Life's Most Em-Bi-rassing Moments...

[Sapphrodite]

Closeted Bi or Not, we all have them: that horrendously awkward moment when someone you know who doesnt know about your bi side waltzes in on you indulging in something that could be perceived as Bi, Gay or Pervy (and no, I'm not suggesting those words are synonymous, but overall, they should make for a more interesting thread).

Oh I've had a few em-bi-rassing moments, but the first one was about 5-6 years ago. A few years after I had discovered my bisexuality but hadnt done much about it, a friend of mine who runs a local bi-girls social group, www.bobw.ca, asked me help out as a trade show volunteer at this big sex convention here in Toronto called the Everything to Do With Sex Show. I was extremely hesitant, didnt work very far from it and it was a place where you could easily bump into straight friends, family or coworkers, as it's an adult show and not necessarily LGBT. But she easily convinced me to come anyway, saying Out of thousands of people there, who's gonna see you??

Those became famous last words when I barely got my foot in the door and my vendor's tag around my neck when my NEXT DOOR NEIGHBOUR walks by (remember I live about an hour away from Toronto). I was mortified and hid behind a huge rack of condoms while her and her beau strolled by. I was in total panic mode as I was extremely closeted and obviosuly didnt want my NEIGHBOURS knowing!!!!

I ran to the booth and basically hid behind sunglasses and my friend's coat for about 90 mins, before I finally felt like okay thank gawd they have to have left by now, after all I did see them right by the doors two hours ago. So I settled in and started being more social, answering frank questions about bisexuality and the group - in fact at one point we had quite a crowd gathered, and just as I'm chatting up this gal about the club, my neighbour walks right up to me out of nowhere and says "Hi!! I didnt know you were working here this weekend - what's your booth about???"

Needless to say I lied through my teeth and insisted that although I was working at this bi girls booth, it was my friend who needed my help and called in a favour, and that since I'm a big people's rights kinda gal, I said sure... And all the while, I'm trying desperately trying to ignore other people's questions, all the stuff that had my name on it, and the F+F porn playing on the video beside me. Honestly, I wanted the floor to open up to reveal a firey pit and swallow me!!! But she was cool about it and thank GAWD never said anything to any of my other neighbours (that I know of).....

From that day forward, I made sure that I had a set of "little white lies" prepared for any 'questionable' activities I may partake of in the future. May sound a bit devious, but if you dont want anyone to know what's in the closet, you may wanna hang a misleading sign...

Can't wait to hear your most em-BI-rassing moments ~ post away!!!!


(and dont worry, I still have more em-bi-rassing moments to post... )

[biwords]

But Sapphrodisiac, do you actually think she believed you?

My most em-bi-rassing moment was undoubtedly when my wife walked into my study where I'd left the bisex.com site up -- which, as you can imagine, led to an interesting discussion (I'd recently told her of an MM experience I'd had many years earlier, and was planning to come out to her as currently bi over the following couple of weeks, but alas! this accident deprived me of control over the time and place). God bless her, she took it beautifully.

[void()]

Not sure my few stories will count, but here goes anyway.

I once invited a male best friend over to spend a night. We were both around thirteen. He and I had been up most of the night talking about everything in general. Then he looks at me, "can I share the bed with you?" At the time he was on the hardwood floor. After a little more talking and some touching, hugging he looks at me "want to screw?"

The next morning, mom wanders into the room after having knocked. I had gotten half awake. It was all still a groggy haze to me. I was in his arms and had him in mine. It was pretty obvious we'd made love that night. Mom looked at him puzzled as he woke.

"The floor was too hard, we shared the bed." He said deftly and dumbly. Fortunately mom played dumb as well. She turned around and left us to wake up fully, mentioning something about breakfast.

Then once, my now wife and I were making love. The bed frame gave way under us, resulting in a loud crashing thud followed immediately by her and I laughing. Mom from her room across the hall "what happened? everyone alright?"

And I tell anyone honestly, I have this very odd thing about my mother. No, I don't want to bed her, far from it. The odd thing is if I cannot make love to you in front of her or in her presence, then I just won't make love to you. LOL

But, I've had an encounter with a guy in a situation that would have been quite more than em Bi rassing, if it were discovered. Suffice it to say we were both in a professional status. His even flirting with me would have brought serious implications. But, we managed to enjoy a great night of love and love making, despite having to do so extremely covertly.

