Bi-Visibility PSA Campaign Good or Bad or?

[tenni]

What are you thoughts on this release of information and the campaign?

"Chicago, IL , September 3, 2010—Bi Social Network is proud to announce our year long Bi-Visibility PSA Campaign, to promote positive role models of bisexuals in opposite and same-sex partnerships and individual lives throughout the spectrum of our demographics. Bi Social Network and our allies will expose biphobia and intolerance in the straight, gay, lesbian and other communities who see “coming out bisexual’ as a crime, a joke, not real or screaming for attention.
The bisexual community has seen, particularly in the last several years a growing use of hate language within our own communities—from online web communities, to local businesses, to public celebrities, community activist and national platforms. We have equally seen a bi-erasure effect in major LGBT publications, in film, politics and celebrities who have gone back into the bisexual closet for fear of being “needy, greedy and liars with their peers.
Goals and Phases
This campaign will exposure, uplift, enrage, empower and affect millions of bisexuals and our allies that want to stand up and be apart of a great BLGT community. We are in fact on a strong mission to make known biphobia and bi-erasure with stories, words, discussions, radio podcasts, news, interviews, images and imagination.
Phase 1: We will start with several phases throughout the year. The first phase will be using imagery in the form of photography.
Phase 2: We will move into the social media on our show Bi Talk Radio, Facebook, Twitter and mobile podcasting throughout this process.
Phase 3: We will move into learning about each other lives, by way of news and interviews via printed media.
Phase 4: We will move into the media of motion storytelling. Personal stories of bisexuals throughout the nation; locally, nationally and internationally with video.
This movement is for the famous and for the non famous. For the young and for the old; for the locally bisexual and for others who are far way. There are no limits to this campaign. Your passion to tell your story is all your need.
To learn more, please contact us if you want to participate, educate, sponsor or interview us.

[FredinSJ]

Hey Tenni,
Why not?
GBLT have done it.
Blacks & Hispanics & Asian minorities pulled it off.
......... so why not the people who subscribe to legal adult swinger incest?

.............Here's the new version.......

"Chicago, IL , September 4, 2010—Bi SWINGER FAMILY Social Network is proud to announce our year long Bi-Visibility PSA Campaign, to promote positive role models of COUSINS, UNCLES, NIECES, bisexuals in opposite and same-sex partnerships and individual lives throughout the spectrum of our demographics. *** We have seen a bi-erasure effect in major LGBT publications, in film, politics and celebrities who have gone back into the bisexual closet for fear of being “needy, greedy and liars with their peers."
------------------end quote-----------------------

There will always be activism for the "next minority" to improve their rights. And the above is perfectly legal, used with maturity, judgment and all adults at "A family visit to the local swingers beach." See www.gsa.com or www.GeneticSexualAttraction.com.


-FredInSJ

[tenni]

Uh...Fred
Is this an apples and oranges thing? Maybe a separate thread for your post might be better than ignoring the points and issues in the OP?

I'm not sure what age groups that you are referring to either.

Rule 3. Sexual freedom is what it's all about, but even it should have limits - discussions of non-consensual sex, violence and sex, or sex involving children are not welcome here, will be promptly deleted, and the poster may be banned.

[IanBorthwick]

I've been in favor of it since long long ago. It's become a major issue now, and I have written several responses to the Bi Social Network over becoming more visible in the past under my real name. So more power to us. It may bring a lot of negativity, but as someone said there is no such thing as BAD advertising. Right now we need to make the world polarize and wake up about our issues.

[mikey3000]

I think it's a very good thing.

[Long Duck Dong]

hate speech within our own community is a real serious issue......

the growing trend of blame the * breeders * and calls of bi phobia / homophobia is something I have noticed a lot......but another aspect is also the way that some of the bi community are starting to turn on marriage and relationship partners as well and calling them intolerant and selfish .....

as bisexuals we are still fighting the bad image that the word bisexual brings up.... unfortunately we are feeling that its part of our rights.......and that as bisexuals we are entitled to have open relationships regard of our partners stance and if our partner disagrees, its selfish and biased on their part......
yet there is many open relationships with supportive partners that work so bloody well.....

in a sense we are trying to project a positive and balanced image of bisexuals while there are those of us, that enforce the bad image by our own behievour........

while I think the campaign is a good idea and welcome.... we can not sugar coat the issues or try and water down some very real problems in the bisexual community..... and that is the behievour of some of our own and while we may put up cookie cutter positive images, most people will judge the ones they see and interact with......

[IanBorthwick]

hate speech within our own community is a real serious issue......

the growing trend of blame the * breeders * and calls of bi phobia / homophobia is something I have noticed a lot......but another aspect is also the way that some of the bi community are starting to turn on marriage and relationship partners as well and calling them intolerant and selfish .....

as bisexuals we are still fighting the bad image that the word bisexual brings up.... unfortunately we are feeling that its part of our rights.......and that as bisexuals we are entitled to have open relationships regard of our partners stance and if our partner disagrees, its selfish and biased on their part......
yet there is many open relationships with supportive partners that work so bloody well.....

in a sense we are trying to project a positive and balanced image of bisexuals while there are those of us, that enforce the bad image by our own behievour........

while I think the campaign is a good idea and welcome.... we can not sugar coat the issues or try and water down some very real problems in the bisexual community..... and that is the behievour of some of our own and while we may put up cookie cutter positive images, most people will judge the ones they see and interact with......

And that is the biggest issue in the Bi Community, BAR NONE. It's one thing I've been harping on for years at Pride and on other forums about Bi-Visibility. We're our own worst enemy, and not all of it stems from stereotyping stigma we hold up against ourselves. Quite a bit of it comes from how we are so fractious and don't think other bisexuals who are different than ourselves deserve the same accord as ourselves. It's rather like, and please don't jump on me about the parallel, Gay Bears attacking the Cross-dressers, while the Flamers all argue who is the correct role model for gay boys coming out today. And I am NOT saying they are, just making a point as to what it looks like, not saying they do it...heck, they could be for all I know, but I don't. The point is that's what we're doing to ourselves.

It's a fact, we in-fight like cats and dogs tied in a bag and beaten with a board until we are snapping at each others throats. Why? All in the name of confusion as to what makes a "Good Bisexual".

One thing that must come before ALL of the rest, and that's solidarity. Those who say they are Bisexual, no matter how they want to label it, need to feel that they belong under the label itself and not try to scoot away from it due to the very real shame they are made to feel of that label. We need to rip down the stigma, put away the elitism, get behind the label and OWN it rather than letting it own us instead. We need to be proud to be Bi in all it's various hues and get moving together as one.

And here's a hint, we're all Good Bisexuals so long as we break no laws, hurt no one, and love first rather than hate. First harm none, an none shall harm you, then let love be your law...love guided by will.

[tenni]

"This campaign will exposure, uplift, enrage, empower and affect millions of bisexuals "

I do not necessarily see it as a goal of this campaign to "present a good image or balanced image" of bisexuals while others damage the reputation of bisexuals.

No one should get to determine what is a good image or a bad image.

Will it be the mainstream that gets to determine this?

Will it be gays?

Will it be bisexuals basically living a hetero lifestyle?

Those bisexuals in a mixed orientation lifestyle?

Will it be the bisexuals in poly lifestyles?

The campaign may enrage some bisexuals is part of one of the goals.

It will empower bisexuals.

I would think that all forms and lifestyles of bisexuality would be promoted rather than judging which bisexual lifestyles are the "good images". Perhaps it will create dialogue not just for the mainstream acceptance but for bisexuals themselves. It mentions the destructive elements within bisexual communities.(if there is such a thing) and even "hate" might apply when a bisexual determines that some are "good" bisexuals while other are "bad" image bisexuals. Might it be self hatred to deny all bisexual lifestyles? You do not have to live that lifestyle but do not decide that one is good and the other is bad.

Ian, although I get your main point.....people do get hurt. Some are hurt by the truth when it is revealed. That doesn't mean that the truth and fact that bisexuals are in society and should feel comfortable to be themselves if it might hurt someone else to know that. If a hetero or gay is hurt by that..so be it.

This bi erasure is an interesting term that I've not heard of before.

"Bisexual erasure is the tendency to ignore, remove, falsify, or re explain evidence of bisexuality in history, academia, the news media, and other primary sources.
In its most extreme form, bisexual erasure can include denying that bisexuality exists."

[IanBorthwick]

Tenni, you misunderstand. What i am saying is that this campaign will only work when we stop bickering within the community itself. Ia m not commenting on the campaign so much as seconding what LDD was saying also. We're dealign with people attacking from within and that will limit how effective this campaign is because we'll be attacking each other ripping apart the look we're trying to put forth.

