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Thread: Bi Curious wife

  1. #1
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    Bi Curious wife

    I am new here, not sure how or where to post, But my question is about my wife. She had a fantasy about sleeping with a women, I let her fulfill her fantasy with a friend of hers. Do you think it is possible for those 2 to just be friends again. I know both women enjoyed it. But she told me she would not do anything behind my back. As a man I don't think I could be just friends with someone I had sex with, Just wondering how a women would feel.

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    Re: Bi Curious wife

    Yes, I believe they can be friends again.
    Don't worry so much, man.

    ~D~

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    Re: Bi Curious wife

    i would believe they can be! depends on how their friendship was before. i am sure its something they also talked about before hand also.

  4. #4

    Re: Bi Curious wife

    How is your sexuality. are you Bisexual. At least she is honest in saying that she would`nt do it behind your back, but would you be okay with it if they met on a regular basis , would you like to join them?maybe or meet a bisexual couple and try that together??

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    Re: Bi Curious wife

    Sorry WORRYMAN...you were one step ahead of me.

    Yes, I do think they can be friends. I think it speaks volumes about your wife as she was up front with you. I think you have to talk with her and see what she wants out of the relationship with the new lady. Does she want you involved or perhaps this is something just for her. Talk about your feelings and what you want as well.

    Belle in Boston

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    Re: Bi Curious wife

    I am straight, this was a weird situation, she knew that I wanted to see 2 women together, Only After the event is when she told me it was a fantasy of hers to do this. She tells me that most women are curious about this and just don't admit it. I really enjoyed watching the event, but afterwards when she asked to do it again, I could see the desire in her eyes, it weirded me out, so they never did it again. The other women is also married so no threesome. They were good friends before, and still hang out together now. She might go for a threesome but the situation would have to be perfect so it problably won't happen. Kind of confused as to if I should allow it to happen again. She is not asking for it but I know she would love to. They hang out together sometimes when I am not there, but I can't stop her because it is her good friend and because I ok'd it to start with.

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    Re: Bi Curious wife

    Why did her desire weird you out? If it makes you feel neglected or less desirable to her, then you really should tell her that.
    Even if you could stop her seeing her friend, it wouldn't change a thing about what she feels. Only what you feel.
    Best thing to do (IMO) is to be as open about your feelings & fears as you can with her, so she can be too. I'm sure she could put your mind at ease on a few things.

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    Re: Bi Curious wife

    Quote Originally Posted by worryman View Post
    I am straight, this was a weird situation, she knew that I wanted to see 2 women together, Only After the event is when she told me it was a fantasy of hers to do this. She tells me that most women are curious about this and just don't admit it. I really enjoyed watching the event, but afterwards when she asked to do it again, I could see the desire in her eyes, it weirded me out, so they never did it again. The other women is also married so no threesome. They were good friends before, and still hang out together now. She might go for a threesome but the situation would have to be perfect so it problably won't happen. Kind of confused as to if I should allow it to happen again. She is not asking for it but I know she would love to. They hang out together sometimes when I am not there, but I can't stop her because it is her good friend and because I ok'd it to start with.
    The in as much as she included you being in your mutual fantasy (as it turns out) is a definite plus. Has she indicated she wants to be with her without you? If not, you really should get together with her friend again for your wife's sake. She's apparently very much wanting to do so and you did say it was OK in the first place. To deny her your support for at least a bit more seems unfair. If so, you may have to "allow" it to happen again without you being there. (I'm note a huge fan of that particular term but that's another discussion)

    The fact of the matter is that you unwittingly opened a bit of a Pandora's Box and now have to at least be somewhat concerned that she'll be very tempted to be with this other woman and thus very tempted to do something behind your back if you withhold your support. Acceptance looks to be your best bet at this point and try to allow her to enjoy it "with" you as opposed to "in spite of" you. the weirdness may well wear off and the cool kinkiness of it may be the best.

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    Re: Bi Curious wife

    I agree with BHS, don't worry so much and yes they can be friends. I can't help but respond to your leaning toward it being a gender issue: My opinion is, that it is about an individual's capacity for emotional maturity and maturity regarding sexual intimacy. Supporting your wife's fantasy indicates your very high levels of capacity to be emotionally mature. I recognized my bisexuality 18 years ago, and I have learned that I and others can care deeply, love, or have no emotional attachment at all and have completely fulfilling sexual intimacy and sexual encounters. I am a woman, and my partner of 10 years is a female too. Best wishes.

