Mixed feelings

[jimmyhopkins09]

Hey everyone, i need some advice again. Still single, by the way, lol

I have a bit of a problem with my sexual urges, see i know i'm bisexual, i mean i think about sex with women and i think about sex with men, so i know i'm bi, i mean my biggest fantasy, is to have a fit bird riding my dick, while another guy is sliding his dick up my ass from behind. Graphic i know.

The thing is, i'm only interested in dating girls, but while i think about sex with chicks, i find myself thinking about sex with guys more, and that's ok at the time, coz i know i'll want sex with both.

But what bothers me is, i'm getting more frustrated, because i have been refraining from masturbating from my thoughts and fantasies for weeks, because every time i do, once i'm finished my feelings change, it's like i feel disgusted with myself for wanting to sleep with guys, i suddenly become certain it will never happen, and i sometimes feel like crying coz it's so confusing, especially as less than 30 minutes later and it's gone, and i'm up for sleeping with both again.

Can anyone tell me why i get these annoying spells, coz they confuse the hell out of me? Help me please?

[slipnslide]

Could it be simply that dating women is the predefined norm that people expect you to follow and dating a guy would be revealing yourself for who you really are and this scares you?

Take a deep breath and tell us more. Would you date guys? What's stopping you if not, etc.?

Remember, you're fine. There's nothing weird or wrong with you. You'll get through this point in your life.

[fredtyg]

I don't know how old you are, but when I was in my 20s, I'd nearly always feel guilty after having sex with men. At least by the next day after I'd sobered up.

Same thing with jacking off. Most guys lose libido after they jack, at least for a while. I'd usually feel a bit guilty about jacking off thinking about guys, too, after I'd achieve orgasm. I don't think it's unusual.

I think as I got older and accepted and embraced my bi/homosexuality more, that's when the guilt pretty much went away for me.

[welickit]

You say you know you are bisexual. We both seriously doubt it. What you are is confused and there is nothing wrong with that. Live your fantasy for now. Eventually your feelings will sort themselves out and you will either pursue a bisexual relationship or turn in another direction.

[rds0108]

Are you in your late teens/early 20s? Because you sound a lot like me then. I went through hell for a few years feeling guilty about my attraction to men and wishing desperately to be "normal." Finally I said to hell with it, realized there was nothing wrong with me and just opened myself to my feelings. And when I got comfortable enough with myself to be honest about being bi with others, I found out that not only were the majority of my friends and family completely supportive, but a number of friends came out to me too!

Now, I was a theater guy with like-minded friends and a very liberal immediate family, so your mileage may vary. But just remember that you're not alone, there's nothing wrong with you for being unsure of yourself, and there ARE people in your life who will support you, when and if you decide to act on these feelings and acknowledge them to those around you. Most of all, though, don't feel pressure to do anything you're not ready for, whether it's sexual exploration or coming out. The discovery of sexual identity is a very personal journey, and although advice is good, no one but you can tell you the "right way" to go about it.