WoW. Just Wow.

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

I've been gone for about three months, and when I do finally come back, I find nothing has changed. Its primarily the same threads over and over again. Some may have a change in name, but its the same thing over and over. I was hoping for some light hearted conversation, or someone sharing something happy or positive in their lives. A promotion, a marriage, a new love...Something happy and positive. All there is is Sex. I know this is sacreligious coming from Me, but life isnt ALL about sex.
There's also nothing for or From many of the ladies like it used to be. It Used to be fun in here, it used to be people sharing and enjoying life. I'm sorry to see this has changed....
I wish all of those I knew well much happiness and a fantastic life. I think its time for me to moosy on.
Take care Ya'll.
Your Cat

[DuckiesDarling]

I'll miss you, my favorite pussy.

[Hypersexual11]

I'm actually surprised that there are as many women here as there are. This site is like a hard core porn site without all the visuals. Not something most women like. I know when I'm here and looking at the forum and my wife looks over my shoulder, I'm a little embarrassed about this place. It IS all about sex. Sex is what seperates us from the general population. I'm sure there are many places where a community can come together and talk about whatever like you said, but this is all about the sex.
I've seen you attempt to sway the conversation to other directions subtlety. It doesnt seem to work. We are here to see that there are other men in the world that are like us. It is reassuring to see that the feelings we have which have caused us so much grief thru our lives can be shared and we are not alone. There is little negative feedback, hate is dealt with swiftly. The negative comments to us are usually from some ignorant kid who few listen to anyway and a majority simply stop reading their comments. There is a place for judgmental people and it isn't here.
We'll miss you but I fully understand your desire to move away from this. It has to be hard for a woman to be constantly bombarded by ass stretching cum guzzling posts.

[tenni]

Hey Cat
None of us are perfect. You have been basically missing for quite some time. The old days were not perfect. There seems to be several stages on this site. I am inclined to think that a few factors either caused or contributed to the change. When I go back to read threads from the beginning (say around 2005) before either of us were members there was more tolerance and more concern interest in personal understanding about what it is to be bisexual in a monosexual world. I can not tell but then there was a time when more women posted but it came across as clique like to some and gave some a feeling that there was an inner circle.

There has been some lovely people on this site and some less liking. Annika, dark eyes and a few other bisexual /lesbian ladies still post sometimes. Some new bisexual ladies post as well.

I think that another change seemed to happen around when Drew revised the site to include the groups. The number of thread posts and threads changed. It has become more hard core sex based and far less intelligent discussion or even fantasy clique chat.(want a cookie ..lol) As far as posting about a change or promotion in someone's life I do not recall a lot of that. Maybe, the more hard core threads makes people feel less self disclosure about non sexual aspects of their lives?

The site has been less tolerant of non hetronormative values in some respects but that has been going on for awhile (2010?) and more salacious and tolerant of sexual acts on the other hand. Posters are less inclined to be interested in bisexual politics and global political issues. It has become more about dick and silly questions for threads but that seems to be slowing down as well and something new may be coming.

It seems that like life the only guarantee is "change" on this site.

Good fortune to you dumpling.

[Yoyome100]

You have, are and will be missed.

[Gypsy_Rose]

Cat,

we've never met, but i wanted to say i am sorry to see you go. i have enjoyed your posts, and hoped to someday have the chance to get to know you.
i disagree with hypersexual. there ARE two sides to this site, and while hyper's experience may be valid for him, there are still those of us here who find community, kindness, and networking and are not here JUST for the sex. although many of the people who are do their best to make us feel badly abt our perspective. so, i don't blame you for leaving. i wish you the best in your travels.

~Rose

[2bi2Bboring]

I wasn't going to comment because I understand much of the reason Cat is leaving. So many on here are so obsessed with their dicks or what they can put in their ass. It's obvious they are less concerned about what comes out of their mouths than what they can put in it. But this is a community, a flawed one, as most are, but one who needs moderating voices. This place may not be what it once was, but it will never be better if we don't change it.

