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  1. #1

    Talking Wanting to try BI

    I have been wanting to try bi now for over a year but I am really nervous about. I am not sure I want to trust someone I meet online it might just be me but can anyone help me out.

  2. #2

    Re: Wanting to try BI

    I would recommend finding someone NOT online, you know? Or, at least meet a few times, see how you "click" and just go from there.
    I met my g/f two years ago thru the guy she married. We swing, and it's all great. everyone knows it's fun time. I love that girl so much, but at the same time we are friends and we both have a man in our lives.
    Take your time and the right person will come along.

  3. #3

    Question Is bisexuality a fetish?

    I have been wondering if bisexuality could be a fetish? I am a bimale and I think of myself as having a "preference" or maybe even a (shudder) lifestyle, but not a fetish. Yet I heard a definition of fetish that makes me think it may be... A psychologist defined fetish as a way to make sexual gratification impersonal, thereby turning it in to a more self-centered activity. I have wondered if I simple have a cock fetish? A lot of guys post ads and are just looking to get someone off or fuck someone or suck a cock and then get out. I know I have thought like this at times... and while I am not looking for a boyfriend, I don't think that is want I want either... at least not all the time (I have had a couple of group experiences that were pretty amazing and I don't think I would turn that down).

    What do you think? or ?

  4. #4

    Re: Wanting to try BI

    Quote Originally Posted by mm6ce99 View Post
    I have been wanting to try bi now for over a year but I am really nervous about. I am not sure I want to trust someone I meet online it might just be me but can anyone help me out.
    Just for the record, I think being 'bi' is what you are, but you can't have 'bi sex'. You either have straight sex or (horrors!) gay sex. Only exception, I suppose, is having sex with a man and a woman at the same time -- though even that is just having straight and gay sex at the same time. Sorry for the pedantry -- I just think that self-acceptance includes something like "Yup, I like gay sex, and straight sex too; you see, I'm bi".

  5. #5

    Re: Wanting to try BI

    Go to a gay/mixed crowd bar/club or find a boyfriend/man to date.

  6. #6

    Re: Wanting to try BI

    I had a friend and we were drinking one night when one of us suggested strip poker. He lost and sucked me. I then sucked him. We sucked each other for a couple of years after that. I dont mean to promote alcohol but it does loosen you up and make it easier to try things you may want to do but wont do sober. I thing most guys want to suck a cock but are afraid. Have a couple of drinks with a friend and see what happens.

  7. #7

    Re: Wanting to try BI

    Meeting people takes time and meeting people you trust definitely takes time. I think you are on the right track to wait for someone you trust. It may awhile but a positive experience is worth the wait. In addition be sure to be safe(use protection).

    Best wishes to you in your exploration!
    hugs,
    Last edited by kitten; Aug 13, 2007 at 4:11 AM. Reason: mispell
    Kitten
    The smallest feline is a masterpiece. -Leonardo DaVinci

  8. #8

    Re: Wanting to try BI

    I have met all of my bi friends and sex partners on line. I chat quite a bit first, then arrange a meeting with the understanding that it may or may not lead to sex. My first meeting was with a man who was also a bi virgin. We both loved it, tho it didn't lead to anything long term (he was looking for more than I cld give since I am married) The sex was great, tho he was so excited he came almost the instant I took his cock in my mouth. I found myself amazingly comfortable sucking as well as being sucked. it seemed to be completley natural; just something that had been missing from my life

  9. #9

    Re: Wanting to try BI

    I would not suggest you approach a friend about trying bi sex unless you don’t mind being outed by someone. You never know how homophobic another person may be, not everyone is open about there phobias.
    I have met several people on line and have had relationships that have lasted for a while. Not everyone you meet on line is going to be a match. Be careful of people who don’t answer your questions or who are not open about what they want. Above all meet at a public place with other people around before going someplace private and trust your instincts if it doesn’t seem right, get out.

  10. #10

    Re: Is bisexuality a fetish?

