Bisexual men and cross-dressing

[jeancarleo]

As I read thru the posts I began to wonder what came first - being Bi or Cross Dressing and then being aroused by playing the female role sexually? I have heard of guys who like to dress but are reluctant to act out sexually with a man, but after the first time, they can't get enough.

I maybe like that. I have only dressed in lingerie at times - silky hose, panties, a slip, some lipstick and then I am really turned on about having sex with a man.

So what do you think, what comes first - being Bi or being a Cross Dresser?
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Mike

Of course being biexual came first. I believe all humans are born bisexuals, some evolve more of it than others. I have never dressed up as a girl but have only thought of doing it for halloween last year but was too scared because I would probably get beat up after work since i had to work that day but i could dress up for work or i was also scared if i got picked up or kidnapped after work, lol! Oh the drama I would try it on a halloween day i don't work or for a cd only party. I think it would be fun.

The only make up I ever did used was acne medicine that looks like make up but I only used it once and wasn't very happy cuz i got people staring at my face so I was going to college and as soon as I got there went to the WC and washed up and got rid of that acne medicine.

[TaylorMade]

Yeah. For me, that goes beyond sexuality even. I mean genderfuck means why can't a guy cry at a movie or like flowers or a gal like heavy metal or martial arts, without getting shit? Actually, labelfuck is more like it. I appreciate people who share that with me.

I think you'll appreciate this...

My former voice teacher labeled me "the Exception". She said most people, when they take formal voice training, expand their range upward.

I didn't. I expanded my range downward, inching toward tenor. When she said that, I felt so proud I could burst.

*Taylor*

[Azrael]

I think genderfuck is sexy. Really, isn't a strap-on is kinda like female drag? lol.

For me, the CD thing is tied in a lot to with a dom/sub rough sex thing. Being a little slut whore for a top guy or a strap-on gal. It's only an occasional fantasy, though. Not an everyday thing. I like the younger CDs who look good doing it, like this:

Not the guys who look like Chris Farley in a wig with lipstick.

Jesus Tap-dancing Christ that's hot *adjusts self*

[ziggybabie]

I think you'll appreciate this...

My former voice teacher labeled me "the Exception". She said most people, when they take formal voice training, expand their range upward.

I didn't. I expanded my range downward, inching toward tenor. When she said that, I felt so proud I could burst.

*Taylor*

As in downward like lower pitch or deeper voice? I really have no knowledge of that kind of thing. You'll have to excuse me. *blushes in embarassment*

[diB4u]

For the ones who dont know what the term "gender fuck" is...

dabbling in the typical gender roles and sexual identities to include the following- drag queens, drag kings, cross dressers, and of course transgenders.

Gender benders also fit nicely into the termonology.

Genderqueer or intergender is a catchall term for gender identities other than masculine or feminine. People who identify as genderqueer may think of themselves as being both masculine and feminine, as being neither masculine nor feminine, as having a combination of masculine and feminine personality characteristics, or as falling completely outside the gender binary. (taken from wikipedia)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Genderqueer


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Genderfuck


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boi_%28gender%29

[dportrait]

This is an interesting topic for me... I have always known I was bi (since I was interested in sex anyway) but until recently would have said I wasn't interested in crossdressers....

However I now find the man in my life happens to be a CD... and its great! I love helping find outfits etc... its like having a 2nd girlfriend lol. Theres so much more available for females to wear ;-)

Its been an education, especially seeing ladies come and chat him up...

[BreeIsMe]

I think cross-dressing is completely different from bisexual, etc.

Cross-dressers get sexual excitement out of wearing women's clothes. This is often confused with transgendered people as well.
With transgendered people, we do NOT cross-dress since we identify with the sex that we dress as. AND we are not "excited" (at least sexually) by dressing. I actually feel calm, comfortable, NORMAL and HAPPY. when dressed as a male, I feel uncomfortable. That is NOT what cross-dressers feel.


To me bisexuality is also different but of course there are bisexual cross-dressers. Generally the two aren't even related....