Personally, I have seen the flaws, we have many, we are human after all. I want my community to have a conscience, to work toward accepting ourselves as fully actuated self-aware bisexual human beings. I want to introduce things that make people think and be more self-aware. I don't like the judgmental aspects of our community, judgement doesn't help us. In my estimation we have to accept the flaws, as well as the triumphs. I fully understand how seeing shallow sexual topics in the forum can wear down the resolve of those of us who actually care where our community is lead. I guess we have to accept that not all of us are much concerned beyond the end of our genitals, an unfortunate reality. But please, know that your voice matters to the rest of us, it matters because collectively we are much stronger WITH you than without you. We ALL matter, some may be consumed with the physical aspects of their sexuality, but many of us share concerns like yours. Frustration is inevitable, but I would encourage you to reconsider your decision to leave. We need people with a voice.
Best of luck, I hope you decide to stay.

[Gearbox]

You can't just wait around until somebody posts a thread that you feel is ok to be on the forum. The ones who don't post non-sexual interesting threads are just as much to blame for the way the forum shapes itself as the ones who post smut.

So ok! Who can think of something interesting and non-smut?

[Northerner]

Oh crap! I am sorry to hear you are leaving Cat. I have been away for quite a long time, this is my first visit and I was looking forward to joining the forums again. You among others made it an interesting place.

[2bi2Bboring]

I wasn't going to comment because I understand much of the reason Cat is leaving. So many on here are so obsessed with their dicks or what they can put in their ass. It's obvious they are less concerned about what comes out of their mouths than what they can put in it. But this is a community, a flawed one, as most are, but one who needs moderating voices. This place may not be what it once was, but it will never be better if we don't change it.

Personally, I have seen the flaws, we have many, we are human after all. I want my community to have a conscience, to work toward accepting ourselves as fully actuated self-aware bisexual human beings. I want to introduce things that make people think and be more self-aware. I don't like the judgmental aspects of our community, judgement doesn't help us. In my estimation we have to accept the flaws, as well as the triumphs. I fully understand how seeing shallow sexual topics in the forum can wear down the resolve of those of us who actually care where our community is lead. I guess we have to accept that not all of us are much concerned beyond the end of our genitals, an unfortunate reality. But please, know that your voice matters to the rest of us, it matters because collectively we are much stronger WITH you than without you. We ALL matter, some may be consumed with the physical aspects of their sexuality, but many of us share concerns like yours. Frustration is inevitable, but I would encourage you to reconsider your decision to leave. We need people with a voice.
Best of luck, I hope you decide to stay.

[onewhocares]

Mama Cat,

Like you, I have not been around much in the last year or so due to family matters. On those occasions when I would come to the site, like you I became so tired of nearly all the topic of the threads are sexually related. Actually, many of them are vulgar. I am no prude, but come on...read the history. I agree that I liked the old site, the old friends who were very much like family...but we can't look back, we can only look forward. Maybe the past really wasn't as great as we remember, but the friendships will last a lifetime. You will be in my heart always, dear special ladies.

Belle

[jem_is_bi]

Wow, just Wow, No Cat! Many have come and gone since I joined. You are one of the best. Life has been good to me, I hope the same for you.

[elian]

Beautiful cat, I love you so much for just being you..and I agree, it's not wrong to want to be loved and appreciated for more than just what is between your legs.. Maybe it's just me but I will always value a good friendship over a quick sexual encounter any day.

[salemite43]

I' so disappointed that I discovered your thread just as you were leaving. It IS a refreshing change of pace from most of the dross that is posted here daily. I have only relatively recently accepted my bisexuality, and I have been searching in vain for someone who shares my values and interests outside the bedroom. Don't get me wrong, I certainly enjoy those, but at my age and condition, my days of sexual marathons have devolved into rather leisurely strolls around the block. I had hoped to be able to share with other senior men, my path that led me to this site I wanted to find some form of affirmation of my particular sexual tastes, and see if I had drifted too far from the mainstream. I'm well past that point in my life where one's sexual prowess or size is as important to me as is their friendship, intimacy, and acceptance. I wish you well Cat, and hope your journey is filled with love, friendship, laughter, and good health.