    Quote Originally Posted by dougbi View Post
    I have been wondering if bisexuality could be a fetish? I am a bimale and I think of myself as having a "preference" or maybe even a (shudder) lifestyle, but not a fetish. Yet I heard a definition of fetish that makes me think it may be... A psychologist defined fetish as a way to make sexual gratification impersonal, thereby turning it in to a more self-centered activity. I have wondered if I simple have a cock fetish? A lot of guys post ads and are just looking to get someone off or fuck someone or suck a cock and then get out. I know I have thought like this at times... and while I am not looking for a boyfriend, I don't think that is want I want either... at least not all the time (I have had a couple of group experiences that were pretty amazing and I don't think I would turn that down).

    What do you think? or ?


    ..............................fetish is when the item in question is required on/in the scene in order to attain sexual gratification. It can be a toy or a tool..
    Nah, Bi sex is more than fetish unless for year upon year there is no need for more than the singular activity.
    Some guys only ever suck cock,nothing else. Clothes on, no body sights or smells just an open fly.
    That would qualify.
    Many encounters offer the same head only scene, that is quite often self denial of their orientation. For most men the sex eventually goes further.

  11. #11

    Re: Wanting to try BI

    Quote Originally Posted by kenny View Post
    I had a friend and we were drinking one night when one of us suggested strip poker. He lost and sucked me. I then sucked him. We sucked each other for a couple of years after that. I dont mean to promote alcohol but it does loosen you up and make it easier to try things you may want to do but wont do sober. I thing most guys want to suck a cock but are afraid. Have a couple of drinks with a friend and see what happens.
    ............NO NO NO NO NO........................

    Never seduce a drunken straight guy.
    Good way to get the shit beaten out of you.

    We have spoken here of the fast drop in hormonal rush post orgasm.
    In a bad situation it can go horribly wrong.
    Many gay men have been hurt this way.

    Play safe.

  12. #12

    Re: Wanting to try BI

    I hope you can find someone who, like you, wants to try being bi. Take care and dont rush into anything. Maybe you already know someone- a mate perhaps- who may share the same secret fantasy. If so, get drunk etc, go camping- whatever- and see what happens. It worked for me (twice!) now I am lucky to have two mates to play with either individually or, as is now usually the case, at the same time. We are all married (happily) but love to meet up for a night of mmm fun whenever one of us has the house free.

    Good luck

  13. #13

    Re: Wanting to try BI

    Quote Originally Posted by wildgal70 View Post
    I would recommend finding someone NOT online, you know? Or, at least meet a few times, see how you "click" and just go from there.
    I met my g/f two years ago thru the guy she married. We swing, and it's all great. everyone knows it's fun time. I love that girl so much, but at the same time we are friends and we both have a man in our lives.
    Take your time and the right person will come along.
    Why not online? Just curious about your thoughts. I mean if there is not point in meeting people online, why even had ads on a site like this one?
    Proud of who I am.

  14. #14

    Re: Wanting to try BI

    I have only tried Bi once. It was with a guy I met online and we did meet the next day. I guess that would make it a gay exerience as it was just him and I but I think I was lucky. It could have easily turned out bad. we simply sucked each other off, in the woods no less, and then went about our lives. That was quite a while ago now and I think I really want to try it again but not sure how to go about it.

  15. #15

    Re: Wanting to try BI

    Quote Originally Posted by Johnny Reb View Post
    Why not online? Just curious about your thoughts. I mean if there is not point in meeting people online, why even had ads on a site like this one?
    I suppose you could go either way on this one.

    Some people are sincere (or at least more sincere than not) when they put together an on-line ad. Some people put in what they "would like to be" rather than what they are. And there are a few that outright lie. You run into this problem no matter what the gender/orientation of the other person.

    I have nothing against ads per se - but I don't think I would ever just arrange a meeting based on the ad alone. And certainly not a meeting at an unsafe venue. I think the answer to the question just rests on your comfort level.

  16. #16

    Re: Wanting to try BI

    Quote Originally Posted by ds6220 View Post
    I have only tried Bi once. It was with a guy I met online and we did meet the next day. I guess that would make it a gay exerience as it was just him and I but I think I was lucky. It could have easily turned out bad. we simply sucked each other off, in the woods no less, and then went about our lives. That was quite a while ago now and I think I really want to try it again but not sure how to go about it.
    I don't think 3 people have to be in bed to call it bisexualtiy. I have sex with Timmy and I have sex with Teresa. So to me that makes me bi tho i don't have sex with both at the same time!

