Failure of Belle..Southern that is.

[onewhocares]

Ok, I admit it, I will NEVER be a Southern Belle. My name is Belle and I am from Boston, and as many of you know, I am an event planner and caterer. It has often been joked in the past that our dear Kate is the Southern Belle and I am the Northern version. Well recently I was asked to make southern classic…. fried chicken. I am never one to shy away from a challenge, so I ventured into the kitchen thinking how bad can it be.

Three days later, after chopping chicken, getting burned by grease and the worst part…having to endure the comments of failure from my mother in law, I throw in the towel. Some Background. The other night I popped into chat, my MOST valuable resource from around the globe to answer culinary question. Odd, you may think, not so. We have a wonderful group of folks here who can cook up a storm. There is an old cooking/recipe thread that I got some great ideas from especially from those culinary cuties down under.

Can someone, without being too beating, tell me what I did wrong? I took two whole chickens and cut them into ten pieces of approximately the same size, all on the bone. I put them in zip lock bags which held buttermilk, salt, black pepper, cayenne pepper, granulated garlic, onion powder, celery salt, ground thyme, paprika. I let them soak for 28 hours. I bought a couple of gallons of Wesson Vegetable Oil (fried chicken on the label). I had heard that you needed to fry in Crisco, so I bought two big ole cans of the shortening, but in the recipes that I found on Food TV.not one called for melting the goop down. I made two batters. One was flour with cayenne, Dijon mustard, egg and milk. The other was a beer batter…I used O’Douls. Do you think that if I had invested in a Heineken that it would have made the difference?

I poured the oil in a deep enamel cast iron Dutch oven and let it rise slowly to 350 to cook the meat. I tested the oil with a baby potato and learned it was perfect. I popped the first four pieces into the beer batter and I do not know what happened. The little pieces, with a thick wrapper of the beer batter expanded like a really aroused cock. I was shocked. Guess I put too much baking powder in that coating mixture. (Wonder if the batter will work on a man?) Twenty minutes later the chicken was golden brown and I drained it on old brown paper shopping bags then into a warming oven. It looked like something from a science fiction movie. So I say… Belle, try something else. So I dredged the next batch in an egg wash with Dijon mustard, mild herbs and then into flour. Well those actually did look nice.

At this point I asked myself what am I doing. I can bake a lobster, steam clams, catch a fish and shuck oysters, but I was brought down by the generic chicken by a recipe from the good ole southern folks which I was not expecting; I hereby lay the crown of king to the feet of Colonial Saunders of Kentucky Fried Chicken Fame. My test kitchen, family guinea pigs ate bisquts (the ones you peel the paper off and hit on the counter and they pop out of the can), gravy (no lumps and yummy), turnip greens (bitter), fried okra (little green pencil erasers with holes like spokes on a bicycle tire), mashed potatoes (yummy), coleslaw and cranberry sauce. Another thing….it is going to take me ages to get the smell of the oil out of my house. As I write, we have a huge pot of cinnamon sticks, oranges, cloves and ginger on the stove trying to rid the aroma of the house. Any thoughts on getting the smell out?

To all you ladies and gentlemen who have perfected this culinary challenge, I salute you. I bow to your talents.

Belle
The Northern

[DuckiesDarling]

Belle, honey, chicken can be deceptively hard at times but simple works best.


I do some pretty good chicken, but then I'm from Kentucky. My mom used to drench the chicken in buttermilk, then dredge in flour mixture with salt, pepper, sometimes adding cayenne. Personally I also add in a bit of garlic powder.

I don't use the buttermilk with mine. I just rinse the chicken and leave in a bowl of cool not cold water and then cheat and use a ziploc bag or even just one of those little plastic tubs with lids. Toss in the piece, shake well to evenly coat, as you pick it up out of the flour before you put it in the oil (personally I use vegetable oil but crisco will do fine) you shake off the excess flour. Then drop it carefully into the oil and wait til bottom begins to brown then turn over. I find it's best to cook in a cast iron skillet but that's what I'm used to, don't put too much oil in just enough to come up halfway over the chicken. It gives you a bit more control. Cook til juices run clear and then drain on a couple paper towels for easy cleanup.

