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First encounter after coming out to my wife...

  1. axlton
    axlton
    I've only been out to my wife for about 2 months now. Tonight will be my first encounter since coming out to her. I set up a threesome with a gay couple. today we both briefly had our moments of doubt and panic but were able to talk it out and come to terms with it.

    tomorrow may be another story. I'm still not sure how she's gonna react once the deeds been done. She says that she knows I'll never leave her for another man, and that she understands that being bi is just part of who i am. That asking me to change would be like her saying well ok I don't like my brown eyes think I'll change them to blue. Just not possible.

    How was your first encounter after coming out to your wife? What was her reaction, and how did you resolve the situation... I've very curious to hear your stories.
  2. Herculoid Poirot
    Herculoid Poirot
    It's yet to happen my friend. Keep communicating with your wife, let her know how much she means to you, keep reassuring her. Then report back with all the lurid details!
  3. axlton
    axlton
    Well it went bad and good... first the bad, after spending a couple of hours talking to the guys we decided things felt right and the three of us headed to the bedroom... We all start fondling each other and they're both harder than a rock, but not much is happening for me. I was thinking too much of how my wife might be reacting and feeling guilty over the whole thing. However, I pressed on a bit and started going down on one of the guys, got him to the point of giving me a big blast of precum, then started going down on the other. while I'm doing this the free guy starts fingering my ass a bit. At this point I should have been rock hard, but with this guilty feeling I just couldn't go through with it. Couldn't even get it up. I apologized to the guys, told them what was going on with me and excused myself from the situation.

    Now the good... All I could think of at that point was getting home to my wife as soon as possible. I rushed to the house to find her already asleep, not even worried in the least. I told her what had happened with feeling guilty and not being able to go through with it, and all she had to say was "sorry you didn't get what you wanted". It was just a brief conversation over a cigarette that night, but we had a very in depth conversation the next day. We talked about my bisexuality the entire next day as a matter of fact.
  4. axlton
    axlton
    As it turns out, I was the one in need of reassurance. I went into great detail about how everything went down.We talked we laughed and as day wore into evening I realized for the first time in my life that there was this woman that I'm madly in love with and i don't have to keep secrets from her. She is really o.k. with it. It was only the second time in my life that I cried tears of joy, the other being the day our daughter was born.

    We're starting with me doing this kind of thing once a month to see how it goes and she gonna try to let me work it up to maybe once a week or so. Since my first experience didn't go so well she's gonna let me try again later on this week whenever I can get something set up.

    So, now that the deeds been done (well half done ) I feel much better about the security of my relationship with my wife. I know that she's not going anywhere. Ever.
  5. Herculoid Poirot
    Herculoid Poirot
    Thanks Axlton for sharing with us. As someone who is a few steps behind you on the road, I appreciate this realistic and heartfelt glimpse of things to come.

    Your wife is to be commended for her strength and understanding in this endeavour.

    P.S> better luck next time!
  6. axlton
    axlton
    Thanks for the well wishes, There is a guy i'm really interested in. My wife and i are gonna try to meet him sometime this week or next as time allows... I think we're both gonna feel better about it if we both meet my perspective sexual partners together. I know I'm gonna feel better about it knowing that she approves of who I'm doing this with at least.

    Having said that though, anything I do right now is gonna be short term as we are in the process of moving across state.
    Once that's finished I'm gonna start looking for more long term partners I can do this with on a regular basis.
  7. ExSailor
    Maybe 3 somes are not for you? Not everyone enjoys them. My partner and I love them but we know people of all sexual orientations even bisexuals who aren't into them. You should go back and have sex with those men who you wrote about and continue the 3 some.
  8. axlton
    axlton
    actually the very first m/m experience I ever had was a threesome and it still stands out as the best I've ever had. I thought getting back into this by kicking it off with another theesome would be a great experience, but there was just too much pressure. Coming out to my wife was a very emotional experience and this happened so soon after, it was just too much to handle. A lot has happened since then. I've been with several other guys and its gotten better each time. The most recent was fantastic. I'd still like to find the right guys to have a threeway with, but the others are out of the question as I've moved about 500 miles a way.
  9. SexyTanBiBoy
    SexyTanBiBoy
    I'm afraid that I had it easy. My wife was a bi when we met. She came out to me, and then at a swingers party, I ended up with another guy and loved it. She was very supportive then and still is now. Our relationship is very open and very strong. I consider myself extremely fortunate.
  10. Hypersexual11
    Hypersexual11
    After I came out to my wife, we decided to get a bi guy to have an MMF with. After a tedious search, we decided, well, she decided on a guy. We met him once over drinks and he seemed to know how to impress a lady. How he managed that I'll never get. He was short, probably 5'7" which isn't an issue with us but it seemed to be with him. He had this hair that stood up like 4 inches. We are jeans people and he shows up in a suit. Anyway, after the first meeting, the wife decided he would be fine. So he shows up for the big event and the wife is pretty nervous. We'd been married 28 years at this point and it had been a long time since any cock except mine had been in her. She went to the bedroom to get ready for us. We had a drink and went to join her. Things progressed rapidly as far as getting our clothes off. I got him nice and hard by sucking him. He says some stupid shit like, " I really am terrible at sucking dick so I dont bother". I put a rubber on him to fuck the wife and he goes soft. He never really recovers from that and doesn't get fully hard again that night. The wife is a trooper and rubs his dick around her pussy trying to get him going. He manages to fuck her for a few minutes before going soft again. I was pretty bored with this guy so I just went down on my wife while she made an attempt at sucking him off. A short time later, he announces he's cuming. I move up to watch and we share his load which was the only thing that night that I found very hot.

    Later he sends us a note apologizing for not being able to perform and "This has never happened before". So we give him another chance. The next time he never gets hard for a minute. He left and didnt try to contact us again. A few months later, we had an ad out looking for another guy and this guy answers the ad. He gives a full face shot, (professionally done) and states that he has had mmf experience and has always been invited back for an encore. ug

    We have gotten much better at choosing lovers. We now know all of the "I'm straight and/or married" clues.
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