[WebothBbi]

As the wife I can kinda feel for Cat. It seems like a sexualized male dominant set of threads. However we also walked in pretty much with the tight that this may either be the biggest hook up site or just a small community of chatters. Either way, we wouldn't be shocked. Have some aspects kind of been off the wall? Of course. (The favorite of mine is the man who didn't take notice that we lived clear across the country from him and had no way of meeting him that night like he was asking in his opening message. Lol) we have met some truly intriguing people, a few we hope to meet in person, some that we will hopefully remain chatting with both on and off the site as well should our paths never cross in person.
I guess it's also what you make of it too. But much positive and well wishes to you. And hopefully I'll get the honor of meeting you on another site if not here.

[Long Duck Dong]

thanks cat for many years of interesting and fun threads..... some very interesting and thread provoking thoughts and the chance to give a good ole shout out to the vets and currently serving military personnel and their supporters, friends and carers, are some of the legacy that you leave behind for us to remember fondly......

may the campfires burn brightly wherever mama cat stops to rest......

[tsac2k3]

I BRAVO THOSE THAT LIVES W/O SEX IN THEIR LIFE.

[CurEUs_Male]

Cat,
Lately I too have been a little let down by the quality of the discussions... I browse every couple days or so, and usually find nothing of interest to comment on. I don;t initiate too many threads, but I can say I usually liked some of the conversations you either started or provided input. It's a balance, and seems to have a good number of 'show me...' posts and such. So, while you are still here, why not pull your corner of the site back toward where you would like to see it? I challenge you (friendly challenge) to start a few conversations more in line with where you would like to be in our community... I promise to read them, and respond somehow!

Al

[Plumhead2]

I hope I can encourage you to stay. As you can see, there are people here who will miss you and who would like to engage in the kinds of discussions and topics that you would enjoy. Yes, life is about more than sex, and even sex has more to do than scrambled genitals. I hope you reconsider and will give some of us a chance to have the honor of your continued friendship.

[wifekinky4husband]

But it is a sex site. I have sites where I chat with my gfs and occasionally it will be about sex but mostly marriage, work, family, and life. I come here for a hope and a glimmer of it that I'll find the one thing that will help me trigger that last step in my search for extra play time. Sure we do not focus on sex all the time - it's been weeks since we even had time to have sex. We have other lives but this is not the site I share that I have other sites that are better suited for that.

[Cherokee_Mountaincat]

Thank you Loves.. I consider it. CM, I've tried over the years to start up some light-hearted threads (Camp Out, possibility of having a group grope in Las Vegas) and a few responded happily. But lately, it just seems like its the same old, same old...and that gets so old after a while. And so many of the old "Regulars" are now gone, or have moved on to greener pastures. I Realize this is a sex site, but sex only goes so far. I'm Probly going to jinx the hell out of this, but at least the resident troll hasnt been back---But..Summer is waning, and the kids will be back in school, and he'll be back shortly
All I can promise is I May check back in now and then after this last surgery. I might pop into a convo now and then. We'll see..:}
Yer Cat

[Plumhead2]

Cat, I remember the Camp Out. The thread occurred during my birthday and my partner was away. Even though the Camp Out was only words, it gave me such comfort and amusement. At the time, I never thanked you. Hope you get to see this message: "Thank you". If you can create such a sense of community through your words alone, I imagine you must be an incredible person in real life.

Yes this is a sex site, but sex is more than genitals and technique. It is connecting with someone's soul. It is being intimately aware of the person you are loving. So sometimes when I connect with people on here, the discussions are like sex in that I get to feel what that person is like if only through words. It is the joy of getting to know someone. That is what keeps me coming back here.

Yes, I know that the forum has changed. There is much more flaming. I was involved in a flaming incident and tried to apologize (I didn't start it and unintentionally flamed back) but it was not accepted. I felt so bad that I stayed away for a while. Maybe we, as citizens of bisexual.com can come up with some agreements about what is accepted and what is not.

Anyway, I have come to love this place, and 'cat you are one of the reasons. Stay if you will, and if you don't know I wish you merriment and love.

[CuriousSub]

Wait, don?t go. I just signed up and am looking for some real people to chat with. Yes, my posts have been largely sexual in nature but it is so hard to find good down to earth discussion these days. Covid has beat the hell out of us, it?s so important to be able to reach out

edit; OOPS! THIS IS LIKE A SUPER OLD THREAD...I don?t know how I found it. New here