So I've been dying to get topped, but I'm very afraid of how much it will hurt. Tell me honestly, does it hurt very bad? Does it hurt less the more you do it? Any tips for reducing the pain?
So I've been dying to get topped, but I'm very afraid of how much it will hurt. Tell me honestly, does it hurt very bad? Does it hurt less the more you do it? Any tips for reducing the pain?
It hurts a little, I was topped and I didn't feel the pain until like some time after I had sex, but it didn't hurt that much but I think lubrication could help reduce the painOriginally Posted by gfunk
my first and only attempt at being fucked by a guy didnt go well at all. but it hasnt discouraged me from wanting to try again some time. it realy hurt. i think it was mostly due to my being so tensed up and not being able yo relax my butt. i would like to try again some time. im very curious to what it would feel like to have a guy cum inside me. i have had a good experience also. i have a strapon and a girl friend of mine at the time we were friends with benifits, she agreed to do me with the strapon. she was quite sexualy adventurous and it was a strapon first for both of us. this time i better prepared myself with a thorough enema cleansing. iv read that is how the porn stars do it and for me its the only way to go. its best to not have any obtructions when the dildo, or cock enters the rear. she being a very good friend i wasnt tense or nervous at all and things went very smoothly. she slowly screwed me with the 5 inch dildo and it felt wonderful. starting out small can be an option. you can always move up to bigger if you want. so for me, to sum it up in my opinion and from my experience, do an enema first. use lubrication, i like water based lubes, its much easier to clean yourself up after your finished. start small. choose a partner who will understand its your first time and not be forceful or rough, that can be a fetish option if you want to explore that route later. be as relaxed as you can, arousal and excitement are going to be going in but you can still enable yourself to relax your butt to allow smooth entry. again this is just my way that worked for me. they are options you can consider. what ever you choose i wish you the best! i now know that being fucked in the ass can be very pleasurable.
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Last edited by othercat; Sep 6, 2011 at 3:21 AM.
yes you are right, that's why it hurt a little for me two, it was my first time, so I didn't relax that well.
I guess I'm in the minority . . it's never hurt me at all . . so it's really one of my favorite things to do.
if done correctly, it will not hurt at all. maybe your fear will make it hurt some but there is nothing to fear. get some anal eze or similar product and use that before you have intercourse. the anal eze has lidocaine in it and lidocaine is used for pain in the body cause i use lidocaine patches/creme on my back. i use that before i let my girlfriend use a strap on me. it dont hurt one bit. relaxing is a big part of having good anal sex. once the initial shock is over and the cock is inside you, have your partner to just lie there on top of you without moving so your body will adjust to the new intrusion. then have him start pulling in and out slightly and then more and more and you will find that you will be going full tilt. another thing is when the head of his cock makes contact with the anus and he starts pushing then you push out slightly like you are starting to take a dump and the harder he pushes the harder you push and you will slide right over the intruding cock. after it slides in there there is no use to push cause he will have you on his cock and make sure to use lots of lube. once you get your first experience then you will adjust and the next and next and next gets easier and easier and you will get to where you enjoy it and will bow to getting it every chance you get....but, be careful with partners due to STD's or the HIV virus. i wouldnt bareback with someone that i don know. stay with one partner if you can and you will have great anal sexual life.
Your first partner will be the key . He must be patient and gentle and use plenty of lube . I got started with a cousin of about the same age as me , we were 12 or so . We were not that big then , but knew enough to use lube . Our lube of choice was one of convenience , margerine . There was always a big tub of it on the kitchen table . We played up until our late twenties . By then we had settled into me being his bottom . He just didn't enjoy being fucked like I did . No lube needed . He produced sufficient precum . I was so used to him that he would be able to mount me easily . Quite often I would cum while he was pounding away in me . I still enjoy being mounted today . Not often enough these days .
my problem is this. all the men that say that they are bi is a bunch of bs, all they want to do is very lightly suck my cock then they turn there full attention to my wife. i have not had any man or men fuck me yet. i am full bisexual and love to be sucked and fucked. i want a man to shoot his load up my sissy ass with a condom. any takers?
Re: how bad does it hurt?
when done right and plenty of lube it dont hurt much at all and after a few times it never hurts any of course big dicks will leave you sore
MichiganCpl..not really sure what your problem is..."all the men that say they are bi is a bunch of bs". That statement doesn't make sense. I'm bi and my main desire is to suck cock; I would not be interested in your wife at all...I already have an amazing one. Perhaps the men you have met are as you described, but certainly not all men who say they are bi...my problem is this. all the men that say that they are bi is a bunch of bs, all they want to do is very lightly suck my cock then they turn there full attention to my wife. i have not had any man or men fuck me yet. i am full bisexual and love to be sucked and fucked. i want a man to shoot his load up my sissy ass with a condom. any takers?