And from this I learned that not all Muslim men are wretched pigs or demons that we are now ought to think. And I learned this well over 14 years ago, far before any of this fucked up shit of 9/11. But, i digress on that. Rather remember Red Hot Chili Peppers and the breakfast including locust the next morn with my lover.

Hm, as to embarrassing moments dealing with bisexuality there have been a few. One was telling mom. And she replies, "Well, I had my suspicions. Almost thought you were homosexual, but then you were into girls too, threw that notion off. Then you go off on your own, not concerned with either boys or girls, sort of made me wonder. But, I never asked, figured you would tell me."

Then, a lifelong friend couldn't let the idea I'm bi sink into his skull. His wife just laughed. "You've known him all your life and not known? Hell, I knew him five minutes and knew, even without him saying a damn thing." And to my friends credit, he rebutted the fact he had missed every single subtle hint I'd given in all the time I knew him.

We're still friends, I guess. Though I've been away from home for about ten years, everyone is a total stranger to me and I they. Well, I better dash off.

--- --- -- -- - -

Run it slow.

[HighEnergy]

Well, it's not a bi moment, but I ran into my priest in an adult book/toy store. I already knew he was gay, but he was still floored when I noted we were purchasing very similar dildos. For those wondering about the priest reference, I'm an Episcopalian on this side of the pond, or an Anglican Catholic for those from the other side of the pond.

[Bisexualnewbie]

Hi there, I have an embarrassing story only its not a Bi story but I'll post it anyway.
When I was about 22 I was engaged to a girl in England and was living with her and her mom and dad. Well we both slept in the same bed in a bedroom above the living room, one day her mom came to me and said "Andy I need to ask you about you both going to bed before me and dad and I know what you youngsters are doing, well the bed squeaks and I'm sure that dad can hear it but has not said anything yet". Well with that I went to bed that night and said to my girlfriend when it was time for sex, "what should we do?, I know we can lay the comforter on the floor and do it on that?" so thats what we did. The next morning her mom came to me and said "Hey Andy the floor creaks too!!!"
I have never lived that story down and thought I would share.

[biwords]

[QUOTE=void_dweller] And from this I learned that not all Muslim men are wretched pigs or demons that we are now ought [taught?] to think. /QUOTE]

Who's teaching this? But your language is interesting, since it's the Koran that speaks of Jews being turned into "pigs and monkeys".

[Sapphrodite]

Oh I have LOTS and LOTS of em-BI-rassing moments!!!

I went into a XXX movie and toy shop once and lo-and-behold, a woman was actually working behind the counter!! Being recently aware of my bisexuality, I was still pretty green and hadnt really met up with any women in-person yet. When I got up the nerve to ask her about movies and such, she was very friendly and helpful, wandering about helping me find good F+F porn. BTW, this was the person who first acquainted me with the "Shane's Slumber Party" series (I *highly* recommend it as top-notch, 'not fake' F+F Porn).

I was sooo giggy and excited about the entire experience, but when I got home, I was... OMG - was she was hitting on me and I was just too stupid to recognize it?!?!? I bit my nails and paced, thinking I had missed my first opportunity of talking to another bi-woman openly, and I had thought she was attractive from the moment I entered the shop.

I decided not to let the moment pass me by thinking too much and whipped the sales receipt out of the bag and promptly called the store back. When I got her on the phone, I told her that I had noticed her right off and that I was interested in women, if she would like to get coffee sometime. She was extremely gracious, stating that although she was flattered, she wasnt so inclined, and that she had *just* been married two weeks before.

Well that explained the silly grin on her face, but needless to say I shopped at the XXX store across town for months cause I was sooo embarassed I might run into her again.

(yes, I can keep posting more awkward stuff about myself, but hopefuly I'm not the only em-BI-rassed person left out in the world!!!

[DiamondDog]

I got really drunk on beer, rum, and cider and told hetero male guys and total strangers about having sex with and picking up men and women and doing erotic SM in the form of flogging/paddling/spanking/using a crop with the men and women.

