Ideas on best way to offer a woman a three way

[Spiro]

I am a male, 58 and I have a very good friend who is a wonderful and beautiful woman. This woman, who I will call Jill, knows I am bi, and has known it for many years. She has just gone through a divorce and is now getting more active in the dating scene. She knows I have always had the hots for her and truly been in love with her for many years, and we have never had sex, not really.

we were talking and I offered to her a three way. I told her that if she did a three way with me, I would truly treat her wonderfully and the fact that she is beautiful and my dearest friend, I would work to make her have a supper great time in a three way. At first she put me off but said later that her current male friend may be interested in such a think. He is cute so it would be very nice to have this happen.

I said that if a 3 way happened it would all be about her, I am only interested in pleasing her, and really that is so true. She commented that she doubts that men really care about the woman in a thee way, but only their self interests, (ouch) I could not and would not lose focus on just how important she is to me and how hard I would work to make her happy.

So she said if I orchestrated it, maybe she would be ok.

So I am asking anyone who understands what she is going through and how I can make her happy. Because in the end that is all that matters. She likes sex (men only) and I bet would love to have two men worship her as she should be treated.

So please let me know your thoughts.

[void()]

Seems rather obvious to me. Follow through on what you told her. I feel & think again this is an example posting of "being willing to entertain opinions". And that to me reads as being an effort in trolling.

I mean honestly, if even the OP can state the solution up front, what rationale is there to post an inquiry? In this case the problem is Girl states objection to threesome being Guys focus on Guys only. The OP states he expressed to Girl he would offer due diligence in seeing that did not happen in this case. The solution which is obviously right there at hand is for the OP to in fact do what they said.

1. Problem / Thesis
2. Reaction / Antithesis
3. Solution / Synthesis

That is Hegelian Dialectic, something the Mafia, C.I.A, The Vatican, Nazis all have used or do still use. Once you are aware of it, then it becomes clear when people try setting up baited inquiries or statements. Being this obvious about it in public forums is really off putting. It presumes the poster as being superior to all others as they "entertain opinion". Not everyone desires being seen as master or slave. A third option exists, this option suggests all are equals.

I thought on a site such as this, all being equals was the case and manifesto. It seems that is not to be. We keep having immature people seeking to strut about like peacocks and trying to assert dominance worse than horny little first year pups. Grow up already.

Now, given that my cognitive reasoning at times is a bit off, I do apologize. I may have misread this and chose to present an issue where none existed. If that is so, again my apologies. I have doubts either way. Being human it is natural to doubt a bit. This doubt does not however paralyze me out of fear. I have courage, which paraphrasing Chief Red Cloud is "the ability to see something more important than the fear, set the fear aside". What is more important here? Communication.

That is why I also think the site needs stricter moderation. There should not be a need for me to doubt postings / posters as I have in this case. No one needs to deal with such a hassle. Years past I had as few as 1 user in ignore. Now, I am closer to a dozen. Either that one other user is using sock puppets, or there are more independent trolls visiting the site, or a third option - I am becoming more aware of my preference of not dealing with immature prattle as I grow older. In any case it seems rather telling that my ignore list has grown.

And Drew, if it is just a matter of you joking around in a means to say "well, we'll give you a hard time for free". Please do let us know that. That would be hilarious in my view but I am doubting that is the case either.

Again apologies if I have verily misread and dispersed an issue where none did exist.

P.S. And OP, I am in my mid forties. You are nearly two decades more experienced in living than I. It is not illogical to think one who is more experienced, would also not be more mature. Then, again I am not attempting to judge, only to present logical thought and expression of that. Some of still use critical thinking, despite thinking in general hurting. A good balm for that lies in common sense.

[Hypersexual11]

My wife and I have been in MANY mmf 3ways. We started it due to her generosity. She wanted me to explore both side of my sexuality at the same time and with her there. But that never happened to much extent. I would have some mm contact but the focus was always on her. It turned out that when she had 2 cocks, 2 mouths and 4 hands available to her, she became more turned on than I had ever seen, or that the guys we saw had ever seen. She always came easily, but with 2 guys, she would have times like in a dp where her orgasm just went on forever.

Planning one, especially the first, is tough. It would be best it just happened but you aren't spring chickens so a little prodding and planning is probably in order. I assume her assumption that the guys are just looking for a hole to pound in a 3way comes from watching porn, where the girl is not much more than prop. Actual 3ways may have porn-like sex, but everything is being done for the womans pleasure. Close watch is kept for signs of pain, discomfort, boredom. It is difficult to get a woman in bed with 2 guys. It's tougher to get them out. Good luck

[elian]

worse than horny little first year pups.

Oh come on now, don't make me horny like that!

One thing I have noticed in my travels is that while I am fairly confident in a lot of areas of my life, when it comes to relationships there are times when I revert back to a babbling child...I wonder if it could be the same thing with other guys, even if they are in their 50's ??

As a male, I don't have any perspective from her point of view, but women certainly do enjoy romance, pleasure and sex so I think there is a potential that she could enjoy herself quite a bit -if- she trusted each of you. For me, trust (or lack of it) is what ends up turning me back into a babbling, horny little pup..

