The thread regarding the best lube for anal sex caused me to think of another more pressing question for me. If never engaged in anal sex, but I understand it can be painful the first (or even subsequent) time(s)? Is there anything you can do to lessen the pain so you can enjoy the experience?
a product called "anal ease"
Learn to breath and relax and make sure your partner takes his time getting started. He has to work his way in slowly. And practice with a battery operated boyfriend first. Get use to sticking something up there. As for lube, JO HO water based lube is the best I’ve found.
You are what you are, you dream what you dream
Anal Ese is not that wonderful i tired it and it still hurt...going slow and easy with plenty of lube is the best bet
I have found Adam and Eves anal lube to be great. I do have some experience receiving and have found this lube the best. I have no problems recommending it.
You really can't have too much lube, and patience..and yeah - the feeling isn't always the easiest to get used to - but like others have said - try toys first - it isn't a race - some people just won't care for it - but give it chance for at least 10 minutes with toys first and see..
yeah.....bite on a bulletOriginally Posted by BBMfan08
The thread regarding the best lube for anal sex caused me to think of another more pressing question for me. If never engaged in anal sex, but I understand it can be painful the first (or even subsequent) time(s)? Is there anything you can do to lessen the pain so you can enjoy the experience?
Cheers Chook
If you've never done it before, start off with something small, a dildo about the same size as a broomstick or even your fingers. PLENTY OF LUBE, I like ForPlay the best. It's really slippery and really thick, not watery. Tilt the bottle and see how slow it moves.
Having an enema (Fleet, get it at any drug store).first is a big help. It makes the whole experience more pleasurable because it's cleaner and can help reduce the bloated feeling some may experience.
Go slow! YOU control the speed of entry, not someone else. Turning the dildo in circles as it enters eases entry and feels good too. If it starts to be uncomfortable don't back out all the way. Back out just enough to be on the comfort edge and hold it there for a little bit. As your muscles relax, turn it a little and push it in a little more. Once it's past your sphincter, just hold still and get used to it. Once it's in for a while pump it in and out a few strokes, learn the feeling of being filled up and stroked. Pushing out with your butt muscles also helps ease entry. Once again, use something small enough, this isn't a contest.
Try removing it and re-inserting. You'll be amazed at how easy it goes in once your muscles relax and get used to it. As you stroke, try to put pressure on your prostate. It's a whole new world!
Go up in size as you get used to the smaller ones. You'll find your own comfort level. I gage by circumference. Most that I know can comfortably manage about 1 1/2" diameter or about a 4 3/4" circumference. ENJOY!
I like Wet for lube, and as for the anal act its self.... The jury is still out, although I enjoy it more now than I did to begin with. I know my husband enjoys it, so I "treat" him every so often. But, I do somewhat enjoy it myself. I used to HATE it. It was painful, uncomfortable, and just didn't feel right... But with experimenting, taking it slow, me being in control of the speed, and my husband just being still and understanding, oh, and since I'm aI get to play with my clit while we're in the process, in effect giving us both pleasure at something that used to be just for him, it has gotten to where I even enjoy it.
~It's not everyday you find a girl who'll flash someone to get you out of detention.~
Re: Anal sex
patience, lube, lube, fleets enema after emptying out bowels, control the pace of insertion ( have him sit on chair and lower self down) didnt find dildo or vib did mucht to allay the first time discomfort ) but partner worked fingers for a while when starting butt remember lube lube lube butt more important HE MUST USE CONDOM this for his sake too due to bacteria may cause bladder infection
to get use to anal sex you need to start with lube and a finger first this will ease you into it. after a short time go to a small anal toy. before you know it there will be very little or no pain at all. just remember the lube. adam and eve has the best lube i think.
what pleasure if any do women actually get from anal?
is anal messy ? how do you overcome this ?
Re: Anal sex
That is entirely up to the recipient. Personally, if I know in advance that I will be receiving anal sex, I try to do a personal enema until it comes out clear. More than likely that will help. Also, due to frequency of how often I do it (I normally do it about 2-3 times a month) I don't have to worry about anal dehydration. So far, that is the easiest method I know to keep it clean, although some fluids will always be there, it is just sort of clear once you have cleaned yourself out. One thing that will help as well is having a pretty regular diet so that it isn't quite as messy. I hope this helps you to "clear" things up. It really isn't that messy in my experience though with these tips.
Also, in terms of the OP, I tend to prefer Astroglide™ because I can purchase it at the local Walmart and it has the best lubrication that I have found at a reasonable price. It can seem like a pretty loose liquid, but I have never had any discomfort with it for years while I have used it. I just wanted to give you another option if you are shopping around. Also, I really spent time to gain a better understanding of my body and things that I do nowadays, I would never have dreamed of doing when I started experimenting. Since then, I can take most medium things and am still researching on "broadening" my horizons, so to speak. Finally, one thing that really helps me to get accustomed was to use butt plugs to widen up before the actual sex since if I am already dilated, it makes it easier for penetration since it is already loose.