That's not embarassing though as I often get drunk and spank these hetero male acquaitances in public. <EG>

[biwords]

...I often get drunk and spank these hetero male acquaitances in public. <EG>

Hetero male acquaintances who like to be spanked by a guy? Hmmmm.....

[my-00-stang]

ok mine was when i was about 15 and my best friend was spending the night. we had been active since about 13 yrs ols, we were in my room i was on my back and he was deep in my ass when my sister walked in. all we could do was freeze...............she just looked said oops sorry to interupt walked through and into her room and closed the door. needless to say we were both to scared to finish. but the next day she told us both that it was okay because she was bi as well. that made it much easier to look her in the face from then on.

[the mage]

Gawd damn that priests face turned red...


hehehehe....

[HighEnergy]

Gawd damn that priests face turned red...


hehehehe....

Yes, but confession got really interesting after that! No seriously, we have a very special relationship and can talk about anything now! I'm very glad to have him in my life.

[anne27]

My overall most embarassing sex story happened right after I got married. I was still in school and we stayed with my parents. We had sex one afternoon and I guess I got a little carried away. When my hubby left my bedroom, my mom tossed a pair of rolled up socks at him.
"Next time put those in her mouth. The neighbors a block away could hear her!"
My mom had an odd sense of humor.

On the bi side, I guess the worst thing was when my hubby walked in on me having phone sex with my girlfriend. He just stood and watched until I threw something at him!

[Duneman69]

I was getting it on in the dunes behind the beach (did that a lot, hence the name) with a couple I'd met there. The wife wanted me to wear a condom which we'd left with the clothes out on the beach.

Nobody was around so I walked out to the clothes nude. While I was crouched down searching for the condoms, I failed to notice the cop that had driven up behind me. Worse than that, he KNEW me.

But, he was cool and seeing a bikini top among the clothes on the sand, he just warned me to be more careful and he drove off.

[CuddlyKate]

The subject of Edinburgh being laid back about gay and bisexuality is an argument Frances and I have had for a long time. I am not quite so outgoing as she is, and am much more easily intimidated by prejudice which is why I have never been quite so open about my sexuality as she. It is not a haven of bigotry before she jumps down my throat, but it can be a very unpleasant place at times if there are bigots within a mile of you. Like most of the UK it has made huge strides in the last 40 years, but there are many who simply will have no truck with the likes of us. Much of that bigotry comes from the gay and lesbian community many of whom have no tolerance for bisexuals in any way. Some of them even have none for their own kind, especially gay men.

When I met Frances I was scared stiff of revealing my sexuality to the world but she showed me a side of human nature and of Edinburgh I had no idea existed and shall always be grateful to her for that. But while our home town is lovely and friendly city it has a dark side which is quite loathesome. While it is fun and exciting it is also very scary indeed if you do not fit into what is considered the norm.

Please dont let anything Ive said put you off. Frances knows the dark side of Edinburgh, but is much less wary of it than me. I am far from in the closet, but my private life is my own, and as far as I can, considering who I live with I like to keep it that way.

[CuddlyKate]

Oh dear. Hows this for embarrassing. I have posted it in the wrong thread. God help me when she sees this.

[TashaSW]

Oh dear. Hows this for embarrassing. I have posted it in the wrong thread. God help me when she sees this.

Happens to everyone Kate I personally have posted the wrong comments in the wrong chat box on MSN
It can be embarressing lol Especially when your talking about one thing to someone that the other person your talking to has no interest in ever talking about.

[darkeyes]

Oh dear. Hows this for embarrassing. I have posted it in the wrong thread. God help me when she sees this.

Ya daft cow!!!! tee hee. Ya dus gimme a laff sumtimes!

[donttellnehismy]

My most em bi rassing moment was when I was younger we'll say. My bff/lover and I were giving each other head on the side of my house when a group of girls caught us and laughed.