Bree

[Delilah]

I'm a Transgendered Woman (Non op Transsexual) and I never cross dress at anytime before transitioning. The day I have discovered myself is the day Delilah was born instantly.
I don't get aroused wearing any women's attire. I get aroused smelling a man's sporty calogne...lol But anyways, I don't have any sexual urges to get off on women's attire. When I get home from work, I can't wait to rip of my panty hose...lol You can see a trail of clothing from the front door to my bedroom (of course I pick them up, silly).

[Delilah]

I think cross-dressing is completely different from bisexual, etc.

Cross-dressers get sexual excitement out of wearing women's clothes. This is often confused with transgendered people as well.
With transgendered people, we do NOT cross-dress since we identify with the sex that we dress as. AND we are not "excited" (at least sexually) by dressing. I actually feel calm, comfortable, NORMAL and HAPPY. when dressed as a male, I feel uncomfortable. That is NOT what cross-dressers feel.


To me bisexuality is also different but of course there are bisexual cross-dressers. Generally the two aren't even related....

Bree

Tell it like it is sister! lol Some of these people need education and terminology corrections....lol

[Bluebiyou]

Nope, no cross dressing jollies. I'm male.
One time many years ago my wife put on my underwear and I put her panties on in humor, but it didn't do a sexual thing for me. It was just funny at the moment.

[stec16]

It does it for me. I am typing this wearing my brand new black lacy suspender belt and matching thong with black stockings that arrived today. I can't stop feeling the material. It feels great on my penis. I started a thread called "Christmas stocking" when i first started considering buying underware but i only had 2 replies. This will not be my last underware set.

[wanderingrichard]

On some other sites I visit it seems a large percentage of men who identify themselves as bisexual are into cross-dressing, whether limited to wearing women's panties or full female dress.

What I'm wondering is how common cross-dressing actually is, both for men who otherwise identify as straight, and those who identify as bi?

hmmm.. seems like, last count, i know personally about 6 CD guys.. and only 2 of them identify as bisexual...the rest, as i've read thru here it's been explained quite well, all just love wearing womens clothing to one degree or another....

trans gendered folk? maybe i know like another 6 or so, and only 1 has ever claimed to be bisexual.. the others, all felt they were in the wrong body...and most likely were/are...

like i said way back when...treat them as the person and gender they identify as and everyone will be a whole lot happier....

[dportrait]

hmmm.. seems like, last count, i know personally about 6 CD guys.. and only 2 of them identify as bisexual...the rest, as i've read thru here it's been explained quite well, all just love wearing womens clothing to one degree or another....

trans gendered folk? maybe i know like another 6 or so, and only 1 has ever claimed to be bisexual.. the others, all felt they were in the wrong body...and most likely were/are...

like i said way back when...treat them as the person and gender they identify as and everyone will be a whole lot happier....

Cd vs Tg - I dont think the line is that clear.... I have talked to quite a few people in this category and even they can't agree 100% on a definition...

All the CDs I know I would consider bi - they are men who enjoy sexual activities with other men. You are correct however in saying that many don't consider themselves bi. There may well be straight CDs but I am yet to meet one...

Each person has their own ideas on being Cd/Tg - much the same as bi's vary widely in their preferences and opinions.

In the end as yuo said getting to know the person is far more important than any label they or anyone else may apply

[BreeIsMe]

Cd vs Tg - I dont think the line is that clear.... I have talked to quite a few people in this category and even they can't agree 100% on a definition...

All the CDs I know I would consider bi - they are men who enjoy sexual activities with other men. You are correct however in saying that many don't consider themselves bi. There may well be straight CDs but I am yet to meet one...

Each person has their own ideas on being Cd/Tg - much the same as bi's vary widely in their preferences and opinions.

In the end as yuo said getting to know the person is far more important than any label they or anyone else may apply

I agree that labels (as always) never accurately reflect the people they are applied to. Some people identify as being BOTH male AND female or at least partially and they may cross-dress. However, they are usually happy with being either sex inwardly or outwardly. But, I believe that TG refers to people who specifically feel that their 'assigned' sex does not match their inner sex and seek to change the outward to match the inward. They do NOT cross-dress but dress appropriate for their gender identity... That is why I believe that while they are often lumped together, they are actually completely different phenomena...

my

Bree

[Spruceman3]

I am definitely into cross dressing, and of course, am Bi as well. I don't think Bi and CD go together as some CD's are not bi. Love the pantyhose.