The key to any really good batter on a piece of chicken is just to really have a dusting of the flour, panko crumbs or even cornflakes. Whatever you prefer. The coating will be crunchy and the chicken still tender and juicy. All in all while food network has some decent recipes sometimes simpler is much better.

I remember I made some when I was down in NZ for Duck and told him "there you can have some real KFC ":)

[Long Duck Dong]

lol ok....

I do marinate the chicken but I am eccentric so I have a recipe that few people dare try..... and it requires Kiwifruit (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kiwifruit)

take 2 bananas and 4 kiwifruit, mash and 1/4 cup of scotch whiskey and blend into a liguidified paste, spead over the skinless, boneless chicken fillets and leave in a fridge for 24 hours.....

bake in a oven until you are happy with the texture and take out to cool....

I whip up eggs and melted butter, coat the chicken with it, then roll in seasoned flour or breadcrumbs and put in warm oil, then heat the oil with the chicken in it, or pan fry, depending on the thickness of the chicken....

its a acquired art, getting the taste right so its not recommended by beginners, but belle I have the feeling you would get it right.....

if using a beer beer with seasoned chicken, I would use a lager beer, not a stronger beer like a stout.....

[12voltman59]

I didn't learn directly how to fry chicken from one of my grandmas, but went at doing it from memory---she used cast iron skillets too and I have had luck with doing chicken that way--I think the only way you want fry chicken in something deeper---you need a true deepfat fryer.

My other grandma used an electric skillet and made fine tasting chicken too--once again--you don't really have all that much oil in either sort of pan

As far as working with the chicken prior to cooking----I have found that for me--it works best to let the chicken sit in a shallow, covered container filled with my buttermilk/seasoning wet mix--then a few hours before frying---take it out---then dredge the chicken in flour--then once the pieces are covered--put them on a flat sheet, putting them back in the fridge for a few more hours-----dropping them in the hot oil when they are still cold.

It took me awhile to make some decent chicken myself and sometimes it still doesn't come out too well--it is something that is such a seemingly easry and certainly fundamental dish is not so easy to do well.

Keep at it Belle----you are a great belle to me---whether or not you live in the north or south.

[Realist]

Belle,

I called my cousin and she said, "For one thing, them Yankees can't cook chicken right..it ain't in their blood!"

I reminded her that my ex, who was a solid, 100% Pennsylvania Yankee, could cook southern food with the best of them.

Cuz will tell me how she fries chicken, but she was about to leave for work, when I called. She said she'd call me tomorrow and give me her recipe. She's kind of a cranky recluse, or I'd give you her e-mail address.

I can tell you that no one I know has ever put that much seasoning in their chicken batter. It's plain and simple...with probably no more than salt and pepper, with flour/ batter .......and the grease is extremely hot, before the chicken is put in. I think it's maybe 375- 400 degrees....nearly smoking.

I think my grandmother fried chicken in a pressure cooker, but she's the only one I ever saw who did that. Her chicken was delicious and always very tender, though!!

I've decided that I'll never be a good cook and will stick to hamburgers, salmon, and opening cans! The effort it takes and the mess I make just ain't worth it! Anyway, my sister will usually cook something and invite me over, just before I starve to death!

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

Soaked the cluck in Buttermilk?? Uhmm..ok. Babygirl, I think you are getting a might too fancy here. And there was Waaayyy too much grease/oil mentioned. The cast iron skillit was great, but the batter wudnt. Some people will make like a beer batter or even a good tempura, but I have found from growing up poor, that plain ole flour or even better yet, Bisquick and spices, works best. And if you want to cheat a bit due to time restraints, dredge your chickie in a bit of flour or Bisquick, and pop it in the micro for 7 to 10 minutes in a glass pan. Sprinkle it down with Lowery's seasoned salt and maybe a touch of garlic salt..not much but a little..
Heat your oil, (Not Crisco fer Gawds sakes, I can feel my arteries hardening as I type the word) in a good pan and keep the heat low until the chickie comes out of the micro. Put your bigger pieces in first: thighs, breasts and back, neck and gizzard, then cook them for like 15 minutes, turning your heat up a bit. Once it starts to brown a tad on all sides, put the legs and wings in. Get a good scald going, then put a lid on it for like 5 more minutes, but keep checking it. Remove your lid and turn the heat up until it starts ti sizzle well. Keep turning the chickie until its a bit crispy, but not cremated. Essentually what you are doing is Searing it after it coming out if the micro, and getting that skin slightly crispy is a Wondrful thing.
If you Want to do it the old fashioned way, then do the same method but dont use the micro. The key is good even cooking, not drowning it in grease.:eek:
Hope that helps a little, Sweetie.
Cat, Con-ah-suer...lol