[bigal5050]

i guess mine was while in the abs I was on my knees sucking this nice cock when the door was yanked open (wasn't latched all the way) this guy stood there watching so I kept on sucking lol took his load on my face, then it was the watchers turn interesting day

[melbcuteboi]

In dot points some of the many incidents ive had are:
* Sucking best mate off which was only my second same sex encounter and within 5mins there was a knock on the window "what are you boys doing in there?" I hear with my face buried on his cock.
* Meeting up with a random meetup in a car park and its one of your employees who you actually dont get along with at all.. Ends up being first time i fuck a guy.
* Being fucked by two men in an ibiza bath house/bar while everyone watched speaking in spanish.
* Being caught by my sister having her panties in my drawer
* Wife finding photos on tablet of me in panties ect..

Theres plenty more but that enough for now

[querty]

Well it's not "bi" embarrassing, but;
My High school girlfriend was a horny horny gal. I lived at home at the time and we decided to sneak upstairs and have some fun. Well apparently we got carried away as we usually do. I heard some creaking outside the door, but dismissed it. We came down stairs after a bit and there was MOM! Waiting patently. I took my GF home (whom was so embarrassed she didn't come over for weeks). I came home and settled in for the 1 hour parental lecture. I think the only thing that saved me from worse was that I was able to truthfully assure her I was using condoms and she was on the pill.

[19biman61]

I hadn't got around to telling my girlfriend that I'm Bi when she found my stash of women's underwear, pantyhose and thigh highs. She was upset because she thought they belonged to another woman. I told her about my bisexuality and my penchant for cross dressing. I don't cross dress anymore and we are still together.

[julyguybill]

I had met a new friend we went for a drive went to a roadside park on top oh a hill .I was sucking him had been for 15 minutes he came in my mouth I raised up my head from his cock mouth full a US Border patrol was there looking at us he ask do you think you are doing here

[cuttin2dachase]

I keep my closeted bi side completely separate from my straight life. It would shock and hurt my family if I came out or if they accidentally discovered. I think most of my straight friends would probably shun me. However if any of my str8 male buds found out and in turn admitted they too were bi and closeted, I would be able to take them into my confidence and perhaps even become FWBs with them. I've had bi friends request me as a Facebook friend, but I've always declined them because I am very zealous about guarding my deliciously secret double life. One unintentional slip-up on mainstream social media can mean that the whole world knows I'm bisexual.

That being said, I once met a man online, we chatted a week or two, struck up a friendship and decided to meet for a drink and play at my place if we hit it off. He turned out to be a guy I had worked with who had been laid off from my company several months before. I don't scope out men or feel attraction to men in everyday life, and have almost no gaydar. I only seek men online and only feel attracted to men I know are bi or curious and who show a sexual interest in me. I never was attracted to this guy at work although he was (is) a very handsome guy. The conversation was awkward at first and I felt exposed and nervous. He immediately put my fears and "em-bi-rrasment" to rest by assuring me of his discretion. He pointed out that he was married (I was permanently separated from 2nd wife as I still am). He further said he too was very closeted and had more to lose than I did if anyone else knew. After we finished our beers after he winked and said let's go get naked. We went to my place and had a great time. We repeated our fun a few times until his wife became suspicious and he had to stop seeing me.

Another time, I ran into a very attractive married couple at a bar, the same bar where 1st wife and I had met them originally. We'd had two 4somes with them and all the play was straight swapping with no bi play. We ran in the same young barhopping, party-all-the-time circles of friends and casual friends. At that time I was separated and divorcing my 1st wife. It soon became apparent they were on the make for a man for a 3some. He went to the restroom and she asked me out of the blue if I was bisexual. My first thought was to say no because they might be looking for straight men only or they could be homophobes who might out me to mutual friends. But I decided to risk "em-bi-rrassment". I told her yes I was orally bi and would enjoy playing with both of them. She smiled and said "Great !" As it turned out they were both bi and she enjoyed watching him with other men and being shared by him with other men. We had a very hot 3some at their home that night. Other than online, that was the only time I have ever been asked point blank if I was bi.

