How did the ladies get started?

**Realist** · Dec 7, 2009, 10:36 AM

First time stories have always been interesting to me.

Both me and my first wife began our bisexual life with someone of the same gender, who was older. My GF began with someone her age.

I think most began with someone of the similar age. Usually, those who respond to these posts are the guys, but my primary interest is in how the Ladies began their journey.

For some reason, I feel more comfortable with the methods females use, as a rule, to recruit a new lover. They appear to be more interested in the cerebral approach, rather than the more base methods used by some guys.

Personally, I can't get interested in a platonic approach. I have never had a one night stand, or been with a guy I didn't know well and trust, first. I do not have any interest in just getting laid and leaving...I think most women who I've talked to about this feel the same way.

So, I'd be very interested to read how any of you ladies first felt the desire to be with another female, and how you consummated your first encounter. Then, how did it end...if it did?

Even if you haven't been with anyone, what would encourage you to begin an intimate relationship?

**HelloToYou** · Dec 7, 2009, 2:20 PM

I agree with the more "cerebral" approach. I have never been with a woman before, but I'm not interested in a physical connection without first having established an emotional connection that involves knowing a person fairly well. As for the age thing, she has to be at least 18. Other than that, it's mostly about our connection and ability to relate. I can't really see being with someone much over 30 though.

**Karasel** · Dec 7, 2009, 6:46 PM

I've always been interested in both girls and guys, for as long as I can remember. It was all innocent enough at first of course, writing "I love Harley Quinn," in my notebook... (big Batman geek here) and Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer stole my heart.

But it wasn't till Jr. High when I dated my first guy, and another years later when I was with a girl. I never really thought any other way, just always always like both genders.......... Don't know if that was on topic or not.

**innaminka** · Dec 8, 2009, 4:09 PM

Nothing cerebral about my "start."
Pure, fortuitous chance with a woman - also a bi-virgin - my own age.

It happened in my early 30's and went a way to answering all those strange, unfulfilled feelings and unanswerable questions that were arising more and more in regard to my ability to have full relationships with men.

**Realist** · Dec 8, 2009, 6:00 PM

My first wife and I discussed our early introduction to sexual relationships by older, same gender people. We both wondered if we'd still be bi, if we'd never experimented, or experimented with kids our own ages........who knew no more than we did, or if we'd waited until we were older?

We'll never know, but we both were very interested in both sexes at an early age. It appears that the spectrum of ages, when we all were initiated, is all over the board.

**welickit** · Dec 9, 2009, 10:16 AM

I was in my late 20's and the first experience was certainly not planned nor did I expect it. I was coaching an all girl softball team at the time. During an afternoon practice session I pulled a muscle in my shoulder. Driving myself home was an option but driving with ice packs wasn't such a good idea. One of the girls offered to drive me and my car home. She carried my gear in for me and helped get the ice packs and my wet shirt off. She offered to give me a back rub. All very innocent, she rubbed and we talked. My being naked wasn't unusual as everyone on the team normally showered in the locker room before heading home. While the back rub felt good I told her I thought it was time to stop. She asked why, I told her I was starting to feel it. She asked what I meant by that, and I told her it was making me horny. I spoke before thinking about what I was saying. She asked me if that was a bad thing or a good thing. I told her it was far from bad feeling. She continued the massage but she was no longer concentrating on my back. We spent the next two hours exploring each other. Oddly she told me she had never touched another female before but she had thought about it for quite some time. We both enjoyed the experience and we ended up pretty much going together for a number of months. We both moved on in other directions but we still stay in touch. Mrs Lickit

**Realist** · Dec 11, 2009, 9:50 AM

Recently discussed this with a married female friend, who's been in the closet forever. (She used to sleep with an old GF, who in the heat of passion, told me. I've kept her secret for years, but she knows I know)

Anyway, I asked her how she began. She said that a neighborhood girl seduced her when she was 12. The neighbor was 13. By the time her seducer was 14, she had bedded every girl in her neighborhood! She was devastated when she found out she was not her one true love; she though the neighbor was only with her.

As I did, she had to deal with the guilt and trauma of having such a clandestine desire. She fought it for years...we both are from very conservative, intolerant backgrounds. She has now resigned herself to her role as a mother, grandmother, and wife, and says she will not be with a woman again.

She succumbed to temptation in college, then again with my old GF. She hasn't been with another lady for years, now, but says the desire has rarely left her mind. She loves her husband, who is a really nice guy, but there's never been the passion she felt with her female lovers.