[tenni]

I partially agree with you but am pointing out that I find LDD comment an attack on bisexuals that he deems as "bad image" bisexuals. I see his comments as attacking from within and wanting to be the determiner as to what is good and bad. If bisexuality is a wide range of sexual preferences and lifestyles no one lifestyle is better than the other. I do not know for certain but this is also a discussion in the gay section of humanity. Similarly, there are images of heterosexuals that are a bad image for some other heterosexuals. I also wonder if they mean the GLBT "communities" when they write about hatred, attacks and bi erasure?

[Long Duck Dong]

a attack on bisexuals I view as bad ??????

and I suppose your opinion that hetero females and partners should not be seen in the site to be supportive of their partners.... is a good image

there is a difference between being respectful, understanding, considerate, tolerant etc..... in all sexualities, relationships and marriages.......

and when its bisexuals ( and other sexualities ) partners that are the ones dealing with infidelity, cheating, lies etc...... and they are getting so fucked off with the attitude of some bisexuals ( and other sexualities ).....and expressing it......
I suppose their opinion is a attack on bisexuals ( and other sexualities ) too

I do not determine who is right or wrong...... society does..... and you tenni, are the one that has sat in this site and slamming other bisexuals ( and other sexualities ) for not being supportive of people that lie to their partners and cheat on them......
and also told my hetero partner she should post less and not be so supportive of me in the forums as its a bad look to other bisexuals ( and other sexualities ) while we have bisexual ( and other sexualities ) coming in here looking for proof that hetero partners will support and love bisexuals ( and other sexualities )......

I am sorry that my views on respect for a partner, considerate, caring and compromise, are something you view as wrong..... but those views are shared by a number of people in society and the reason why I have such a loving and caring partner........ and you have a hand

[bisexual Bill]

I partially agree with you but am pointing out that I find LDD comment an attack on bisexuals that he deems as "bad image" bisexuals. I see his comments as attacking from within and wanting to be the determiner as to what is good and bad. If bisexuality is a wide range of sexual preferences and lifestyles no one lifestyle is better than the other. I do not know for certain but this is also a discussion in the gay section of humanity. Similarly, there are images of heterosexuals that are a bad image for some other heterosexuals. I also wonder if they mean the GLBT "communities" when they write about hatred, attacks and bi erasure?

I agree with you Tenni, it does seem like LDD likes to attack people who he thinks are not "good" bisexuals or who are into cheating or not being completely honest or monogamous with a partner.

LongDuck, you do not even like bisexual men.

Claiming lies about us like this:


I brought it up cos thats what most bi males do.... fuck and run......its actually true cos I used to watch it with my own eyes and most of the males I have met, wanted that.... plus in the forums a lot of the bi males state they are not interested in the person, just the sex.....

I'm sure there are more horrible lies that you think and have posted about bisexual men.

I can't be bothered to look for your other posts about this subject.

I find it all rather bigoted, sad, complacent, and hypocritical on your part.

It's not my fault you do not like your supposed sexuality or lack of sex/sexuality since you wrote in another thread about how you were born without a sex drive at all and are asexual, and you have lots of biphobia and dislike for bisexual men who are out having sex, enjoying themselves, loving themselves, and have no shame about their sexuality.

Who cares if someone wants casual, quick, or even anonymous sex with a stranger? I do not see anything wrong with this as long as it is between consensual adults and everyone is safe.

You do not seem to write or even notice gay men and straight people doing this and it's common among people of all genders and sexual orientations not just bisexual men.

Who cares if there are "bad" bisexuals? There are "bad" people of all sexual orientations and claiming that bisexuals who do not want to be monogamous or refuse to stay monogamous and people who may cheat on a partner does not make them a "bad" bisexual.

Some straight people do not understand how for some bisexuals being monogamous with one gender and one sexual partner is like being in a death trap or like cutting off one arm. You can live without one arm but you'd rather have both arms and you'd be a whole and complete person if you had sex with both genders.

Fortunately there are straight people who do understand that some bisexuals need sex, relationships, or some sort of outlet for being bisexual and being sexually attracted to both genders so they do allow their bisexual partner to take on other sexual partners, look at certain types of porn, or do other things to express their sexuality and not feel unhappy.

No this is not limited to bisexual men. There are bisexual women who feel this way about monogamous relationships and there are even gay men who feel this way about having a single sexual partner and being in a monogamous relationship.

There's nothing wrong with people in relationships doing any of this or with having an open and non-monogamous relationship.

Who are you to judge and say how this sort of behavior is somehow wrong, unacceptable, or "bad" just because you have issues with bisexual men and cheating or undefined non-monogamous relationships of any type?

I'm sure you'd have issues with so called "Don't ask don't tell" open relationships where one partner goes out and fucks whoever they want and their partner does not want to know about any of this, does not want to talk about any of it, and does not want to know anything about anyone else who their partner has sex with.

Or you would have issues with open relationships that get started because one partner cheats on the other one and then these relationships wind up working.

LongDuck who are you to pass judgment on other people and their relationships that work for them? What gives you the right to say "These people are 'bad' bisexuals because they need and want sex and/or relationships with both genders!" but "These people who are content with just one gender in a completely monogamous relationship are 'good' bisexuals!" just because I say so based on my skewed version of morals and values!

[IanBorthwick]

Ok, it's right about HERE that people leap in and start verbally pummeling each other for what they feel are comments implied or not, but perceived and accepted as wrong.

Let's try this again: Take 2!

All opponents to your original corners and let's begin this conversation again without stuffing WORDS into each others mouths and throwing implications as facts.

Now, the point is that, as I can see it and agree with it, Bisexuals are ruining their own image which makes this campaign harder to be successful. Though LDD says many, I seriously doubt many bisexuals do this, for the simple fact that we cannot judge the all by the visible. It's not logical. So I'll say that the as the adage is true, the squeaky wheel gets the grease, then so too does bad behavior get more notice than good. Lindsey Lohan anyone?

Now Tenni was unsure of what Bi-Erasure in the GLBT community was all about and for that I would refer you to the many many articles on Bi Social Network regarding it. It is rooted in pressing our "bad behavior" as being indicative of our lack of trustworthiness and when we are seen as exemplary, they absorb us as if we were Gay/lesbian and such. This is only one example, but both you and LDD are actually pretty close in what you're trying to say but do not see it.

Now, can we please NOT jump for the jugular and speak peacably about it?

Bisexual Bill, you DO understand the points I was making as your long post shows, but attacking LDD for what he is saying(Which by the way is holding up a Social Mirror from the world) is not really going to be all that helpful. LDD likes to take point and counterpoint. He knows there is no real simple way to accomplish things for our community because our perception is bad in public, bad in the GLBT community, and bad even to OURSELVES because we doggedly snarl, snap and bite at one another over differences of what is good and bad even within our own Bisexual Opinion Base.

Let's try this peacefully, ok? Please?

Resume the debate.

[dafydd]

I guess visibility is the key. Bisexual people are the ultimate 'passers'. They can pass as hetero in straight communities and gay in gay communities. Part of the problem with lesbian and gay visibility is that unlike minority ethnic groups, gay people can become absorbed into the mainstream and pass as straight e.g. it is not obvious at first sight if someone is lesbian or gay. Invisibility has the effect that the mainstream culture never really sees we exist, or that we have rights e.g. they are unaware that we could be their teachers, their doctors, their policemen/women, that we are entrenched and alive in their communities. I guess bisexuals can retain that anonymity even in gay communities when they hold hands with their lovers. If a bi man holds hands with a man he is considered gay, if a bi man holds hands with a woman he is considered straight. It's double cloak of invisibility.

d

[bisexual Bill]

Bisexual Bill, you DO understand the points I was making as your long post shows, but attacking LDD for what he is saying(Which by the way is holding up a Social Mirror from the world) is not really going to be all that helpful. LDD likes to take point and counterpoint. He knows there is no real simple way to accomplish things for our community because our perception is bad in public, bad in the GLBT community, and bad even to OURSELVES because we doggedly snarl, snap and bite at one another over differences of what is good and bad even within our own Bisexual Opinion Base.

Let's try this peacefully, ok? Please?

Resume the debate.

LongDuck does not hold up a social mirror and does not look at things from a point or counterpoint.

He attacks people who he thinks are cheating or who are cheating on their spouse, or doing things that he does not approve of.

I've seen him attack bisexual men who come out to their wives/partners after they discovered that they are bisexual and they had been unfaithful to the spouse yet they'd had safe sex.
What if these men had never ever told their wives or girlfriends that they were bisexual or were having sex with other people?

It's like he's saying: Group X (monogamous bisexuals) are "good". While group Y (non-monogamous bisexuals and cheaters) are "bad".

I'm not attacking LDD. I'm saying how it's rather silly and hypocritical of him to say how the people who he thinks are "bad" bisexuals, which are bisexual men for the most part do not deserve to be recognized as bisexual because in his opinion they are "bad" people for whatever reason he's arguing at the moment.

This is about bisexual visibility.