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    Re: Bi Curious wife

    Keep the lines of open communication going Sugar. TALK to her, Ask her if there would ever be a possibility of your watching again, or perhaps joining in in a cucking capacity. If she and her friend would like to get together again, at least she's up front and open about it, and not slinking around behind your back...thats a wonderful thing. :}
    Just sit down and talk it out, Babe. I hope for the best for ya'll. ;}
    Cat
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    Robert A. Heinlein

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    Re: Bi Curious wife

    We find it interesting how you use the words "I allowed it", like you own her and you dictate to her what she will and will not do. That type of dictatorship doesn't work, it causes rebellion.
    Treat her like a thoroughbred and you will never have a nag.

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    Re: Bi Curious wife

    Quote Originally Posted by Cherokee_Mountaincat View Post
    Keep the lines of open communication going Sugar. TALK to her, Ask her if there would ever be a possibility of your watching again, or perhaps joining in in a cucking capacity. If she and her friend would like to get together again, at least she's up front and open about it, and not slinking around behind your back...thats a wonderful thing. :}
    Just sit down and talk it out, Babe. I hope for the best for ya'll. ;}
    Cat
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    Be yourself ... Everyone else is taken.

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    Re: Bi Curious wife

    I use the word allow because well that is about how I see it, While I realize that I don't own her, if she does sleep with someone else without my permission, that is cheating. And I have no use to be with a cheater. So while she is completely able to do whatever it is she wants, She may have to do it as a single person. So there may be a better word than allow, but I don't know what it is.
    On a side note, it has been a few months, and she has not asked or mentioned anything since. I know the time will come again when they go out on a night out sometime and I will prob start thinking about it again, for now our sex life is great, so I will let it ride I think.

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    Re: Bi Curious wife

    Quote Originally Posted by worryman View Post
    I am new here, not sure how or where to post, But my question is about my wife. She had a fantasy about sleeping with a women, I let her fulfill her fantasy with a friend of hers. Do you think it is possible for those 2 to just be friends again. I know both women enjoyed it. But she told me she would not do anything behind my back. As a man I don't think I could be just friends with someone I had sex with, Just wondering how a women would feel.
    Of course it is possible.. for many it is difficult and much depends on how they view each other and how important friendship is to them.. if and when it ends, ther may be a hiatus, maybe even a bitter falling out as happens in many relationships. For some time heals others not.. I am friends with several people with whom I had sex, very good friends with one who was an has never stopped being in my inner circle of friends.. he may be a man, but time has healed the rift between my ex-husband and I and we too are close friends, as is my partner with her's..

    That for one reason and other it is not always possible is a fact of life, and depending on many factors, the ending of sex, means the ending of friendship.. it shouldn't but it does.. the one person I would never have sex with is my best friend.. we have often over almost 15 years now shared a bed many times and we have cuddled, and been very close, yet such is the importance of our friendship to both of us, we long ago decided that to embark on a sexual relationship was much too dangerous because loving each other as we do, we both know that sex would change everything, and knowing that break up can be so difficult, it is something we would never risk.. the friendship is much too important to risk and much more important than the sex... we may love each other.. and spend a great deal of time together.. but the thought of living with her forever?? Heaven forfend... *laffs*..and I know I would do her nut in..
    Do not think so little of me as to grant me your tolerance. Allow me your acceptance and understanding of who and what I am with the love, respect and dignity with which I do you.

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    Re: Bi Curious wife

    Quote Originally Posted by worryman View Post
    I am straight, this was a weird situation, she knew that I wanted to see 2 women together, Only After the event is when she told me it was a fantasy of hers to do this. She tells me that most women are curious about this and just don't admit it. I really enjoyed watching the event, but afterwards when she asked to do it again, I could see the desire in her eyes, it weirded me out, so they never did it again. The other women is also married so no threesome. They were good friends before, and still hang out together now. She might go for a threesome but the situation would have to be perfect so it problably won't happen. Kind of confused as to if I should allow it to happen again. She is not asking for it but I know she would love to. They hang out together sometimes when I am not there, but I can't stop her because it is her good friend and because I ok'd it to start with.

    Be happy! You are a lucky guy!

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    Re: Bi Curious wife

    I agree, be happy. She did it so you could watch. Man, lighten up and enjoy it. There are a lot of us married to prudes.

 

 

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