I have had scares and close calls at home and at work when I dumbassedly failed to log out of explicit emails, live chats, mm chatrooms, mm hookup sites etc. I have had to practically run past people and dive in front of the monitor and quickly hit the sleep key to avert or prevent family, str8 friends and co-workers from seeing what was on the screen. I have a cover story made up if anyone ever does happen to see any of mm or bi sites open on my computer or phone. I will say that I keep getting spam emails from individuals on porn and adult sites and that I am trying to find a way to block them or unsubscribe from their emails LOL

[pole_smoker]

I keep my closeted bi side completely separate from my straight life. It would shock and hurt my family if I came out or if they accidentally discovered. I think most of my straight friends would probably shun me. However if any of my str8 male buds found out and in turn admitted they too were bi and closeted, I would be able to take them into my confidence and perhaps even become FWBs with them. I've had bi friends request me as a Facebook friend, but I've always declined them because I am very zealous about guarding my deliciously secret double life. One unintentional slip-up on mainstream social media can mean that the whole world knows I'm bisexual.

That being said, I once met a man online, we chatted a week or two, struck up a friendship and decided to meet for a drink and play at my place if we hit it off. He turned out to be a guy I had worked with who had been laid off from my company several months before. I don't scope out men or feel attraction to men in everyday life, and have almost no gaydar. I only seek men online and only feel attracted to men I know are bi or curious and who show a sexual interest in me. I never was attracted to this guy at work although he was (is) a very handsome guy. The conversation was awkward at first and I felt exposed and nervous. He immediately put my fears and "em-bi-rrasment" to rest by assuring me of his discretion. He pointed out that he was married (I was permanently separated from 2nd wife as I still am). He further said he too was very closeted and had more to lose than I did if anyone else knew. After we finished our beers after he winked and said let's go get naked. We went to my place and had a great time. We repeated our fun a few times until his wife became suspicious and he had to stop seeing me.

Another time, I ran into a very attractive married couple at a bar, the same bar where 1st wife and I had met them originally. We'd had two 4somes with them and all the play was straight swapping with no bi play. We ran in the same young barhopping, party-all-the-time circles of friends and casual friends. At that time I was separated and divorcing my 1st wife. It soon became apparent they were on the make for a man for a 3some. He went to the restroom and she asked me out of the blue if I was bisexual. My first thought was to say no because they might be looking for straight men only or they could be homophobes who might out me to mutual friends. But I decided to risk "em-bi-rrassment". I told her yes I was orally bi and would enjoy playing with both of them. She smiled and said "Great !" As it turned out they were both bi and she enjoyed watching him with other men and being shared by him with other men. We had a very hot 3some at their home that night. Other than online, that was the only time I have ever been asked point blank if I was bi.

I have had scares and close calls at home and at work when I dumbassedly failed to log out of explicit emails, live chats, mm chatrooms, mm hookup sites etc. I have had to practically run past people and dive in front of the monitor and quickly hit the sleep key to avert or prevent family, str8 friends and co-workers from seeing what was on the screen. I have a cover story made up if anyone ever does happen to see any of mm or bi sites open on my computer or phone. I will say that I keep getting spam emails from individuals on porn and adult sites and that I am trying to find a way to block them or unsubscribe from their emails LOL

Your friends, family members, co-workers, and ex-wives already know you are bisexual, but they wonder why you are so uptight, ashamed, and embarrassed about being bisexual, and think it is silly of you to be so closeted and pretend you are hetero when they all know the truth that you are not.

[cuttin2dachase]

I see that the CEO of the firm of D*ckhead, F*ckwad and Idiot, Inc. has chimed in on my post. He's on my ignore so I didn't have to read it. Someone (other than those on my ignore list) tell me if I'm right. I'm guessing that he's attacked me, belittled me and demonstrated his ignorance and low self esteem along with his self-righteous, sociopathic mania again, hasn't he?

[querty]

Nah, He was probably attacking me for some common sense thing I said in some other thread. Probably off his meds again

[pole_smoker]

Nah, He was probably attacking me for some common sense thing I said in some other thread. Probably off his meds again

I am not attacking anyone. I am simply writing that it's silly for people to stay closeted as bi when their family, friends, and co-workers all know that they are not heterosexual.

I don't take meds as there is no need for them. As for querty posting anything remotely intelligent, coherent, or dealing with common sense I have yet to read it.

[jem_is_bi]

[QUOTE=pole_smoker;289314] I am not attacking anyone. I am simply writing that it's silly for people to stay closeted as bi when their family, friends, and co-workers all know that they are not heterosexual.
QUOTE]
While you are probably right.There are a lot of friends, family, others who know that want to be treated by us like they don’t know.