It's not about arguing about who makes a "good" bisexual based on Long Duck's opinions about complete voluntary or forced monogamy v.s. who he thinks is a "bad" bisexual because they happen to cheat, have cheated in the past, or are not able to be monogamous and are honest about this with their partner or spouse.

You can't and should not exclude one group of bisexuals just because you do not personally agree with them, agree with what they do sexually, or agree with what they do as consensual adults in private relationships that do not include you.

These people are bisexual and deserve to be accepted, included with, and celebrated as bisexuals as well.

They do not need to be attacked and say how they give all bisexuals a bad name, smeared with lies and stereotypes, or told that they bring on their own problems since all of this is all not necessarily true.

[IanBorthwick]

LongDuck does not hold up a social mirror and does not look at things from a point or counterpoint.

He attacks people who he thinks are cheating or who are cheating on their spouse, or doing things that he does not approve of.

I've seen him attack bisexual men who come out to their wives/partners after they discovered that they are bisexual and they had been unfaithful to the spouse yet they'd had safe sex.
What if these men had never ever told their wives or girlfriends that they were bisexual or were having sex with other people?

It's like he's saying: Group X (monogamous bisexuals) are "good". While group Y (non-monogamous bisexuals and cheaters) are "bad".

I'm not attacking LDD. I'm saying how it's rather silly and hypocritical of him to say how the people who he thinks are "bad" bisexuals, which are bisexual men for the most part do not deserve to be recognized as bisexual because in his opinion they are "bad" people for whatever reason he's arguing at the moment.

This is about bisexual visibility.

It's not about arguing about who makes a "good" bisexual based on Long Duck's opinions about complete voluntary or forced monogamy v.s. who he thinks is a "bad" bisexual because they happen to cheat, have cheated in the past, or are not able to be monogamous and are honest about this with their partner or spouse.

You can't and should not exclude one group of bisexuals just because you do not personally agree with them, agree with what they do sexually, or agree with what they do as consensual adults in private relationships that do not include you.

These people are bisexual and deserve to be accepted, included with, and celebrated as bisexuals as well.

They do not need to be attacked and say how they give all bisexuals a bad name, smeared with lies and stereotypes, or told that they bring on their own problems since all of this is all not necessarily true.

Ok, in this thread, show me where he has done this exactly.

[tenni]

I'd like to remind everyone that this thread is about the goals of Bi Visibility and not what LDD has attempted to divert the thread too. I must agree with Bill that this has happened multiple times by this self admitted mentally ill poster. His fixations are well documented and his self admittance needs to be paid more attention to. At times, he is a form of trolling really. The ignore button can work wonders as a reminder how to weigh a poster's posting style. Some important aspects may be reposted in a rebuttal by another poster. Or take them off block to read their thoughts and remember..oh ya he is someone that I don't want to know his thoughts too much.

What bisexuals are ...WE are!!! Do we need to be all visible about every detail of our sexuality though? Perhaps, yes?..not sure. Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could actually adhere to thoughts posted here about how open and accepting bisexuals seem to be? That was a trait of bisexuality that they will make more visible...lol

The only reality about bisexuality to make visible is that we are sexually attracted to both genders...male and female. It is not valid to state that all bisexuals are capable of having "love" emotions for both genders. The other probably constant to make visible is the awkward one...we express our sexual attraction to both genders in a wide and varying way. A third but not yet proven strongly enough is that sexuality may not be a constant from birth to death. That one is going to scare the ca ca out of the hetro and gay bigots....lol Is that what Bi Visibility will promote? Doubt it as there is probably insufficient evidence to firmly make the statement. I do hear the beginning of a public dialogue on this aspect of sexuality though in the media. The one time that I saw it on TV it was not associated with the term bisexuality but only women and it was referred to being connected to being gay.

Just as homosexuality has aspects that heteros found unacceptable and at one time placed people under psychiatric care for wanting sex or falling in love with the same sex; attitudes have evolved. There are still aspects that I personally do not wish to participate in as far as same sex activity but I again repeat, I will not declare someone as bad for bisexual images.

Ian
I did read some about bi erasure and I will have to go to the site to look more carefully. I found it understandable from what I already knew but I just had not read that term. In fact, I might go as far as bi erasure is attempted when we only want to present bisexuality in a "good" image that we believe will be accepted by the hetero and gay communities. Personally, I am unaffected to find out that famous person X was a historical figure who it is now known and being publicized as bisexual. It does dick all for my self esteem. I'd rather have my visibility connected to acceptance by others in my life.

I'm still not convinced that I need to be public about my sexuality or visible about how I live as a bisexual. I have gay friends and colleagues. I know nothing about the intimacy of their sexual acts that they enjoy. Couples break up or get together regardless of their sexuality of coupling or tripling. I am inclined to think that living a poly lifestyle has far more grounds to cover before poly relationships become mundane for any sexuality and in particular amongst bisexuals themselves.

[Long Duck Dong]

bisexual bill.... I have a question.... if society says things like I do, am I still wrong or is society all blind and attacking bisexuals......

why are we trying to present a image of bisexuals to society when they fully capable of deciding for themselves, what bisexuals are like.....

the answer would be, they do it based around what they see and percieve.... and if they were to look in the forum and see things like danreid..... what the fuck are they supposed to think........

when they look in the site and see a celibate / asexual natured, bisexual in a relationship with a hetero woman..... what are they meant to think

when they look in the forum and see tenni telling hetero females they should not have a voice in the site, what are they supposed to think.....

when they look in the site and see your statements, what are they supposed to think......

when they read threads about how monogamy is wrong and how restricting bisexuals is wrong, what are they supposed to think

and when they read about balanced and working open relationships and marriages, what are they supposed to think.....

cos there is so much contradiction within that range in this bloody forum.... yet our lives are not lived in the forum, they are lived out in the public eye and that is what society is seeing.....

while you and tenni can sit in the forum and attack me, while telling me I am attacking bisexuals that have a bad image...... I am simply gonna live my life according to my understanding of it......and the way it works for me.....

what others think, feel and who they wanna fuck, doesn't hurt me or affect my ability to love, respect and be loyal to my partner....as that is in my nature.......
so society is not really gonna see me or my actions or my relationship, as its low key......
and the same in the forum.... the only reason that I am so visible in the forum, is not cos of what I say... its the fact people react to it....

the same with bisexuals in the public eye.... society reacts to the danreids and others of the bisexual community.... and thats why bisexuals get a bad rep.... bisexuals get judged on the most visible elements....

btw, I have to ask.... what is a good bisexual...... can you please tell me what one is so the others can see and also learn what fits the criteria of a good bisexual....... as between you and tenni you have both decided what is a bad bisexual.... so I gather you both see yourselves as the leading experts on what good and bad bisexuals are

[Long Duck Dong]

What are you thoughts on this release of information and the campaign?

"Chicago, IL , September 3, 2010—Bi Social Network is proud to announce our year long Bi-Visibility PSA Campaign, to promote positive role models of bisexuals in opposite and same-sex partnerships and individual lives throughout the spectrum of our demographics.

promote positive role models...... even the very first post, indicates the image of bisexual that the group want society to see.......

who wants to bet, its restricted to open relationship and marriages that are balanced and working, poly relationships and marriage, people that only do safe sex.......

not a accurate and true cross section of bisexual society that covers the full bisexual range and good / bad aspects of bisexuals from the point of view of the bisexuals and their partners ( covering the hetero, bi, les, gay, poly, monogamous, open, asexual, intersex, trans, gender queer, queer undefined etc

they want positive role models so tenni and bill I put it to you, who are being judgement and biased..... me or the group that is wanting a good cookie cutter image of bisexuals that are positive role models

[IanBorthwick]

they want positive role models so tenni and bill I put it to you, who are being judgement and biased..... me or the group that is wanting a good cookie cutter image of bisexuals that are positive role models

They want only positive role Models? I do recall and I went back and reread it, that the "Positive Only" stuff was not anywhere to be seen. In fact the entire thrust of the thing is under the slogan,"I Am Visible." SO it's not restricted to that only.

I don't know why this is getting sidetracked into fighting, but I would strenuously recommend that the bickering stop because it's far and away counter-productive. This has nothing to do with Good and Bad, and once again as I said, the biggest problem IN our community is from WITHIN. You're all proving me right and that makes me a sad panda.

Can't you all see how what you want is wrapped up in the same paper? All you're doing is arguing what color that paper is. LDD, you're smart enough to know that this is what we're trying to get across. Help me?

Tenni, the issues you've brought here are getting lost in personal attacks based on the past arguments, through slights both real and perceived and that really is making this thread derail. Help me?

Bisexual Bill, what you are doing and arguing is really NOT conducive to making discussing this campaign WHICH IS THE PURPOSE OF THIS THREAD! Help me?

Come on, guys, this is not school and there is no real need to whip one another. Turn the other cheek, swallow some pride and actually discuss this properly! LDD may be abrasive but he's not telling a lie! He's been in this community a hell of a lot longer than I have and he's run into a lot of what we're trying to discuss. Wise men oft times have abrasive exteriors because they are A) Jaded B) Trying to keep you from running to them for all your life's ills and C) All of the above.