  17. #17

    Re: Wanting to try BI

    I've chatted with a lot of people online. The one guy I've actually been with was someone i chatted with for quite a while. Neither one of us was in a hurry to do anything, so as we chatted and phoned, feeling each other out (in a figurative sense) we finally got together a few times for the literal "feeling each other out". Fun times, but all too few as I apparently enjoyed it much more than he, but hey, such is life. I'm currently in the same situation with another guy, mailing, and phoning, hoping to get together the more we find out about each other. Again, neither of us in a hurry, but anxious nonetheless. So, there's my take on the situation. I do agree about the friends you already know though, some things are best left unsaid, rather than have them get said at a most inopportune time. Best not to go swimming in the pond you fish from.
    The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

  18. #18
    LoveLion
    Guest

    Re: Wanting to try BI

    I am in a similar situation as you. Newly gay/bi and havent really had the chance to explore any. Id love to find some one who would safely and tenderly help me explore sexually where I wouldn't have to feel nervous (after getting to know eachother online first of course). Or I would love to meet some one in the same situation as me, a little unsure and looking to experiment risk free. But unfortunately when it comes to online, the only ones who have shown interest in me are kind of people who send me a message saying "wanna suck my cock?" before even telling me their name. I wouldnt put much faith in finding someone online. By all means keep an ad up just in case, out dont count on it and keep looking offline.

    PS. Too bad your not in my area

  19. #19

    Re: Is bisexuality a fetish?

    Quote Originally Posted by dougbi View Post
    I have been wondering if bisexuality could be a fetish? I am a bimale and I think of myself as having a "preference" or maybe even a (shudder) lifestyle, but not a fetish. Yet I heard a definition of fetish that makes me think it may be... A psychologist defined fetish as a way to make sexual gratification impersonal, thereby turning it in to a more self-centered activity. I have wondered if I simple have a cock fetish? A lot of guys post ads and are just looking to get someone off or fuck someone or suck a cock and then get out. I know I have thought like this at times... and while I am not looking for a boyfriend, I don't think that is want I want either... at least not all the time (I have had a couple of group experiences that were pretty amazing and I don't think I would turn that down).

    What do you think? or ?

    Coming from one who did psychotherapy for 30 years at the doctoral level I must say the term fetish is misused today, and perhaps always was. It referred to someone who "got off" with something impersonal such as a shoe or stocking. Speaking for myself, I think if your sexual object is a shoe or something like that, then surely there is something psychologically crooked behind that. On the other hand, male crossdressers routinely get excited when dressing in women's clothes, and I do not think that is a fetish in the classic sense. Crossdressers are virtually moving into a feminine personna for a time, and that is exciting to them. But I must also add that many crossdressers move into that personna without getting sexually aroused and without ever contemplating sex with a man. What you are experiencing, in my view, is not a fetish.

  20. #20

    Re: Wanting to try BI

    i think you will enjoy it. i found out that i was nervous but after the first time i was spoiled to anal sex. get out to a bar that is bi/gay and find someone that you dont know but maybe local that can be discreet in case you dont like it and want no part of it but i doubt that will happen. once you get a taste of bi sex, i think you will be just like myself, cant get it out of your system to suck or be sucked or anal sex. i will open up a whole new sex world for you...at least you will be twice as likey to pick up a date than a herto male.


    Quote Originally Posted by mm6ce99 View Post
    I have been wanting to try bi now for over a year but I am really nervous about. I am not sure I want to trust someone I meet online it might just be me but can anyone help me out.

  21. #21

    Re: Wanting to try BI

    Hmm. This thread was posted close to 4 years ago by mm6ce99. Yet it appears he is still active on this site. I would be curious to know if he ever did find that first time partner and if he liked it or not. Are you willing to describe your first time experience to the group?

    HJ

    Maxtor wrote:
    i think you will enjoy it.... it will open up a whole new sex world for you...at least you will be twice as likey to pick up a date than a herto male.


    Originally Posted by mm6ce99 on Aug 12, 2007:
    I have been wanting to try bi now for over a year but I am really nervous about. I am not sure I want to trust someone I meet online it might just be me but can anyone help me out.

 

 

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