[Doggie_Wood]

. . . . . . As I write, we have a huge pot of cinnamon sticks, oranges, cloves and ginger on the stove trying to rid the aroma of the house. Any thoughts on getting the smell out?


Belle
The Northern

You could mask the smell with a pot of JD's World Famous Gumbo - jk

I once bought 10 boxes of fried chicken (no time to cook it) from Chicken Express for an event and loaded 'em into the back of my car.
After the event was over I went to my car and the lingering smell of the fried chicken was almost nauseous.
I went to The Home Depot and bought some Odo Ban and commenced spraying the car with that. I did that for several days in a row and, WALLLAH! the smell was gone. Odo Ban is a neutralizer and eliminates oil based odors.

Hope this helps sweetie.


Doggie :doggie:

[littlerayofsunshine]

Aww Belle. Chicken definitely isn't that easy. I was taught at a young age, about age 6, to prepare and cook it. I brine my chicken for a few hours in seasoned cold water in an air tight container. If you have a Vacuum sealer it takes only about half an hour to an hour to brine. I would never use buttermilk to soak chicken in, because it's acidic and would begin to cook it. Plus the buttermilk would interact with the baking soda in the all purpose flour. Some like to dredge in milk. But I just double dip from the seasoned flour, to the brine, back into the flour and you get a nice flavored coating that ends up very crispy. I was sort of raised the rachel ray way and never measure anything cept with baking.

To get the smell out the quickest way. You need a grease cutting cleaner. Pinesol works well. And washing your walls and cabinets down is a good solution. Frying like that for so long puts so much grease flying through the air and it sticks to anything and everything.


Look at it this way hunny. You have always been a woman of adventure and this was just another one for you. And just like hot sex. Leaves its mark and smell on you ;)

[onewhocares]

THANK YOU all for your very informative comments.

I just had to run home...18 hours after the frying. Oh my word....when I opened the door to my back hall... it was like I hit a wall of fat lingering in the air. All this after we slept with every door and window open and kept a huge stock pot of water boiling with cinnamon sticks, ginger, cloves and oranges to try and make the house smell better.

Dogwood...I am on the way to Home Depot this afternoon.

Belle

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

Thats why ya dont Fry chickie any more, Girlfriend..ya Bake or broil the little monster! lol And try to find a product known as Awesome, if you can. Its a great degreaser, and baking soda or pet fresh on the carpets will get rid of the smell too. Also washing your counter tops and cabinets with baking soda water helps a great deal. :}
Good Luck Sweetie.
Cat

[Nadir]

All this posts mentioning fried chicken are making me angry... I was originally going to have scrambled eggs with ham and bacon tonight, but my mom has basically told me that she doesnt want to be my slave and to make myself dinner... so well, now unless I want the kitchen to explode, I guess I will make myself a sandwich.

[RockGardener]

Belle, repeat after me.....

"In the future, I will acquire my fried chicken from a professional source, already fried and in a nice box."

Rock

[Realist]

Publix grocery stores in Florida has some of the best friend chicken anywhere!

I still like KFC original recipe, too!

[BareHunter45]

Belle,

I grew up in Maine. I am now working in the southwest (Pennsylvania). Some will say that is not the south west, but if you're from Maine it is...

Sooooo....if you live in Mass...you will always be a southern Belle to me:bigrin:

Bill

[Kiowa_Pacer]

OMG Miss Belle. Sounds like you had a terrible time. I dont eat chicken on the bone as a rule, but I have to say that Cat makes the best chciken I have ever tasted. Ask her about the kind that she marinaded in beer and spices. *Mouthgasm inserted here*

I hope your next try is better, and I know it will be sensational...just like you. :}
Ki