I personally don't care what the reason is, but if you please, get back ON topic! Seriously, LDD has not derailed this thread so don't blame him. His point is 100% valid.

[Long Duck Dong]

ian I am looking at it as society would...... things like we have positive role model prisoners that we hold as symbols to other prisoners and people not in prison as a example...... generally they will not use the prison trouble makers as a positive role model

I am disillusioned with a lot of * public image / role model * campaigns..... cos most of them have spin doctor type bs in the background......


use people like me, you, bill, tenni, danreid, DD, peg, annika L, marie delta, mikey 3000, fuck I can name about 100 more..... real bisexuals, real people, real issues, ..... and we cover more than the * bisexuals enjoy both genders / open or monogamous relationships and marriages * aspect of bisexuality

we cover dealing with more than just sex issues, we are dealing with social issues, gender identity issues, employment issues, mental health issues, sexuality issues etc etc..... issues that can affect all bisexuals.....

[IanBorthwick]

ian I am looking at it as society would...... things like we have positive role model prisoners that we hold as symbols to other prisoners and people not in prison as a example...... generally they will not use the prison trouble makers as a positive role model

I am disillusioned with a lot of * public image / role model * campaigns..... cos most of them have spin doctor type bs in the background......


use people like me, you, bill, tenni, danreid, DD, peg, annika L, marie delta, mikey 3000, fuck I can name about 100 more..... real bisexuals, real people, real issues, ..... and we cover more than the * bisexuals enjoy both genders / open or monogamous relationships and marriages * aspect of bisexuality

we cover dealing with more than just sex issues, we are dealing with social issues, gender identity issues, employment issues, mental health issues, sexuality issues etc etc..... issues that can affect all bisexuals.....

I know that LDD, but how you come across is rubbing people the wrong way. BELIEVE me, I do understand what you are doing., and what you are saying. I am trying to get a calmer response from the others because tensions are running a tad high. As I said, you're doing the point/counterpoint thing.

And as the campaign says, it's not about "Good Example/Bad Example", it's all about Example, only. Being visible, respected, known to exist, seen to be real, seen to be human, seen, seen seen. Seriously. And the point is that we must no tear it apart by MAKING it the goo/bad thing that we tend to do within this community. We're the ones who are really at our own throats more than anyone else. That gives outsiders the ability to keep us spinning our wheels.

[tenni]

[QUOTE=IanBorthwick;184743]They want only positive role Models? I do recall and I went back and reread it, that the "Positive Only" stuff was not anywhere to be seen. In fact the entire thrust of the thing is under the slogan,"I Am Visible." SO it's not restricted to that only.


Ian
What is the point that you find valid that comes from LDD?

I agree that the thrust of the campaign will be more than likely to focus on the concept that bisexuality exists. We will have to wait to see any of the campaign or further releases. What I find interesting is the belief that bisexuals want to be part of the GLBT group. Can a campaign not be done to raise the awareness and visibility of bisexuals within society without aligning ourselves with the GLBT group? Education for GL and heterosexuals can be done without being part of such a group. I know that one strong argument is numbers but not all of us want this.

If you do not see a pattern of constant derailment of thread topics towards his pet causes by the above mentioned poster...watch a bit more carefully.

[IanBorthwick]

[QUOTE=IanBorthwick;184743]They want only positive role Models? I do recall and I went back and reread it, that the "Positive Only" stuff was not anywhere to be seen. In fact the entire thrust of the thing is under the slogan,"I Am Visible." SO it's not restricted to that only.


Ian
What is the point that you find valid that comes from LDD?

I agree that the thrust of the campaign will be more than likely to focus on the concept that bisexuality exists. We will have to wait to see any of the campaign or further releases.

If you do not see a pattern of constant derailment of thread topics towards his pet causes by the above mentioned poster...watch a bit more carefully.

Ok, to sum up, LDD is saying that our image is being judged all the time by society. If we are to move forward we need to stop infighting on what makes us "Good Bisexuals" or as I want to term from here on in, as a Politically Correct Bisexual. The problem with this is the simple fact that our community is so diverse that we cannot allow ourselves to be pigeon-holed into saying there is such a thing. There isn't. And we must defy the attempt to put a "FACE" onto out community, which can be as bad as making a new stereotype that the GL and the Straight community have been shoving at us for decades.

Also, we are our own worst enemies in that regard also. We infight and attack from within, this forum is a classic example.

This is why I am very glad of the way the new program is going to work because it focuses on one thing and one thing only: Bi-Visibility.

S&Gshow, I am sorry to disabuse you. No, the very definition of Bi_erasure came from what the Gay and Lesbian community is doing. The term arose because it is they that are the primary culprits involved in this event. Not to mention that over half of the negative stereotyping on Bisexuals in the U.S. comes from our supposed allies. I entreat you to go to BiSocialNetwork.com and see the articles about it.

[tenni]

[QUOTE=IanBorthwick;184780][QUOTE=tenni;184779][I][COLOR="Red"]

Ok, to sum up, LDD is saying that our image is being judged all the time by society. If we are to move forward we need to stop infighting on what makes us "Good Bisexuals" or as I want to term from here on in, as a Politically Correct Bisexual. "

Ian
I do not see post #7 by LDD as supporting your above statement? I find the underlined section clearly indicating to me his bias and "this is the bad image" and this is a good image (his opinion of good). LDD introduced the classification of good and bad which is not the campaign as you have reminded him. "WE are who we are" as I wrote in a previous post. Diversity of bisexual lifestyles is what we are. All need to be visible. Fuck the public attitude...we are who we are. Be proud of our diversity of lifestyles. is how I see a visibility campaign ..but they won't go there just yet. I see a campaign of "we are bisexuals and may be sexually attracted to both genders". That is it. If we are not visible, the other sexualities can not have a bad image of us...other than we don't exist.

Post 7 by LDD
[I]"as bisexuals we are still fighting the bad image that the word bisexual brings up.... unfortunately we are feeling that its part of our rights.......and that as bisexuals we are entitled to have open relationships regard of our partners stance and if our partner disagrees, its selfish and biased on their part......
yet there is many open relationships with supportive partners that work so bloody well.....

in a sense we are trying to project a positive and balanced image of bisexuals while there are those of us, that enforce the bad image by our own behievour...."

As far as infighting, someone has to stand up to people like LDD who want us to be pidgeon holed into polite boxes that heteros will accept. Gawd knows about the G&L people? Discussion and debate is necesary imo. LDD is what he is. He is not a spokesperson etc. for bisexuals.

[Pasadenacpl2]

This thread, in and of itself, should show you why this campaign is doomed to failure.

You want to present a positive image of bisexuals? Well, that sounds like PR to me. And for PR to work, you have to know who your audience is. Since preaching to the choir is most likely not the point, your audience is: straight, middle class Americans.

Guess who, among the posters thus far in this thread, has come closest to understanding what straight, middle class Americans consider 'positive?' I'll give you a hint...it rhymes with kong.

Pasa

[bisexual Bill]

This thread, in and of itself, should show you why this campaign is doomed to failure.

You want to present a positive image of bisexuals? Well, that sounds like PR to me. And for PR to work, you have to know who your audience is. Since preaching to the choir is most likely not the point, your audience is: straight, middle class Americans.

Guess who, among the posters thus far in this thread, has come closest to understanding what straight, middle class Americans consider 'positive?' I'll give you a hint...it rhymes with kong.

Pasa

Who cares if Heterosexual middle class America accepts, or does not accept bisexuals?

I'm not going to lose any sleep, worry, or care if Hetero middle class America accepts me or not for my sexuality that is not heterosexual.

I stopped caring about what straight people thought about my sexuality long ago since it was not something I could hide or change.

My straight friends and family have always accepted me since they found out about my sexuality as a kid and teenager.

There was no way they were not going to accept me no matter what my sexuality is.

The only people who care or worry about white middle class Heterosexual American citizens understanding their sexuality that is not Hetero are closet case Republican Conservatives.

The point of this whole bisexual visibility campaign is not acceptance from straight middle class Americans, and conforming our bisexuality with a heterosexual lens to fit in with their Heterosexism and Heteronormativity to make them comfortable about bisexuality.

The point of this campaign is simply visibility and coming out as a bisexual person.

[Long Duck Dong]

[QUOTE=IanBorthwick;184780][QUOTE=tenni;184779][I][COLOR="Red"]

Ok, to sum up, LDD is saying that our image is being judged all the time by society. If we are to move forward we need to stop infighting on what makes us "Good Bisexuals" or as I want to term from here on in, as a Politically Correct Bisexual. "

Ian
I do not see post #7 by LDD as supporting your above statement? I find the underlined section clearly indicating to me his bias and "this is the bad image" and this is a good image (his opinion of good). LDD introduced the classification of good and bad which is not the campaign as you have reminded him. "WE are who we are" as I wrote in a previous post. Diversity of bisexual lifestyles is what we are. All need to be visible. Fuck the public attitude...we are who we are. Be proud of our diversity of lifestyles. is how I see a visibility campaign ..but they won't go there just yet. I see a campaign of "we are bisexuals and may be sexually attracted to both genders". That is it. If we are not visible, the other sexualities can not have a bad image of us...other than we don't exist.