At age 22 and without any real interest in performing bi sex but interested in geting a blow job I got extremly drunk one night.
I woke up laying in a strange bed, butt naked, with a body on top of me. I first realized thru my fogy brain that there was a weight on me. Then I realized that I had something in my ass. I realized that my drinking friend was on top of me fucking my ass. I also realized that there was another person in the room watching. I was mortified! I pretended to be asleep rather than face the fact that I was being ass fucked. I could feel his body sliding around on top of me with the lubricant spread between us. I also realized that he was going belly to butt with his cock all the way in me and I felt no pain. I could only feel him sliding in and around on the lub. I also realized, and this is important, that it felt good. I lay there and let him have his way, secretly enjoying the feeling, until he ejaculated in me. I thought it was over. I pretended to start waking up when I felt the shift of bodies and the second guy got between my legs and put his cock in me. I thought he must hve been vry smallbecause he went right in. I soon realized that he was a little bigger than the first guy because I was feeling a stretching sensation. I was being fucked again by the spectator. I let it happen. It continued to feel good except for a little heat being generated. Once again I felt what was now the coolness of his jizim splashing into me. He knew I was awake. He slipped out of me and turned me over. I let him do what he wanted. He took me in his mouth and sucked me to climax. That took about ten seconds.
Afterwards they both left the room. I lay there thinking that I may very well hve been ass fucked all night. I took a shower and got up the nerve to open the door and walk out. I was introduced to his Mother! I was introduced as a friend who had spent the night. I was beside myself with embarrisment. I excused myself and hastly made my exit. I found the nearest subway and left the area never to return.
So- it din't hurt at all because I was out cold when it started and I was was aparently well lubricated as well.
Now I want to do it again, completely sober and be able to experience the entire process.
First time i tried it we had to stop. Second time, very recently with a somewhat more patient partner. PLenty of lube and I found poppers helped as well. Was amaing fun.
Re: how bad does it hurt?
my asshole was all ready used to anal since my late wife had been doing me with a strapon for quite a few years before she passed away the first time i got it from a man was in a threesome with him and his wife and he was thicker than the dildo i was used to getting it hurt a little but felt good after i got used to his dick and felt great
The first and only time I've had anal, my partner rolled me over on my belly,somewhat to my surprise, put on a condom, lubed up and pushed it in. It really hurt. I told him to pull out. He did. Then he soothed me, circling his index finger around my anus and gently inserting it, asking me if it hurt. I replied no, it didn't. Then he told me he was going to put in two of his fingers and it might feel a little uncomfortable but it would feel better when he pushed his cock in. He told me to relax, push out and he slipped his cock back in and it felt much better, in fact it felt great. I had already cum earlier but I was on the verge of cumming again just as he orgasmed and I felt his cock spasm in my ass.
The moral of the story I guess is, take it slow,use plenty of lube and use a couple fingers to loosen up the sphincter muscles before trying anything bigger.
Makes me wonder what the hell is wrong with your asshole.
I recomend using a dildo to get your anal ring used to relaxing and having something pass through from that direction. Worked for me. No pain. Just that wonderful feeling of being fucked.
My first time at age 24 hurt like hell. We had to stop I couldn't get him in me. After that started doing my ass with cucumbers to open me up. I put a condom on them used a ton of lube. After lots of trying, I learned how to relax and let it just happen. Now I know how to relax and it is very hot and pleasurable. So do your self first to get to know how to relax.
well tonight was my first time and it didnt really hurt at all. just an ocasional twinge when we went to far but then would back right out and try again slower. we talked quite alot before hand and during about how and what to do.you must talk while your trying so he knows how your feeling. we really took our time and lots of lube found him being able to get almost his entire 7" in me in a very short time. we were both really excited and surprised how well it went for the first time. a few hours later i felt a little sore but not bad at all. im soooo looking foreward to our next play date!
yes true...but I do want to point out that there are some things to consider.
I got this information from watching a demonstration video of Bobbie Star giving tips on blow jobs. In that she also talked a bit about anal before she gave a great blow job to the guy there...but I digress...
She made the point that it doesn't work in all circumstances. Some people's frames just can't handle a cock that is too large or has too much girth. I related to this because as many times as I've tried I've never been able to get any guy in me that was too thick as much as I've wanted to. However, if the dimensions are right, I have no problems. Occasionally I"ll experience discomfort, but not often. It takes a lot of patience and the right person. He has to have patience if you're not ready. And if playing is a turn on with getting your hole ready (such as rimming or massaging the area and of course things should be very clean), then eventually you relax and the desire to have something in you begins. So that's usually the best time to start with sliding a finger in and then eventually two...and if you're really turned on, a cock will slide in with the greatest of pleasure for you or should by this point. Once he starts and unless you're really ready for it all at once, it's usually best to have him go in just up to a point and you'll know if you're ready for more. If you're really feeling turned on, then one complete stroke in should feel amazing.... Of course, it's different for everyone as many have pointed out. Some are ready to get on with things pretty quickly. Though I'm talking here like I have a lot of experience with this, it is limited. But the few experiences I have had have been very enjoyable. When I first tried many years ago, it was miserable and never enjoyable because those who did it didn't care to be patient at all and I was in my late teens and early twenties and thought this was the way it was and there could be no pleasure...that's all different now.
Re: how bad does it hurt?
I've always been a top, butt consider myself versatile because I enjoy playing with my asshole, fingerfucking while I j/o & have used toys on myself. I had a threesome one time with a guy I had known sexually for a while & a friend of his whom I'd never met. His friend wanted to fuck me & I agreed, but he just started trying to stick his finger straight in me without any lube or anything. Needless to say my asshole locked up tighter than a drum & I told him it just wasn't going to happen. If he had taken the time to start out slow, suck my cock some more & work his way around to my ass, rim me for a while or use some lube & tickle my hole to relax me he might have gotten in there & got my cherry. As it is, I'm still a virgin, butt I still like being a top & sucking so there you go!
If it hurts then you are doing something wrong or dont really want it. The key is to relax and feel comfortable with the guy you are with. Foreplay doesnt hurt either. I like to start with a great rim job get it nice and wet. Then slide a finger or two in to loosen it up. Then when its totally relaxed wet and ready slide in slowly and start pumping in and out till your partner moans with delight. And the best part is shooting a hot warm load deep inside then pull out and watch it drip out then feed it to your partner. MMMM
It's the same for me. It might be because I like getting topped so much that I was always relaxed, even from the very first time. Lots of lube helps along with having your partner take it slow until you adjust to him.
In my honest opinion, it all depends on your partner. If they have no clue what they are doing they could hurt you by going to fast or not lubing you enough. Well you could make those same errors also. But if you take it slow at first and are lubed plenty then you sould be able to enjoy it greatly. Make sure your partner can relax you while sticking it in as well.
I love being bisexual. Your like Hanna Montana, you get the best of both worlds.
Re: how bad does it hurt?
Like someone said earlier...it depends on your partner and what you let him do. I started at a young age so at this point unless I get hold to a whopper I love the feeling of a dick sliding into me...I have had 3 womens strap me but before they did I talked to them about it before I let them do it. Love it
You guys need to think about your rectum for what it is: three muscles that work with another set farther in to perform a specific natural function. If you want them to perform another function they will need to workout a little. Some suggestions:
1. Water-based lubricant ... I personally prefer KY jelly. Lasts a long time and stays where you put it ... for the most part. Lubricants designed for the vagina are not well suited for the rectum and lubricants with pain-killers can mask the only immediate indication you have that damage is being done. I squeeze several tubes of KY into a resealable wide-mouth jar so that I can get more lube one-handed.
Lubricants with other (non-water) ingredients can enter the bloodstream very quickly through the colon and cause some real problems. If you feel like you need to shit for hours later, even after defecating, then you are using the wrong lube. This is also true of many of the sex toys made for women. The vaginal walls do not absorb nasty chemicals the same as our sensitive little holes do. Also, be very careful with giving someone a wine enema ... the alcohol is absorbed so quickly that it is very easy to poison them.
2. Stretching ... I've tried them all and I don't recommend anything but glass. Phallix makes some great glass butt plugs of graduated sizes that I have used for years to make my hole stronger and stronger. Also, it isn't really a workout without reps and, in this case, that takes some time. I make it a habit of working at my desk with a plug in my ass ... often for hours at a time. However, you need to be ready for the "side-effect" ... your body takes this intrusion as an excuse to completely empty your colon! On the positive side, if you stretch at least twice a week, it is very easy to stay relatively clean.
If you choose a plug with a big enough differential between the head and shaft sizes you can walk around all day that way! In this case, I shift to a hard plastic like acryllic because it weighs less. Sitting on a glass plug for a long time is one thing, carrying that much weight with your rectum muscles is something else entirely ... unless you have a slave that needs training.
3. Temperature ... warm your toys and plugs before even trying to insert them. It is difficult to relax your rectum when it is recoiling in pain from the cold! I use a temperature-adjustable heating pad wrapped around the toy to bring it up to body temperature (or slightly above since the lube will be cold).