[tomtommylee]

Good question. I had a fellow ask me to dress for him so I wore a pair of black pantyhose red nightgown and red panties. His eyes about fell out..He got what he wanted but had to work for it

[DiamondDog]

Seeing men in drag doesn't do much for me.

I know it's based on theater and camp humor but it doesn't do anything for me sexually.

I've put makeup on but that was for halloween costumes and for acting in plays.

I don't have a problem with men dressing in femme drag but it's not something that I personally want to do.

If I were with a guy and during an SM scene he wanted me to humilate him by "forcing" him to put on women's clothing/panties/heavy drag while I gave him sensations I'd think about doing forced feminization to him but I wouldn't want to call him a woman's name, refer to him as a woman just because he's in heavy femme drag, and I wouldn't want to do this all the time to someone.

I'm more into the idea of women dressing up in men's clothing.

A gay friend of mine told me how he once went home with a hot guy and the guy said, "Oh let me freshen up a bit in the bathroom."

My friend waited, and the guy he went home with came out wearing a dress!

My friend didn't expect this, said, "Sorry but you killed it. There's no sense in me sticking around.", and went home.

[funsex]

I may be like Mike as well as i do enjoy hose, and it makes me feel fem and want cock

[wutheringheights]

I've actually done drag-work semi-professionally and really enjoyed the entire ritual. Cross-dressing can be carried out with a diversity of intentions. There are those who feel a significant sexual change or satisfaction associated with particular clothing; there are those who use it to parody the general issue of gender and sexual 'difference'; there are those who simply enjoy certain kinds of makeup and clothing that are conventionally reserved for the other sex. Personally, I'd love people to be able to wear/not wear makeup or various articles of clothing depending upon their own aesthetic tastes as opposed to generalized cultural prescription.... but then, in many ways, we wear clothes in the first place due to cultural convention. How about one big wide naked world!.... and with a little makeup maybe.

[12voltman59]

For me----I have absolutely zero interest in cross dressing in any form--not that my view is any sort of knock against those who do like it---it is just that I simply have no interest in it at all---it takes all kinds to make the world go 'round and whatever floats your boat---more power to ya--play safe and have fun!!!!!

[amber_cd]

First, I believe that there is a big difference between cd's and transgender women/men as cd's don't have a need or want to change their gender. They're not transgendered but only expressing another side of themselves, however strong a feeling that may be.

I'm a cd and quite happy being a man. But I have always had a very strong feminine side; I remember I had a crossdressing dream when I was only 3 or 4. Ever since, it's been a part of me, although there were significant amounts of time when I didn't acknowledge it, but only becasue I didn't need to. When I was 12 or so, I started dressing again and have ever since. Now I find I dress for different reasons. I mainly do it because I want to feel feminine and sexy with no sexual overtones. Other times it does have the fetish effect of sexual excitement. But it's all about the context in which I'm doing it, how I feel, and what I want at the time.

I was dressing before I ever began to think of men as potential sexual partners, and I don't think my dressing led to it. It evolved separately, albeit not in a vacuum. Most of the time I prefer to be dressed if I'm with a guy, but it really all depends on the situation. Sometimes it not possible...and that's OK, I can keep that image to myself and still get the same overall effect, if I want. Whether I'm dressed or not, I can still view myself as femme in those situations, if I want to. But even then, I'm an aggressive femme. But sometimes it's just nice for good old man-on-man sex.

So, no I don't believe that all cd's are bi or that all bi guys have to have a femme side. They are two completely separate concepts. But I think a lot of men, straight, bi, or gay are open to it some form or another.

[amber_cd]

First, I believe that there is a big difference between cd's and transgender women/men as cd's don't have a need or want to change their gender. They're not transgendered but only expressing another side of themselves, however strong a feeling that may be.

I'm a cd and quite happy being a man. But I have always had a very strong feminine side; I remember I had a crossdressing dream when I was only 3 or 4. Ever since, it's been a part of me, although there were significant amounts of time when I didn't acknowledge it, but only becasue I didn't need to. When I was 12 or so, I started dressing again and have ever since. Now I find I dress for different reasons. I mainly do it because I want to feel feminine and sexy with no sexual overtones. Other times it does have the fetish effect of sexual excitement. But it's all about the context in which I'm doing it, how I feel, and what I want at the time.