Post 7 by LDD
[I]"as bisexuals we are still fighting the bad image that the word bisexual brings up.... unfortunately we are feeling that its part of our rights.......and that as bisexuals we are entitled to have open relationships regard of our partners stance and if our partner disagrees, its selfish and biased on their part......
yet there is many open relationships with supportive partners that work so bloody well.....

in a sense we are trying to project a positive and balanced image of bisexuals while there are those of us, that enforce the bad image by our own behievour...."

As far as infighting, someone has to stand up to people like LDD who want us to be pidgeon holed into polite boxes that heteros will accept. Gawd knows about the G&L people? Discussion and debate is necesary imo. LDD is what he is. He is not a spokesperson etc. for bisexuals.



yeah, I am wrong, I am labelling people as bad bisexual got it...... and when people come into the site and talk about how they are getting sick of being seen as unfaithful people or people that will screw anything that moves or are really closeted gays or heteros in denial or people that can not commit in relationships, its cos I am the person that they spoke to all around the world

I am society all around the world, I am every person that has the issue with bisexuals... I am in every country.............

got it..... loud and clear..... any bi phobic remarks around the world are my fault ...... I must be the one writing the articles against bis.....

damm I am good.... I am more omnipresent than god......

strangely enuf, I am not sure that people are gonna believe that I am that good..... so sure, keep blaming me..... but people worship god, and if I am on the level of god... tenni ... please worship me..... or deny me.... and admit that society is the one with the bad attitude ...

as for standing up to me...... go for it...... tenni, stand up to me..... but I will not be run off the way you have tried to run off hetero females from the site cos they dared to stand up to you and put you in your place....... and that will enforce the image that people have of you.....cos its what they see......

strangely enuf... its the same way that society works.... they go by what they see......

[DuckiesDarling]

You know, I've stayed out of this thread but now I'm gonna give you the heterosexual point of view.

There are no good and no bad bisexuals. Your sexuality is not your entire make up and to me that's what this campaign is about. It's showing that you aren't the personification of stereotypes. That there are as many ways and lifestyles around bisexuality as there is in any other type of sexuality. There are monogamous bisexuals, there are polyamorous bisexuals, there are people who never in their life actually have an encounter but know in their hearts they are attracted to both genders either equally or in a mix that is comfortable for them.

Some of you say why should you let the heterosexual mainstream America know about all the various shades of grey in a world of black and white? Because quite frankly, without the support of the heterosexuals laws won't be passed, boundaries weren't be crossed and division walls will not be broken.

Take it or leave it, it's my last post in this thread.

[tenni]

Where Pasa do you see in the press release that Bi Visibility wants to present a positive image of bisexuals? Nope...that is not the purpose of this thread or the organization's campaign. You are a victim of trolling.

DD
Nice thoughts and I agree with you. However, I don't see the connection to the thread topic?

[Long Duck Dong]

Where Pasa do you see in the press release that Bi Visibility wants to present a positive image of bisexuals? Nope...that is not the purpose of this thread or the organization's campaign. You are a victim of trolling.


tenni read your very first post......

What are you thoughts on this release of information and the campaign?

"Chicago, IL , September 3, 2010—Bi Social Network is proud to announce our year long Bi-Visibility PSA Campaign, to promote positive role models of bisexuals in opposite and same-sex partnership

its in the first sentence....... positive role models....

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

Hey Tenni,
Why not?
GBLT have done it.
Blacks & Hispanics & Asian minorities pulled it off.
......... so why not the people who subscribe to legal adult swinger incest?

.............Here's the new version.......

"Chicago, IL , September 4, 2010—Bi SWINGER FAMILY Social Network is proud to announce our year long Bi-Visibility PSA Campaign, to promote positive role models of COUSINS, UNCLES, NIECES, bisexuals in opposite and same-sex partnerships and individual lives throughout the spectrum of our demographics. *** We have seen a bi-erasure effect in major LGBT publications, in film, politics and celebrities who have gone back into the bisexual closet for fear of being “needy, greedy and liars with their peers."
------------------end quote-----------------------

There will always be activism for the "next minority" to improve their rights. And the above is perfectly legal, used with maturity, judgment and all adults at "A family visit to the local swingers beach." See www.gsa.com or www.GeneticSexualAttraction.com.


-FredInSJ

Ok, I'm confuesd. WTF is This all about and what relivence does it have here???
Cat

[IanBorthwick]

Though we missed it, the entire campaign is about visibility and stopping Bi-Erasure.

http://bisocialnetwork.com/‘i-am-visible’-psa-campaign-kicks-off-store-for-bisexual-pride-day-sept-23/

There is nothiNG to do IN THE CAMPAIGN ITSELF WITH GOOD OR BAD BISEXUALS. Go to the back of the class Pasa, you missed what were talking about completely. LDD is simply saying, and I am repeating this for the last time because I am not coming back to this thread, that we are attacking ourselves from within and causing our own problems. The point that he tried to make, and I accepted as true, is that we cannot keep squabbling amongst ourselves about what makes us good or bad. It takes away from what's important. We are what we are and in huge diversity, only that and nothing more, but we can ruin this for ourselves by taking away from the impact through this interminable debate. We need to NOT worry about what anyone else thinks about us, not the Gay and Lesbian community that seeks to make us disappear by absorption and denial, and not the straight community that sees us as exactly the same as the G and L, albeit confused and with a 100 other stereotypical derogatory remarks involved.

I for one am going to get one of those shirts and wear it to Long Beach Pride this year....

[tenni]

Oh, I'm such an ass. It does refer to positive role models. Sorry Pasa, LDD and others.

My only explanation other than not reading slowly enough is "individual lives throughout the spectrum of our demographics". Positive role models must include the spectrum of our demographics. "Our demographics", I would state is important. It includes the wide spectrum of how we live as bisexuals and so that is not quite what LDD has mentioned about bad and good images. Positive role models will probably include historical figures who were /are bisexual rather than the actual sexual acts or how their relationships were. I might be wrong. It mentions "enrage" which is a forwarning that all may not think that the bisexual is a positive role model. Perhaps, a famous person's family will dispute that they were bisexual? Lots of possibilities that might enrage someone...lol

Ian is bang on with the comments about visibility and bi erasure. The only point Ian is that people like LDD should stop judging those of us who do not conform to his perception about how to live as a bisexual (good or good image). Accept all of us without judging about good and bad images or bisexuals. So, we agree on the concept but somehow you see LDD very differently than I do. With my latest asshole reading, there is a chance that I am wrong though.

[AidanS57]

You know, I've stayed out of this thread but now I'm gonna give you the heterosexual point of view.

There are no good and no bad bisexuals. Your sexuality is not your entire make up and to me that's what this campaign is about. It's showing that you aren't the personification of stereotypes. That there are as many ways and lifestyles around bisexuality as there is in any other type of sexuality. There are monogamous bisexuals, there are polyamorous bisexuals, there are people who never in their life actually have an encounter but know in their hearts they are attracted to both genders either equally or in a mix that is comfortable for them.

Some of you say why should you let the heterosexual mainstream America know about all the various shades of grey in a world of black and white? Because quite frankly, without the support of the heterosexuals laws won't be passed, boundaries weren't be crossed and division walls will not be broken.

Take it or leave it, it's my last post in this thread.

Very well said, DD.

Tenni, she is mentioning the campaign and the impact it could have on us, that to me means it is in the context of not just the OP but the posts that followed included someone questioning why bisexuals should care about heterosexual America. Sorry. but I think it's not only valid period but valid for this thread.

We do need every ally we can gather or we will never have any of the acceptance we push to achieve. Allies can come from all walks of life and all genders and sexualities. We can not afford to alienate a single one. Not the Christian that believes God loves us all, not the trans that doesn't consider themselves bisexual,not the lesbian who virulently hates men. We can't push anyone aside if we are going to achieve our goals, and that includes this site.

[dafydd]

Who cares if Heterosexual middle class America accepts, or does not accept bisexuals?

I'm not going to lose any sleep, worry, or care if Hetero middle class America accepts me or not for my sexuality that is not heterosexual.

Until you get attacked or sacked or your family suffer indirect discrimination because of who you're dating...these are real issues.

d

[tenni]

AidianS57
Thanks, yes I see it now. Thanks DD. Sorry for being a bit off but I don't know if they will get to changing laws in the year but I get your point. Seeing laws as by sexuality seems odd but in fact there is some truth to that point..unfortunately. First comes education and awareness seems to be the goal of this campaign.