By now I'm sure you know that real sex is not like a porno. If you all enjoy the romance more than the physical sex act, that you actually care for each other and want to share pleasure then I think you will be fine.

If you value the friendship, be sure that your friendship can tolerate this type of activity..you are all in uncharted territory - well, except for the many hundreds of thousands of swingers who have tried it before you who just don't talk about it in public.

[void()]

Oh come on now, don't make me horny like that!

One thing I have noticed in my travels is that while I am fairly confident in a lot of areas of my life, when it comes to relationships there are times when I revert back to a babbling child...I wonder if it could be the same thing with other guys, even if they are in their 50's ??

"Well shucks", thought you would enjoy a little teasing.

I considered what you expressed. More often than not, in what I have experienced here, it is case of the OP seeking the reaction as entertainment. I have become weary of being entertainment, at least in this form of context.

It is one thing to cut up and kid around. I comprehend what that entails. This which I expound on is different and it is not good natured, nor funny, enjoyable by a good number of people.

I digress for now though, expressing further exacerbates. Am glad to see you. May need to get some more horny pups, or watch videos of construction crews putting fifty-eight feet of plumbing pipe into a building. *chuckles* "Hey, the carpenter needs more wood!" *smirking* And that is cutting up. See, I do know what it is.

[elian]

Well I had considered the idea that at least half of these threads are for the entertainment of the original posters. As cat said, it would be nice to see some posts about actual people instead of cum slut gangbangs every once in a while but only in some rare cases have I been truly offended by it (where it crosses into things like human subjugation and so forth.)

Am I gay, bisexual or bicurious - why yes, I am. Do I prefer ass or pussy? I like the whole person. Do I spit or swallow? Wouldn't you like to know...well the answer to that is that I don't give blowjobs to just anyone. Pegging? Fun, as long as the person doing the pegging isn't an asshole. Drinking cum? Maybe when I was a teen full of hormones but probably not any more. Threesomes? They can be a lot of fun, depending - but also very complicated. Poly relationships? With the right people, the right level of trust and the right resources to support and sustain each person. Trans folks? They don't hurt me, I know some males who have more nurturing energy and some females who have more masculine traits so I think it's a matter of finding the match for you, regardless of what is on the outside. Shaved or not? Shaved, usually - unless someone absolutely feels naked without their fur.

I would've thought that a lot of these things would be second nature to anyone who has tried them but a lot of people love fantasy..I mean if they are adults and they haven't tried them by now then they ought to - then they can stop guessing what life MIGHT be like and actually try living it. Yes, I suppose there's all the yucky "morality" and "guilt" - and it does make sense that you wouldn't want to hurt someone who has entrusted their life to you but I guess life is messy..it's more like a loaf of bread than a rock - if you poke one side of it, it pops back out the other side..

[sailorashore]

I have been having wonderful sex for almost a year now with a delightful Latino man 13 years my junior. I am fully bisexual, and lived almost thirty years with hardly any male sexuality in my life. I started out looking to explore my more "female" side, but have wound up being the "top" in our relationship for the most part. Now, my friend (and fuckbuddy), who has been gay since before he hit puberty, has recognized my hetero half and has expressed an interest is sharing me with a woman. Specifically, he thinks he might enjoy having me teach him to 'eat pussy.' Of course, this would involve a willing female partner. Alas, there is no such person on the horizon. Having experienced his oral talents extensively, I'm convinced that he could drive the right woman to distraction, and that he probably would enjoy it immensely, if only for the free exchange of positive sexual energy. I would love the chance to try explaining this scenario to a potential female partner, but these days adventurous women of a suitable age seem lots harder to find. Any volunteers?

[void()]

Well I had considered the idea that at least half of these threads are for the entertainment of the original posters. As cat said, it would be nice to see some posts about actual people instead of cum slut gangbangs every once in a while but only in some rare cases have I been truly offended by it (where it crosses into things like human subjugation and so forth.)

Am I gay, bisexual or bicurious - why yes, I am. Do I prefer ass or pussy? I like the whole person. Do I spit or swallow? Wouldn't you like to know...well the answer to that is that I don't give blowjobs to just anyone. Pegging? Fun, as long as the person doing the pegging isn't an asshole. Drinking cum? Maybe when I was a teen full of hormones but probably not any more. Threesomes? They can be a lot of fun, depending - but also very complicated. Poly relationships? With the right people, the right level of trust and the right resources to support and sustain each person. Trans folks? They don't hurt me, I know some males who have more nurturing energy and some females who have more masculine traits so I think it's a matter of finding the match for you, regardless of what is on the outside. Shaved or not? Shaved, usually - unless someone absolutely feels naked without their fur.

I would've thought that a lot of these things would be second nature to anyone who has tried them but a lot of people love fantasy..I mean if they are adults and they haven't tried them by now then they ought to - then they can stop guessing what life MIGHT be like and actually try living it. Yes, I suppose there's all the yucky "morality" and "guilt" - and it does make sense that you wouldn't want to hurt someone who has entrusted their life to you but I guess life is messy..it's more like a loaf of bread than a rock - if you poke one side of it, it pops back out the other side..

*reads & just sits chuckling, nodding, then shaking his noggin*