I was dressing before I ever began to think of men as potential sexual partners, and I don't think my dressing led to it. It evolved separately, albeit not in a vacuum. Most of the time I prefer to be dressed if I'm with a guy, but it really all depends on the situation. Sometimes it not possible...and that's OK, I can keep that image to myself and still get the same overall effect, if I want. Whether I'm dressed or not, I can still view myself as femme in those situations, if I want to. But even then, I'm an aggressive femme. But sometimes it's just nice for good old man-on-man sex.

So, no I don't believe that all cd's are bi or that all bi guys have to have a femme side. They are two completely separate concepts. But I think a lot of men, straight, bi, or gay are open to it some form or another.

[the mage]

So many variations, so little time...

Bi, and gender bending and the clothing that goes with it is all wonderfully tied together for most of us it seems.

DD (yes, not ZP) made me chuckle with his story..
I had a "top" wanted me to wear my Lady's panties, fine, I can do that, but within 10 minutes the "top" is laying down self stroking telling me how he loves to see "Big black cocks, 3 of them, fucking my wife hard" While he watches...

Ahem...some "top"...

A lot of self confusion goes with the basic premise of being willing to submit sexually..

[lovesex86]

I have a couple pairs of panties, and I love wearing them! I found both of them, used, which adds excitement by wondering what the pussy looked like that was touching these panties!

[lovesex86]

Seeing men in drag doesn't do much for me.

I know it's based on theater and camp humor but it doesn't do anything for me sexually.

I've put makeup on but that was for halloween costumes and for acting in plays.

I don't have a problem with men dressing in femme drag but it's not something that I personally want to do.

If I were with a guy and during an SM scene he wanted me to humilate him by "forcing" him to put on women's clothing/panties/heavy drag while I gave him sensations I'd think about doing forced feminization to him but I wouldn't want to call him a woman's name, refer to him as a woman just because he's in heavy femme drag, and I wouldn't want to do this all the time to someone.

I'm more into the idea of women dressing up in men's clothing.

A gay friend of mine told me how he once went home with a hot guy and the guy said, "Oh let me freshen up a bit in the bathroom."

My friend waited, and the guy he went home with came out wearing a dress!

My friend didn't expect this, said, "Sorry but you killed it. There's no sense in me sticking around.", and went home.

what does do anything for you...I used to respect you, but you are so judgemental know that it makes me sick!

[Lateralus]

what does do anything for you...I used to respect you, but you are so judgemental know that it makes me sick!

What did DiamondDog say to offend you? He was just stating his opinion.

Anyhow, I love androgyny. Something along the lines of old school Bowie or Grace Jones always gets me going. IMO, it takes a certain type of guy to look good cross-dressing.

[wutheringheights]

A lot of self confusion goes with the basic premise of being willing to submit sexually..

What could this sentence possibly mean?

[jttx3]

Well I can answer this in that I occasionally love to dress as a woman and go out and have fun on the town. I don't do it halfway though, panties or stockings don't do it exclusively, I like to be a woman somedays, part of the whole not identifying with one sex or the other and me being bisexual. I love that feeling of being a woman and being taken by men as a woman. But that being said, I am really in to men to men sex too so I just adjust to whomever I am with and their preferences and I am happy all around. I like having sex with men and whether it is my masculine or my feminine self, either way it's all good.

[jonibotom]

A few years ago my girlfriend put me into a pair of panties ( she knew what I needed beter than I did) I think it helped to bring out my bi and sub feelings, and it is great to secretly wear a lacy thong. Though panties is about as far as I go with cd.

[the mage]

What could this sentence possibly mean?

Many people, men in particular, cannot deal socially with the admission of sexual submission. Even though they'd love to try it, they don't know how to safely find it or experience it without a resulting life trauma.

Many women (not all) will lose all respect for their man if he were to admit to a desire to "bottom". It can cause love to die.

Power exchange is often a mis-understood thing .