"This campaign will exposure, uplift, enrage, empower and affect millions of bisexuals and our allies that want to stand up and be apart of a great BLGT community. We are in fact on a strong mission to make known biphobia and bi-erasure with stories, words, discussions, radio podcasts, news, interviews, images and imagination.
Phase 1: We will start with several phases throughout the year. The first phase will be using imagery in the form of photography.
Phase 2: We will move into the social media on our show Bi Talk Radio, Facebook, Twitter and mobile podcasting throughout this process.
Phase 3: We will move into learning about each other lives, by way of news and interviews via printed media.
Phase 4: We will move into the media of motion storytelling. Personal stories of bisexuals throughout the nation; locally, nationally and internationally with video.
This movement is for the famous and for the non famous. For the young and for the old; for the locally bisexual and for others who are far way. There are no limits to this campaign. Your passion to tell your story is all your need.
To learn more, please contact us if you want to participate, educate, sponsor or interview us."

[bisexual Bill]

Until you get attacked or sacked or your family suffer indirect discrimination because of who you're dating...these are real issues.

d

What makes you assume that I've never been bashed?

Or that my parents never had people who knew about my orientation say nasty things about me and my parents to my parents and other family members?

This was long before hate crime laws and going to the police reporting an assault was pointless since they would not take it seriously and they'd claim that you deserved being bashed.

No it was not fun but it happened a few times and I survived. At least I did not wind up like Matthew Shepherd.

I've been out at lots of jobs I've held through the years decades before when you could get discriminated and fired for being non-heterosexual if your employer was a bigot.

Gay, lesbian, and bisexual liberation in the 60s did not pander towards mainstream middle class heterosexual American citizens or their Heterosexism they try to put on gay, lesbian, and bisexual people.

Stonewall was not about conforming to heterosexuals or a heterosexual society at large at all. Neither were early GLB pride parades and political events.

[citystyleguy]

as is too often case, after reading all these postings, i forgot what the hell the original question was, so to repeat;

What are you thoughts on this release of information and the campaign?

that someone(s) in the community wants to post positive images, more power to them, it can at least do something to offset the other ugly news that's blasted from the headlines, and if you disagree with the results, create your own, engage with others to counter what you may disagree with, etc.

with the exception of encounters with repressive efforts and actions, i am in with DD, it will take the community, co-operatively and individually, to engage the surrounding communities to enact and encourage postive results.

[Long Duck Dong]

as is too often case, after reading all these postings, i forgot what the hell the original question was, so to repeat;

What are you thoughts on this release of information and the campaign?

that someone(s) in the community wants to post positive images, more power to them, it can at least do something to offset the other ugly news that's blasted from the headlines, and if you disagree with the results, create your own, engage with others to counter what you may disagree with, etc.

with the exception of encounters with repressive efforts and actions, i am in with DD, it will take the community, co-operatively and individually, to engage the surrounding communities to enact and encourage postive results.

my thoughts on it, have not changed...... don't sugar coat bisexuality and try and make it something its not

I am talking about things like the following.......

anna paguin stars in true blood, good actress, in a relationship with her partner... and ids as bisexual.....

not anna paquin is bisexual, and as a bisexual she has become a successful actor that has starred in many roles, her bisexuality allows her to be a diverse actress......

cos the truth is anna paguin stars in true blood, good actress, in a monogamous relationship with her partner... and ids as bisexual.....but doesn't have relationships or sexual activity with females.....

bisexuality is a aspect of us and who we are attracted to...... bisexuality doesn't make us better soldiers, writers, singers, dancers, cooks, astronauts..... being human and good at what we do, does that.....

[Pasadenacpl2]

Oh, I'm such an ass. It does refer to positive role models. Sorry Pasa, LDD and others.

My only explanation other than not reading slowly enough is "individual lives throughout the spectrum of our demographics". Positive role models must include the spectrum of our demographics. "Our demographics", I would state is important. It includes the wide spectrum of how we live as bisexuals and so that is not quite what LDD has mentioned about bad and good images. Positive role models will probably include historical figures who were /are bisexual rather than the actual sexual acts or how their relationships were. I might be wrong. It mentions "enrage" which is a forwarning that all may not think that the bisexual is a positive role model. Perhaps, a famous person's family will dispute that they were bisexual? Lots of possibilities that might enrage someone...lol

Ian is bang on with the comments about visibility and bi erasure. The only point Ian is that people like LDD should stop judging those of us who do not conform to his perception about how to live as a bisexual (good or good image). Accept all of us without judging about good and bad images or bisexuals. So, we agree on the concept but somehow you see LDD very differently than I do. With my latest asshole reading, there is a chance that I am wrong though.

Positive is in the eye of the beholder.

Convincing bisexuals to accept bisexuals is not doing any good, so who are we going to try to get to accept us? And how do we go about that? The quickest way is to show that we are not the stereotype. In order to do that, we should understand those stereotypes.

1. Bisexuals want to sleep with everyone they meet.
2. Bisexuals cheat on their mates and will use their sexuality as an excuse to do so.
3. Bisexuals have low moral standards.

THESE things will not be accepted by the greater community. They have nothing to do with who you sleep with, and everything to do with being good people.

There are some who say we should not sit in judgment of others. I agree that we should not condemn them to hell or try to do God's job for Him. However, as a parent, as a man, as a leader in my local community, I'll damn well sit in judgment of the type of people I want representing me.

Morals and ethics don't change just because you are bi or gay. I don't care that you cheat. That's between you and your wife/husband. But, when you use being bi as some sort of excuse, as a sexuality driven absolution, I will take exception. When you cheat, you are acting in an unethical way. When you cheat and blame being bi you are now saddling me with your lack of ethics. Especially so when the push is to gain more exposure for the B part of the GLBT community.

It bears repeating: The biggest problem the queer community has is the queer community. If we'd just start acting ethically, we'd solve half of our problems on a national level.

Pasa

[Long Duck Dong]

anna paquin is a nz'er and a friend of mine.......and despite the fact she is a good actress, shes just another human being..... and just another bisexual female......

shes a positive role model in that she is not using her bisexuality to gain a advantage or attention.....and she only came out publicly, in the campaign against bullying and intolerance......along side other LGBT......

before she became famous or a celebrity, she was very lgbt supportive in nz and that is the same as many of us non famous people that have worked hard and long for the lgbt community in nz and around the world......

and that is the same as any average person that tells their story and shares their pics in the campaign.... they are just normal people in different roles of life and they are bisexual......

to my understanding, the campaign wants stories from all walks of life, from the homeless to the rich and famous.... to show that we are everywhere and normal people.......

but its good to see that you are anti some bisexuals being in the public eye and part of the bisexual community.... thats a real boost to the people that only want their view of the lgbt to be seen...... is there any others you wanted excluded from the campaign ??????

maybe we can hold you up as a positive role model..... a bisexual that wants to exclude other bisexuals from the campaign for the crime of being good actresses....

[tenni]

Here are more details on what they want to do in 2011. Attached is the banner for Bisexual visibility Campaign

Why the Bisexual Community Need to Support Our Own Media

This is the very reason why the ‘I am Visible’ campaign has been launched. If we continue to wait for our gay and lesbian brothers and sisters to tell our stories, the full story of what is really going on in our community, will come when we are old and grey. I can’t understand, why any media would omit key information about an event that was a full day long event? Can you? Wouldn’t a LGBT Media want to go around the city and get interviews on bisexual day? I know, if I was representing the full community, I would?

Yet, we know especially in the gay and lesbian media they are the leaders of bi-erasure. They are moving on the side of reporting a small piece of news and making it out to be a small ‘blurb’ in the lives of bisexuals. Our goal is clear; this is the very mission what Bi Social Network will be doing this full year—is calling out the so called representatives of BLGT media and saying. “Where is the Bisexual story arch?” From what Windy City Times showed us on Bi Pride Day, its clear, our goals and interests isn’t necessarily the same.

If you feel strong about this issue, join us in writing a petition to all the so called LGBT media that say they are with us, and yet, their actions say we are invisible and don’t matter to their needs. Read more on groups that should be representing us called “Why Chicago’s LGBT Community Should Focus on Larger Issues that Affect the Full Community” on Associated Content.

What We Want to Do in 2011:

* 15 writers on a host of topics from youth to the elderly; to bi transgender to polyamory lifestyles and more.
* Photographers and artist to showcase bisexuals as they live.
* Bi Talk Radio: Bigger, bolder, better and longer.
* Bisexual Film festival. End of 2011-12! We want to see it happen!
* Bisexual events throughout the year.
* Bi Social Publishing: Bisexual Books, ebooks and more (Hint, we started this!)

.................................................. .................................................. .................................................. ...................
How many posters on this site commented on September 23 as Bisexual Day?

I know that I didn't nor did I know that it was Bisexual Day.

