your Friend

[Realist]

All you should do is "know thyself" and be true to yourself.

As someone in another post put it, "My sexuality is fluid" ..........meaning that, they are not stuck on one path.

If I am attracted to a person of either gender and if we have mutual attractions, I can be romantically interested. Like a pendulum, in different times I have felt more inclined to be with a lady...or a gentleman.

My first wife was more like you, I think. She went all the way for one, then, later, she would swing back.

At one time, she felt she was completely gay and remained so for a long period. Then, when we met, she decided we were meant for each other. She did have a couple of female lovers during our marriage, but didn't feel the need to be exclusive with them.

After our divorce, she was with another girl for a long time. She has now remarried a fellow she's known for years.

Look within yourself.....the answer is inside YOU!

[fredtyg]

I've never doubted my sexual attractions. I may have denied them to myself early on, but never doubted them.

Once I'd admitted to myself I was at the very least bisexual, I still never doubted those feelings. They'd just shift over time. Sometimes I'd be more into guys, sometimes girls. Now I'm almost exclusively interested in men and have been for some time, although I'll have to admit that Russian spy gal, Anna Chapman, about knocked the queer out of me for a week or so.

[open2both]

Short answer... NO

[darkeyes]

I'm female for the record.
And I'm still sort of still finding myself orientation wise.

Anyway, well, I'll jump right into it. I definitely know I'm not straight, but I always kinda just assumed I'm into boys. But lately, I just don't have feelings for boys nearly at all, I mean I can identify a good looking guy and know they are attractive, but I kinda just don't feel sexual feelings towards males lately.
All my sexual feelings are for females.
I'm just confused as to whether this is just a bisexual phase of gender preference (does this even exist?) or I might just be gay...?
Do other people go through this?

It may be a phase hun.. there were times in my life I just panted after girls or guys... mostly it was and... but as time went on it increasigly became only my own gender.. from what u say it tells me u r gay.. but from afar I may be wrong.. but time will tell, as it has with me.. U will think and argue with yourself and u will deny much... but the day will come and u will know exactly who u are.. and when u do u will be so much the happier for it and much more at ease with yourself....

[void()]

"As someone in another post put it, "My sexuality is fluid" ..........meaning that, they are not stuck on one path. "

That noted, my wife has suggested I may be more sexually receptive with men. I can see her point sometimes, other times I can't. So ... yeah, fluidity pretty sums it up for me. :)

[moonlitwish]

I'm one of those girls who likes girls, but I fell for a dude once. Still love him to death and he's one of my best friends, but my 'pendulum' as someone else said, swung, and sexually, we just did not fit anymore. Every once in a blue moon, I'll fancy a guy, but mostly, it's just a phase for me. Something attuned to the tide, I'll bet. As you become more comfortable with yourself, I'm sure you'll notice yourself falling in and out of patterns just as I have. But know that that damn thing called love will prevail over anything else.

[loopfruits]

My attraction definitely shifts from time to time. I think it's normal.

[jem_is_bi]

No, I have always been attracted to both genders.
I have always been more sexually attracted to males but more sexually excited by females. Females are just so beautiful and wonderfully different from men. Men have what I need for fullfillment.

[ErosUrge]

As has been pointed out already, I have had doubts about my interests sexually in the same gender years ago. And even now, I sometimes wonder if things would be less complicated for me if I wasn't attracted to both genders. Yet all in all, I know that I cannot deny my appetite for both. Though I love and adore women and experience a whole spectrum and range of emotions with them, I have at the same time loved the intensity and experiences of sex with men. Though only sexual, it is something that has always been with me. To exclude one over the other would certainly be a detriment to my well being. This is something that sometimes takes some real soul searching. I wish you well.

[phooey]

i've always fancied women, but every now and again i meet a guy who really does it for me....and then sometimes i go "off" guys altogether for a while

[bibottom30064]

I have been married for 47 years. Over time I have been with many men and women. Now I find the only woman who interests my is my wife. My interest in a variety of men continues .
:flag2:

[the sacred night]

I used to have these same doubts, until I got used to the cycles I go through and found that many others have similar periods of interest only in one gender for awhile, then another for awhile.

[jackbirdjay]

Yes I did in high school. I was attracted to guys in the gym showers. But I wanted girls to. I was a virgin till I was 17, she showed me how. After about 2 years of sex with her, I still was attracted to guys even that we had lots of hot sex. I was now 19 and we broke up. At 20 dated a girl on and off, it was just the sex. In my mid 20's started going to the adult movie theaters and adult drive-ins. Found my attraction to guys getting stronger. My eyes opened up a lot at the adult movies. I see guys having sex. Finely it happen I sucked my first guy that I wanted to do for so long. With me, I love women but am mostly attracted to guys just for the sex. So I came to terms that I am more attracted to women Just need sex from guys.

[Besos para ella]

I'm female for the record.
And I'm still sort of still finding myself orientation wise.

