chat behavior

I have to wonder about the people who PM me when in the chat here. Why do 50+ yr old men act 12 ? I have had startlingly few real conversations in PMs from strangers here. Most often I get inarticulate questions about the explicit details of my sex life. Do people act this way in person ? Are these guys new to being Bi , and assuming that they don't have to behave in a civilized manner ? Is there some weird etiquette that I was never told about? Since when is it acceptable to start a conversation with a total stranger by asking about their spouse's pubic hair? ( the most common question I am posed with)
Am I just being an asshole ?

Welcome to the Internet buddy ;).

I'm certain plenty of pervert's (not the good kind either :bigrin:) trolls and other undesirables hang out on here.

It's not acceptable in real life for people to ask those questions. That's why they are on the Internet............ :rolleyes:

I don't think half the people that frequent here are actually gay/bi either. Possibly old men/women pretending to be young girls/boys so they can cyber? Sadly gaydar doesn't work down a phone line :bigrin:.

Yeah. It's unfortunate, but at least it's not an issue that only we only have to deal with on here.
You'll get the same thing from dating sites as well as regular chats. Shame, really.

Just do what I do. Put them on ignore (you do know how to do that don't you?).

If they are persistent over time, out them. Inform them, in the public chat that their behavior is rude and disgusting. Nothing like public shame to alter behavior.

No, of course these people aren't like this in real life. Can you imagine a person coming up to you on the street and asking if you are cut or not? LOL they'd be in jail before they would have a chance to come back on bi.com and be more of a pervert in chat.

I think a lot of the reason why they are like that is because they are just horny, for whatever reason can't or don't want to get it at home that night, and their hard dicks are overpowering the part in the brain that filters out inappropriate behavior.

And then there are those (not many from the looks of it) that will readily answer their question, flirt back, and give them what they want. I don't know about you, but when I win fifty bucks off of a scratch off lotto ticket, I tend to buy the same tickets again in the future:tongue:

It is absurd sometimes, the way they act. I've been called many different names in private before simply because I refused to play into their games. I dislike ignoring people unless I've really had it, so I guess that is my fault leaving myself open for them to be an ass to me a little bit, but that still does not justify them being rude and mean. Really, the best thing to do is to make up your mind that these people are and will always be out there and if you don't like it, ignore truly is the best option.

Jason, we all get that kind of pvt msg, and, like allbi, I don't even bother to respond, I just ignore it. Online they can SAY they are older, but my personal experience has been that it is younger men who ask me those types of questions, as if I should be shocked or interested... I am consistently NEITHER. One asked me (FDLMAO) if I STILL at my age :eek: had "relations".

Skafsgaard, excellent point ! ... sadly, there are LOTS of rude people (irrespective of their sexuality) everywhere today: not only in chat rooms and dating sites.. I'm thinking grocery stores, customer "service" hotlines, and especially on the highway.

Well, my profile clearly states: I will NOT cyber, yet two chatters persistently hound me (not room regulars btw)... barging into my pvtmsgs while I'm quietly chatting to someone else. So, once, about a year ago, I told this one chatter that if s/he kept it up I would "out" them. Reluctantly, after 3 warnings, I did it... and no sooner did the "outing" appear on the screen than I got about 5 pms from friends saying "oh s/he was bugging you too?" I didn't feel so guilty after that.

Allbi, I don't think the person felt shamed at all, because it happened AGAIN and now when I see their name I just keep them on iggy.

Overall my experiences here have been mainly positive, and I've made some wonderful friends, so hang in there Jason and use the iggy button: it is the path to serenity IMO :bigrin:

:2cents:

Jason, Like you, I feel very uncomfortable talking to anyone who is not polite, considerate, and respectful. I really don't think age has anything to to with their being that way. I'm sorry that you've gotten a bad opinion of us older folks.

My experience here has been mostly good. I tend to avoid those with whom I do not share mutual interests, find their subjects repugnant, or they are obviously striving to create friction.

This is a wonderful site and I feel like I've gained a few friends here, too. But, just like society in general, there are those who fit my realms of interest, and some who do not. I cherish those who do fit and ignore those who don't!

This is one of the reasons that I don't do much with chat rooms or IM's.

There are idiots like that all over the web. The ones that I always hated were the one's that start out with "Hi. a/s/l?". I hate those creeps. when I see those come up in a pm, I always respond with "What are you looking for? All of that info is in my profile."

About half the time, I never hear from them again.

And then there are the ones that are in bumfuck overseas and they insist on doing cyber, AFTER being told repeatedly that I don't do that. Those idiots get told off and ignored.

There are all sorts in chat and the anonymity gives them impetus to behave like a horses ass.

But I'll bet you that those same ones are also complaining about those of us who don't give in to their stupidity. Not publicly, of course, since it would be embarrassing to them to out themselves, on the web, as the same assholes that everyone else complains about.

Never been in chat and never will.

Yep yep, we get our share of trolls and assholes in chat, and just as everyone else has stated, the iggy button Is your friend, dont hesitate to use it if you feel uncomfortable at any time.
What ticks me off are those who just see a name and automatically think its ok to PM and start asking questions. I tell them its always best to Ask before PM'ing someone you dont know. To my chat friends that I know well, they dont Have to ask my permission, just come ahead on. ;)
That's why we regulars have to teach em, but manners and class is always, manners and class..:}
Cat