How visible and active are those who want a positive role model and think that this campaign is a good thing?

I know that I am not.

[tenni]

Segment on a famous bisexual and how bi erasure has been done in her biography from bi social network as part of Visibility Campaign

"........Years later in 2002, Julia Taymor, one of my favorite theatre directors, released the biographical film Frida, her directorial debut. Here the Mexican actress Salma Hayek starred and co-produced this film, which is one of her best performances. While I definitely saw Julia Taymor’s style as a film and theatre director, I also learned more about Frida Kahlo’s art work. In particular, the dark and perplexing self-portraits were reflections of her pain and sexuality. Both the film and her paintings showed both her struggles with health issues (from an accident as a teenager) and in relationships and marriage.

Most may be familiar with her famous passionate but rocky marriage to fellow Mexican artist, Diego Rivera. Rivera was a noted womanizer and had many affairs throughout their marriage. After seeing the film ‘Frida,’ I studied more of her art work, which only mentioned her tumultuous marriage and affairs.

Today bisexuality has been becoming more visible in the media and culture, although there still needs to be more acceptance of bisexuality. Once again, I am interested in Frida Kahlo, but with more focus on her personal life and struggles. While I recalled her affairs with both men and women, I was surprised that she was openly bisexual with her affairs, including one with Josephine Baker. This was in the 1920s through 1950s, where I find being openly bisexual at this time an amazing feat.

Being part Latin myself, I have been culturally and artistically inspired by Frida Kahlo. Now I am encouraged by her paintings of passion and sexuality, especially bisexuality. Bisexual artists like Frida Kahlo have helped open doors for other bisexuals. Hopefully more individuals will be inspired and encouraged to be openly bisexual, along with more acceptance of bisexuality."
.................................................. .................................................. .................................................. .......................
SINCE KAHLO WAS MARRIED AND HAD SAME SEX AFFAIRS, SOME PURITAN BI'S WOULD CONSIDER HER A BAD IMAGE? We do not know whether Diego frowned on it though. The movie shows her being upset with his affairs. Bi Social Network sees her as a good role model (not bad image). I agree with Bi Social Network

[Pasadenacpl2]

It is not puritanical to expect that, unless you have consent from your partner, you keep it in your pants. It is ethical.

Your attempts to marginalize those who expect good behavior from others will continue to fall flat, Tenni. Your words appear to show you to be a man with no moral or ethical imperative to treat their partner with dignity and respect.

Pasa

[Long Duck Dong]

I am bisexual...... males and females interest me and draw me to them..... yet I do not need to sleep with them all because I am bisexual....

I am bisexual, I have been a counsellor and therapist, a soldier, a prisoner, a druggie and a alcoholic, but not cos I am bisexual....

I am bisexual, I have had same sex and opposite sex partners, people that I care about deeply and that matter to me, but not cos I am bisexual....

I am bisexual, I have been for and against different lgbt stances, opinions, attitudes and stood for and against my lgbt brothers and sisters, but not cos I am bisexual....

I am bisexual, its a aspect of me, who I am, my lifestyle, my attractions, desires, nature, but I am who I am not cos I am bisexual.... but cos I am a human being......

we need to think about what bisexuality is, and what is a bisexual..... before we try and tell the world about who and what we are as people that are bisexual....

[Long Duck Dong]

@LDD-So what? A female actress or celebrity comes out as "bisexual" and now we're all supposed to support her and worship her?

There are lots of female celebrities like Lady Gaga, Madonna, and others who claim that they are "bisexual" but they really are not at all. Some even admitted to being bisexual in interviews and then later have said how they are not bisexual at all.

I hope they can get better representatives for bisexuality than the current "It Girl" flavor of the month "bisexual" TV and movie actress.

I'd rather see 1,000 normal average everyday people who are not TV or movie stars representing bisexuals than attention whore celebrities, actors, and actresses representing bisexuality.

If you are really friends with this actress you would not be name-dropping her like this on a public internet forum.

I have known and worked with famous people and people who once were famous.

I would not consider them to be friends just because we worked together or knew each other professionally at one point in our lives. They know who I am but we are not friends.

anna is a friend, a good friend......her being famous means nothing to me..... cos shes still anna, my friend......and I support her as a friend... the bisexuality is not why I support her....she is a friend

its in the same way that peter jackson is a friend, we both have a interest in ww2 movies and aircraft.... and no hes not bisexual, but hes still a friend..... and so what if he directed the lord of the rings movies and king kong...... he is still a friend......and I have helped work on the lord of the rings as a employee..... but he is still a friend......

anika moa is a nz singer and a good one....and she too is a friend.... she came out as a lesbian... and is still a friend.... I have share song lyrics with her.... not cos she is a lesbian or famous in nz.... but cos she is a friend....

and they all share the same thing as me, they are human regardless of how famous or not, they are.......

you are like the people in the thread that want to pick and choose the image of bisexuality.....

me, I simply want society to see we are human, we have issues, and we are bisexual in all its forms....... and not sugarcoat it or try and lie to society about bisexuality and being bisexual....
so nor should we pick and choose who presents the best look for bisexuality....

as and for lady gaga and madonna lying about their bisexuality or lack of it..... strange, its a trait some bisexuals do too...... so where is the difference between them and some bisexuals

[tenni]

Pasa
Having affairs regardless whether your partner agrees to it is considered immoral, unethical and bad behaviour by some whether they are bisexual or whatever. Sucking cock and taking it up the arse is considered immoral, unethical, and bad behaviour by some. There are more behaviours that some bisexuals involve themselves in that are immoral, bad behaviour and unethical by some.

[Pasadenacpl2]

What's your point, Tenni?

The question is: do you want to present a more positive image to the general populace?

It's a yes or no question. I'll wait here patiently while you answer. Again, it's a yes or no question.

Feral

[tenni]

I thought that most on this forum and others perceived being bisexual as a self identifying issue. If a person states that they are bisexual, accept it whether they are famous or not.

In the article about Kalo the point that I found the most important was her courage to present herself as a bisexual publicly so long ago. We are not given too many details as to how she did this.

As an artist, I know that there is an expectation if not peer pressure to accept divergence whether it be sexual, ethnicity etc. Artists are frequently individualists so much so that their commonality of thought with other artists can be a stretch to reach consensus...lol I would think but don't know if she presented herself as bisexual to other artists and intellectuals of her era. There may be an expectation of her peers to accept her. What would be interesting to have presented is any time that she presented herself as bisexual outside on an artist/intellectual environment. I doubt that this bi visibility campaign will present that but it might be interesting to read.

[Pasadenacpl2]

Pasa you've written about how you have cheated on your wife and had affairs with men and women.

Based on how you've cheated and had affairs, even you would not make a "positive" role model for bisexuality because you've had affairs and cheated on your wife.

Don't be so hypocritical and judgmental bully of a troll. I'm just sayin.'

Allow me just to correct your facts. I've written that I have cheated on my wife, yes. I did. I did this before I had even conceived of being bi. I also confessed, asked for forgiveness, and did my best to 'sin no more,' as it were. I have not cheated on my wife with a man, nor a woman since. I had never cheated on my wife with a man at all.

I'm not a hypocrite. I know what I did was wrong. My issues with cheating are thus:

1. People who justify cheating by saying that because they are bi they must cheat.

2. People not acknowledging that what they are doing is cheating.

3. Sleeping with someone of the same gender and not telling your spouse. A partner has the right to make an informed decision. This can be a matter of religious, as well as medical importance.

I don't ask anyone to do anything I haven't done, or am not willing to do. If my wife asked me to give up having sex with men, I would. Or, I would allow her to divorce me if she so chose (allowing for that informed decision). Fortunately, for me, we have decided to go with the open marriage option (best of both worlds). Not everyone is so fortunate, I realize.

My point in all this is that if we are to gain acceptance, we must combat the stereotype that we are promiscuous and will sleep with anyone anytime the itch needs to be scratched. Most of the GLBT community needs to combat that image. It is the image that the greater society cannot accept far more than the homosexuality itself.

Pasa

[Herbwoman39]

I'm fortunate.

I work for myself so it doesn't matter whether I'm out to my boss or what the employment laws say. I've been married to a man for over 13 years so I'm basically a "passer". I also have the added "benefit" </sarcasm> of never having slept with a woman. No blackmail material there.

I'm a middle-aged married white woman living in a small town. I've never *really* been discriminated against. I've never been fired from a job for my sexuality. I don't know what it's like to be afraid for my life because I'm Bi and living with someone of the same gender.

But the people that HAVE had to deal with these issues; the people who ARE dealing with these issues, THESE are the people who ought to be our role models. They're the ones who are in the trenches fighting this fight every single day.

The teenagers who are being bullied and threatened ought to be our role models. You know it's not just gay teens and tweens that are being bullied to the point of suicide. It has gotten better.