Anyway, well, I'll jump right into it. I definitely know I'm not straight, but I always kinda just assumed I'm into boys. But lately, I just don't have feelings for boys nearly at all, I mean I can identify a good looking guy and know they are attractive, but I kinda just don't feel sexual feelings towards males lately.
All my sexual feelings are for females.
I'm just confused as to whether this is just a bisexual phase of gender preference (does this even exist?) or I might just be gay...?
Do other people go through this?

I feel EXACTLY the same... and it's driving me crazy!!!! I can identify a hot guy and thats great but alllll my sexual feelings are for females and have been for a while now.... I have no idea what this means but i'm just kinda going with it and yes... it is veryyyy confusing!

[darkeyes]

Ellie and Anytif..I can identify with where u are at.. I too went through the wanting only girls phase.. I was in my mid 20s by then and over time, probably partly due to an unstisfactory marriage but more to do with me and what I am I lost interest sexually in men and in have never had a guy since my marriage broke up. I still had residual feelings for them and their bits but by the time I was about 27, I had no feelings whatever sexually for guys. Like u I can still look at and identify a hot guy.. but then I know what a beautiful dog looks like too, and I dont fancy them in the least for fucking. Thats an analogy guys.. its not meant as an insult.. so no mysandry comments huh?

I accept myself as lesbian but that doesnt mean u are inevitably are or are going to be a lesbian and I understand your confusion. I know several bi girls who have gone through the stage of not being attracted to men but sexuality can fluctuate in some of us, maybe even most, and the dirty cows are now back in the swing of things with guys having their "fun". One is in fact happily married and has given we poor Goddesses up.. for now.. tee hee. One up for the lesser mortal:( O woe is us...:tong:

We are human beings and we do chop and change how we feel about many things.. for some it is an inexorable journey to where I am today.. I dont envisage any change in my sexuality, for others it is quite different. All I can say is take life as it finds you, and as you are when you wake up each and every day.. angst does often confuse the issue and prevent us from seeing clearly what we are and how we feel about many things.. kismet my darlings.. it will get you in the end.. you will both get there and whatever you are or will become.. most of all accept it once you know and dont stress about it.. you will know all the sooner... and most of all.. enjoy it, take it in open arms whatever it is and be happy..:)

[wrbi01]

I have been going through something similar lately. I came out this past November to my wife and a few very close friends. All were accepting... I have been having dreams of being with a man. More than I ever had before. Then my wife and I were having sex and I was worried that I wouldnt perform well for her. I used a prostate massager while we were in "action" and I got off but it was more because of the toy. Im thinking its just a phase Im going through because I still find women VERY attractive... but right now.. I all up for a guy :)

[justcurious4me]

I had a friend that, a couple of months ago, started to identify that she was bisexual. She had met a girl in the UK a while back that she was friends with that she flat out fell head-over-heels for... When she talked to my wife and I about it she had summed up her view on bisexual gender preference very nicely... She said, "Love is love. If you love the person, it doesn't really matter what sex they are... So, why would I limit myself to just one sex. That only limits me to half the chance of finding my soulmate."

Honestly, I think that her train of thought describes, beautifully I might add, the thoughts of attraction to both sexes on the personal level... So, when I discovered my true orientation and what I felt, I've kind of taken those words to heart...

I haven't talked to her in some time, we had a falling out between friends, but wherever she is, I hope that her and her girlfriend are doing well...

[Besos para ella]

I had a friend that, a couple of months ago, started to identify that she was bisexual. She had met a girl in the UK a while back that she was friends with that she flat out fell head-over-heels for... When she talked to my wife and I about it she had summed up her view on bisexual gender preference very nicely... She said, "Love is love. If you love the person, it doesn't really matter what sex they are... So, why would I limit myself to just one sex. That only limits me to half the chance of finding my soulmate."

Honestly, I think that her train of thought describes, beautifully I might add, the thoughts of attraction to both sexes on the personal level... So, when I discovered my true orientation and what I felt, I've kind of taken those words to heart...

I haven't talked to her in some time, we had a falling out between friends, but wherever she is, I hope that her and her girlfriend are doing well...

I love that :) the quote that your friend said is perfect and is definitely something that I really believe :) Thanks for sharing :)

Oh....and Fran... You're just amazing :) xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

[Arthas]

I always doubt myself. Probably ever will.

Most of the people drink so they can stand other people. I drink so other people could stand me.

Guys aren't so picky, so I don't have to be attractive to them. Girls on the other hand more-less are. But I overcame that by being high/drunk. Around 7 out of 10 times I go out to get drunk I get laid. :cool:

[roy m cox]

Nope.

I'm bisexual, not gay or straight.

have to say the same i like both not one or the other,, both and both at the same time if i can hehe :bigrin:

:male:+:male:+:female:= yummy

:female:+:female:+:male:= yummy

:male:+:male:+:male:= yummy

:female:+:female:+:female:= yummy and me some wear in the middle :bigrin: