Register
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 30 of 58
  1. #1

    What attracts a man to another man?

    I found my bi side about 10 yrs ago and am now 52 yrs young. I've never really looked at a guy or a group of guys and thought they were nice looking. But now I'm on a dating site for same gender as myself, and still can't really understand the attraction to other men. Now, if they were to walk around half naked I could comment all day long! I would enjoy hearing others opinions. And open to all opinions. Thank you.

  2. #2

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    i wrote about this in my blog recently, how i'm attracted to both sexes. about all i could add to it is, with men it's more about pure lust, with women it's more personal & substantial.

  3. #3

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    i like both just depens on the man and how he acts

  4. #4

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    Ive been acting on my BI feelings for over 15 years now and have yet to look at a guy in the same way I look at women well, actually there was one guy that I was attracted to, but he was in the men’s locker room changing clothes after we had played racquetball. He’s a very nice guy, who is also in very good shape and nicely hung! But prior to that scene, I’d only seen him in workout clothes on the court, kicking my ass in Racqetball 😄

    but besides him, and besides that instant, guys have just been guys to me. Someone to compete against in sports, or to take to about sports or cars and such

    as far as how I chose the guys Ive had have sex with, it’s more of opportunity and compatibility than attraction. I’m married, in the closet and older, so with that trifecta my opportunities are few and far between So I look for guys who are discreet, don’t mind older and who understand that my availability is sporadic. When I do find someone, I try to give them the utmost amount of pleasure that I can, so that hopefully they will want to return for seconds 😋

  5. #5

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    I've noticed that when I'm attracted to another man it's because he looks more similar to me, my age group, race, in the same place in life somewhat. Weird I guess.

  6. #6
    Coastocoast
    Guest

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    I will Preface this by saying I am single, quiet about my sexuality due to work and some family members, but am comfortable with being bi. I am attracted to both sexes but with me there are similarities and differences in what attracts me to each. I am not attracted sexually to attached people of either gender; yes I note someone good looking but there is a veto on my end with anyone attached, that is just me. I am monogamous with anyone I am with and do not use being bisexual as an excuse to cheat on someone the opposite gender of the person I am seeing. With both I tend to like for them to be intelligent, seeking a monogamous situation, height weight proportionate and no they do not need to look like a god or goddess. Women, I like physically feminine and soft but mentally strong. With women I am looking for romance and a more emotional attachment. With men, I like them masculine but not macho or egotistical, more a regular guy that is intelligent. I am looking for a good / best friend that has a sexual element to the friendship and although I am orally versatile I prefer the top if intercourse in involved. I am not looking for the strong romance but a good friendship and one that passes for straight in public. When I see someone that attracts me, I cannot always put your finger on why but when I am not attracted to I generally know why. I do not need a woman with boobs the size of my head or a guy that needs to toss his junk over his shoulder to keep from stepping on it getting out of the shower, it is generally a personality and attitude combined with someone reasonably physically attractive to me. Like with everyone else finding the right person is difficult. My issue always seems to be people are attached looking for something on the side so I am out.

  7. #7

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    Unlike marriage and the commitment that involves it is sometimes easier to act out sexual wants and needs with a man due to the lack of emotion. All of my friends that I play with are also married and for them as well as me it’s a quick safe and easy way to satisfy our sexual desires without the emotional attachment.

    Since coming out to my wife this this has been easier and more pleasing knowing she too had same sex with other women, now we share our friends and life is great. As far as my buddy goes, I know he isn’t getting any sex at home and his desires are off the charts, he lives very close and it’s very convenient that he does as we service each other almost every morning. As we are early risers, my wife is fast asleep as we play downstairs, we milk each other as I said almost daily and I personally love our interactions.

  8. #8

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    i feel similar. i loooove women & crave the deep emotional connection. love intelligence in women too. if i had to choose 1 there's no question i would choose the opposite sex. but i'm glad i don't have to choose the same sex is something i would love to explore & i really hope to do it someday. also want intelligence in a man & looking for some kinda connection, after all sex is about being involved with another person. otherwise u might as well masterbate. i also respect monogomy. i guess i'm open to multiple fwb's but if it came to committment i wouldn't want anyone else & i wouldn't want someone being with me behind the back of there spouse/bf/gf. i guess u can have open relationships & i'd be ok with that in theory but i don't think i'd want that for me.
    Quote Originally Posted by Coastocoast View Post
    I will Preface this by saying I am single, quiet about my sexuality due to work and some family members, but am comfortable with being bi. I am attracted to both sexes but with me there are similarities and differences in what attracts me to each. I am not attracted sexually to attached people of either gender; yes I note someone good looking but there is a veto on my end with anyone attached, that is just me. I am monogamous with anyone I am with and do not use being bisexual as an excuse to cheat on someone the opposite gender of the person I am seeing. With both I tend to like for them to be intelligent, seeking a monogamous situation, height weight proportionate and no they do not need to look like a god or goddess. Women, I like physically feminine and soft but mentally strong. With women I am looking for romance and a more emotional attachment. With men, I like them masculine but not macho or egotistical, more a regular guy that is intelligent. I am looking for a good / best friend that has a sexual element to the friendship and although I am orally versatile I prefer the top if intercourse in involved. I am not looking for the strong romance but a good friendship and one that passes for straight in public. When I see someone that attracts me, I cannot always put your finger on why but when I am not attracted to I generally know why. I do not need a woman with boobs the size of my head or a guy that needs to toss his junk over his shoulder to keep from stepping on it getting out of the shower, it is generally a personality and attitude combined with someone reasonably physically attractive to me. Like with everyone else finding the right person is difficult. My issue always seems to be people are attached looking for something on the side so I am out.

  9. #9

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    For me it's all about the penis. There are obviously certain qualities that would make me not want to play with another guy, but for the most part if he has a really nice dick I'll be into playing with it. The only other piece of criteria that matters to me is personality. The other guy needs to be cool enough and nice enough for me to want to hang out with him and show my more submissive, vulnerable side.

    In general, I'm not and never have been "attracted" to guys. I've never checked other guys out; and I notice that because I still check hot women out all the time, but never other guys. Like many of you here have expressed, my love for dicks is purely a sexual thing, and 99% of my attraction depends solely on whether I like his penis or not.

  10. #10

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    I like a good looking guy with a nice body and a hot bubble butt

  11. #11

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    I like men as friends if they are nice people.
    I like men as sexual partners if they are gay or bisexual and intelligent.
    JEM

  12. #12

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    It has been a struggle for me to answer your question, the different levels that occur to me. I am attracted to men that show an attraction to me. A naked man gets my immediate attraction. During the course of everyday life I am not usually attracted to guys I see out and about. If I see a guy exudes gayness, he gets my attention.

    Looking at different personal ads, I may get attracted to a heavy guy with big tits and big dark nipples, or a fine looking ass on guy may get my sex drive racing. Sometimes it is feeling like we are in a similar situation and have a mutual understanding that is the attraction.

    There may even be a biological reason. I prefer men sexually.

  13. #13

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    I'm not really attracted to men, but I love m/m sex.

  14. #14

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    I’m not attracted to men, but I have an intense craving to suck cocks.

  15. #15

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    I have had good, and sometimes terrific sex, with all sorts of men. What first attracts me is the sense that he may be interested in having sex with me.

  16. #16

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    That's awesome to have a wife and a buddy on the same page! Congrats! I too, am not attracted to men per say. But once a get a glance of their package, if you will.... Well it's game on.
    Last edited by coolbreeze69; Jan 17, 2019 at 1:05 PM.

  17. #17

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    Quote Originally Posted by coolbreeze69 View Post
    That's awesome to have a wife and a buddy on the same page! Congrats! I too, am not attracted to men per say. But once a get a glance of their package, if you will.... Well it's game on.
    Same here , don't find men generally attractive but completely turned on by a nice cock.

  18. #18

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    Quote Originally Posted by Bisexual Explorer View Post
    I have had good, and sometimes terrific sex, with all sorts of men. What first attracts me is the sense that he may be interested in having sex with me.
    Honestly that about sums it up. If he has a positive attitude, clean and wants to suck my cock as bad as I want his.

  19. #19

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    Do we have things in common, similar in build and looks, and is he cut or uncut! If he's uncut that I the kicker as I am a push over for an intact cock!!!

  20. #20

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    many characters for example i like strong guys

  21. #21

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    I sometimes suspect I am more on the gay side of bi, as I love every bit of a man from kissing to cuddling up to sleep. I was married for thirty years , but now a widower at 60, so why not.

  22. #22

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    Oh man where to start.. men well I must admit that the more I am with other men there seems to be more and more things that turn me on about them.. I being submissive bottom love being pleasure to men.. the sheer thought that I another man can turn on and give pleasure to another man is amazing.. I love it..
    ok there are many things I find attractive about a man.. his looks, smell, walk, attitude, dress, the way he speaks, his voice, his ass, the bulge in his pants!! Smile, eyes, all things that can turn me on.. and it is most likely that it happens all of a sudden.. I am turned on, wound up and ready to get on my knees or all fours and give him what he wants.. I can go from 0 to 100 in a split second.. naked and taking every inch right now.. I think I am turning gay!!

  23. #23

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    I find that whole issue quite confusing. When I try to figure out what it is about men that turns me on, I am more struck by what doesn't turn me on about them.

    I do not find men erotically attractive. Even when I am quite convinced that I want a man, I go out into public and try to look at men in the same way that I see women, and I'm back to wondering what I was thinking about in the first place. I know when a man is handsome and well-built, but I don't find either feature to be particularly attractive to me or an erotic turn-on. If I see an athletic man, I may be impressed that he takes good care of himself, but it does not stimulate me erotically to picture him naked. I do not find that a man dressing in a particular way turns me on, in the way that a woman wearing a revealing or suggestive outfit or one that enhances some part of her anatomy will turn me on. It is quite common when I am out in public for my eyes to stray to a woman's breasts or bottom or her legs or the beautiful features of her face, but if I see an athletic man and look at his bulging arms, there is nothing erotically attractive about it for me. I similarly fail to find myself staring at a man's butt or crotch, in the way that I so readily gaze at some anatomic features of women, but if I do just by chance, it is not in any sense stimulating to me.

    When I look at porn images, in terms of male:male sex, I am most interested in still images of big, hot cocks and balls. To watch men kissing and hugging or massaging each other's breasts looks downright silly to me. I find myself wondering if I might enjoy it, because it really can't feel much different than sucking face with a woman, but that really turns me on, and trying to fantasize about doing it with another man, while it doesn't turn me off, does not turn me on, either. As much as I think I'd like to be both a top and a bottom in anal sex with a male, and to fantasize doing so while jerking off can really stimulate me, to watch it in videos turns me off, and looking at the men's butts in sex videos is not a turn-on. In picturing having anal sex with a male, the concept of being passively fucked or of actively controlling a man is not part of it. I just figure either one would feel really good, sexually. While I enjoy stimulating a woman's anus with my fingers and tongue, the idea of playing with another guy's anus or licking it really turns me off. I prefer watching lesbian porn to watching gay male porn by far and find it way more stimulating. One of the most stimulating sorts of porn for me is the so-called futanari porn, where a beautiful and shapely woman has a big (and in terms of what turns me on, not ridiculously big) cock and balls. At the same time that is true, I don't get tranny porn, at all, because I know they are, in one sense, men, and I recognize how unfair it is for me to say that, but it is what I feel. I would just love to have a woman with a really nice cock!

    I do not feel romantically attracted to men, either. When I am with a woman I find attractive, I feel like I want to be part of a relationship with her. Even with strange women that I run across out in public, it is common for me to think, as I talk with them, that it would be nice if we had some sort of a relationship going on. That may be sexual, but I find I more generally am attracted to women, even in non-sexual ways. When I get involved with men, there is more of a sense of convenience, as in if we find we share common interests, it can be fun to do them together as friends sharing common interests, but that is the extent of the involvement.

    In the end, the only thing that I find attractive in men is the idea of sucking, fondling, and otherwise playing with their cock and balls, smelling their musk, stimulating them to the point that they cum, and having them return the favor in all of those regards. That is more erotically stimulating to me, ironically, than sexual involvement with a woman's genitals, but I am very turned on by that, as well, and given the overall sense in which I am far more attracted to women and have stronger feelings toward women, and I do not want to have sex just for the sake of sex, and do not want to be in any sense promiscuous, I have elected to be involved entirely with women, aside from passing involvement with a couple of gay and bisexual male partners when I was a teen. I have always had a strong enough sex drive, that I could enjoy taking full part in a straight sexual relationship and partnership, while enjoying masturbating with powerful fantasies of male-male sex in between. I have always been frightened of sexually acquired infections, so have always wanted to be faithfully involved with a person who I understood to be "clean". It has allowed me always to have sex without use of condoms, and for that reason, I want to be faithful both for my sake and for the sake of my partners.

  24. #24

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    For me, it is about the "Energy" of the person that I am with at the time. This goes for females and Males.

  25. #25

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    CockHummer I agree totally it is all very confusing.. I ust to be very confused by it all.. then I decided to just relax and go with it.. I have found that by not trying to understand what and why I enjoy being turned on a lot more and way more often.. it can happen anywhere and at anytime and anyplace.. doesn’t mean I am being slutty just horny a lot more being turned on by a lot more men.. and all sorts of men.. so just relax and quit trying to understand and enjoy it��������������

  26. #26

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    Quote Originally Posted by Fzmr9t View Post
    Ive been acting on my BI feelings for over 15 years now and have yet to look at a guy in the same way I look at women well, actually there was one guy that I was attracted to, but he was in the men’s locker room changing clothes after we had played racquetball. He’s a very nice guy, who is also in very good shape and nicely hung! But prior to that scene, I’d only seen him in workout clothes on the court, kicking my ass in Racqetball 

    but besides him, and besides that instant, guys have just been guys to me. Someone to compete against in sports, or to take to about sports or cars and such

    as far as how I chose the guys Ive had have sex with, it’s more of opportunity and compatibility than attraction. I’m married, in the closet and older, so with that trifecta my opportunities are few and far between So I look for guys who are discreet, don’t mind older and who understand that my availability is sporadic. When I do find someone, I try to give them the utmost amount of pleasure that I can, so that hopefully they will want to return for seconds 
    I can really identify with what you've said here Fz. I'm more drawn to women for sure, and there's nothing more alluring than a woman with a sexy attitude. With me it's more about that attitude than pure looks for either a man or a woman though. I can be attracted to a person for reasons I can't explain other than to say, he / she just kinda does it for me. Hah!

  27. #27

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    Quote Originally Posted by CockHummer View Post
    I find that whole issue quite confusing. When I try to figure out what it is about men that turns me on, I am more struck by what doesn't turn me on about them.

    I do not find men erotically attractive. Even when I am quite convinced that I want a man, I go out into public and try to look at men in the same way that I see women, and I'm back to wondering what I was thinking about in the first place. I know when a man is handsome and well-built, but I don't find either feature to be particularly attractive to me or an erotic turn-on. If I see an athletic man, I may be impressed that he takes good care of himself, but it does not stimulate me erotically to picture him naked. I do not find that a man dressing in a particular way turns me on, in the way that a woman wearing a revealing or suggestive outfit or one that enhances some part of her anatomy will turn me on. It is quite common when I am out in public for my eyes to stray to a woman's breasts or bottom or her legs or the beautiful features of her face, but if I see an athletic man and look at his bulging arms, there is nothing erotically attractive about it for me. I similarly fail to find myself staring at a man's butt or crotch, in the way that I so readily gaze at some anatomic features of women, but if I do just by chance, it is not in any sense stimulating to me.

    When I look at porn images, in terms of male:male sex, I am most interested in still images of big, hot cocks and balls. To watch men kissing and hugging or massaging each other's breasts looks downright silly to me. I find myself wondering if I might enjoy it, because it really can't feel much different than sucking face with a woman, but that really turns me on, and trying to fantasize about doing it with another man, while it doesn't turn me off, does not turn me on, either. As much as I think I'd like to be both a top and a bottom in anal sex with a male, and to fantasize doing so while jerking off can really stimulate me, to watch it in videos turns me off, and looking at the men's butts in sex videos is not a turn-on. In picturing having anal sex with a male, the concept of being passively fucked or of actively controlling a man is not part of it. I just figure either one would feel really good, sexually. While I enjoy stimulating a woman's anus with my fingers and tongue, the idea of playing with another guy's anus or licking it really turns me off. I prefer watching lesbian porn to watching gay male porn by far and find it way more stimulating. One of the most stimulating sorts of porn for me is the so-called futanari porn, where a beautiful and shapely woman has a big (and in terms of what turns me on, not ridiculously big) cock and balls. At the same time that is true, I don't get tranny porn, at all, because I know they are, in one sense, men, and I recognize how unfair it is for me to say that, but it is what I feel. I would just love to have a woman with a really nice cock!

    I do not feel romantically attracted to men, either. When I am with a woman I find attractive, I feel like I want to be part of a relationship with her. Even with strange women that I run across out in public, it is common for me to think, as I talk with them, that it would be nice if we had some sort of a relationship going on. That may be sexual, but I find I more generally am attracted to women, even in non-sexual ways. When I get involved with men, there is more of a sense of convenience, as in if we find we share common interests, it can be fun to do them together as friends sharing common interests, but that is the extent of the involvement.

    In the end, the only thing that I find attractive in men is the idea of sucking, fondling, and otherwise playing with their cock and balls, smelling their musk, stimulating them to the point that they cum, and having them return the favor in all of those regards. That is more erotically stimulating to me, ironically, than sexual involvement with a woman's genitals, but I am very turned on by that, as well, and given the overall sense in which I am far more attracted to women and have stronger feelings toward women, and I do not want to have sex just for the sake of sex, and do not want to be in any sense promiscuous, I have elected to be involved entirely with women, aside from passing involvement with a couple of gay and bisexual male partners when I was a teen. I have always had a strong enough sex drive, that I could enjoy taking full part in a straight sexual relationship and partnership, while enjoying masturbating with powerful fantasies of male-male sex in between. I have always been frightened of sexually acquired infections, so have always wanted to be faithfully involved with a person who I understood to be "clean". It has allowed me always to have sex without use of condoms, and for that reason, I want to be faithful both for my sake and for the sake of my partners.
    Everything you state CH makes a lot of sense. I (and others probably) appreciate your having taken the time to think through and form such a well articulated reply.

  28. #28

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    Agreed cs.

  29. #29

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    Quote Originally Posted by Fzmr9t View Post
    as far as how I chose the guys Ive had have sex with, it’s more of opportunity and compatibility than attraction. I’m married, in the closet and older, so with that trifecta my opportunities are few and far between So I look for guys who are discreet, don’t mind older and who understand that my availability is sporadic. When I do find someone, I try to give them the utmost amount of pleasure that I can, so that hopefully they will want to return for seconds 
    You and l are a lot alike. I had a close FWB for a while but then he got weird. It's what all of us crave but really hard to find. Now days it's take it when and where you can get it. Where do you live in Texas? My family lives in the DFW area. I was just there in December.

  30. #30

    Re: What attracts a man to another man?

    I'm with the general consensus. I'd rather see a woman's face in my lap than a man's. On the other hand, if my face is in contact with anything in the area normally covered by his shorts I am so turned on. I feel more comfortable totally letting go in a man's mouth from the first lick till he's satisfied, because any man that has taken my cock in his mouth really, really wanted it. He wasn't doing it just to please me.

 

 

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
Back to Top