When I was 9 years old, Anita Bryant and people on the news let me know it wasn't safe to like someone of the same sex. So I stuffed it all down and pretended for 30 years that women were a form of art and it was that artistic aspect I was attracted to; not the women themselves.

Ian's right. We HAVE to stop fighting. Yes there are some things that people do that we may not like or approve of. But those things ARE a part of our community whether we approve or not. We're not HERE to approve or disapprove of someone's choices.

The point of this ramble is that being "out" is scary enough without our own community at each others throats. I used to feel safe being out. It's easier for me than for many others. But after all of this in-fighting, I just want to crawl back into the closet where it's safe and warm. I'm tired of feeling like I'm being judged for everything I do or don't do. Whatever it is, it's never enough. I'm either not "out" enough or I'm trying too hard. There's no middle ground and I'm tired of trying.

[tenni]

Herbwoman39
I suspect that you are correct that the campaign will tell the stories of "average" bi people. I'm sorry that you feel pressured by others to be out more than you are comfortable. Just be yourself and grow to be comfortable with doing whatever you need to do or not do. If people pressure you to be more out, ignore it. There is no need to do anything publicly about your sexuality if you do not feel the need.

What do you feel the pressure or need to do that you are not doing? Do you feel the need to speak out if you hear a homophobic comment? Or do you just ignore it. I don't think that it matters how you react though.

[tenni]

Anna Paquin stated in a "I give a damn" PSA ""I'm Anna Paquin. I'm bisexual and I give a damn,"

I have not heard that she has made a public statement about whether she is being monogamous though? Does someone have a comment from her as proof or is someone speculating that because she is engaged that she is monogamous? I didn't hear any details about her bisexuality. Lady Gaga has not given any details about her bisexuality. All that is being said is that they are bisexual. They are being visible about their sexuality and no juicy bits of info are being disclosed.

If anything is being suggested in the recent Rolling Stone's cover it is that the two men (Paquin's fiance Steven Moyer and the other blonde guy ) may be inferring a threesome for at least their characters. Does that infer that the two men are bi or are "sharing" Paquin...lol

[darkeyes]

My point in all this is that if we are to gain acceptance, we must combat the stereotype that we are promiscuous and will sleep with anyone anytime the itch needs to be scratched. Most of the GLBT community needs to combat that image. It is the image that the greater society cannot accept far more than the homosexuality itself.

Pasa

I go along with most of what you say Pasa, but do take issue with this last paragraph. There are within the str8, gay and bisexual communities, those who do sleep with whomsoever they fancy whenever they fancy.. as a bisexually active girl I did that right up till not long before I was married for the first time. It was good and it was fun. I have few regrets. After my hubbie and I separated I resumed a very promiscuous, though not bisexual but lesbian lifestyle, even if for several years considered myself bisexual before the penny finally dropped.

I am not blowing my own trumpet here, nor am I talking about fidelity, I am simply talking about living my life to the full and enjoying it with gay abandon (no pun intended). There is absolutely nothing wrong with people of whatever sexuality sleeping with whoever to have that itch scratched.. not in principle. We have to get away from this idea that we are considered sluts because so many of us sleep around and love every minute of it. We have to get away from expressing regret and shame that so many of us do this for there is quite simply nothing whatsoever wrong with it.. it is a lifestyle choice. Because we are promiscuous does not make us sluts.. it makes us very human. Bisexuals are no better or worse than the gay or heterosexual communities in this respect, but quite possibly, if very contentiously, more promiscuous.. some studies point to that but knowing the lesbian community as I do, the bisexual as I do and the straight community, I have my doubts.

Possibly we should combat the image that bisexuals are overly promiscuous, but the truth of the matter is that many are just that.. just as many gays are and heterosexuals. What we should be combating is the "dirtyness" of sex and the hypocrisies our societies have toward sex and allowing people to live with the joy of sex without being considered a slut. Freeing them from this restrictive practice of one man one woman, or in the case of the gay and bi communities the 1 to 1 syndrome.

None of this is to say that monogamy is something in itself reprehensible.. it is not.. it is a lifestyle choice which many people, even most make, including myself of late. Take the issue of cheating aside and forgetting it for now, for that is an entirely different argument although related.. the fact of the matter is that whatever we are.. whoever we are, we should be free to make our own life choices without the condemnation of a seedy and hypocritical society, live with and love those we choose, have sex with whom and as many as we wish without any judgement by a society which has itself been judged and found seriously wanting.

Kate is not one who found promiscuity came easily. She has had her moments but these almost destroyed her. I am sure she will not mind me saying that for it is no more than the truth. Yet why does she have such a hang up about it? She was not raised particularly religious and is in her own way quite the little rebel at times.. but she was raised by loving, pretty liberal if not liberated parents who did instill in her the life fidelity thing which I have always found so difficult to understand. I would rather we had an open relationship, yet have accepted her way because the depth of feeling I have for her and knowing just what it would do to her, and knowing that if I pressed the issue we would not last 5 minutes.. that little word love has a lot to answer for.. no, thats not right.. society and its restrictive practicies and its hypocrisies have a lot to answer for.. but I would rather have her, restrictions and all, than the other way.. I lived that for a while as some on site know, and no thank you.. never again..

Those of us who wish to continue a free lifestyle, "scratching their itches" whenever the opportunity arises, should be allowed to do so.. the bisexual community should not be ashamed that many do this for it is not the only community of sexual people.. more we should argue for its respectability and acceptance as a valid lifestyle, and argue within all the sexual communities for the removal of the stigma which promiscuity has in our societies... as long as that promiscuity is honest and above board... then why should we feel shame for it? I loved it... and if I had my time over again would live an equally promiscuous life, scratching those itches as often as I felt the need... although I must admit, I would make a few changes... if only in those partners who were not up to the mark, which includes the guy to whom I lost my virginity.... those very few (and they were very few) who were in some way abusive.. and the 4 year hiatus which was my first marriage..

It is not the sexual communities who must change.. it is society and its hypocrisies..

[tenni]

I agree with darkeyes completely

I'm not offended if Pasa and others chose a monogamous lifestyle whatever their sexual preference is. To each their own. I have chosen to be monogamous at points in my life and may again someday. I don't consider myself all that sluttish though. I'm just not monogamous at present.

The word "slut" has several meanings with the original meaning "a careless, dirty, slovenly woman; slattern (poor hygiene and grooming)" but its modern meaning has to do with being promiscuous. I've used it recently to joking refer to not being loyal to an organization....lol


I get the impression that those bisexuals who are offended that other bisexuals are a bit more "free lov'n" than them is that it makes their life difficult to make their partner believe that they are not sluts?....lol Why is this more inappropriate in a bisexual rather than all the hetero "free lovers"?

Pasa is not monogamous anyway from what he posts. Why be concerned then?

After society accepts all the variations of sexual preference, maybe the prudish aspect of some parts of society may stop being hung up about monogamy? I think that campaign comes quite some time after the visibility campaign though.

[Long Duck Dong]

Bisexuals who do not come out or try to educate people about bisexuality are entirely responsible for their own bisexual erasure and biphobia.

Does anyone else here feel this way? Or does anyone else here besides LongDuck feel as though bisexuals are responsible for being misunderstood and not seen by others?

Put it this way, imagine what would have happened if everyone that's GLBT had stayed complacent to heterosexist society, stayed closeted, and never came out or told anyone else about their sexuality.

You don't see gay men, lesbians, or Trans people saying how they have to stay in the closet and never come out. So why do a few vocal bisexuals here claim that it is best to stay closeted and never come out?

By far the best thing bisexual people can do is come out and tell other people about being bisexual.

there would be a lot more cheating and lieing in the bisexual community if we were to all hide and remain closeted and a lot more blaming the bisexuality for our actions :tong::tong::tong:

I would perfer more bisexuals were out and honest with their partners, it may prevent a lot of divorces and shattered lives.......

sure not all partners are ok with sharing their partners, but by the same token, there is a lot of partners that are fine with it, that has never been given the chance to do that, cos their partners have assumed they will not allow it.....

I took the risk with DD and outted myself, before we got together.... as I viewed it as it would be better for me to lose a potential partner than lose a partner cos I lied and cheated to them....... so its not like my advice to others is not something I have not done myself.......

if DD has said no to a open relationship and I wanted one... then we would have never got together but remains good friends..... as it stands, DD has said ok to it but I have said no thanks, it would cause me issues.....

am I a positive role model for the LGBT cos of that ???? ... well as I notice in the site, I am viewed as wrong for not embracing DD's offer, I am wrong for being monogamous by nature..... and I am wrong cos I do not take sides... I express opinions that contradict each other cos I look at the individual aspects of a issue, and form a opinion on each individual aspect, so my opinions conflict with other aspects of the same issue.....

and that leads to me believe that what is seen as the best role models, are bisexuals that have numerous partners, do not accept that monogamy is real for some and not for others, and will always take the bisexuals side, regardless.......

strangely enuf that rules out most of the forum in one aspect or another lol