4. Muscle control ... now that your bum hole is stronger, you need to pay attention to how it works. The rectum muscles are linked to another set of muscles to make it possible to perform the natural function for which they were designed. When you clench your rectum shut, internal muscles relax and stop pushing outward. If you bear down (like when you are trying to take a shit), those internal muscles contract and the rectum relaxes to allow the movement of your bowels. So, though it is counter-intuitive, to open the door for a cock you must bear down as if to resist the entry! I know it sounds backwards but it works.
5. Know your tunnel ... as you graduate to longer and longer instruments you will find that the path is not straight and significant deviation (no pun intended) from the path will cause great discomfort ... this is where the real pain is! The other advantage to stretching exercises is that you get to know your own body. Personally, I need to arch my back a little to align a really long tool with the correct pathway ... your mileage may be different! Frankly, everybody is different ... but I think that is why we're here.
I have also found that since I started doing this sort of workout that I have much fewer problems with 'roids.
I hope this helps. If you have any questions, ask away. I cannot, however, promise to answer ... I am not a doctor and I will not pretend to know things that I do not.
Sincerely,
Dom Submerge
Last edited by domsubmerge; Sep 25, 2011 at 6:07 PM. Reason: grammer
It doesn't hurt at all if you prepare properly. You need to lube up and stretch it out yourself beforehand. Use a ton of lube and you'll be fine.
IT was amazing for me. I have been with several men over the years. I am a complete bottom. there is nothing better then having a man enter you and eventually cum inside you. Completely brings out the feminine side. My wife has used a strap on in me many times but nothing compares to the sensual feeling of a man inside you. They sell Anal ease jell at all porn shops. highly recommend it. it turns you tight ass into a smooth wet pussy in minutes.
I have only taken it in the ass once and he was not very big. He was patient and used lots of lube. It was a little uncomfortable at first but he worked my hole nicely and it felt so good when I relaxed and could feel him penetrating me. His cock felt good inside me and I was so excited knowing he had busted my cherry and was fucking me. I am looking forward to the second time and taking one a little bigger.
Last edited by mikeyd270; Aug 27, 2014 at 3:16 PM. Reason: one word left out.
My thanks to all you men above for your experiences and your excellent recounting--some of your accounts took my breath away. Thanks to Kentbi for your response, I was about to leap to my keyboard in our defense when I read your eloquent entry. And to ErosUrge and the woman he quoted on the subject of anatomical differences. I have just somewhat painfully broken up with a fine latino gentleman with whom I am deeply involved. I sought him out at a time when I was still experimenting with new-found adult bisexuality (after having only 'discovered' it almost 40 yrs ago, or, as he so generously put it "coming out of the closet") and immediately seduced him. I asked him to fuck me within an hour of being alone with him, and he obliged. He is gifted with an enormously thick dick that I cannot take more than half of when he is fully aroused. It didn't go well at first, but I wanted him badly, and was vocal. He later explained that he was very much a "bottom" and that he wanted me in him. I've enjoyed this past year being a top for him--we both love it. But I am so frustrated that I simply cannot accommodate his lovely, beautiful, extreme girth, and saddened that I'm not sure I want to keep on trying. I'm an older guy and don't know how many years of happy sex I have left in me, and I am keenly aware of the loss of elasticity and flexibility in many other organs of my body, so I am concerned that if we stay together he will stretch me beyond my capacity to recover--and at my age a tight sphincter is one of my few remaining assets. So off I go in search of a gentleman (hopefully half of a couple) with a slender dick. I love my sweet hombre (a first for me, in many ways) and will be there for him always...but we just can't fit.
Patience is the name of the game. You need to go slowly at first, then once you are relaxed, you'll be able to move in and out with ease and enjoy it. I would suggest lubing a finger, sliding it in, wait, then do it over. Keep adding lube. Someone else mentioned temperature, and it's true that the warmer the toy, the easier it will be to insert. A penis is body temp so that's not really relevant. Once you get it most of the way in, just wait a minute or two without moving. Go a little deeper and wait again. Eventually, you'll relax and you'll want it deeper. Within a few minutes, you'll be able to slide in and out, not only pain free, but feeling one of the most incredible feelings you can experience. I love riding my toys and used to do it only once in a great while. However, I recently got a high quality VixSkin dildo and it feels so damn real that I now "ride the cock" every chance I get. I find regular masturbation (and sometimes even actual MF sex) a bit boring since the orgasm is so much more intense with your ass filled. I am still waiting to meet the guy who will be willing to give me the Real Deal.
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