Last edited by PhoenixRising35; Sep 11, 2008 at 6:57 PM. Reason: Forgot to mention techniques for OP
Lube is necessary, but for me the "pain" the "hurt" is what is so pleasurable.
It should be a filling discomfort - which in turn starts the production of endorphins which increases the pleasure.
But be aware of any sharp pain - if that happens - STOP immediately.
The question was asked what pleasure do we get???
This lady gets plenty. Intimacy, endorphin highs, closeness caused by trust, the sense of feeling every square milimetre of your partner ... and fantastic orgasms.
From a woman's perspective..........I happen to love anal sex. First in my mind is have a patient, caring and giving lover is most important. Of the lubes mentioned, I happen to love Adam and Eves lube the best. I have tried most of the ones mentioned above,but I like the texture of it and that it does not dry out. For me, I find that when a lover plays with my hole, massaging, probing and sort of flirting with it makes it a great begining. When things come to him actually coming in..slow insertion and me gently rocking back into him works well. I am not one who is into any pain at all, so I would stop if you are uncomfortable. I happen to find leaning over an upholstered chair is perfect for me, then hubby can hold my hips and it is as pleasurable for him as it is for me. Then I will use my strap on and give back to him. Double the pleasure.
Belle
for me, before i am about to get anal, i always take a shower and wash up first, then a take my finger (soapy) and i stick it in and clean the inside. i love pain so i aint complaining about that at all, but if your one who hates pain then try it in the shower. that was my first and it didnt hurt what so ever. the water acts as a lube. but if your not in the shower, always use your finger and play around so you can get relaxed. and when you get ready to enter it helps to hold your breath as you first enter.. hope this helps but i LOVE anal, its wonderful
I agree with the above post, If you can shower, or even better a bath soak in a hot bath it will relax the muscles. Lube is always a must, there is limited ability for the anus to produce lubrication even saliva breaks down fast , otherwise you will get sore and torn tissue. If you or if you have a partner willing slowly work a finger or two working the lubricant applying pressure on the sphincter muscle, be paitent and work around the muscle,as you are massaging it.
relax, and start slowly. Enjoy!
i founf that you have to relax and be open! once you feel a cock slowly slide inside you, you will be hooked as the orgasm that comes from anal stimulation is far more intense that anything else
its also very liberating for a guy to be feminine and lay back and enjoy anal sex in a beautiful passive way
You know, I have had my girlfriend use a toy on me. It didn't hurt but it didn't really feel pleasurable either. She got more out of it than I think I did. The only thing I think that would feel good is the real thing. I had a guy try anal on me but he was pushing too hard, plus he was pretty thick. I think if I can find a guy thats not so thick, it would feel awsome!
I don't think there is any one best lube to use. As one who has had many many hard cocks and other things shoved up his ass I speak from experience.
When I started putting objects up my butt at a young age I used whatever was available. Spit, soap, I stuck my cock up my friends ass, we were about 10 yo. we used soap. It hurt him, he yelled and pulled away. I know I was in him as my cock was dirty when he pulled away.
Later In HS I had anal sex with two buddies. At that time the slickest stuff we knew was wave set gel. Our mothers used it to set their hair. We fucked each other many times using it. I've used hand lotion, comercial lubes, anything thats slick and slippery. I don't think the lube is as important as going slow and not hurting your partner.
The anus is designed for exit and when used as an entrance it can be uncomfortable. I myself like to feel a little discomfort, not pain but feeling the stretching is enjoyable also.
ubes, there is an insert that u can put in which provides hours long lube inside, but any of the lubes generously applied will be ok, important thing is to allow the guys cock to glide inside without pain so u can begin to enjoy the sensuality of being fucked in its own right without tightness interfering
Re: Anal sex
I agree on the Adam and Eve lube or any water based lube when you are using condoms which is smart unless you know the other guy really well. Starting out with you on top so you can lower yourself slowly onto your partner's cock helps too. You can work yourself up and down until you take it all and a little at a time makes it easier. Anal is not for everyone but if you ever get used to it and enjoy it you will come back for more. I always jo while riding a cock and man do I shoot cum all over the place.
Having recently had my first, I pushed against him while spreading my cheeks doggy style, with my sphincter muscles tight as if I was gonna poop and I used a little lube. I loved it.(safely)
i'm 18 and i've taken a 28 yr old
beat that
Unless it's the mere fact is that you took a cock from a man that was 10 years older than you...I am not sure I see what there is to beat. I mean...age by no means denotes size, ability or finesse.....so if you're gonna brag, by all means let us know what you have to brag about.
Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: "What! You too? I thought I was the only one."
C. S. Lewis
i got you beat i'm 47 and i made love to a 19 year old girl when i was 46...and we went all night long. we wore both of us out by morning... now thats braging...
shit my last girl friend was 13 years younger then me and my wife is 12 years older and i have had a man that was 24 years older so what was the big dial about doing some one only 10 years older?...
Last edited by steve617413; Nov 22, 2008 at 5:38 PM.
^Heh that's an old pic but very funny!
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